A Summer to Remember

by Marilyn Pappano

  “Driving’s overrated.”

  Fia shook her head. “Driving is freedom.” Didn’t statistics show that giving up their cars was one of the hardest things for senior citizens? It was such a huge gift, the key to independence. More than anything, the realization that she was too big a danger to get behind the wheel had brought home to her how serious her condition really was.

  “Okay, yeah, driving is freedom. I get that. But Fia, who’s given you rides and fixed your meals and brought you whatever you need since you met Elliot?” Jessy waited a moment, one brow arched. “Elliot has. He’s a guy. He wants to take care of you.”

  “That’s the problem.” Fia shifted, paper crumpling beneath her. “Right now he wants to because he doesn’t know the extent of what’s going on. But if he sticks around, it won’t be his choice anymore. He’ll have to. He’s too good a guy to walk away.”

  A lump formed in her throat, and a sorrowful tear seeped down her cheek. “And that’s a situation I just can’t bear.”

  * * *

  The lunch rush was slowing Wednesday, and Elliot was making a start on the next day’s special—individual chicken pot pies—when Fia and Jessy stopped by the shop. Elliot liked the redhead and could easily imagine meeting her at any of the bars he’d frequented before Fia. They would have danced a few dances, shared a few beers, then gone back to her place or to a motel or even the backseat of her car. And when it was over, he still would have liked her, and she still would have liked him. Then, the way those things usually ran, he would have gone to some sort of party a few weeks or months later, and there she would be with one of his buddies.

  Good times.

  But not as good as these times with Fia.

  The two women bypassed the counter and came into the kitchen. “Morning, ladies,” Jessy said, giving quick hugs to Patricia and Lucy, then patting Elliot’s arm. He grunted hello and watched Fia do the same before coming around the table to him. She looked incredible in a thin, flowy dress and sandals in bright, summery colors, no sleeves in the way to hide her impressive biceps and triceps. He’d known some female soldiers who’d clearly counted fitness as one more tool in their arsenal to help keep them alive. They’d been buff and hard, but not like Fia.

  “Hi,” she greeted him softly, brushing her mouth to his cheek.

  “Hey, you. Did the doc give you a clean bill of health?” He kept his voice as light as he could, but the question made his breath catch in his lungs. If there was something wrong…

  The other women stopped their conversation to look at her, too, and Fia wrinkled her nose and shook her head. “This was more a checkout than a checkup. He got orders to his next assignment, and the doctor who’s taking his place hasn’t arrived yet. So I got all dressed up and even put on my prettiest underwear just to talk for a few minutes.”

  “You always wear your prettiest underwear,” Lucy pointed out. In an aside to Elliot, she said, “You ever want to get her a gift, try underwear—pretty—no black, white, or beige—or flip-flops in cool colors.” Lucy lifted her own foot to display a shoe identical to Fia’s except in color. “The brand is Oofos. The comfort is supreme, and the periwinkle, lilac, and melon shades are adorable.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind,” he said with a laugh, while his brain was wondering why the hospital clinic had scheduled an appointment for Fia with a doctor who was already halfway out the door in the transfer process.

  “So what did you talk to him about?” He narrowed his gaze and feigned a frown. “Was it you he was checking out? Saying, ‘Hey, pretty girl, I’m a doctor. Want to go to—’”

  “Fort Wainwright,” she filled in with a shudder. “Alaska? It would take way more than a doctor to get me up to the land of eternal cold. So, no, he wasn’t checking me out…though I did see him give Jessy a few admiring looks.”

  “Men have been giving Jessy admiring looks since she was in the cradle,” Patricia said. “It’s her birthright. You kids want some lunch? We’ve got chicken with Elliot’s most delicious dumplins’.” At their looks, she made shooing motions toward the front. “Go look on the specials board out there.”

  Jessy tiptoed to see out the pass-through, then laughed. “It says that, Fee. ‘Chicken with Elliot’s most delicious dumplins.’ Where’s the g?”

  “There’s no g in that word,” Patricia admonished as she began rolling out another batch of piecrusts. “A good Georgia girl like you should know that.”

  Jessy tossed her red hair. “I have been many kinds of girl, Patricia, but good has never been one of them.”

  When the laughter quieted, Elliot asked, “You want to eat?”

  Fia hesitated before nodding. “I do.”

  Had he ever known a woman who needed to think when asked that question? On the Ross ranch, food was sustenance that provided the strength to work twelve-hour days. A person ate whether they wanted to, and they ate well. Of course, Fia didn’t work on a ranch in hotter-than-hell Texas, but she still needed regular high-calorie meals until she put back on the weight she’d lost.

  “Go ahead and take your break, Elliot, and have lunch with the girls,” Patricia suggested. “If we get busy, we can give a shout out.”

  “Nah, I can help,” Jessy volunteered. “Dalton’s parents are stopping by this evening on their way home to Texas, and his mom insists on feeding me enough for two or three. I fast a day before she comes and another after she leaves. Tell me what to do.”

  So Elliot wound up sitting alone at a corner table with Fia, two bowls of steaming dumplings between them, along with two glasses of pop. “It’s kind of nice to be on this side of the counter once in a while,” he commented as he watched her scoop a dumpling, blow on it, then bite into it.

  “Yumm. Oh, Elliot, that’s good. Your grandma’s in Heaven smiling at you.”

  “She always smiles on me. That’s what grandmas do.” Belatedly, he remembered that Fia’s grandmothers hadn’t smiled on her when they were around and probably weren’t in a place now where smiles came easily.

  They ate a few minutes in silence before he casually returned to the earlier conversation. “It’s a shame you had to interrupt your day, go to the hospital, and wait, just to find out that the doctor’s not going to actually do anything.”

  She cut a large dumpling with the side of her fork, ate half, then speared the other piece without lifting it from the bowl. When she looked up, she gave him a sunny smile. “It’s not like my day really had anything going on to interrupt. Besides, it was a nice chance to visit with Jessy.”

  Elliot’s fingers tightened around his own fork. “Why did she go with you? Did your car not start?”

  An uncomfortable shade of pink crept into Fia’s cheeks, and she broke gazes with him under the guise of reaching for her drink. “When Lucy had her heart attack, it was so sudden and unexpected that the poor woman couldn’t get any time to herself for weeks afterward. Her mom came out when it happened, and she came again with her dad at Christmas. Between them, Joe, and all of us, we went everywhere with her. You know, family’s there when you need them, when you want them, and sometimes when you don’t.”

  “Yeah, I know. But…” Should he drop it? Just let go for now? He didn’t want to be pushy or intrusive. He should wait until she was ready to tell him, but what if she never was? How much farther would things have to go between them before she trusted him with a little medical information?

  “But?” she repeated, prodding him.

  He shrugged, managed half a grin, and said, “I was just going to say that you didn’t have a heart attack…did you?”

  “Oh, hell, no. My heart is incredibly strong considering that it’s been broken more than once.” She ate a few more bites. “I grew up poor, and Jessy grew up in luxury, but other than that, we come from kind of the same place. Her parents didn’t approve of her. They didn’t love or support her. If she wasn’t going to be the same snooty, phony, fake people they were, they wanted nothing to do with her. They turned their back on her, and she s
ailed out of their life after high school without ever looking back. She’s kind of like the big sister I never had, and I’m the little sister she does have who pretends not to know her.”

  “So you’re all friends, but she’s special.”

  Fia nodded, then grinned slyly. “Besides, Dalton and Dillon are likely to ask for her help with one of the animals, and she really prefers to be gone when that happens.”

  It sounded reasonable. Women did things together, like shopping, going to the bathroom, accompanying each other on appointments. And Elliot could hear in Fia’s voice, could see in her eyes, the affection and respect she had for Jessy.

  Wryly he polished off the last of his lunch. He’d met Fia so easily, hit it off with her so easily, fit into her life and fallen into her bed and gotten emotionally involved so easily. He’d expected it to continue that way. Perfect match, perfect romance, perfect life. He hadn’t expected road bumps.

  Your life has been filled with blessings, Em used to say. Don’t get greedy.

  He wasn’t greedy. He was grateful for everything he had. He just wanted a little more.

  But that was pretty much the definition of greedy, wasn’t it?

  * * *

  Fia hadn’t been truthful with Elliot yesterday about the doctor’s visit. They had just talked a bit, true enough, and the doctor really was getting assigned elsewhere, but the details of the conversation she’d kept to herself. Jessy would have told Patricia and Lucy, of course, and that was fine, but no one would rat out Fia to Elliot.

  I appreciate the fact that you’ve listened to me, she’d told him, but I need results. I can’t go through life never knowing when I’m going to fall apart. You’ve ruled out a lot of stuff, but I need someone to rule something in. I need a diagnosis. I need treatment. I need my life back.

  She’d been proud of herself for getting the speech out without tears, theatrics, or swearing. And he’d nodded somberly—the way he did everything—and told her a new doctor would be taking over her care. Basically, she would be starting over again. Same old stories to repeat to him. Old x-rays and EEGs and MRIs for him to review. New ones to order. And all on a snail’s timetable.

  And this morning she’d woken up with a migraine and a tender left arm that she couldn’t straighten. It made getting dressed awkward, so she tossed aside the polka dot bra she adored and the button-front shirt and chose gym shorts and a T-shirt instead. Even getting those on one-handed with every movement threatening to split her skull was tough. Thank goodness she’d cut all her hair off, or she would go around all day looking as if she’d caught her head in a blender.

  Mouse followed her from the bedroom to the bathroom, where she pocketed a pill for her headache, then trotted to the back door. Fia held on to the wall with her good hand, made her way to the laundry room, and found a length of clothesline she used to stretch above the bathtub to hang her lingerie. Judging from Mouse’s ever-more anxious barks, it was taking her forever, but soon she had one end of the line knotted to the ring on Mouse’s collar and the other to the stair railing.

  “I hate to send you out like this, pretty girl, but stairs and migraines are a dangerous combination for me.” After making sure the knot at the post was secure, she stepped out of the way, and Mouse raced past her. She didn’t go to the grass, of course, but squatted on the patio and peed, cringing every time it splashed back on her legs. Then she chose a clean square of concrete to poop on.

  “That’ll teach me to skip taking you for a walk.” Leaving the door open, Fia went to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of water from the refrigerator before surveying the food there, wondering if anything would stay down. Leftover dumplings, hamburger patties, a variety of cheeses, kiwis, spinach, oranges. Elliot was determined to keep her potassium and magnesium levels up to stave off any more muscle spasms.

  If only it were that simple.

  She closed the door, took a loaf of his bread from its wrapper, and tore off a small piece. She was on her way to check on Mouse when she almost tripped over her.

  “Sweetie, I’m your best friend when your daddy is working. Please don’t break me.”

  Fia unhooked the puppy, and totally unapologetic, Mouse went to her dish and chowed down on the nuggets Elliot had poured for her. Nibbling a tiny bite of bread, Fia closed the back door and gauged the distance between where she stood and the bed versus the couch. The bed was more comfortable, but the couch was closer, so she was shuffling that way when the phone rang.

  Though she didn’t recognize the ringtone, Fia’s hand went automatically to her pocket before she realized it was Elliot’s phone on the kitchen counter. Tucking the water into the crook formed by her stiff arm, she picked it up. Caller ID showed it was Emily of the funny stories, devoted sister and all-around good person. It would be polite to let it go to voice mail, but Fia couldn’t resist.

  “Elliot’s phone.”

  There was a moment of silence, then a female version of Elliot’s voice chuckled. “Elliot’s sister here. And you must be Elliot’s girl.”

  Elliot’s girl. Oh, she loved the sound of that. But her brain insisted on adding for the moment, and the pleasure faded.

  “I’m Fia.” She reached the couch and sank onto the cushions. Snagging the throw from the back, she spread it over her and snuggled deep into the cushions. “Elliot must have been in a hurry this morning since he left his phone here. He has to be at work at oh-dark-thirty.”

  “Oh.” Was there a wealth of meaning in that small syllable, or was Fia imagining it? Probably imagining, because when Emily went on, there was no change in her tone. “I bet he’s loving that job. He’s always had way more interest in food than most people. I thought any woman he settled down with would be doubly lucky, not only in getting a great guy but an outstanding personal chef, too. His red onion and olive focaccia bread…Oh, my.”

  “I haven’t had that yet. Everything else has been fabulous, though.”

  “Just wait. He’ll fix you every dish in his repertoire before long. I think it’s part of his way of taking care of people. It was important to our grandmother that everyone was happy and comfortable and provided for, and El’s the same way. It’s a lot of responsibility, but it’s what makes him happy. And as long as he’s being such a giver, I don’t have to.” Her laugh denied the truth of her last comment. “So you’re an Oklahoma girl—or as the men in my family like to say, Far North Texas.”

  The crunching in the kitchen stopped, and Mouse appeared around the counter, nails clicking on the floor before she lightly jumped onto the couch and settled in next to Fia’s legs. “I’m actually from Florida, but God rescued me and brought me here.”

  Letting her eyes drift shut, Fia mentally sighed. A quiet dark room, Mouse curled up against her, warm and snuggly, and a friendly voice on the phone. For a bad time, it was pretty good.

  “He talks about you a lot,” she said. “Sounds like you two had a great childhood.”

  Emily laughed. “We did, despite driving each other crazy, along with our parents and the rest of the family. We picked on each other, played practical jokes, wished each other out of our lives from time to time, but if anybody else said or did anything against one of us, all hell broke loose. I didn’t fully appreciate him at the time, but he’s the best brother a woman could ask for.”

  And the best man a woman could ask for. Ignoring the twinge around her heart, Fia asked, “So you have three kids?”

  “Two girls and a boy. They drive each other and the rest of us crazy. When school’s out, we’re taking them to Six Flags, and we’re planning to spend a few days in Tallgrass. We’re looking forward to sharing the insanity and meeting you.”

  Their trip would probably be the end of May, the beginning of June. Would she and Elliot still be together? He’s such a giver, Emily had said. Would he give too much to Fia and stick around? Or would he understand why she couldn’t commit to him and let things end?

  A tear slid down her cheek to land on the pillow, but her voice still
sounded pretty even. “That would be nice.” In a normal world, she would love to meet his family, to be welcomed and embraced as one of their own, to have parents, a sister, nieces, and a nephew, even if they were all in-laws. It would be a totally new experience for her, and she could hardly even imagine how wonderful it would be.

  But her world wasn’t normal, and her heart could break only so many times.

  “Listen, Fia, I didn’t mean to interrupt your day. I was just going to let Elliot know that the trip is definite. If Bill and I tried to back out now, there would be rioting in the streets. Tell him that, will you?” Emily’s voice turned sly. “I’ll tell him myself that I like his girl. I think we’ll be great friends, Fia.”

  In a normal world, Fia thought they could be, too. But…

  “Thanks. It’s nice meeting you, Emily.”

  After hanging up, Fia dug the migraine pill from her pocket, lifted her head high enough to swallow it with some water, then lay back down with a sigh. Whatever happened, she could deal with it, right?

  Though, God help her, she would be more than happy to stop dealing with problems for a while.

  * * *

  “Tell me again why you rented an apartment?”

  Elliot looked up from the kitchen, where he was applying a piece of duct tape to the bag of dog food. It was kind of pointless keeping it there when Mouse was spending way more time at Fia’s place than their own. He was spending way more time there, too. In the week since they’d first made love, the only night he’d come home to sleep was Thursday, when her migraine had left her too worn out to do anything but sleep.

  And he’d lain in that bed across the room, missing her, and worried himself to sleep.

  “Because you didn’t fall into bed with me the night we met.”

  Fia gave him a sweet smile. “You didn’t ask me to.”

  “It just seemed kind of tawdry.”

  “Tawdry?” She laughed. “What twenty-eight-year-old man uses the word tawdry?”