So Over It

by Stephanie Morrill

  I thought of Connor’s suggestion, that maybe Eli had fudged the truth, but I didn’t speak it. I liked blaming Aaron, especially since Heather thought him a scumbag, whereas Eli had been my friend for years.

  Of course, just because blaming Aaron was easiest didn’t mean it was right.

  “Do you think we could talk to Lane about this?” I asked, clasping my hands so they’d stop trembling. “I want to know more about who Aaron is.”

  She nodded. “After the shower.”

  “No way.” Lane shook her head emphatically. “He wouldn’t do that.”

  Heather sighed, her patience sounding worn. “Lane, if you’d just consider it for a second . . .” She trailed off as Lane continued wagging her head.

  “Look, I’ll be the first one to admit Aaron’s not perfect. That he’s far from perfect. But in the two years we dated, he was totally respectful.”

  Heather narrowed her eyes. “Totally respectful?”

  Lane shifted her weight. “Okay, maybe not totally respectful. But he understood what ‘no’ meant. For the most part.” Lane looked at me. “I hope I’m not being insensitive. It sounds like you went through something awful. But I don’t think Aaron would’ve done that.”

  Now two of the three people who’d heard my recollection of that night doubted it lined up with the truth.

  “Although it wouldn’t have been uncommon for Aaron to have drugs, would it?” Heather asked, her voice somehow gentle but pointed.

  Lane shot her sister a look Abbie and I sometimes exchanged. A “how dare you go there” kind of look. “Being friends with Nate doesn’t mean he was doing them. And this is too big an accusation to assume guilt by association.” When Lane looked back at me, her expression and voice softened. “Is there no one else who could’ve done it?”

  I shifted. “Not as easily as Aaron.”

  “Well . . .” Lane’s jaw hardened and she shook her head. “No. The Aaron I know wouldn’t have done that. You should consider who else might have.”

  25

  I realized I’d been sitting there staring at my yellow polished cotton instead of pinning together the pieces that would become my dress for Heather’s wedding. I reached for a straight pin and tried to keep my brain on task. Normally sewing absorbed all my attention. I’d start on a project, look up, and five hours would have slipped away. But ever since Saturday, since Lane defended her slimy ex-boyfriend, I couldn’t think about anything else.

  Again and again, I’d turned over the events of Jodi’s party, hoping to find something. A hidden clue to unlock the truth of what had happened. Three days later, my efforts were still fruitless.

  But right now I didn’t need to think about that night, just this dress. Threading the pin through the fabric, watching the neckline come together.

  “What’s up?”

  “Ouch!” I yelped as the pin pricked my tender fingertip. Abbie grimaced. “Sorry. I assumed you’d heard me come in.”

  I sucked on my finger before the blood could stain my carefully selected fabric. “You need something?”

  “I’m heading to class. Cool if I hand him off to you?” Without waiting for an answer—or for me to put away my straight pins—she dumped Owen onto my lap.

  “Yeah, sure.” I hastily pushed away sharp objects and arranged him better on my hip.

  Abbie turned to leave, but paused when something caught her eye.

  “Is this what you’re making?” From my bed, she picked up the pattern envelope.

  “Yeah. It’s for Heather’s wedding.”

  “Wow.” She looked from the faded artist rendering to the pieces draped around my sewing machine. “It’s adorable.” “Connor says I’ll look like a 1950s housewife.”

  Abbie snorted. “What does he think you should wear to the wedding? Sweatpants?”

  “I think he just wishes I’d dress a little more normal.”

  “But what’s the fun in that? It’s gonna be beautiful.” Abbie returned the pattern to the bed. “You’re really talented, you know.”

  She said that last part quietly. Abbie and I didn’t compliment each other often. Except when forced, like if she said, “I look so fat,” I’d obviously say, “No you don’t. You look great.” And vice versa.

  “Too bad it’s not something important.” I packed away my materials as best I could with one hand.

  “Who says it’s not important?”

  “You know what I mean.”

  She shook her head.

  “It’s not like nursing or teaching or something actually valuable to the world.”

  Abbie frowned. “If it wasn’t valuable, why would God waste time giving you the talent?”

  I stared at her. “I guess I never thought of God giving it to me.”

  “Of course he did. When Owen was born, Amy gave me a card that said every good thing comes from above.” She tapped my sewing machine. “That includes this.” She glanced at my alarm clock. “Okay, now I really need to go.” Over her shoulder she called, “He’ll be ready for his nap in forty-five minutes.”

  Then she dashed out the door and left me sitting there, caught totally off guard.

  I closed my eyes and tried not to pay too much attention to their conversation. Tricky, since they kept asking my opinion.

  “What do you think, Skylar?” Lisa popped her bubble gum. “The guy leaning against the fence. I say an eight.”

  Madison chewed on the stem of her sunglasses. “See, I think he’s a six who acts like an eight.”

  “What do you think, Skylar?” Lisa asked again.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Oh, that’s right,” Lisa stage-whispered to Madison. “She’s got a boyfriend now.”

  They giggled, and I bit back a frustrated growl. Why had I thought it’d be a good idea to come out with them? Guilt had made the decision for me. I’d been dodging their calls since I returned from Hawaii.

  Hawaii. It seemed like a million years ago.

  “Hello? Skylar?”

  I blinked and realized one of them had said something to me. “What?”

  “Eli’s here.” Madison nodded at the entrance.

  I shifted at the sight of him swaggering into the fenced-off pool area. John trailed behind him, as always.

  Madison nudged Lisa. “How would you rate John? A three? A two?”

  Lisa rolled her big, clear eyes. “Are negative numbers allowed?”

  Eli spotted me. Surprise crossed his face, but an instant later it vanished. He said something to John and they headed toward us. Toward the group of empty chaises next to me. “Great,” I muttered.

  “You wanna go?” Madison asked.

  “No.” I straightened my back. “My family pays to belong here just like his.”

  As I watched Eli dodge a group of kids running around the pool, pride bloomed within me. The girl I’d been this spring would’ve tucked tail and run from what was sure to be a not-fun exchange, but now I found myself amused rather than nervous. Something to be thankful for. Something to smile about.

  Eli, unfortunately, assumed I intended the smile for him and he smiled back. “What’s going on, girl?” His voice sounded oddly casual.

  “Sitting at the pool.”

  “Right.” He plopped into the chaise beside me and made a show of looking around. “No bodyguard, I see.”

  “I gave him the day off.”

  On the other side of me, Lisa groaned. “You gotta be kidding me.”

  At first I thought she meant John, who was making a production out of taking off his shirt, but she appeared to be looking past him. Then I saw—Jodi and Alexis stood near the entrance, scouting out chairs.

  I sat up straighter. “Unbelievable.”

  The seven of us hadn’t all been together since sophomore year when the whole Alexis-Seth-Madison triangle exploded.

  Alexis and Jodi spotted us at the same time. Alexis seemed intent on pulling Jodi off to another section of the pool, but Jodi squared her shoulders and marched our directi
on. Alexis dragged her feet like a moping toddler.

  “Hey, guys,” Jodi said, her smile bright like sunshine. “Guess we weren’t the only ones who thought the weather was perfect for swimming.”

  It was ninety degrees outside and sticky as a cinnamon roll. The only other smart choice would be hitting the air-conditioned mall.

  “Hey, Alexis,” Madison said with a fake smile.

  Alexis’s delicate features hardened—her mouth pursed, her jaw set. She snagged the chaise beside John and made a show of dragging it several feet away.

  Jodi glanced at her, then down the row at Lisa and Madison. They pointedly turned away from her. They probably thought it’s what I’d want.

  Jodi looked at me.

  I’d sworn to myself that I’d loathe her for all eternity. I thought I’d doubt her sincerity to the very end. That I’d never be able to trust her, especially around Connor. But when her eyes met mine, searching, the fight drained from me. Jodi and I were on the same side. I was over it.

  “I like your shirt,” I said, and I did. “Where’d you get it?” Alexis, Lisa, and Madison united—they all looked at me with wide eyes. Eli and John looked too, but only because I’d been the last one to speak. They never seemed in tune with whatever drama we girls had going on.

  Jodi’s face brightened as she took a seat on the other side of Alexis. “You’re gonna hate it when I tell you.”

  “Seriously. Gap?”

  “You know me. I own maybe two things from other stores.”

  I groaned. “That’s just not right.”

  “I’ve worked there for two years and get a discount. What do you expect?”

  “A little creativity.”

  “So not my thing.”

  Jodi smoothed sunscreen on her arms, then offered the bottle to Alexis, who whipped it from her hand like a little kid stealing back a favorite toy.

  Jodi turned back to the rest of us. “Cool suit, Lisa.”

  “Thanks,” Lisa said in a cautious voice. She glanced at me, seeming unsure of how to handle this. She didn’t have anything personal against Jodi, but we’d spent a lot of time trash-talking her recently.

  Madison stood and wrapped her long hair in a loopy bun. “It’s too hot. I’m getting in.” She surveyed the rest of us. “Anyone else?”

  “Sure.” I dropped my sunglasses to the ground.

  “Yeah, me too,” Lisa said.

  “Of course.” Alexis acted as though she didn’t intend for us to hear, but obviously she did intend, because from three chaises down, I heard just fine.

  I swiveled in my seat, facing her. “Do you have something to say, Alexis?”

  She smiled sweetly. “I just think it’s great how the three of you have formed, like, a little club. What do you guys call yourselves? The boyfriend stealers? The trampy—”

  “I didn’t steal anybody’s boyfriend,” Lisa said, standing. “You stole mine.”

  John sank lower in his lounge.

  “Whatever. You guys were over. You just didn’t want to admit it.” Alexis glared at Madison. “Unlike me and Seth.”

  Madison laughed, big and careless. “Alexis, it was two years ago. Get over it.” Then she took several steps toward the pool and slid into the cool water, effectively escaping the response Alexis stuttered.

  Alexis squinted at Madison’s slippery figure beneath the water. “I never liked her.”

  Lisa turned to me and said, “Let’s just go. This isn’t fun anymore.”

  “I’m not being chased out of my own pool,” I said, gripping the hot concrete with my bare toes.

  “You think everything belongs to you. Don’t you, Skylar?” Alexis said. “You think you can do whatever you want and it doesn’t affect anybody else. This is your world. The rest of us are just living in it.”

  “Don’t talk to her like that.” Eli’s response sounded lazy, as if he hadn’t intended to defend me, just reacted.

  Alexis snapped upright in her chair. “You don’t talk to me. Period. My boyfriend has a black eye thanks to you.”

  “Your boyfriend deserved it.” Eli shielded his eyes and looked at Alexis. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

  “Okay, Eli,” I said in a threatening voice. I so didn’t want to get into all that.

  He answered with a wry laugh. “What’s with you? It’s like no matter what I do, it’s wrong.” His eyes, as blue as the pool I now stood beside, pierced me. “Tell me the truth. Did you ever actually like me, or did you just date me because of Aaron?”

  “Because of Aaron?” Alexis’s gaze flicked between the two of us. “Somebody explain.”

  I sighed. “Eli, I did like you. Okay?”

  Madison bobbed up along the edge of the pool. She squinted up at Lisa and me. “You guys coming in, or what?”

  “Somebody better tell me what’s going on,” Alexis shrieked. “Or I’m going to freak out.”

  “Going to?” Lisa said.

  “You say you liked me, but you never acted like you did. Not for one second.” Eli’s voice rose with each word. “If I hadn’t walked in and rescued you from Aaron, you’d never have given me a shot. Would you?”

  Was it possible to hear blood racing through your veins? I kept my gaze locked on Eli, but I could feel the eyes of everyone else.

  “What are you guys talking about?” Alexis asked. “What happened with Aaron?”

  I thought of Connor, of how nicely he’d listened through the whole thing.

  Of Heather.

  Of Lane.

  They’d all been practice. Practice for this moment, for these people. These were the ones who needed to hear what had happened to me that night. They’d been the closest to me—except Madison—and they’d witnessed my painful year of reinvention. They needed to know the story behind the story.

  I’d gone all the way to Hawaii to try to escape this moment, and now I knew why. It was horrible.

  I looked away from Eli, to the rest of my old friends, not quite sure where to begin.

  “Tell us, Skylar.” Alexis planted her hands on her narrow hips. “What happened?”

  “At Jodi’s party last year—”

  “You don’t have to do this, Skylar.” Eli’s eyes shone with regret. “You don’t have to tell them.”

  Alexis roared at this. “I want a real explanation! I’m tired of being left in the dark!”

  Quick like a Band-Aid. One, two, three . . .

  “Aaron roofied me at Jodi’s party. Nothing happened, but only because Eli caught him in time.” I looked at Eli, who appeared miserable. “I’m grateful. That hasn’t changed.”

  “Aaron wouldn’t do that,” Alexis said. “He’s a nice guy. And the way he tells it—”

  “Alexis, shut up,” Lisa said. “Skylar just told us something huge. Can you think about someone other than yourself for five seconds?”

  “Wait,” I said. “How does Aaron tell it?”

  Alexis blinked her long lashes at me. “He says you clearly had too much to drink and Eli’s a jealous psycho. And that you left without even acknowledging him.”

  Eli sneered. “What’d he expect? He drugged her. I know it. His friends had the stuff.”

  I blinked at him. “His friends had the stuff? What does that mean?”

  “I . . .” Eli glanced at our audience.

  “Did you or did you not see Aaron put something in my drink?”

  “Okay, so I didn’t exactly see him put something in there, but—”

  “What’s wrong with you?” I marched back to my chair, snatched my shorts and tank, and wrestled them over my suit. “You said you saw him.”

  Eli swallowed hard. “I think what I said is that I maybe saw him.”

  “I don’t care!” I poked him in the collarbone with my finger. “You told me you saw him, and I believed you.”

  He kept his gaze fixed on the ground. “I saw you and him talking, and then he went into the kitchen to get you a drink. Sarah Humphrey came over and handed him the cup that he gave to you.
”

  I blinked rapidly. “So you didn’t actually see a roofie.”

  “Well, not right then, but that thug boyfriend of Sarah’s had them. John and I saw them earlier in the night. Remember?” Eli appealed to John, but he seemed unwilling to say anything. Eli swallowed again and looked at me. “We did. So, I mean, it’s obvious that Aaron and Nate had worked out something, and Sarah was doing the legwork. It’s obvious.”

  He turned to the rest of the group, as if waiting for them to agree. No one spoke.

  “The only thing that’s obvious”—I jammed my feet into my shoes, ready to march all the way home—“is that you were willing to do whatever it took to get me.”

  “How did you plan to get home?”

  I turned. Jodi, Lisa, and Madison had followed me out to the parking lot.

  “I hadn’t really thought that far ahead.”

  “Let’s take my car.” Jodi fished keys from her pool bag. “And we better hurry. Only a matter of time before Eli comes out here after you.”

  We giggled as we sprinted toward her car. With my secret out, I felt light. So light that if a gust of wind came through, it might pick me up and carry me away.

  “Where are we going?” I asked as we fussed with seat belts.

  Jodi grinned and said, “Where do you think?”

  “Sixth grade,” Jodi said into her custard.

  “Sixth grade?” I said. “How did I not know this?”

  “Because that’s not the worst of it.” She bit her lip, trying not to smile. “Dylan Hollis.”

  “Dylan Hollis!” the three of us shrieked. Other patrons of Sheridan’s turned and stared.

  “No way,” Madison said. “I mean, Dylan’s so . . . Dylan. Especially in sixth grade. How did that ever happen?”

  Jodi hid her red face in her hands, laughing. “We were on the yearbook team together because my mom thought I needed something brainier than cheerleading and—”

  “Stop right there,” Lisa said. “This is way too after-school-special. A beautiful, popular girl working late on yearbook with the class loser . . .”

  “Forget Dylan Hollis. I can’t get past the sixth grade part,” I said. “It could’ve been Carter Shaw, and I’d feel just as horrified.”