Hopeful Hearts

by Diann Hunt

  “’Tis a business trip had led him to a night of indiscretion. A night that would bring blessing and pain. Unable to live with the guilt, Thomas surrendered his heart to Christ tonight. He came to me to help him pray. ’Tis why he revealed this hidden sin to me. Still, the blessing of it ’Tis the gift of baby Abigail.

  “I wondered how the child’s mother could leave her baby. She didn’t want the responsibility, says Thomas. He gave her money for her trouble, and she went on her way. Me heart breaks at the thought of the future. Thomas has decided it best to keep the truth from Lavina.

  “After the doctor told Lavina she would never have children, despair overtook her. One day a knock sounded at their door, and she opened it to see a tiny child wrapped in warm blankets, sleeping peacefully in a basket. Lavina was convinced God had seen her distress and come to her aid. Thomas could not bring himself to hurt her once more.

  “He means well, but I wonder at his wisdom in this matter. Can it ever be good to conceal a truth? I’m afraid only time will tell.”

  Eliza closed the book with a triumphant snap. Titus felt sick. He had dreamed of this day, and now that it was here, it loomed over him like a dark shadow. How could he hurt this wonderful family who had brought him into their home, treated him as a son? He couldn’t deny pain still lurked and rekindled his pride, but he refused to surrender to it.

  “So, when shall we bring this to light?” Eliza was asking, pulling Titus from his thoughts.

  He sighed and ran fingers through his hair. “Eliza, I don’t know. I need to think on this.”

  She looked at him a moment. “All right, we should have a plan to get the most from this. You give it some thought, and I will, too. Then we’ll meet back here in the barn tomorrow night. Will that work for you?”

  He stared at her.

  She placed her hands on her hips. “Well, will it?”

  He knew she had him where she wanted him. She could tell the O’Connors he had been snooping in the study that day. They would piece things together as to why he was there. No matter how it turned out, he would lose. He needed to think things through, stall Eliza in any way he could.

  “Yes.”

  Her face relaxed. “Good. It’s all settled then.” She turned to go.

  “One thing, Eliza.”

  She looked back at him. “What is it?”

  “When the truth is revealed and their family torn apart, where will you go?”

  She smiled. “My parents will have to take me back. Where else would I go?”

  “So this is about you going home?”

  Her face turned hard, rigid. “It’s about bringing down this goody-goody family. I’m sick of their religion, their wealth being shoved in my face.” Her face contorted with every word. Titus wondered if bitterness made him look like that. “Ever since I was a child, it was always their family with the money, the happy times, while our family struggled. Just ask my father. He will tell you. He’s tired of living in the shadow of his big brother. I don’t blame him. I detest them all.”

  Titus cringed at the venom in her voice. This family didn’t deserve her harsh words. Still, he couldn’t fault Eliza when he had thought the same about them at one time.

  But not anymore.

  He nodded at her. “Tomorrow then.”

  “Tomorrow,” she said with a gleam in her eye. She turned and walked away. He watched her, amazed at how bitterness had taken this woman’s beauty and destroyed it. Something told him his ma had seen that same look on him.

  He had much to think about.

  The next day, Titus knew he should feel guilty about not going to the O’Connors’ house, but it was the only chance he had for stalling Eliza. He stepped from his barn after feeding the horse and walked toward his house. Abigail’s horse and empty wagon stood out front. His feet stopped. Had she come? With Eliza?

  He took a deep breath and stepped inside. Pulling off his hat, he turned to his ma and Abigail. “Hello. Is everything all right?”

  Ma cut in. “She wanted to drop off some chicken noodle soup for Jenny.” With her gaze pinned on him, she added, “Since Jenny is feeling so poorly.” He didn’t miss her look of disapproval. Did Abigail see it? He quickly looked at Abigail, but she didn’t seem to notice Ma’s chastisement.

  Fortunately, Jenny was taking her morning nap, so Abigail could believe his sister might be sick.

  “I do hope she is feeling better soon,” Abigail said, glancing at Jenny’s form on her bed. “Father told me you stopped in last night and let them know you wouldn’t be there today because Jenny was feeling ill, so I thought I’d bring her something.”

  He glanced at Ma. She still glared at him. “Thank you, Abigail. That’s very kind of you.”

  She smiled.

  “Well, it’s almost lunchtime. Would you care to join us?” Ma said.

  “Oh no, I couldn’t do that.”

  “Oh yes, you could,” Ma persisted.

  Titus knew Ma was inviting Abigail to make him uncomfortable. One thing about it, Ma could sure be stubborn. He supposed that’s why her prayers got through. No doubt the Lord got tired of her nagging.

  “Well, if you put it that way,” Abigail said with a laugh.

  “Good. Titus, help set the table, please.”

  Titus threw her a wait-till-I-get-you-alone look and commenced to set the table.

  Once the meal was over and the good-byes were said, Titus walked Abigail out to the wagon. “I’m glad Jenny seems to be doing better today. Maybe lunch helped.”

  Titus swallowed hard. “Do you think your parents would want me to come today?”

  She shook her head. “Though it’s hard to get along without you, I’m sure we could manage for one day.” She laughed.

  “Is Jonathan leaving today?”

  She looked down and nodded.

  “I take it you’ve decided to part ways?”

  With her head still bent, she answered, “Yes.”

  He lifted her chin in his hand. “I’m glad.”

  His heart turned over with the sight of her. He loved this woman and could see in her eyes that she loved him, too. He wanted her to be his wife, but their future rested in the hands of another.

  Eliza O’Connor.

  “You want to tell me what that was all about?” Ma said when Titus went back inside.

  He scratched his head and took the load from his feet, falling into a kitchen chair. Bowing his head, he stretched fingers through his hair, staring at the table.

  Ma sat down nearby, her hand reaching over to him. “Titus, what is it?”

  He explained the whole story to her. His life, his bitterness, his need for God, his love for Abigail, and now Eliza’s scheme.

  Ma thought a moment. “I see. The only solution I can see to this problem is God.”

  He looked at her.

  “You’ve been running long enough, Titus. You see where your way has taken you. Our way is never the right way. God’s way is always right. Now, mind you, I’m not saying everything will turn out the way you want it, but I’m saying He will help you through it.”

  Titus hung his head and nodded. His eyes filled with tears. He couldn’t remember the last time he had cried. He thought his tears had all dried up. Ma led him in a prayer. Titus recommitted his love for the Lord and offered himself as an empty vessel for God to use as He saw fit. No matter what the consequences. Once the prayer was over, he knew things were different. He felt better, lighter.

  He would face Eliza directly come Monday. He wouldn’t discuss the matter at church. She’d have to wait.

  Eliza did wait, though not happily so. Titus would not ruin Sunday with their talk of destroying the O’Connor family. He hoped the Lord would give him a way yet to get out of the whole ordeal. Most of all, he didn’t want to hurt Abigail. Perhaps Eliza would give it up—though he knew that was about as likely as Chicago turning into a ghost town.

  He was right. Come Monday morning, bright and early, Eliza stood ready to greet him at the
barn when he pulled up, the journal held firmly in her hand. He prayed once again for strength and hopped from his wagon.

  Bitterness pushed her forward. Her eyes lit with the thrill of hurting another. “Are you ready?”

  He grabbed her hand. “Listen, Eliza, why are you bent on doing this? The O’Connors have been good to both of us, taking us in—”

  She jerked her hand away. “Oh, don’t tell me you’re going soft!”

  He blew out a frustrated sigh. “It’s just that I don’t see the sense in all this.”

  “I don’t believe you. You know Uncle Thomas stood by and watched your pa go under financially. No wonder your pa had a heart attack!” Her words hurt him to the core, but he saw his old reflection in her. The bitterness had twisted and marred her face in a way he hadn’t seen before on himself. But God saw it. And He had set Titus free.

  “There’s a better way, Eliza. God can help us—”

  She gasped. “What? You’ve got religion now?” She looked at him incredulously. Once again she took a proud stance. “Well, if I have to do this myself, so be it.” With that, she stomped across the yard toward the house.

  His stomach knotted like an old rope as he followed Eliza to the house. Chills pricked up his arm, and he broke out in a cold sweat. He hurled a frantic prayer for wisdom toward the heavens and stepped in just behind Eliza. She turned to him with surprise. The look on her face said she thought he would back her up. God help us.

  “Oh, good, I was just going to come out for you both. Breakfast is ready,” Mrs. O’Connor said. Titus felt it was more like the Last Supper.

  The family took their seats at the table. Titus glanced at Abigail. Her eyes questioned him as if she knew something was amiss.

  The dishes were passed, and Titus shoved eggs around on his plate, dreading what was sure to come.

  “Titus, I hope you’re not getting what your sister had. You’ve hardly touched a bite,” Mrs. O’Connor said.

  “Yes ma’am.”

  “Well, I discovered a bit of news the last time I went to Gramma’s house,” Eliza offered before biting into a piece of toast.

  All eyes turned to her. Mr. O’Connor spread some butter across his toast. “What might that be?” he asked in all innocence.

  A smile lit her face, and she looked the happiest Titus had ever seen her. She sickened him not only because of her behavior but because she reminded him so much of himself. How God could forgive him, Titus didn’t know. He only knew God had forgiven him, and he was thankful.

  Just then a knock sounded at the door.

  “I’ll get it,” Mr. O’Connor said, wiping his mouth with the cloth napkin then laying it on the table.

  Titus glanced at Eliza, who was frowning.

  “You were saying, Eliza?” Mrs. O’Connor continued.

  Eliza lifted her head. “Oh, nothing. It can wait. I’d rather share it with everyone here.”

  “Well, it seems I have to go out of town for railroad business, dear,” Mr. O’Connor said upon his return to the dining room.

  “Can’t you finish your meal, Thomas?” his wife asked.

  “No time. I’ve really got to run.”

  Mrs. O’Connor stood. “How long will you be gone?”

  He shook his head. “I’m not sure. Probably about a week.” His steps were already carrying him out of the room.

  Titus and Eliza exchanged a glance. She huffed and stood.

  “Are you all right?” Abigail wanted to know.

  “Nothing a week won’t cure,” Eliza said with a scowl.

  “I’m sorry?” Abigail asked.

  “Nothing.” With that, Eliza stomped out of the room.

  “What’s wrong with her?”

  Titus shrugged but said nothing. He pushed his plate aside. “I’m going back to work,” he announced before leaving Abigail alone at the table.

  Chapter 16

  Titus, feel free to grab a cup of coffee, if you want, and come back in about an hour,” Abigail said once she stepped from the carriage. It was ten o’clock, but the light fog persisted upon the city. Horses clip-clopped past them, with rattling buggies following close behind. Gas flames flickered from the streetlamps, mingling with the haze, wrapping the street in a mysterious glow.

  “You certain you won’t be finished before then? I don’t want to make you wait.”

  Abigail smiled at his consideration. “I’m certain. I need to spend some time with Sophia.”

  Titus turned his hat around in his hands, a familiar gesture to which Abigail had grown accustomed. “Are you all right, Titus?”

  He looked at her with eyes that said he had much to say. Still, he kept silent. He finally nodded and shrugged on his hat, and then turned back toward the carriage. She watched him pull away, her heart heavy. Grabbing a fistful of her skirt, she walked toward the Thread Bearer.

  The bell jangled overhead as she entered. The smell of coffee drifted from the kitchen. Sophia was at her usual place in the room, head bent over a sewing machine. She looked up with surprise.

  “Abigail, I’m so glad you came!” She got up and walked over to her friend.

  “You did say Wednesdays around ten o’clock was a good time for you, didn’t you? Is this still a convenient time for a visit?” Abigail hoped so, since she had already told Titus to leave.

  “This is perfect,” Sophia said. She grabbed Abigail’s hand. “Let’s get some coffee and sit down for a while in the kitchen.”

  Abigail pulled off her wraps and settled into her chair while Sophia poured the coffee into their cups. Once they both were seated, Sophia looked at Abigail. “So, tell me what’s going on in your life these days. Seems we never have time enough to talk at church.”

  With a nod, Abigail smiled.

  “Jonathan has left?”

  “Yes.” Her hands hugged the coffee cup. “It wasn’t the same. When we were together, things had changed. I think for both of us, though he wouldn’t admit it just yet.”

  “I’m sorry, Abby.”

  She shrugged. “It’s all right. I’m glad I had the chance to find it out rather than always wondering what might have been.” Glancing up with a smile, she said, “We did go ice-skating.”

  Sophia’s eyes sparkled. “Oh, you did? I haven’t gone ice-skating since I went with Jonathan on your behalf ages ago. Remember, when you had to go out of town with your parents and you wanted me to keep Mary Nottinger away from him?”

  They both laughed.

  “I’d forgotten all about that!” Abigail took a drink of her coffee and thought a moment. “Whatever happened to Mary, anyway? I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

  Sophia shook her head and looked away, lost in thought. “Mary. Bless her heart. Her mother, Alice, tells me Mary is off seeing the sights of Europe with a favorite aunt.” Sophia took another drink then put her cup down. “To tell you the truth, I think she was brokenhearted after your cousin Patrick left.”

  Abigail shook her head. “Mary pursued him like a hound after a fox, and Patrick couldn’t leave town fast enough.” They laughed again. “Truthfully, Patrick’s job at the railroad wasn’t what he wanted. He went back home.” Abigail paused a moment. “But he married shortly after, so I think he just wanted to get back to the woman he loved. I think Uncle Mark and Aunt Emma were glad he came home.”

  “How many uncles do you have?”

  “Just two. Three boys in the family; that’s it.”

  “Only two cousins, right?”

  “Right. Patrick is Uncle Mark’s son, and Eliza is Uncle Edward’s daughter.”

  A comfortable silence fell between them as they sipped on their drinks. “Are you doing all right, Abby?”

  Abigail looked at Sophia. “Yes. Why do you ask?”

  Sophia held her gaze. “Something seems not quite right. I can’t put my finger on it.”

  “We really are like sisters, you know.”

  Sophia lifted an eyebrow. “Oh?”

  “You can’t put your finger on what�
�s wrong because I can’t put a finger on it. I mean, I did the right thing by Jonathan. I love him dearly but as a friend. I see that now. And I know that I love Titus. It’s just that, well, I thought he felt the same way.”

  “And now?”

  “That’s what I mean. I don’t know. I once worried he had feelings for Eliza, but then I changed my mind. Yet for the past few days, he’s been acting strange. I’ve caught him whispering in corners with Eliza, which makes me think perhaps I was wrong. Possibly he does have feelings for her, and I’ve misread everything.”

  Sophia looked at her a moment. “I can’t imagine Titus falling for someone like Eliza. She doesn’t seem his type at all.” Sophia clasped her hands together at her chin as she listened.

  “That’s what I thought, but now I don’t know what to think.”

  “I’ll be praying for you, Abigail. And for Titus. Most likely, time will tell what’s bothering him. How is Jenny getting along?”

  Abigail felt herself lighten with the mention of the little girl. “Oh, Sophia, she is doing so well. She’s pretty much back to speaking normally again. Though she doesn’t talk a lot, she is able to communicate, which is better than before. I’m so proud of her.”

  “Sounds to me like the Lord has really used you to help that family.”

  She shook her head. “It has been my privilege. They have been through so much.”

  Sophia nodded. “Do you think Titus will ever go back to medical school?”

  “I don’t know. I pray for his future. I know that’s his dream. I pray one day the Lord will open doors for him.” Abigail picked up her cup and sipped a little more. “Now, tell me about you and Clayton and the baby. What is going on with you?”

  Sophia practically glowed. “I’m happy beyond belief. I feel wonderful, and I’m counting the days till the baby comes.” A thought seemed to hit her. “Oh, wait, I have to show you something.” Sophia got up and left the room for a moment. Abigail waited, smiling at her friend’s enthusiasm. She imagined her own parents’ excitement when they found her on their doorstep.