Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code af-3

by Eoin Colfer

  Spiro stared at the lab’s security monitors. The pictures had changed. There were no more guards slumbering around the facility.

  Instead, the screens played a tape of Spiro and his cronies breaking into Phonetix. With one crucial difference: there was no trace of Artemis on the screen.

  ‘What’s happening, Cube?’ spluttered Spiro. ‘You said that we’d all be wiped from the tapes.’

  ‘I lied. It must be the criminal personality I’m developing.’

  Spiro smashed the Cube against the floor. It remained intact.

  ‘Tough polymer,’ said Artemis, picking up the microcomputer.

  ‘Almost unbreakable.’

  ‘Unlike you,’ retorted Spiro.

  Artemis looked like a doll between Pex and Chips. ‘Don’t you understand yet? You’re all on tape. The Cube was working for me.’

  ‘Big deal. So we’re on tape. All I have to do is pay the security booth a visit and take the recordings.’

  ‘It’s not going to be that simple.’

  Spiro still believed that there was a way out.

  ‘And why not? Who’s gonna stop me? Little old you?’

  Artemis pointed to the screens. ‘No. Little old them.’

  The Chicago PD brought everything they had, and a few things they had to borrow. Phonetix was the city’s biggest single employer, not to mention one of the top five subscribers to the Police Benevolent Fund.

  When the 911 call came in the duty sergeant put out a citywide summons.

  In less than five minutes there were twenty uniforms and a full SWAT team beating on the Phonetix doors. Two choppers hovered overhead and eight snipers lined the roofs of the adjacent buildings. No one was leaving the area, unless they were invisible.

  The Phonetix security guard had returned from his rounds and just noticed the intruders on the monitors. Shortly after that he noticed a group of Chicago PD uniforms tapping the door with their gun barrels.

  He buzzed them in. ‘I was just about to call you guys,’ he said.

  ‘There’s a buncha intruders in the vault. They musta tunnelled in or somethin’, ‘cause they didn’t come past me.’

  The security guard on a restroom break was even more surprised.

  He was just finishing off the sports section of the Herald Tribune when two very serious-looking men in body armour burst into the cubicle.

  ‘ID?’ growled one, who apparently did not have the time for full sentences.

  The security guard held up his laminated card with a shaking hand.

  ‘Stay put, sir,’ advised the other police officer. He didn’t have to say it twice.

  Juliet slipped out from behind the pillar, joining the ranks of the SWAT team. She pointed her gun and roared with the best of them, and was instantly assimilated into the group. Their assault was cut short by a tiny problem. There was only one access-point to the lab. The lift shaft.

  Two officers prised open the lift door with crowbars.

  ‘Here’s our dilemma,’ said one. ‘We cut the power, then we can’t get the lift up here. If we call the lift up here first, then we tip off our intruders.’

  Juliet shouldered herself to the front of the group.

  ‘Excuse me, sir. Let me go down on the cables. I blow the doors and you cut the power.’

  The commander did not even consider it. ‘No. Too dangerous. The intruders would have plenty of time to put a hundred rounds into the lift.

  Who are you anyway?’

  Juliet took a small gripper from her belt. She clipped it on to the lift cable and hopped into the shaft.

  ‘I’m new,’ she said, disappearing into the blackness.

  ***

  In the laboratory, Spiro and Co. were hypnotized by the monitors.

  Foaly had allowed the screens to show what was actually happening on the upper levels.

  ‘SWAT,’ said Blunt. ‘Helicopters. Heavy armament. How did this happen?’

  Spiro smacked his own forehead repeatedly.

  ‘A set-up. This entire thing. A set-up. I suppose Mo Digence was working for you too?’

  ‘Yes. Pex and Chips too, even if they didn’t know it. You would never have come here if I’d suggested it.’

  ‘But how? How did you do this? It’s not possible.’

  Artemis glanced at the monitors. ‘Obviously it is. I knew you would be waiting for me in the Spiro Needle vault. After that, all I had to do was use your own hatred of Phonetix to lure you here, out of your environment.’

  ‘If I go down, so do you.’

  ‘Incorrect. I was never here. The tapes will prove it.’

  ‘But you are here!’ roared Spiro, his nerves shot. His whole body vibrated and spittle sprayed from his lips in a wide arc. ‘Your dead body will prove it. Give me the gun, Arno. I’m going to shoot him.’

  Blunt could not hide his disappointment, but he did as he was told.

  Spiro pointed the weapon with shaky hands. Pex and Chips stepped rapidly to one side. The boss was not known for his marksmanship.

  ‘You have taken everything from me,’ he shouted. ‘Everything.’

  Artemis was strangely calm. ‘You don’t understand, Jon. It’s like I told you. I am not here.’ He paused for breath. ‘And one more thing.

  About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.’

  And just like that, he disappeared.

  Holly had been hovering above Spiro and Co. all the way from the Spiro Needle to the Phonetix building. She had got permission to enter the facility minutes earlier when Juliet had called to enquire about the public tours.

  Juliet had put on her best cutesy voice for the security guide.

  ‘Hey, mister, is it OK if I bring my invisible friend?’

  ‘Sure it is, honey,’ replied the guide. ‘Bring your security blanket too, if it makes you happy.’

  They were in.

  Holly hovered at ceiling level, following Artemis’s progress below.

  The Mud Boy’s plan was fraught with risk. If Spiro decided to shoot him in the Needle, then it was all over.

  But no, just as Artemis predicted, Spiro had opted to gloat for as long as possible, basking in the glow of his own demented genius. But, of course, it wasn’t his own genius. It was Artemis’s. The boy had orchestrated this whole operation from beginning to end. It had even been his idea to mesmerize Pex and Chips. It was crucial that they plant the idea to invade Phonetix.

  Holly was ready when the lift door opened. She had her weapon charged and targets selected. But she couldn’t go. Wait for the signal.

  Artemis dragged it out. Melodramatic to the end. And then, just when Holly was about to disregard her orders and start blasting, he spoke.

  ‘I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.’

  Artemis the hunter. The signal.

  Holly squeezed the manual throttle on her wing rig and descended,

  stopping short a metre from the ground. She clipped Artemis on to a retractable cord on her Moonbelt, then dropped a sheet of cam foil in front of him. To everybody in the room, it would seem as though the boy had disappeared.

  ‘Up we go,’ she said, though Artemis could not hear her, and opened the throttle wide. In under a second they were nestled safely among the cables and ducts that ran along the ceiling.

  Below them, Jon Spiro lost his mind.

  Spiro blinked. The boy had gone! Just gone! It couldn’t be. He was Jon Spiro! Nobody outsmarted Jon Spiro! He turned to Pex and Chips, gesticulating wildly with the gun.

  ‘Where is he?’

  ‘Huh?’ said the bodyguards, in perfect unison. Unrehearsed.

  ‘Where is Artemis Fowl? What did you do with him?’

  ‘Nothing, Mister Spiro. We were just standing here playing the shoulder game.’

  ‘Fowl said
you were working for him. So hand him over.’

  Pex’s brain was churning. This was an operation akin to a food blender mixing concrete.

  ‘Careful, Mister Spiro, guns are dangerous. Especially the end with the hole.’

  ‘This isn’t over, Artemis Fowl,’ Spiro roared at the ceiling. ‘I will find you. I will never give up. You’ve got Jon Spiro’s word on it. My word!’

  He began to fire random shots, blowing holes in monitors, vents and conduits. One even came within a metre of Artemis.

  Pex and Chips were not quite sure what was going on, but decided that it might be a good idea to join in the fun. They pulled out their weapons and began shooting up the lab.

  Blunt did not get involved. He considered his employment contract terminated. There was no way out of this for Spiro — it was every man for himself. He crossed to the wall’s metal panelling and began to dismantle it with a power screwdriver. A section dropped from its casing, behind it a five-centimetre cable space, then solid concrete. They were trapped.

  Behind him, the lift door dinged.

  Juliet was crouched in the lift shaft.

  ‘We’re clear,’ said Holly in her earpiece. ‘But Spiro is shooting up the lab.’

  Juliet frowned. Her principal was in danger. ‘Knock them out with the Neutrino.’

  ‘I can’t. If Spiro is unconscious when the police arrive, he could claim a frame-up.’

  ‘OK. I’m going in.’

  ‘Negative. Wait for SWAT.’

  ‘No. You take out the weapons. I’ll handle the rest.’

  Mulch had given Juliet a bottle of dwarf rock polish. She poured a little puddle on the lift roof and it dissolved like fat on a pan. Juliet hopped into the carriage, crouching low in case Blunt decided to put a few rounds into the lift.

  ‘On three.’

  ‘Juliet.’

  ‘I’m going on three.’

  ‘OK.’

  Juliet reached up to the door-open button. ‘One.’ Holly drew her Neutrino, locking all four targets into her visor’s targeting system.

  ‘Two.’ She unshielded for accuracy, the vibration would throw her aim right off. For a few seconds she would have to hide behind the foil with Artemis.

  ‘Three.’

  Juliet pressed the button.

  Holly squeezed off four shots.

  Artemis had less than a minute to make his move. Less than a minute while Holly targeted and disarmed Spiro and Co. The circumstances were hardly ideal — screaming, gunfire and general mayhem. But then again, what better time to implement the final step in this stage of the plan? A very vital step.

  The second Holly unshielded to fire, Artemis scrolled out a perspex keyboard from the C Cube’s base and began to type. In seconds, he had hacked into Spiro’s bank accounts — all thirty-seven of them, in institutions from the Isle of Man to the Cavmans. The various account numbers locked into place. He had access to each secret fund.

  The Cube quickly ran a tot on the total funds: 2.8 billion US dollars, not counting the contents of various safety deposit boxes, which could not be touched over the Net. 2.8 billion dollars. Plenty to restore the Fowl’s status as one of the top five richest Irish families.

  Just as he was about to complete the transaction Artemis remembered his father’s words. His father, returned to him by the fairy folk. .

  . . And what about you, Arty? Will you make the journey with me?

  When the moment comes will you take your chance to be a hero?. .’

  Did he really need billions of dollars?

  Of course I need it. Aurum potestas est. Gold is power.

  Really? Will you take your chance to be a hero? To make a difference?

  Because he could not groan aloud, Artemis rolled his eyes and gritted his teeth. Well, if he was going to be a hero, he would be a well paid one. He quickly deducted a ten per cent finder’s fee from the 2.8 billion, then sent the rest to Amnesty International. He made the transaction irreversible, in case he weakened later on.

  Artemis wasn’t finished yet. There was one more good deed to be attended to. The success of this venture depended on Foaly being too busy watching the show to notice Artemis hacking into his system.

  He brought up the LEP site and set the code breaker working on a password. It took ten valuable seconds per character, but he was soon flying around LEP micro-sites. Artemis found what he needed on Perp

  Profiles. Mulch Diggums’s complete arrest record. From there, it was a simple matter to follow the electron trail back to the original search warrant for Mulch’s dwelling. Artemis changed the date on the warrant to read the day after Mulch’s arrest. This meant that all subsequent arrests and convictions were null and void. A good lawyer would have him out of prison in a heartbeat.

  ‘I have not finished with you yet, Mulch Diggums,’ he whispered,

  logging out and clipping the Cube on Holly’s belt.

  Juliet came through the door so fast her limbs were a blur. The jade ring trailed behind her like a fishing lure on the end of a line.

  Butler would never take chances like this, she knew. He would have some perfectly practical, safe plan — which was why he had his blue diamond tattoo and she didn’t. Well, maybe she didn’t want a tattoo.

  Maybe she wanted a life of her own.

  She quickly assessed the situation. Holly’s aim was true. The two gorillas were rubbing their scorched hands and Spiro was stamping his feet like a spoiled child. Only Blunt was on the floor, going for his gun.

  Even though the bodyguard was on his hands and knees, he was still almost at her eye level.

  ‘Aren’t you going to give me a chance to get up?’ he asked.

  ‘No,’ said Juliet, whipping the jade ring around like the stone that felled Goliath. It impacted on the bridge of Blunt’s nose, cracking it and effectively blinding him for a couple of minutes. Plenty of time for the

  Chicago Police to get down the shaft.

  Blunt was now out of the game. Juliet had expected to feel some satisfaction, but all she felt was sadness. There was no joy in violence.

  Pex and Chips felt they should do something. Perhaps disabling the girl would earn them a bonus from Mister Spiro? They circled Juliet, fists raised.

  Juliet wagged a finger at them. ‘Sorry, boys. You have to go to sleep.’

  The bodyguards ignored her, tightening the radius of their circle.

  ‘I said go to sleep.’

  Still no response.

  ‘You have to use exactly the words that I mesmerized them to respond to,’ said Holly in her ear.

  Juliet sighed. ‘If I must. OK, gentlemen; Barney says go to sleep.’

  Pex and Chips were snoring before they hit the ground.

  That just left Spiro, and he was too busy gibbering to be any threat.

  He was still gibbering when the SWAT team put the cuffs on him.

  ‘I’ll talk to you back at base,’ said the SWAT captain sternly to Juliet. ‘You’re a danger to your comrades and yourself.’

  ‘Yessir,’ said Juliet contritely. ‘I don’t know what came over me, sir.’

  She glanced upwards. A slight heat haze seemed to be drifting towards the lift shaft. The principal was safe.

  ***

  Holly holstered her weapon, buzzing up her shield.

  ‘Time to go,’ she said, the volume on her PA turned to minimum.

  Holly wrapped the cam foil tightly round Artemis, making certain no limbs were peeking out. It was imperative they leave while the lift was empty. Once forensics and the press got there, even a slight shimmer in the air might be caught on film.

  As they flew across the room, Spiro was being led from the lab. He had finally managed to calm down.

  ‘This is a set-up,’ he proclaimed in his best innocent voice. ‘My lawyers are gonna rip you guys apart.

  Artemis could not resist speaking as they floated past his ear.

  ‘Farewell, Jon,’ he whispered. ‘Never mess with a boy genius.’

  Spiro
howled at the ceiling like a demented wolf.

  Mulch was waiting across the street from the Phonetix lab, revving the van like a Grand Prix driver. He sat behind the wheel on an orange crate, with a short plank taped to his foot. The other end of the plank was taped to the accelerator.

  Juliet studied the system nervously. ‘Shouldn’t you untie that foot in case you need to use the brakes?

  ‘Brakes?’ laughed Mulch. ‘Why would I use the breaks? I’m not doing my driving test here.’

  In the back of the van, Artemis and Holly simultaneously reached for their seat belts.

  Chapter 11: The Invisible Man

  FOWL MANOR

  They reached Ireland without major incident, though Mulch did attempt to escape Holly’s custody fifteen times — including once on the Lear jet, where he was discovered in the bathroom with a parachute and a bottle of dwarf rock polish. Holly did not let him out of her sight after that.

  Butler was waiting for them at Fowl Manor’s front door.

  ‘Welcome back. Glad to see everyone’s alive. Now I need to go.’

  Artemis put a hand on his arm. ‘Old friend. You’re in no condition to go anywhere.’ Butler was determined. ‘One last mission, Artemis. I have no choice. Anyway, I’ve been doing Pilates. I feel much more limber.’

  ‘Blunt?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘But he’s in prison,’ protested Juliet. Butler shook his head.

  ‘Not any more.’ Artemis could see that his bodyguard was not about to be turned from his path.

  ‘At least take Holly. She can be of some help.’

  Butler winked at the elf. ‘I was counting on it.’

  The Chicago police had put Arno Blunt in a van, with a couple of officers. Two would be sufficient, they reasoned, as the perp was handcuffed and manacled. They revised this opinion when the van was discovered six miles south of Chicago, with the officers manacled and no sign of the suspect. To quote Sergeant Iggy Lebowski’s report: ‘The guy ripped those handcuffs apart as though they were links in a paperchain. He came at us like a steam train. We never had a chance.’