by Dan Kolbet
As the sun starts to set, everyone returns to their lawn chairs, everyone except the three of us. We're wearing a path into the grass circling the fields looking for Jane. Looking for closure. Looking to move on.
Then as the lights around school turn off for the fireworks show, we stop looking. The sky is instantly lit up with bright red, white and blue sparks exploding to the rhythm of patriotic music. So we watch the show and it's really quite good, but I can't focus on it. Neither can Frank or Aspen. We won't look for her again. This is a one-shot deal. One attempt. None of us wants to torture ourselves anymore.
So as the explosions in the sky above cast hints of color on the people below we scan the crowd for the last time.
Then I see her.
Standing by herself just in front of a cluster of trees. She's not watching the fireworks either, she's watching us.
Jane raises her hand as if to give a half-hearted wave. Not to say hello, but just to acknowledge that she too sees us. Just as soon as she raises it, she snaps it back down to her side and fidgets with her arms trying to find a comfortable way to hold her body in such an awkward situation.
I nudge Aspen and she sees her too. Frank follows our eyes as well. So here we are. The three of us and Jane, staring at each other across a sea of people under a kaleidoscope of colors, through years of pain, hurt and lies. Does she really recognize us? Does she know why we're here? I can't know that.
But I want her to know that we know about her. There is nothing that can make this right. Is it her fault, what she did? I don't know, but I don't want to feel like this anymore. I can't be a victim. None of us want to be.
So as the last firework flickers out and the music dies, I forgive her.
The lights on the school hum and then slowly turn on as Jane steps backward into the cluster of trees and disappears.
Frank and I hug Aspen as the firework-watchers gather their coolers and lawn chairs and head home.
* * *
I never saw Jane again after that night, but the envelopes kept coming. We all got them—Alex, Frank, Aspen, me and others. Over the years the addresses would change. Aspen would take it upon herself to meet the people her mom lived with or had relationships with, if she could find them. She'd tell them everything. Some understood, others just slammed the door in her face. Both reactions I understand.
I've moved on from wondering about Jane anymore, but support Aspen in any way that I can. There may come a day when Jane shows up here again. Maybe when Aspen has a child of her own. Or when Jane runs out of new lives to live. But I'm happy in my decisions—happy with Michelle, Landon and Gracie in our little house. Happy to see Kendall building a life of her own. Happy to see my crazy mother for Sunday dinners.
You only get so much family. Keep them close.
Acknowledgements
This book was nearly two years in the making. It's quite the understatement to say my life was a tad busy during these two years. Great things to be certain, but writing this story was never too far from my mind and I'm glad you were able to join me on this journey. Many of these characters meant a great deal to me and I was happy to tell their stories.
I'd like to thank Jill for encouraging me and for opening up my eyes to new ways of thinking and living. I love you for that.
Thank you to our children Joey, Kailyn, Allison, Felicity, Brooklyn and Cooper. Each of you, in your own way, helped shape these last two years and this story.
To Barbara, Brandi and Jessie, your notes were tremendously helpful. Thank you for suffering through the beta-proof stage and seeing the story amid all the chaos.
To Karen, your copy edits were perfect; my errors were not. Your story notes were spot on, made me laugh and kept me busy for quite some time.
To Joe, thank you for letting me ask you about Minnesota.
To Dana, thank you for poking holes in my book cover designs.
To Peta, thank you for your encouragement, friendship and making me feel like a million bucks at your book club events.
To everyone on my Facebook author page at www.facebook.com/DanKolbetBooks- thank you. I enjoy being able to toss out and idea or request a new character name and getting so many responses. This sort of interaction helps me a great deal and also gives you the chance to influence how my novels turn out. If you haven't yet liked the page, please do so you can get updates on what I'm working on next.
To the readers of this book. I hope you enjoyed the story. I honestly believe that you only get so much family. You need to keep them close to your heart. I'm thankful for mine.
About The Author
Dan Kolbet lives in Spokane, Washington with his wife and children. He is an independent author, former newspaper editor and reporter. He is currently working on his next story.
You can find Kolbet's blog at www.dankolbet.com or like his author page on Facebook www.facebook.com/DanKolbetBooks.
