Lessons Learned

by Amy Lynn Steele

  “And Book Girl’s heart and the baby,” Sean asked, “Is everything still normal?” There was unease around the corners of his eyes as he took Christina’s hand.

  “As far as they can tell, it is. They run tests every week and will do so until we go in for delivery.”

  “March twenty seventh can’t come soon enough,” Christina said as she took a sip of tea.

  No, it couldn’t. That is the day Doctor Johnson and Doctor Gilchrist decided would be best to deliver, about a week and a half before our baby was due, to make sure everything would stay under control. Allison and I would check into the hospital at six that morning for her scheduled cesarean. I took a drink of my mug of tea and sighed. For a moment I didn’t know if I should continue my daily routine of silently freaking out, or if I should try to relax knowing that for now everything was all right.

  I looked around our new home, which was just a few blocks away from the beach and only a mile from Sean and Christina. Upstairs Allison was comfortably sleeping and our baby was safe. Across from me were two of the people I loved most in the world and their son rested in the next room. Today was another victory for us and I needed to remember that. I needed to remember that at any second life could take a turn for the worse, so it was important to celebrate the good things as they happened. Tonight, I would find comfort in my lessons learned.

  “I’m sorry, dad,” Allison said into the phone the next morning. “Next time I will call you, but I knew everything was all right.” She was pacing the floor, but paused while she listened to what her dad had to say.

  Ali had slept peacefully last night, in fact more so than she had in weeks. When she woke up, I made us a big breakfast of scrambled eggs, toast and bacon. Robert called to see what tools he might need to bring to help us at the house today. He and Sean were going to help me paint the nursery and build the furniture. She mentioned her visit to the hospital last night and I could feel the tension through the phone line. Ali hung up and sighed.

  “Well, he isn’t happy with either of us right now.” She sat in the oversized chair she had claimed as her own, letting out another long sigh. “He gave me an earful, so you can expect the same.”

  I kissed her forehead. “I wouldn’t expect anything less from him.”

  Our new home was filled with family by a little after noon. The women stayed in the living room and kitchen so Ali wouldn’t have to be around the scent of paint and wouldn’t have to climb the stairs. Laura and my mom opened a bottle of chardonnay, while Ali and Christina looked at them wistfully. Mom had brought enough food to feed a hundred people, but Sean and I would make a decent dent in it all once the paint was on the walls.

  “So tell us about the nursery,” I could hear my mom ask Ali as I climbed up the stairs.

  Three of the four walls were to be painted a neutral light gray, and the fourth wall would be a dusty rose pink. The floor in the nursery was dark wood and we had off-white rugs covering parts of it. Robert brought the crib that Ali and I had picked and was going to assemble it today. It was also off white and looked like an old fashioned crib; three sides with thin rails and one side a padded headboard. Laura had found a faux mini crystal chandelier with pink beads that matched perfectly. We had a gray rocking chair with rose cushions custom made and were planning on placing it in the corner.

  Sean and Robert were already painting the walls with primer when I entered the room. On a drop cloth on the floor several cans of paint waited for us to crack them open. I knew I could have easily hired someone to do this for us, but I liked the idea of setting up my daughter’s room. It was one thing I could do to get ready for our little girl. Ali’s body was working so hard, but I would’ve done that for her too, if I could. But this, this I could do. We spent the first half of the afternoon painting, the other half building nursery items in one of the extra bedrooms. Looking at the freshly painted walls and half built nursery furniture made being a father real to me, now more than ever.

  “Son,” Robert began as we moved into an empty room to build the nursery furniture.

  Sean picked up his beer and looked between us, probably wondering if he should escape or be prepared for a fight.

  “I should have called you,” I admitted, hopefully taking the wind from his sails. “To be honest, my brain wasn’t functioning. All I could think about was getting Allison taken care of.”

  He studied my face for a long moment before responding. “I keep thinking that I will get used to not being the only person taking care of her, the only one putting her best interests first. But she has you and you love her almost as much as I do.”

  I let out a sharp laugh. “I will always do what’s best for her sir, she is my world.”

  Robert clapped his large hand on my shoulder. “I know she is, but she’ll never stop being mine either. I can’t look at her and not see my little girl.” A genuine smile spread over his face. “You’ll know how I feel all too soon, son. Having a little girl will be the best thing to ever happen to you.”

  “Your little girl is the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” I told him as I covered my heart with my hand.

  Robert looked almost choked up by my statement as he nodded. He didn’t say anything more, but you could tell he was lost in thought. Sean looked at me and mock wiped sweat from his forehead. We worked until dinner was ready and the three of us were famished, attempting to eat our weight in food. At some point in the day the girls had gone shopping and our living room was filled with bags. Everyone was laughing and talking about all of the exciting things coming up. I looked around the table, our first family meal in our new home. My mom was also looking around the table, a wistful look in her eyes. I tried to understand what brought that look on.

  She was the only one not paired up. I’d never known my mom to date, perhaps she had but had kept it a secret from me. Until this moment I thought she was happy with her company and her life, but she must be lonely. All these years it had been just her and I against the world and now she’s in that big house all by herself. Her eyes landed on me and a light blush touched her cheeks. She knew I could see what she was missing, companionship. I raised a glass in a silent toast across the table. She blinked and smiled, raising her glass and inclining her head slightly. Now more than ever I was thankful for taking my position in the family business.

  The next day Sean was back to help move all the furniture into place. Not long after he left I found Allison standing in the middle of the nursery looking around, her fingers lights skimming over the rail of the crib. Warm afternoon light peaked in through the gauzy cream curtains causing her dark hair to glow. She turned her head to look at me over her shoulder and smiled.

  “I love the way this room turned out,” her eyes dancing with unshed tears “Even better than I could have imagined it.” She turned to look at me. “I can’t believe that in less than six weeks we will get to bring our little girl home with us.”

  I crossed the room and placed a hand on her shoulder, moving her hair away from her neck. “I can’t wait, but I’m nervous.” I admitted as I pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin below her ear.

  “Me too,” she whispered and leaned into me.

  I wasn’t as nervous about being a dad as I thought I would be. I was nervous for Allison. I worried about the effect the labor process would have on her body and her heart. I couldn’t fathom the thought of something horrible happening to her. She had already been through enough. I watched my wife take in all the details of the nursery. Her slender arm reached for a book on a shelf, a smile tugging at her lips. There wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her or for our unborn child.

  I kissed her hair and kept my arm around her, unwilling to let her out of my reach. For a few minutes we stood in our daughter’s room and took it all in. From love we had made a life, a part of each of us merged to create a new little human. So many possibilities were before us, our future. One thing was certain and that was that we were in this together for the long haul. Allison was the other
half of my heart.

  Chapter Twenty Five

  Allison

  “Sometimes I just want to hate you,” I told Christina, who laughed and shook her head. “I know it’s your wedding day and I’m supposed to be fawning over you, but I’m as big as a house and you look like a runway model. You know what? I just decided I do, in fact, hate you.”

  “You look beautiful,” she lied. I huffed out a harsh laugh.

  I had woken up earlier in the day with unexpected energy despite the fact I had been up all through the night using the bathroom. I just couldn’t stop going! Christina spent the night at our house and I sent a reluctant Cooper to stay with Sean. I made us a big breakfast, but my stomach was filled with too many butterflies and too much baby to properly enjoy it. The stylist came over and pampered both of us, but I found it hard to sit still. At one point I had to get up and pace the floor to expel some of the pent up jitters. I didn’t know why I was so nervous, it wasn’t like I was the one getting married today.

  “You do look stunning,” Christina tried again as she sipped from a crystal flute of champagne. “You are glowing and you aren’t as big as you think you are. Embrace it.”

  Christina was wearing a custom made dress. It was a one shoulder fitted top covered in white, clear and silver beads. The waist had a full tulle skirt attached with a large satin bow for the ceremony and the skirt detached to reveal a cocktail style dress for the reception, making it easier for her to dance. Christina’s stomach was completely flat, making everyone doubt she ever had a baby. Her long legs ended in four inch silver heels. Her feet were up on the vanity table because she waited to put on the tulle skirt until the ceremony started.

  She had picked a dress for me that complimented my rather large pregnant belly. It was a deep plum halter dress with layers of light filmy fabric. It fell just below my knees in delicate waves. I had my hair styled into long wavy curls, where Christina’s hair was pinned up and looked like a 1920’s starlet. She had a delicate band of faux diamonds intertwined in her hair, giving her that flapper feel. Suddenly I felt almost dizzy and sat in the closest chair I could find. Christina had her back to me, so she didn’t notice my briefly distressed state.. Thank goodness. I didn’t want anything to distract from this special day.

  There was a quiet knock on the door before Christina’s mom entered. If it weren’t for the fine lines around Shannon’s eyes, they would have looked like they were sisters. She had flown in from New York for yesterday’s rehearsal dinner and would have to leave tonight. She runs a news station in New York City, so getting away was extremely difficult. In fact, this was only the second time she had seen her grandson.

  “Oh honey, you’re breathtaking.” Shannon covered her mouth with her hand. Christina smiled and thanked her.

  “Is dad here yet? It’s almost time.”

  Shannon’s dark green eyes didn’t show any distress. After years of putting out fires, she had grown accustomed to last-minute crisis. “No dear, he isn’t going to make it,” she responded. “He just called to say he was detained at his business meeting in Japan. He sent his apologizes and his love.”

  Christina shrugged, but didn’t looked ruffled. It was almost as if she expected it. “That’s fine, he can keep both. I will have the most important man in my life walk me down the aisle.”

  At that moment Cooper slid into the room holding a tux clad baby Joel. Joel had two teeth popping up from his bottom gums and drool clinging to his chin. His chubby pink cheeks made him look like a little angel as he reached for his mom. Christina gladly took him and started speaking to him in low hushed tones.

  “I was just talking about you,” she said. “You are going to go down the aisle with mama, yes you are.” She pressed a big kiss to his cheek and Joel squealed with delight.

  “Dear,” Shannon said taking a step forward. “You are going to smear your makeup.” Christina shot her mom a glance before pressing Joel’s cheek to her own.

  “I couldn’t care one bit,” she said and nestled her son into her chest. Tall, blonde and glamorous in her spectacular dress, it didn’t even look a fraction out of place for Christina to be holding her slobbery son. She oozed with happiness.

  Cooper looked at me and for a moment I thought he could see that I wasn’t feeling a hundred percent. Perhaps he had just been remembering our wedding day, as I had been doing all day. He blinked a few times then smiled, winking at me before turning to Christina.

  “Wow Christina, you look amazing. Sean is going to fall over when he sees you.”

  She lightly pushed his shoulder. “Stop flirting with me Cooper Ryan Perez, I’m about to be a married woman.”

  Cooper took Joel so I could help Christina get her skirt into place. I moved slower than normal, but masked my discomfort behind a large smile. My stomach felt tight and for a moment it was a struggle to take a deep breath. It had to be this strapless bra I was wearing. What a stupid idea that was, I thought to myself. It’s too tight on me. That has to be it. Once Christina’s skirt was on she looked like she had just stepped from the pages of a bridal magazine, the bottom of her cocktail dress hidden under layers of tulle. Her waist looked extremely narrow above the billowing skirt.

  I took a moment to adjust my bra and took a deep breath. Oxygen filled my deprived lungs and I gulped it in. Yes, that was all it was, dumb bra. Sometime during all of this, Shannon had snuck out of the room. Christina looked in the mirror one last time and a huge smile spread over her face. Today is the day she had dreamt about.

  “I can’t believe today is really happening,” she breathed, her eyes alight with excitement. “Let’s go get married,” she said as she took Joel back into her arms.

  The small church was full and buzzing with excitement. I scanned the crowd and was happy to see Cami, Sean’s surprise sister. He had introduced her and Christina a couple weeks ago and Christina immediately invited her to the wedding. She looks a little like Sean, similar hair and eye color. Today her brown hair was in perfect curls and she was wearing a tight black dress. She was a stunning woman and I was glad that Sean had found some dependable family to share this day with.

  Cooper and I started walking down the aisle together. Sean was at the front of the small church and looked nervous. His sandy blonde hair was combed perfectly and he looked amazingly handsome in his tux. He kept shaking his hands and looking back down the aisle. The wedding march started and I knew. Christina had long imagined herself walking toward Sean to Wagner’s familiar melody as she descended. Joel shrieked with happiness when he saw his dad and laughter bubbled up from the guests. Sean’s eyes were glued to Christina and all his nervousness vanished once he could see her walking toward him.

  “Kitten, you look beautiful,” he whispered when she was finally standing next to him.

  Christina turned into a perfect blushing bride at his words. She handed her bouquet of mixed white flowers to me and Coop took Joel, who was happily sucking on his fist. The ceremony was pretty traditional for Sean and Christina. I couldn’t help but cry as they repeated the provided vows.

  Christina’s emerald eyes glittered with tears when she said “I do.”

  When Sean was asked the same question he answered as only Sean would. “Hell yes I do.”

  The minister pronounced them husband and wife. Sean took Christina gently in his arms and pulled her into a kiss. It wasn’t chaste, but it wasn’t inappropriate either. Shouts and cheers erupted from the guests and Joel tried to clap his hands as he laughed at his parents.

  A sharp pain radiated over my stomach and I flinched trying to keep it hidden. Christina turned to take her bouquet from me as Sean grabbed Joel from Coop. For a moment she stared at me and I knew she could see though my effort to hide the pain. Before she could say or do anything, Sean had her by the arm and they were walking down the aisle hand in hand. Christina glanced over her shoulder for a second to evaluate me, too far away to say or do anything.

  Cooper touched my arm and I turned toward him. I must not be
hiding the pain as well as I thought because he instantly took my face in his hands.

  “Tell me what it is,” he urged.

  “Let’s get out of here first, people are starting to look at us and this is Sean and Christina’s special day.”

  “I don’t give a shit about who is looking at us. I only care about you.” I pulled on his hand but he didn’t budge.

  Suddenly everything started falling into place, all the random pieces of the puzzle started making sense; why I had extra energy today and pain a few hours later. I hadn’t almost wet the bed last night, as I suspected. Instead, my water had broken. It just hadn’t been a gusher like it had been for Christina. It was more like a trickle. And it happened all through the night, so I thought I was just going to the bathroom. I blinked a few times and realized Cooper had been talking to me and now my dad and Laura were by my side. Somehow I was sitting on the front pew. I could see Sean and Christina trying to get back to us.

  “I’m in labor,” I mumbled in shock. “It’s too early, but she’s coming now.”

  Cooper’s bright blue eyes widened before rolling back into his head. He crumbled to the floor in a heap.

  “Cooper!” someone screamed. Oh wait, that was me screaming. Then I found myself screaming again as a contraction shook me to my core.

  “Ali I need you to focus,” Laura put her face directly in front of mine. “Take a deep breath in and let it out. You are fine, Cooper is fine and your baby is all right.”

  “Cooper,” I whimpered.

  “Your dad has him, he fainted and hit his head, but he’s fine.” Laura told me calmly. “I need you to focus on breathing and staying calm. An ambulance is on its way and I have messages in for Doctor Johnson and Doctor Gilchrist. Breath.”