Back to the Drawing Board

by L. L. Collins

  “You must fill us in on this hottie.” My friends Bailey and Jennie sat forward, both of their gazes switching from me, to Carter, and back again. “When he walked in with you, I almost fell off my stool.”

  I laughed. I’d seen the looks on their faces when he shook their hands.

  “I’d say I claim him, but I think that claim’s already been made,” Bailey said, wiggling her eyebrows.

  “Definitely,” Jennie said. “Now spill it. We’ve known you a long time, Jules, and we haven’t seen this look on your face before.”

  “Carter is her new intern,” Tracey said, fanning her face with her hand.

  Bailey and Jennie’s eyes both widened. “Reallllly,” Bailey said. “Isn’t that interesting.”

  “You can tell them all about that in a minute. Tell me how today went,” Tracey said.

  I looked over at Carter again, who caught my eye and waved. He was apparently killing the game of pool because Ethan was slapping him on the back. The few guys Tracey had invited all cheered. Carter made friends so easily.

  “Carter volunteered with me at Colorado Cares,” I explained to Bailey and Jennie. “Colby put us on the Williamson’s house, that family I told you about. We met with the family and then we started painting. Carter connected with the little boy of the family and decided to work on his room.”

  “Get to the good stuff, because I know there’s more than that,” Tracey interrupted.

  “Patience,” I laughed. “He came in while I was painting and scared me to death. I was . . . uh . . . dancing to my phone. Carrie Underwood. After that, we had a moment . . .”

  “You kissed?”

  “You could say that,” I said, my face flaming again. I thought about the car scene just an hour ago, right outside this restaurant.

  “Uh oh, she just went into la-la land again,” Tracey said. “Girl, spill it.”

  I leaned over so all three girls could hear me. “He wants to come home with me tonight. I asked him.”

  They all gasped, and Tracey sat back, her arms crossed in front of her. “Julia . . .”

  “I know, I know,” I said, holding up my hands. “I know what you said, Tracey. I also know what happened between us today was huge. I can’t get into everything, because he finally divulged some important information to me. I get it, Trace. I’m getting through to him, though.”

  “God, it sounds so romantic,” Bailey sighed. “I want a Carter.”

  “Me too,” Jennie said.

  “Just be careful,” Tracey said. “You know I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  The girls nodded in agreement. “I know. I think I know what I’m doing. We’ll see after tonight.”

  “Hey Jules!” We all turned to see Colby behind us with his brother Isaac. What were the odds?

  “Colby! Hi! You remember Tracey, Bailey, and Jennie, right?”

  Colby slid in next to me, and Isaac next to Tracey. Isaac was a few years older than us and just as good looking as Colby. He looked like he had his eye on Tracey.

  “Yes! You guys remember my brother, Isaac? He’s the ugly one.” We all laughed, and Colby slung his arm across my shoulders. Isaac was far from ugly.

  “How did it go? You guys make good progress? I didn’t get back there after lunch.”

  “Yes, I finished the Master, and Carter finished Garrett’s room except for the decals. Another day of painting and it should be done.”

  “Super. Can I get you a drink?”

  “Sure! I’ll have a margarita.”

  Colby signaled the waitress and ordered a round for our table. “You guys don’t mind us crashing with you, do you? It’s busy in here tonight.” The lights dimmed, and the music was turned up, making it harder for us to hear. Some people headed to the small dance floor, their bodies moving to the thumping beat.

  “Not at all!” I shouted. “The more, the merrier. The guys are over there playing pool.”

  Colby turned and looked across the room, his face changing into a look I didn’t recognize.

  “You okay?”

  “Great,” he said, tightening his arm on my shoulders. He put his lips close to my ear so I could hear. “You look wonderful tonight, Julia. Well, that’s every day. Even with paint all over you.”

  I smiled, not sure how to answer him. Colby had always been flirtatious with me, but that’s as far as it went. I kind of saw him as a brother, even if he was hot. “Thank you, Colby.”

  “Will you go out with me tomorrow night? Let me take you to dinner.” Before I could respond, I felt a tug at my hand. Turning my head, I saw Carter standing next to the table, his hand on mine. He looked . . . angry.

  “Let’s dance,” Carter said, looking over me at Colby. He removed his arm from around my shoulders and I stood up, looking back at the girls. They were all laughing, but I wasn’t sure what had just happened.

  We reached the makeshift dance floor and Carter wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me close as the song changed to something slower.

  “I thought you were playing pool,” I said. My hands rested on his biceps as we swayed, and I loved feeling them flex as he held onto me.

  “Not anymore.”

  “I learned something new about you tonight. Well, two new things.”

  “What’s that?”

  “One, you’re good at pool. Two, that you like to dance.”

  “I don’t like to dance,” he admitted.

  “Then what are we doing out here?”

  “I wanted to dance with you.”

  Well, I couldn’t argue with that.

  “I like this song.” Carter pulled me closer. I tried not to read too much into the fact that we were dancing to a love song, and he said he liked it. “Is it bad that Ethan is here and I shouldn’t be touching you, but I want to kiss you something fierce right now?”

  I looked over my shoulder at Ethan, still playing pool with the guys. “He’s busy. Plus, Ethan is cool. He wouldn’t cause any trouble.”

  “Does he want you, too?”

  I laughed. “Not everyone wants me, Carter.”

  “Yes, they do. I’m a man. I know how we think.”

  “Do you? Well, the only one I want is you. So there.”

  “Colby wants you.”

  Realization dawned on me. That’s what this was about. I stepped back, forcing his arms to drop. It was all falling into place; the way Carter had acted at the Williamson’s house and now. “What’s wrong?”

  “Is that what this is, Carter? Some sort of pissing contest between you and Colby? You didn’t come get me because you wanted to dance with me. You wanted to get me away from him! Right?” When he didn’t answer, I turned and walked away. On one hand, it was hot that he was jealous of Colby. But on the other hand, it was ridiculous. I fought for him to admit he had feelings for me for weeks, and this was what made him act this way? Colby?

  I bypassed our table, where Tracey eyed me warily as I kept walking towards the restroom. I just needed a minute. Today had been amazing, and we’d made so much progress. But it seemed like the whole reason behind that was jealousy. That had probably been the reason Colby asked me out tonight too, because he’d never crossed that line before, either.

  I shut the door to the one stall bathroom and leaned against it, willing my heart to stop racing. What was I doing? Carter was obviously not in any place to be in a relationship with me, but my stupid heart didn’t seem to care what his reason was for wanting to be with me now. Colby. That figured.

  After calming my racing heart and shaking hands, I stood in front of the bathroom mirror. What was it that made Carter so much more appealing than Colby? Or Ethan? Or anyone? I’d thought I’d loved Scott back in the day, but even he never made me feel like this.

  I reapplied my lip gloss and fluffed my hair. I needed a game plan. Colby was still here, and Carter now knew I was angry. What did I want to happen? Did I want to leave, or did I want to pat the egos of these two men?

  Sighing, I opened the door to the bathroom and s
tepped out, my eyes trying to adjust to the dimness of the lights. I took another step when I found myself being pulled farther into the hallway. I fought to push the person off, but it didn’t work. Just when I was about to scream, I felt him against me.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered into my ear. The beat of the music pulsed inside me, and his words made me feel drunk. “I’m crazy over you. This is a new feeling for me. I didn’t like the way he looked at you today. You aren’t a prize to be won, Julia. I know that. But to me, you’re the ultimate prize. I can’t promise I won’t hurt your feelings along this path, or that I know what I’m doing here.”

  Tears flooded my eyes, and I was glad it was dark and he couldn’t see me. Carter had just said the exact words Johnny had told me, and he’d had no way of knowing. “Carter,” I said, my throat thick. I reached up and touched his face, my eyes adjusting to the darkness.

  “God,” he moaned. “I made you cry? I’m an asshole.” Carter stepped back and ran his hands through his hair. “You deserve so much more than me, Julia. You’re the real deal; the whole package. I’m nothing but a mess.”

  It was my turn now. “Carter. Stop. I’ll explain everything later about why I was crying, but not now.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and pressed my face against his broad chest. I loved the way he smelled.

  He lifted me and pressed me against the wall so our faces were level. Just as he was about to crush his lips to mine, I took the initiative and closed the space between us. I poured every bit of anger, frustration and lust I had for this man into my kiss. He responded immediately, opening his mouth and entwining his tongue with mine. His fingers traced the inside of my thighs, sending electric shocks through my body. Just when I was about to beg for him to touch me, I heard a whistle from behind us.

  “Well, well, well, what do we have here?” It was Tracey. “I come to look for you and this is what I see. Why don’t you guys head home? I’m going to hang out with the group for awhile, but it kinda looks like you want to be alone.” She giggled, and I couldn’t help but laugh as I rested my head on Carter’s chest. We were acting like teenagers.

  “No,” I said, stepping back and smoothing my clothes down. “Come on, Carter. Let’s go enjoy the group. You said yourself you wanted to meet new people.”

  “Right now, all I want is to meet you,” Carter said under his breath, and I was pretty sure I knew what he meant by ‘meet.’

  “It was a great night.” I hugged my friends goodbye. It was late, but Carter’s fingers were laced with mine, a promise that we weren’t over. After we’d gone back to the table, I’d politely turned down Colby, and it had been obvious since then that Carter and I were seeing each other. Wait . . . were we seeing each other? We hadn’t said so, but it sure felt like it.

  I didn’t want to think about work tonight, or my parents, or the obstacles we had to overcome. I just wanted to explore this new and amazing feeling of being transparent with Carter.

  “It was great to finally meet you,” Tracey said, hugging Carter. She looked over at me. “Take care of her. I’ve been her best friend our whole lives, and I will kick some ass.”

  Carter laughed. “I’m glad she has such great friends. It was great being with all of you tonight. We’ll have to do it again soon.” With that, he pulled me across the street to his car, a definite quickness in his step. His eyes followed my legs as I slid into the seat, but he didn’t say a word.

  He got in quickly and revved the engine, putting his hand on my bare thigh. “Someday,” he said, “I have something I want to do in this car.”

  He didn’t have to tell me what he was thinking. It was all over his face. I loved this new side of him.

  “Let’s play the game again,” he said. “I need a distraction until we get to your place.”

  “Three more questions?”

  “Sure,” he said. “You start.”

  “What do you want to do to me in this car?”

  He laughed, slamming his hand on the steering wheel. “You are something else, girl! Okay, okay. I want to pull you over onto my lap, lift that skirt, and show you just how hot it can be to have sex in this car.”

  I squirmed, wanting nothing more than to let him live out his fantasy. Hey, I’d asked. I was glad it was dark because I knew I was as red as his car.

  “Next one is, have you ever had a serious girlfriend?”

  “No,” he said immediately. “I’ve always been a serious student. When I was in high school, I wanted nothing to do with the drama girls caused. Then when I went away to college, I got in the car accident, and my life kind of fell apart for awhile, so I’ve just never had any interest.”

  “But you aren’t . . . a virgin?” I practically whispered it. This time he roared with laughter.

  “Julia,” he coughed. “You have no problem with the hard questions, do you? No. Not at all. I said I haven’t had a girlfriend. I didn’t say I’d been celibate or anything. I am a man, after all.”

  I was relieved. Not that it would’ve changed how much I wanted him, but it might’ve freaked me out just a little. “Your turn,” I said. I was afraid now what he would ask.

  I directed him to a parking space at my apartment building, and we both stepped out into the cool Denver air. He slung his arm around my shoulders as we headed to the door. I hit the button for the elevator, and he surprised me by kissing me gently, his tongue just touching mine before he pulled away. Desire crackled between us like static electricity. I’d never wanted anyone more in my life.

  “You didn’t ask a question,” I whispered.

  “Where do you want me to touch you first?” Carter asked against my lips, just as the elevator dinged open. He stepped us through the doors and I hit the third floor.

  “Everywhere,” I answered honestly.

  “Cheater,” he teased.

  “What do you like best in a lover?”

  It was my turn to cough, and he laughed. “Hey, I learned from the best. This was your idea.”

  “I’ve never had a lover like you, so I’m not sure,” I admitted.

  “What does that mean?”

  “I just have the feeling you’re going to be unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.”

  Carter smirked. “Is that so?”

  I nodded. “I think I’d like you to be whatever kind of lover you’d like. I enjoy seeing the sweet side of you, but the raw, edgy part of you is a complete turn on, too.”

  “One more question,” he said, backing me into the corner as the elevator settled at the third floor and the doors opened. “How important is sleep to you?”

  “Tonight? Not at all. On a regular basis, very important.”

  “I like that answer,” he said, following me the short distance to my door. “These games are fun. Do you have any other ones?”

  “I’m full of games,” I opened the door and he breezed past me. “But no more games tonight, Carter.” I walked into the kitchen so I could put my purse down, leaving him in the living room.

  I braced my hands on the kitchen counter, steeling my frazzled nerves at what it seemed was about to happen. When I finally felt calm enough to go out and face this man that I so boldly invited to my home tonight, I saw Carter was holding a framed photo of Johnny and me. Shit.

  “Who is this?”

  JULIA’S FACE WENT WHITE, AND I knew I’d struck a nerve. She looked very chummy with this guy, whoever he was. And he must’ve been important to her because his photo was front and center on her mantle. She walked over, taking the frame and putting it face down on the table.

  “No one,” she mumbled, turning her back on me and walking back to the kitchen. She wasn’t quick enough, though, because I caught her wiping away the tear she tried to contain. Whoever he was, I already hated him for making her cry. And if we weren’t going to have any secrets with each other, she was going to tell me more than ‘no one.’

  “Julia,” I said, as I picked the frame back up and followed her into the kitchen. It was decked out in modern ap
pliances and fixtures. Her apartment was gorgeously decorated, as I expected. I wanted to hear more about her dream of being an interior designer, also. “This isn’t no one if his picture is on your mantle. Is he an ex-boyfriend?”

  She made a strange sound, something halfway between a sob and a laugh. When I saw her hand shake as she rummaged through a drawer, I knew she was upset. She placed a bottle opener beside a bottle of wine she’d already set on the counter. Another thing I was learning about Julia: when she was distraught, she drank. We weren’t going down that road again.

  “Julia, meet me halfway here,” I said, coming up behind her and putting my hands on her shoulders. “Talk to me. I’m here for you, just like you were for me. Talk to me. Let it out. Help me understand.”

  Her body shook, and I felt helpless. I didn’t like the feeling. I wanted to fix it. I wrapped my arms around her, turning her to face me as tears streamed down her face. She leaned into my chest as her body shuddered. Gone was our sexual tension. I needed to help her. I wanted her to open up to me, and that surprised me. It was a foreign feeling, but I actually welcomed it.

  “He’s my brother,” she said finally, her voice breaking.

  Relief flooded through me. He wasn’t some guy she was hung up on; that would be hard to compete with. “Where is he?”

  She looked up at me, her tear stained face making my heart clutch. This woman was so heartbreakingly beautiful; her big eyes rimmed in red as tears continued their path down her cheeks. I used my thumbs to catch the stray ones that didn’t soak into her flawless skin, waiting for her answer.

  “Let’s go sit down,” I said, and she nodded. We walked into the living room and she settled against me on the plush couch. It had me feeling all sorts of things I wasn’t sure I was ready for. But hell if I was going anywhere now.

  “He’s in prison,” she said.

  Wow. That wasn’t at all what I thought she was going to say. “Oh, Julia. I’m so sorry.”