Starshine

by Melody Winter

  “Yes. I never quite understood why he kept that room as he did.”

  “Memories, Ella. There were some good memories with Amy for him as well as all the hurt. She was quite a lovely girl initially, but soon changed when all the fame went to her head. She had quite a sad childhood, you know?”

  “It’s a strange thing, childhood. There are so many ways of looking at it,” I said, drifting into my own memories.

  Hazel cocked her head to the side. “That’s quite true, Ella. Things happen that we can’t control when we’re children. Amy’s father was a gambler, and a womaniser. How do you deal with that when you’re a child? There’s no wonder she turned out like she did.”

  There was sympathy in Hazel’s voice, and I looked to the floor, struggling to control my building resentment. I tried to stay quiet as she continued.

  “No child would ever be able to come through all that unscathed. I feel quite sorry for her. She had it hard. How many other children do you know that had to cope with the things that she did?”

  I closed my eyes, reigning in my anger. “I know one,” I said through gritted teeth. “And I think she turned out all right.”

  “Well, she must be a very strong character then. Is she a friend of yours?”

  “No, Hazel,” I said, lifting my face to look at her. I drew in a deep breath. I wasn’t ashamed. It was all in my past. “It’s me. My father sounds very similar to Amy’s.”

  “Oh, Ella! I’m so sorry. I never knew. No one told me.”

  “That’s because I’ve not told anyone.”

  “Not even Alex?”

  “No. The topic has never come up. It’s not the easiest of things to slip into a conversation, is it?”

  My anger dissipating as Hazel’s shocked expression faded. Unfortunately, it changed to one of sympathy. That was the reason I never mentioned either of my parents. The sympathetic gazes from people who never knew me irritated me beyond belief. They had no idea at all how my father had behaved, or how my mother responded to his actions. Now that I’d discovered that Amy had possibly experienced a similar childhood with her father, I hated her even more. Surely, she’d have seen the hurt and upset that his philandering ways caused. How could she act the same way with Alex? It made her the lowest of the low in my opinion.

  Hazel continued staring at me as if waiting for me to speak. I didn’t say anything, I didn’t owe her an explanation.

  Eventually she broke the silence. “You should tell Alex. He’ll want to know all this.”

  The kitchen door swung open and Alex looked first to me and then his mother. He was dressed, but looked sexier than before. The blue of his t-shirt accentuated the colour of his eyes, and the black jeans elongated his legs and slim hips.

  “What’s taking so long? And what should you tell me, Ella?”

  I sighed, trying to block out the inevitable reaction.

  “I’ll leave you two to talk,” Hazel said quietly.

  I was now forced into a corner and would have to explain everything to Alex. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to tell him, I just didn’t see the need to give him all the information right now. It could have waited.

  I turned to Hazel. “It’s okay. You’ve no need to leave.” I’d tell Alex later, not now. My attention turned to Alex. “I’ll have a chat with you later. It’s nothing important.”

  Alex narrowed his eyes. “You sure?”

  I nodded.

  “Mum?” he questioned, not convinced by my response.

  “What? Ella and I were just talking. Now, let’s take these coffees through and eat these croissants. I’m starving.”

  Hazel placed everything on a tray before walking out of the kitchen. I started to follow her, but Alex grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

  “Ella, what was all that about?” he asked, softly.

  “Nothing to worry about,” I whispered. “I’ll tell you later.”

  “Has my mum upset you?”

  I shook my head. “No, it was nothing.”

  He cocked his head to the side. “Tell me now, please?”

  I sighed, exasperated with his insistence, and to some degree his mother’s interference.

  “Your mum mentioned Amy’s childhood, that’s all. I’m afraid it didn’t rouse my sympathy for her.”

  Alex frowned. “And that’s it?”

  “No, not all of it.” I focused to the floor, unable to meet his inquiring eyes. I had no idea why I always reacted like this when I mentioned my parents. Perhaps, I was ashamed by them and their behaviour, even now, after all these years.

  “They’re waiting for us,” I said, waving my arm toward the kitchen door and my escape.

  “Oh no, fuck going through into the room with them. They can wait. I want to know what’s upset you. Don’t try to pretend that you’re okay, Ella. I can tell you’re not. What else was said?”

  “It’s about my parents. It’s no big deal. Look, do we have to do this now?” I asked, forcing myself to look at him.

  He nodded, lifting me under my arms and placing me on the work surface. He stood in between my legs and kissed my forehead. “Speak.”

  “My dad sounds very much like Amy’s. He slept with numerous women, gambled all his money, smoked and drunk his way through evenings and days when he wasn’t working. In fact, I think he must have turned up drunk at work more than he did sober. It’s a miracle he wasn’t ever fired.”

  Alex pulled my head against his. “I did wonder why you never mentioned your parents.”

  “I would have told you, but it just didn’t seem important. Your mum thought otherwise though. I’m afraid she didn’t understand my reaction to Amy’s situation. I don’t have any sympathy for her. Not when she’s behaving just like her father.”

  “Well, it seems you broke the mould with yours. Or is this your way of telling me that you’re sleeping with lots of other men, secretly drinking when I’m not around and gambling all your money on line?”

  I punched his arm. “No!” I was pleasantly surprised by his reaction. There was no immediate sympathy, just a willingness to understand. “Do you want to know more?” I asked cautiously.

  “Only if you want to tell me. I mean, I am curious as to where your parents are now?” He rubbed the top of my arms with his hands.

  “My mum’s in France, living with another woman called Maree.”

  “Fuck me, your mother is a lesbian?”

  I raised my eyes heavenwards. “Yes, it seems that my father put her right off men.”

  Alex leaned backward, dipping his head. “And your dad?”

  “He died from liver failure just before my eighteenth birthday.”

  “Shit, Ella, I’m sorry.”

  I shrugged. “Why? If his liver hadn’t packed in, then I think the loan sharks would have finished him off when they’d caught up with him. He owed thousands.”

  Alex kissed my lips. “What happened to his debt when he died? Don’t those types of people still want paying?”

  I nodded. “My mum wasn’t stupid. She must have taken out an insurance policy or something. She managed to pay them all off when he died, and then ran off to France with her secret lover. Apparently, she’d been with Maree for years. It seems my father wasn’t the only one looking for fun outside his marriage.”

  “Good grief. Are you sure you’re nothing like them?”

  “Behave.” I managed a slight smile at his comment. “I’m nothing like either of them. It wasn’t great being abandoned at seventeen and left to fend for myself. Not only had my mother just buried my father, but she skipped the country with her lover the day after his funeral.”

  “Fuck, Ella. That’s crazy.”

  “Well, there’s no wonder I’m crazy, is there?”

  Alex hugged me. “I’ve told you before. You’re crazy, but you’re all mine. I happen to like your craziness, and I wouldn’t have you any other way.”

  The next hour went surprisingly quick. I was relieved that there were no awkward silences between Hazel
and myself after what we’d discussed in the kitchen. She seemed happy that Alex and I were together. I noted how she observed every little movement he made toward me as we sat on the sofa. His hand was either on my knee, or holding mine. He kissed my cheek at one point, and she positively beamed.

  When they eventually left, Alex leaned back against the door.

  “I thought they’d never leave,” he said as I carried the empty mugs and plates back into the kitchen. He followed me.

  “I think Charlie’s stories will keep us laughing for days,” I said.

  Alex wrapped his arms around me from behind. “They really like you.”

  “Well, of course they do. What’s not to like?”

  He kissed the back of my head, squeezing me in his arms. “We need to leave in a couple of hours. I’ll order us a car. Do you want to go out for drinks and a meal straight after, or come back and get changed before-hand?”

  Today wasn’t going to go down in history as one of my favourites. I’d not forgotten about the meeting this afternoon, but I’d managed to push it to the back of my mind whilst Alex’s parents were here.

  “I’m not bothered. But perhaps we should go out straight afterwards. If we come back here, we’ll never leave.”

  He nuzzled the back of my neck, moaning his agreement. “We could eat early, then we’ll not get back too late.”

  “We can just come back and not go out again if you’d prefer.”

  “No. Tonight I am taking you out. I promised.”

  I was just about to turn in his arms and kiss him when the doorbell rang.

  “That’ll be Hazel,” he said. “She’ll have forgotten something. Can you answer it? I’ll go and have a look in the room to see if I can see anything of hers?”

  “Sure.”

  I headed to the front door, opening it wide, expecting Hazel and Charlie to be on the door step.

  But it wasn’t them. It was Amy.

  I didn’t know who was the most shocked to see who—her to see me answering Alex’s front door, or me to see her on the door step. Even though I hated her, I didn’t slam the door in her face. The paps were already taking numerous photographs of our doorstep exchange.

  “I want to see Alex,” she hissed.

  “You’d better come in then,” I replied, stepping aside so she could enter the house. She pushed past me and waited for me to shut the door.

  “So, you worked your way into his bed, now his house? She snarled. “What’s next? What more do you want from him?”

  I ignored her comment, pointing to the living room where Alex was. “He’s in there, if you want to see him.”

  She smirked, as if all her birthdays had come at once, and something inside me snapped. As she marched toward the door I grabbed her arm.

  “If you say one nasty word, I will not be responsible for my actions.”

  “What I have to say to Alex is of no concern to you.”

  I gripped her arm even tighter. “But it is. You see, what you don’t seem to realise is that we are together. We are a team. I won’t watch you try to destroy him with your pathetic lies and sob stories. He doesn’t want you, Amy.”

  She tried to shake my hand off her, but I still didn’t release my grip.

  “I should have had you fired when you attacked me in the studio the other week,” she sneered.

  “I didn’t attack you. You know I didn’t.”

  “I know what you did. I know what you’re doing. This work experience of yours was all just a plan to get onto the set and try to steal Alex from me as well as my career.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “Look at the evidence. You slept with him within days of meeting him, and then insisted on acting out the sex scene with him. My sex scene!”

  “You seriously need to see a shrink,” I replied, unable to hide the contempt in my voice.

  The room door opened, and Alex strode into the hall.

  “Amy!” he exclaimed. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

  As soon as Alex appeared Amy started crying. “She’s hurting me.” She pulled at my hand that was still tightly wrapped around her wrist. As soon as I released my hold on her, she ran to Alex, throwing herself into his arms. He pushed her away.

  “Alex, I need to talk to you.” She sobbed as she spoke, and I found myself silently congratulating her on what a good actress she was. “Why have you cleared my room out? That bitch sister of yours had all my things delivered to me the other day. Boxes and boxes of it.”

  “It’s not your room anymore,” Alex said. “I wanted you out of my life once and for all. I should have done it years ago.”

  “Is she moving in there?” Her gaze snapped to me.

  “No.” Alex said. “Ella sleeps with me every night.”

  She seemed momentarily stunned, but recovered quickly. “I want to talk to you alone.”

  “Whatever you need to say, you can say in front of Ella,” he said, nodding toward me.

  She narrowed her eyes before turning back to Alex.

  A new flood of tears started, and I clenched my hands into fists, trying desperately not to lose my temper with her.

  Her whiney voice continued. “I need you to talk to the Starshine bosses. You have to convince them that I’ll play Evelyn in the last film.”

  “No,” Alex said.

  “Why won’t you do it? Is it because of her?” She inclined her head toward me.

  Alex pulled his hand through his hair. “I told you I’d never work with you again. I’m not going to try and convince anyone of anything different.”

  “But we are good together. It’s what the fans want. Even now, they want us to get back together in real life. I’ve seen their tweets. I know the public. She is nothing but a fling. You know I’ll take you back. You only have to ask.”

  “Ella is not a fling!” Alex shouted, making me jump. “I love her.”

  “Love?” Her pathetic act abruptly stopped. Here was the real Amy, spitting out her vile and angry remarks. “What do you know about love? You said you loved me, and look how you treated me.”

  Alex lifted his hand to the bridge of his nose and pinched it between his fingers. I hated the way she made him feel guilty about things when he had never done anything wrong.

  “I so wish that this baby had been yours. I’d not have got rid of it. It would have all been so different.”

  Alex’s Adam’s apple rose and fell. His eyes glistened before he closed them. Memories of the baby she had got rid of, the one he had thought was his, still hurt. And she knew it was the perfect way to get to him.

  She had to go.

  “Amy. You need to leave. Now,” I said slowly and calmly. If she didn’t go, I would throw her out.

  “It’s not your house. If Alex wants me to leave, then I will.”

  I willed Alex to speak out, but he was already crumbling inside—memories of what she had done were back in his head.

  Amy took advantage of his emotional state by moving closer and wrapping her arms around his middle. He stepped backward, but she moved with him. When he caught my gaze with his own I knew I had to do something. It was all too much for him. He didn’t want to fight with her.

  But I did, and I would.

  “Amy!” I shouted. “Leave!”

  She rested her head against Alex’s chest.

  I stepped across the hall purposely, making my way to grab her and then throw her out of the house, but she twisted away from me. At least she let go of Alex to move out of reach.

  I reached for her shoulder, and pulled her toward me, intending to head to the door.

  I didn’t expect her to fight.

  She screamed, her hands flying to my face. A stinging pain charged across my cheek as she clawed at me with both hands.

  “I’ll kill you!” she shrieked. “I swear I’ll kill you!”

  I’d had more than enough, and without any preconceived thought about what I was doing I curled my hand into a fist and threw a punch at her face. The patheti
c sound of flesh hitting flesh sounded out before she staggered backward against the wall.

  I stood over her crouched figure. “Get out!” I yelled. “Get your filthy scummy ass out of here, now. And don’t ever come back!”

  I grabbed her under her arm, and pulled her to her feet. Alex was already at the door, opening it as I dragged her toward it. I practically threw her outside, not caring that the reporters and photographers were going mental, shouting out both our names.

  “And don’t ever come back!” I yelled, slamming the door shut.

  I breathed deeply before turning to look at Alex.

  “Are you okay?” I asked, rushing toward him. I took his face in both of my hands, looked into his eyes and kissed him. He responded willing, like he always did, and when we broke apart his former hurt expression had disappeared.

  “I’m not imagining any of this, am I?” he said.

  I shook my head.

  “You actually punched her?”

  I nodded.”

  “Fuck, Ella! That’ll be all over the papers.”

  “I don’t care. I actually think quite a few people will love that we chucked her out the way we did.”

  “But you punched her.” A grin was creeping across his face.

  “My dad may not have been much of a father, but he taught me how to defend myself, and punch properly.”

  Alex stared at me, almost as if in a trance. Then he widened his eyes, snapping out of his reverie.

  “Your face, good god! She’s scratched you.” His hand rose to my left cheek where her nails had made contact.

  “I know she scratched me. I didn’t just lash out at her for the hell of it. It was self-defence. Owww!” I winced at his finger-tips touched my cheek.

  “Let’s get this cleaned up. Antiseptic wipes or something. Kitchen, now,” he ordered.

  I followed him into the kitchen, and he pulled out a stool from under the central island, nodding his head, indicating for me to sit.