As the World Falls Down

by Katy Nicholas

  “At first, yes. They told us we could help them develop a vaccine. We trusted them. But then it all changed. They brought in this man—Doctor Lawson. He saw us as nothing but lab rats.”

  Imagining all the awful things that might’ve happened to her turned my stomach. How many people in this community had been subjected to the experiments? I almost couldn’t bear to think about it.

  She stared at me, a look of anguish in her chartreuse eyes. “It’s why we need Nate, Halley. We have questions that need answering.”

  Unexpectedly, I found myself warming to her a little. Or maybe Stockholm Syndrome had kicked in.

  “And what about Claire? What’s up with her?”

  “Claire has been with us for a few weeks now. I don’t know for sure what her mental health issues were before the virus, but she seems to be able to—” Eve considered her choice of words. “She’s more receptive than the rest of us. Sometimes, I hear them, but not like she does. She can communicate with them—the virus, I mean—or whatever it really is.”

  “You’re saying Claire’s…a conduit?”

  “Yes. A conduit.”

  “This is madness,” I muttered, shaking my head.

  Eve raised her hands, palms up, in a who knows gesture. “You don’t know the half of it. Wait, what’s this? A-ha!”

  At the bottom of the very last box, she found what she was looking for. In her hand was a pretty purple packet with the image of a giggling baby on the front.

  I felt nauseous just thinking about it. “You know this is ridiculous, don’t you?”

  She shot me a knowing smile. “Is it?”

  I couldn’t respond.

  ****

  Before…

  I despaired when the snow fell.

  It covered the spring flowers in such a thick blanket of white there was no trace of them left. Everything froze. The rainwater inside the butts became a solid cylinder of ice, and it was so cold that Rebecca brought the chickens into the house and let them wander around freely in the kitchen.

  We weren’t going anywhere anytime soon.

  Most days, I stayed in bed, cocooned in a sleeping bag with a duvet wrapped around me. When I wasn’t asleep, I read, my gloved hands struggling to turn the pages as my hot breath coalesced with the cold air and fogged my view.

  Rebecca asked me, more than once, if I was depressed, but I denied it.

  In truth, I was miserable. But, what right did I have to feel that way? I was alive when everybody else had died. I was lucky, wasn’t I?

  I found myself thinking about my mother a lot, wondering if this was how she’d felt on the bad days when she couldn’t get out of bed or leave the house. As a child, I hadn’t been able to understand her depression—I was resentful of it because I wanted my mother to be like the other mothers. I wanted her to bake cakes for the school fair and run in the parent races on sports day, but she didn’t. Couldn’t.

  “Take some of these, you’ll feel better soon,” Rebecca said, handing me a packet of pills.

  Diazepam.

  “No, thanks.” I tossed them back at her. “I’m fine.”

  But I wasn’t fine. After a few weeks, I knew I had to do something to get me out of the black hole I’d fallen into.

  I needed a friend.

  In a chest, under my bed, I kept the letters that Lizzie had sent me after I’d moved in with Rebecca. She totally begrudged having to write to me by hand, but the cottage lacked two things; broadband and a reliable phone signal. Sometimes, her texts would reach me, but more often than not, they’d get lost in the ether. On average, she wrote twice a month. The last letter I’d received came a few days before the outbreak.

  Slowly, I read through them all, laughing at all the shenanigans Lizzie got herself involved in and reminding myself of what life used to be like…and how it could be again if we ever managed to find other people. I began to remember what hope felt like.

  Lizzie’s final letter to me was my favorite, even though it was the last.

  Halley,

  I’m writing this letter from Terminal B of Gatwick airport! Can you believe that? We’re finally here after a year of planning this trip! Wish you could’ve come with us, but if it makes you feel any better, it’s been a disaster so far. Our plane was delayed for four hours, so we all went to the bar for a few drinks. Bad idea. My boyfriend got absolutely hammered. We had to pretend to be sober so they’d let us board the plane.

  It was all good till he tripped and smashed his face going through the walkway thing. What an idiot! He had to go to the hospital to have stitches! Now we have to sleep at the airport and catch a different plane tomorrow.

  With any luck, he’ll manage to survive until then, and we’ll be off on our adventures.

  I know what you’re thinking…that I’m going to hate slumming it in hostels and shared bathrooms…and you’re completely right, but I’m hoping the scenery makes up for it.

  Anyway, I miss you loads, and I really would rather be going with you than with my idiot boyfriend—I do love him really, but you know I love you more!! Ha-ha.

  Love always and forever,

  Lizzie.

  I smiled. Lizzie had always been an optimist, even when faced with the direst of circumstances. She’d never let anything get her down. She’d never let anyone, or anything, stop her from doing what she wanted. If somehow Lizzie survived the apocalypse, she’d be kicking its ass right now.

  She wouldn’t have given up.

  And neither would I.

  I’d find a way to leave this place, and if there were survivors out there, I’d find them.

  No matter how long it took or how far I had to go.

  With or without Rebecca.

  Chapter Eighteen

  After…

  I was getting closer to Nate. I could feel him nearby as we sat in the restroom down the hall from the cells.

  I’d done as Eve asked, and now we had to wait the obligatory two minutes for the results.

  Perched on the edge of the sink counter, Eve read over the instructions while I laid back on the pretty pink and gold chaise-lounge, taking deep, controlled breaths to stave off the panic attack building in my gut.

  As I clutched the little plastic stick against my chest, I distracted myself with thoughts of Nate to stop me from peeking at the results too early. If Eve kept up her end of the bargain, I would see him soon.

  “Ben said something to me when we were outside. He said that Nate didn’t need help after all. What did he mean?” I asked, unsure if I wanted to know the answer.

  Eve looked up. “Nate’s already evolved. We didn’t need to put him in the fountain after all.”

  “Not sure I understand.”

  Eve seemed hesitant to respond. She chewed at her lip a little before speaking again. “It normally takes hours, or sometimes days, to come back. But Nate returned almost immediately. That’s because…he’s already died and come back to life.”

  “No. That’s crazy. Wouldn’t a person know if they’d died?”

  She shrugged. “Possibly not.”

  No. It couldn’t be true. Nate was alive when I found him at the cabin. It’d been a close call, but I’d brought him back. I’d saved him, hadn’t I?

  “When I first found Nate, he’d—” I stopped. This wasn’t my secret to tell.

  “He’d what?” Eve pressed.

  Shaking my head, I looked away. “Never mind.”

  A few seconds later, I heard her sigh and slide down off the countertop. She repositioned herself on the end of the chaise-lounge and put a hand on my knee.

  “He was alone before you found him?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  The entire scene played out again in my head—the moment I’d seen him, the faintest trace of a pulse under my fingertips, the crackle of static as our lips connected.

  But it wasn’t me that’d brought him back to life. The virus had.

  “He’d taken some pills,” I muttered.

  When I finally l
ooked up again at Eve, she gave me a weak smile. “Desperate times, Halley.”

  We fell into a depressive silence until the timer on her watch beeped, shaking me out of my contemplation.

  Sitting up, I sucked in a deep breath and turned the test around in my fingers.

  Not possible.

  But there they were; two dark pink lines indicating a positive result.

  Eve quickly plucked the stick out of my hand, her eyes darting from the instructions and back to the test several times.

  “Congratulations.”

  “How is this possible? I don’t understand.”

  She let out a gleeful laugh. “I don’t know, Halley. But you are! Do you realize what this means? We have hope now!”

  Her words barely registered with me. My brain burned with questions I didn’t even know how to articulate.

  “You’re in shock,” she said softly.

  I blinked. “You think?”

  She lowered her head, a contrite frown on her brow. “This has been a lot for you to deal with. We’ve handled things badly and—”

  “I need to see Nate. Now,” I demanded. Eve could apologize later if that’s what she was trying to do. Right now, it was time for her to come good on her promise.

  She nodded. “Of course.”

  She slipped the test back into the packet and pocketed it. I didn’t ask what she planned to do with it, but instinct told me Daniel would be the next person to hear the good news. As we left the bathroom and walked toward Nate’s cell, the need to be with him became all-encompassing, pushing all of my fear and worry to one side.

  Feeling brave all of a sudden, I sought to use Eve’s good mood in my favor.

  “Eve? Can you do something for me? Can we keep the baby thing between us, for now? I need time to get my head around all of this.”

  She opened her mouth to reply, but I cut her off. “Please. You help me, and I’ll help you.”

  Eve widened her eyes a little and cocked her head to one side. “Okay.”

  Her quick response left me somewhat surprised, but I thanked her and managed to put a sincere smile on my face, despite feeling like I might’ve just made a deal with the devil.

  When we reached Nate’s cell, she released the bolt on the door and opened it, motioning for me to go in first.

  This had better not be some kind of trick.

  But there he was, sprawled out on the floor, unconscious.

  I rushed to him, sliding to my knees so that I could hold him. “Nate?”

  He was breathing, but he was out of it. His clothing was cold and soaking wet from being in the water.

  “He’s freezing!” There was no hiding the disdain in my voice.

  Eve crouched down beside us. “I’m sorry. Laura must have doped him and then gone straight to deal with Ben.” She unclipped the walkie talkie from her belt and turned the top dial round. “Tobias? You there?”

  “Yep,” came the reply.

  “I need you to bring some blankets up to me. And some clothes.”

  “For the doc?”

  “Yes,” she answered.

  “Okay. Give me five minutes.”

  She set the handset to one side and then motioned for me to help her roll Nate over onto his back. “Help me take his clothes off.”

  Not a situation I ever thought I’d find myself in, but here we were, undressing my undead boyfriend while he slept.

  We managed to peel off Nate’s jeans and t-shirt, but left his boxer shorts on, although for a second, I thought Eve was going to insist we take those off too. Nate would not appreciate waking up without his underwear, of that I was certain.

  It didn’t take long for Tobias to show up. He tossed the blankets onto the edge of the mattress and set the clothes down neatly on a plastic chair, which he pulled in from the corridor outside.

  “Howdy,” he said to me, with a wink. “How we doing?”

  His accent was Irish, soft and distinctly southern. He wasn’t overly tall but still fairly brawny. His hair was a hundred different shades of dark blond, tinged with red, which matched the five o’clock shadow under his nose and around his jaw.

  He helped Eve lift Nate off the floor and get him into a more comfortable position on the mattress. Nate, still totally comatose, didn’t stir once.

  “Thanks,” I muttered, grabbing the blankets and covering him over.

  Eve handed me her walkie talkie. “If you need anything, just radio for Tobias.”

  I gave an incredulous scoff at her sudden hospitality.

  “We aren’t the monsters you think we are,” she said.

  Tobias sniggered. “Well, Eve is. But the rest of us aren’t.”

  If looks could kill, she would’ve murdered Tobias with the frosty glare she sent his way.

  “We’ll talk tomorrow,” she said to me. Then she left.

  Tobias waited till Eve’s footsteps died away. “I’ll be sleeping with one eye open tonight,” he grinned.

  I liked him already.

  “Holler if you need anything,” he told me as he left the room.

  He pulled the door closed, but I didn’t hear the bolt slide across. Either Tobias was forgetful, or we were no longer considered a threat. We weren’t going to be making a daring escape either, considering Nate’s condition.

  Wearily, I crawled onto the mattress and got under the blankets with him, huddling as close to him as I possibly could. He was so cold. But he was alive. Slowly, the painful, wretched ache in my body began to fade, and a sense of relief washed over me. I leaned in and kissed him, feeling his breath on my lips. For several hours, I watched him until my over-adrenalized nerves began to settle, and exhaustion kicked in. Reluctantly, I closed my eyes.

  ****

  Someone whispered my name.

  I prized my eyelids open to see Nate staring down at me, his eyes tired and dull. He put a hand up to my face and stroked my cheek. “Halley.”

  My lips went to his. “I’m here.”

  He glanced around, confusedly, and then lifted the blanket to survey his mostly naked body.

  “I took your clothes off,” I said quickly. “They were wet.”

  He propped himself up on his elbows. “Yes, I remember being in the water.” His face dropped, full of concern. “What did they do to you, Halley?”

  “Nothing,” I told him. “I’m fine.” It wasn’t a lie.

  His darkened eyes narrowed beneath his taught forehead. It was clear he didn’t believe me. And right now, I probably did look like I’d just returned from the dead.

  “How do you feel? What do you remember?” I asked, running my fingers through his hair.

  Nate shuddered in my arms. “I remember them holding me under the water until I…” As his voice trailed off, he swallowed a lump in his throat, his expression distraught.

  He needed to know the truth, and it was better to hear it from me as opposed to Eve.

  First, I told him about Claire and then attempted to explain the rest of it, recalling as much as I could about everything up until his resurrection. I omitted the part where they’d tried to drown me and why they hadn’t. Telling him about the baby could wait—I’d dropped a big enough bombshell on him as it was. As a medical doctor, I wasn’t sure what he’d make of the dead coming back to life, but he listened to everything without saying a word, although the expression on his face alarmed me. It wasn’t disbelief. It was acceptance.

  Nate sat up, bringing his knees to his chest and stared down at the floor. When I tried to put my arms around him, he tensed and shied away from me.

  “What’s wrong?” A stupid question, given the content of the conversation.

  “I’m not me anymore.”

  I wasn’t exactly myself either. The only thing that made us different was that I hadn’t evolved. Yet. “You’re the only version of you I’ve ever known.”

  Nate looked at me with sad eyes but didn’t respond.

  Just then, fear washed over my body. “Do you feel differently about me now?”
/>
  He exhaled deeply. “I couldn’t change the way I feel about you even if I wanted to.”

  I wasn’t sure how to take that. “Would you want to?”

  “What do you think?” he replied, a smirk forming on his lips.

  “Shut up, then.” Snaking an arm around his waist, I leaned my face close to his, planting a light kiss on his temple. He turned slightly, his lips catching mine in an intense, hungry moment of desire. The pull suddenly hit me like a bolt of lightning, and I couldn’t stop or disengage from him. He didn’t seem to be able to stop either because I was undressed to my underwear in a matter of seconds. This was completely the wrong place and the wrong time, but it was happening anyway.

  The light above us flickered as a static hum suffused the air, tickling my skin and lifting my hair. His name tore from my throat as he brought me to a rapid, yet powerful climax. A second later, the light bulb hissed and then shattered, plunging the room into complete darkness.

  “Well,” Nate said, breathlessly. “That’s new.”

  A piece of the hot filament dropped down onto my head. Yelping, I quickly flicked it away.

  “I’m sure it was purely coincidental.”

  He carefully brushed a few shards of glass from the mattress and collapsed down beside me, panting.

  “Fine,” he said. “We’ll go with that.”

  ****

  Leaving Nate to dress in the clothes Tobias had brought, I crept down the corridor to the bathroom. The lights were off, but the sun had begun to come up, casting enough light into the hall for me to see where I was going. Aside from a few distant voices drifting in through an open window, there wasn’t anyone else around.

  No guards. Not a single soul.

  It wasn’t until I caught sight of the little, blinking, red light in the shadows that I realized we were being watched. A camera. All the exits were probably still secured by guards, ready to dart us again if we tried to escape. There was one thing that was of some comfort, though—they didn’t want us dead. Not permanently, at least.

  In the restroom, I used the toilet, then filled the sink with hot water and freshened up as best I could. I felt nauseous but not enough to make me throw up.