Dancing With A Devil

by Julie Johnstone

  Audrey’s mind reeled at his confession. She’d utterly forgotten the kiss his deceased older brother had stolen from her so many years ago. Perhaps she’d pushed it out of her head. Oscar had been her childhood crush, until she’d realized his true distasteful nature. Yet after he died that very summer he stole that kiss she’d felt terribly guilty for her cruel words to him that day in the stables after he’d cornered her. A terrible, sinking thought struck her. Liam had worshipped his older brother. “Have you been pursuing me because of that long-ago kiss? Because you wanted to somehow have what you thought your brother wanted and never had the chance to have?”

  “No.” His reply was vehement. “You’ve got it all twisted. Oscar was the one…” Liam's words trailed off and he jerked a hand through his hair. “Never mind. The past isn’t important now, as long as we're together for the future.”

  Audrey tensed. “I don’t love you.”

  “You will. You’ll grow to love me.”

  “Yes.” She nodded. “Perhaps. But not ever like I love him.” She didn’t bother to name Trent. The angry flare of Liam’s eyes revealed he knew exactly who she was talking about.

  “You’ll forget him in time. And I love you enough for both of us.” He grabbed her and crushed her to his chest.

  She stilled, not wanting to be cruel and pull away. Her head spun with her thoughts. “If this is about a competition with your dead brother―”

  Liam released her. “I’ve told you it isn’t. I admit I was insanely jealous that day I saw my brother kissing you, but I was jealous because I already knew you were the girl for me.”

  She stared at his earnest face, unsure what to believe. Liam and his brother had always competed with each other for everything, as far as she could remember. Her gut told her she was the ultimate competition Liam had no intention of losing, even if his brother was long gone. “I’m not sure what to do,” she admitted.

  He shoved the black velvet bag at her. “Maybe this will make up your mind.”

  She shook her head and tried to push the bag back to him. “A betrothal ring will not clear my thoughts.”

  “It’s not a ring. I have one for you, but this is something entirely different.” He opened the bag and withdrew the jewelry she’d given him to sell.

  Dumbfounded, she took the jewels from him. “You never sold them?”

  He shook his head. “I couldn’t. They’re yours.”

  “But the money?”

  He shrugged. “Mine. I knew you wouldn’t take charity, so…”

  “So you made me think you’d sold them for me.”

  “Yes. I’m sorry I lied.”

  “No.” She briefly placed her hand over his, touched by what he’d done for her. “I understand why you did it.”

  “So, Audrey, will you marry me?”

  Panic seized her voice, so when the door to the library banged open and Mr. Barrett charged in all she could do was gape.

  “My lady, your aunt has fainted!”

  Audrey jumped up and raced out the door, almost tripping over her aunt’s crumpled body. Sinking to her knees, she turned her aunt’s head to the side and caught the faintest flickering of her aunt’s eyelids as Hillie squeezed them firmly shut. Audrey was alternately relived and irritated. Irritation won out. Oh, she’d singe her aunt’s ears good when they were alone for pulling such a ploy.

  Behind her, Liam hovered. “Shall I fetch the doctor for you?”

  Audrey welcomed the reprieve, though her aunt was foolish indeed. Relinquishing her dreams was harder than she’d anticipated. “No, the doctor won’t be necessary.” Audrey squeezed her aunt’s arm encouragingly. “Aunt Hillie.” She spoke to her aunt. “Did you break your fast this morning?”

  On cue, her aunt fluttered her eyelashes for a second before opening them. “Dear me,” Aunt Hillie exclaimed. “I didn’t. That must be why I fainted.”

  Audrey suppressed the hysterical laughter rising in her throat. “Liam, if you’ll just help her up, I’m certain she simply needs nourishment.”

  Together, they got her aunt to her feet, and by the time she was righted Mr. Barrett stepped in to help. Audrey bit her lip to fight off the smile caused by her aunt’s dramatics. “If you don’t mind, I’ll see to my aunt and meet you in the park later this afternoon?” she asked Liam. “I’ll have your answer then.”

  He looked as if he wanted to argue, but when he nodded his head in assent, Audrey nearly expelled a relieved breath. Letting it out slowly and subtly, she saw him out. When the door was firmly shut, she turned to her aunt, who stood a few paces away with Mr. Barrett gripping her elbow.

  Audrey glared at her, and Hillie smirked back. “No need to thank me,” Hillie chirped as she removed her elbow from Mr. Barrett’s grasp.

  “My lady, can you stand on your own?”

  “Certainly,” Hillie replied, reaching up to adjust the crooked feathers in her hair. But I am starving. Why don’t you run along and see that breakfast is set out?”

  Once Mr. Barrett departed, Audrey wilted into a wingback chair and pressed her fingertips to her temples. “Whatever am I going to do?”

  Trent knew he was driving his carriage recklessly toward Audrey’s home, but he couldn’t seem to restrain himself. Julian was settled with the new nanny, Bridgette was on her way back to France and all he could think about was telling Audrey about Julian and seeing her reaction. For some reason, his instincts told him her face would solve a good deal for him. What that was, he had no idea, but he wanted to trust his instincts as he used to before Gwyneth had made him trust no one, least of all himself.

  After arriving at Audrey’s he tethered the horses and rapped on the door. He blinked in surprise when Audrey’s aunt answered. Her eyebrows arched and her mouth momentarily formed an O before settling into a hard line. “What do you want?”

  Her tone was less than friendly. He forced a casual smile, though tension vibrated through him. “I assume you are feeling all better?”

  “I feel perfectly fine. But try telling that to my stubborn niece. She’s determined to ruin her life and sacrifice herself for me. I tell you, I’m fit as a fiddle no matter if my heart beats strangely or not. I’ve never felt better. I’m going to give Dr. Otts a scalding he’ll never―”

  Trent held up a hand, his mind grasping her words as coldness seeped into his bones. “Otts is your physician?”

  She gave him a narrow-eyed look. “Yes. So you might as well turn around and head back the way you came, Lord Davenport. My niece is not here, and I highly doubt even if she were that she would see you.”

  Fear pummeled his gut like a well-trained fighter. Digging deep, he forced a lethal calmness. “Do you mind telling me why Lady Audrey would refuse to see me?”

  Audrey’s aunt observed him with a look of utter distaste. “I don’t mind telling you at all. My niece is a lady. As such, it would be highly improper to allow you to call on her when she’s to be betrothed to another man.”

  Through the roaring dim of blood rushing in his ears he asked, “Lady Audrey is going to marry Thortonberry?”

  “Seems so,” Audrey’s aunt snapped. “Between you with your secrets and her worry over my health, the foolish woman seems to feel she has no choice.”

  He clenched his teeth against his flaring temper. “My secrets? Such as?”

  “It’s incredibly hard to keep a child secret, Lord Davenport, no matter how much you wish to.”

  He was going to throttle Otts, but first he needed to find Audrey. He refused to believe she no longer loved him because of Julian. It went against everything he knew of her character. “I want to be certain I understand you. You’re telling me Audrey would rather marry a man she doesn’t love than me, simply because I have a child.”

  “I daresay she would have rather married you, but you never could quite come to snuff, could you? And to keep such a secret as a child…” Audrey’s aunt clucked her tongue.

  Damnation. He had to have the chance to explain about Julian. “Please
.” He touched Lady Hillary’s elbow. “I need to see her.”

  The woman’s face remained cold. Hell and damn. Now he knew where Audrey got a bit of her inner strength from. He was going to be forced to grovel. So be it. “I came here today to tell her about my son.”

  “And?” The one word was frosty.

  He refused to lose Audrey to his fear. “I love her. I love her and it’s useless to fight it.” Saying the words released him. By God, he felt like a new man. Now, if only he could convince Audrey he was a changed man and worth her love.

  A slow smile pulled at the older woman’s lips. “Now, then.” Her tone had become sweet and motherly. She grasped him to her and gave him a hug. “Was that so hard?”

  “You’ve no idea,” he admitted, returning her embrace before extracting himself.

  “Yes, well…” She chuckled. “The course of true love never did run smooth.”

  “Shakespeare,” Trent supplied, wanting to hurry Audrey’s aunt along.

  “Indeed. I knew I liked you. She’s at Hyde Park. She planned to take a stroll and clear her mind before meeting with Lord Thortonberry.”

  Hope filled Trent’s chest. “So she’s not betrothed yet?”

  “Not yet, though I doubt that will make it much easier for you. Her mind seemed set when she left here, though I tried to make her see reason. You know how stubborn she is, though.”

  “I do. It’s one of the things I love best about her.”

  After saying a quick goodbye, he rushed to untether the horses and depart. Once on the road to the park, he pushed the horses harder than he normally would, driven by the fear he would be too late to stop Audrey from accepting Thortonberry’s offer. Once she gave her promise, Audrey was not the kind of woman would ever break it. His breaths came in short gasps as his blood surged in his veins. He had to make it to her on time.

  A short time later, he entered the park and spotted Audrey strolling alone down the narrow footpath along the southern end of the Serpentine. Sunlight flittered through the bright green and yellow leaves of the tall oak trees that lined either side of the path. She moved under a particularly shady spot where the overhead tree was especially dense, strolled out of the shadows and meandered behind a row of full green trees whose branches started at the ground and swept up to completely canopy her.

  Jesus, he prayed he wasn’t too late to stop her from accepting Thortonberry. After everything, he was at her mercy, a state of existence he’d tried to avoid repeating. Yet it was unavoidable. He slowed the horses, his movements made jerky by nerves. Once he dismounted, he quickly saw to the horse, and then abandoning all pride, he raced to her. She turned as he rounded the corner, her delicate brow crinkling. His heart jerked in response to the lovely picture she presented in a yellow walking dress with the thick green canopy of leaves as her background.

  “Your aunt told me you were here.”

  “I wish she wouldn’t have done that.”

  Audrey’s frosty tone was expected, but her anticipated reaction didn’t make the clenching of his gut less painful. “I’m glad she did,” he replied, determined to push through and do what he’d come to do. “She tells me you know of my son already, but I’d like the chance to explain.”

  The guarded green gaze that stared at him ripped at his heart. Her distrust and pain was obvious. But she hadn’t refused to hear about his son. He hesitated, measuring her for a moment. He’d pushed her away―hell, everyone away―for so long. It seemed impossible for him to form the bluntly honest words that might put him back in a position of weakness he’d done all in his power to avoid. It had been easier to tell her aunt how he felt, which was ridiculous.

  Audrey sighed loudly and crossed her arms. “If you’ve nothing to say, I wish you would leave. Lord Thortonberry is meeting me here and he expects an answer to his proposal. Three would make a crowd, don’t you think?”

  Coward, his mind taunted. He couldn’t let her go without ever having tried. “I cannot believe you no longer want to marry me because I have a son.”

  Her lower jaw fell open. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’d never be so shallow. If anything, it would be because you hid the boy from me. But more so it’s that you don’t love me.” Her voice shook and her eyes glistened. He struggled against himself not to yank her into his arms. Every part of him warned to let her finish even as relief flowed through him at her words.

  “Go on,” he encouraged gently.

  “Go on?” She sounded incredulous. “All right, I might as well. I think I fell in love with you the first day I met you, and I’ve done nothing but offer my love to you ever since. You returned my offer with lies, secrets, more lies and a cold heart. I would never marry a man who doesn’t have the capacity to trust and love me and you’ve shown that time and again. How could you hide the fact that you had a son from me?”

  “I didn’t know I had a son.”

  “You didn’t know?” She grunted. “Do you expect me to believe that?”

  He scrubbed his hand over his face. “Yes, because it’s true. I had no idea until several days ago I had a son. Gwyneth’s sister, Bridgette, showed up at my home with Julian and that is the first I knew of his existence. I wanted to tell you in person, which is the reason I came to see you today. A note will not do for that sort of thing. Do you not agree?”

  Her mouth turned down further, but at least she nodded her agreement. He relaxed his ridged stance. “I had to get Julian settled and see Bridgette safely back to France.”

  “I can understand that,” she said slowly. “What I don’t understand is what you said a moment ago. Why ever would I not accept your child? He is your flesh and blood, and therefore I would love him. Do you really think I could be that cold?”

  “No, darling, I don’t. You misunderstood me a moment ago. What I meant was I refused to accept you are anything but the honest, kind-hearted woman that I love.”

  “That you what?” Her words were a shaky whisper.

  “I love you,” he said simply.

  Her breath hitched, but she didn’t respond. The three words hung in the air between them, the moment stretching until his taut nerves strummed in his ears. Desperation curled in his belly and knifed a path to his heart. “Am I too late? Is your mind set against me and for Thortonberry?” His heart pounded against his breastbone.

  Audrey could scarcely believe what she’d heard. “Too late,” she mumbled, too shocked to make her incoherent thoughts come out correct.

  Audrey blinked as a pleading look swept across Trent’s proud face. Heaven above, now he was misunderstanding her! Before she could say a word to clarify, he dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around her waist. “Audrey.” His hoarse whisper filled with entreaty shook her so badly she placed her hands on his shoulders to steady herself.

  He glanced up at her, his green eyes glowing with pain. “I’ve been a fool. Desperate not to be hurt again. Until the moment I held my son and felt immediate love for him shove its way into my heart, I thought I could live without ever loving anyone with a completeness that left me vulnerable again.”

  She swayed toward Trent, his confession filling her heart, body and soul. Gently, she stroked a hand through his hair and sighed when he curled his fingers around her hips tighter, possessively―like he would never let her go. She grazed her fingers lovingly across his cheek. “What do you think now?”

  “That if I’d been smarter, I would have realized months ago my fight against loving you was hopeless from the moment I met you. You smile, and my heart tugs. You flay me with a rejoinder and my chest tightens. You sway your hips and my body burns. But most importantly, you’ve shown me what it is to truly be loved by someone. You never gave up on me. On us. Please, I beg you―”

  She pressed a finger to his warm lips, a ripple of awareness flowing through her as their skin made lingering contact. “Don’t beg.” She tugged on his arm to make him rise.

  Slowly, he moved to stand, but instead of letting her go he slid his arms up her back and loc
ked his hands around her waist. He pulled her against his hard chest while his eyes implored her. “I will gladly beg, if it will make you reconsider marrying Thortonberry and marrying me instead.”

  A happy chuckle burst from her. “I have no intention of marrying Lord Thortonberry.”

  “You don’t?” Astonishment crossed Trent’s face, followed swiftly by a look of stark relief. “Did your aunt know that?”

  “Of course. Why?”

  “She tricked me, but I’m damn glad she did.”

  She twined her hands around his neck. “I’d convinced myself it was my duty to marry and provide my aunt with the comfort she deserved, but in the end, I just couldn’t do it. And after I talked to Whitney I felt secure in my decision and not as if I was abandoning my aunt.”

  Trent grinned. “What did my cousin say?”

  “She delicately pointed out I would be acting just as my father had if I married Lord Thortonberry. I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. Maybe my father thought he would be a good husband to my mother.” Audrey shivered at the possibility that she’d been thinking exactly as her father might have so many years ago. “Between Whitney and myself we came up with an alternative solution to my financial dilemma other than marriage.”

  “And what was that?” Trent asked, grinning at her.

  “Sally needs a new nanny, so she agreed to let me take the position, and your mother, it seems, wants a companion to live with her, so I was going to send my aunt there. My mother always said a million tears won’t change a lady’s life but a well-thought out plan can alter her future.”

  “Your mother was clearly a brilliant woman,” Trent said huskily before cupping Audrey’s face and bringing his lips mere inches from hers. “Will you marry me and let me love you forever?