by Lila Kane
I put the bouquet to my nose and sniff hard. “I don’t want to talk about Chet.”
And I don’t. Chet is out of my life and now I have flowers. And Michael. And, hopefully the whole evening with him.
There’s still irritation in Michael’s eyes, but I have the perfect remedy. I lean up on my toes and kiss him softly, tracing my tongue over his bottom lip.
He groans and crushes me to him. “Brianna. You’re going to make this hard.”
I glance down at his pants with a wicked grin. “Already looks hard.”
He shakes his head. “Dirty girl. Is that how you want to play it? Because we can change our plans.”
I blink. “Plans? We have plans?”
He takes the flowers from my arms and sets them aside. Then he advances on me. I walk backward, part amused, part curious, and part thrilled. When Michael wants me, he makes it clear. And I hardly ever have a problem with it. I want him most of the time, too. And it’s nice to be wanted. To want. And to be able to be with someone who doesn’t fault you for it.
“We have plans that are going to be put on hold,” Michael says, still stalking toward me.
“But…wait…” I’m nearly to his bedroom—actually the bedroom we’ve been sharing—and I can’t stop smiling. “I want to know about the plans.”
“They’re plans for dinner and maybe something afterward.”
My shoulder blades hit the wall. “Really?”
He stops in front of me and slowly puts his hands up on either side of me, caging me in. “Really. It’s our anniversary.” He smiles. “Three months from when first signed the contract.”
For the second time tonight, my mouth drops open. I process his words for a moment, and then throw my arms around him, surprising him.
He absorbs the gesture, wrapping me in his arms, and kissing my ear, then my cheek, then my mouth.
“You didn’t have to do this,” I begin, then continue when he opens his mouth to argue, “which of course you know. But you did. You remembered and did it anyway and I—I—” I break off, heart full and mouth even more full of words I want to say.
I love you.
It had almost come out of my mouth. I’d almost told him what I’d been feeling for the past several days. Michael is more than I’d expected, more than I ever thought I deserved.
He touches my cheek. “What is it?”
Instead of telling him how I feel, I show him. I latch my mouth onto his and kiss him with everything I have.
I feel him grow hard again, the evidence of his arousal pressing between us.
“Brianna,” he murmurs, his hand twisting in my hair. He pulls my head back and nips at my lips. “You’re so sweet.”
“I think that’s my line.”
I break free of his grasp to unbutton his slacks. I pull them down, along with his boxers, and let his erection spring free.
He goes in for a kiss, but I skirt that as well, knowing what I want. I lower to my knees in front him. Michael starts to say something, but his words are cut short by his slow release of breath.
I wrap my lips around his cock, starting at the head, and then slide as far to the base as I can.
He braces one hand against the wall as I pleasure him with my tongue, mouth, and teeth. His other hand curls into my hair and his hips pump automatically against me.
“God, Brianna.” His voice is low, husky, barely controlled. “Shit. This feels so good.”
I work harder and faster, determined to bring him to his breaking point. His body shudders, and then he grips my shoulders.
“No, I can’t,” he hisses, pulling me up. “Not here.”
He tugs me into the bedroom, then takes off my clothes quickly and efficiently, all the while kissing me and murmuring words about how beautiful I am. Every time I try to take off another piece of his clothes, he brushes my hands aside and says, “Let me.”
By the time we’re both completely naked, I’m slick with wanting him. My center throbs along with the fast beat of my heart.
“I want you,” I murmur.
His lips trace mine while his hands wander my body. “And I want you.”
He turns me around and kisses my neck. My knees press against the bed, and I can hardly stand with his mouth and hands on me, but Michael holds me up. When one hand slides lower and lower, skimming my abdomen and then cupping me, I moan.
“I need you,” I say this time.
He slides his finger inside of me, working it around my wetness, and my knees nearly buckle. “Bend over,” he says.
I do what he asks, leaning over the bed and bracing myself with my arms.
“Lower,” he murmurs, running his hand down my spine and giving me chills.
I press my cheek against the comforter with my ass in the air. Michael’s hands wander again, skimming down my sides, caressing my bare ass cheeks, and then circling around to cup my breasts.
I feel his erection hard against my opening. I push my hips back automatically, trying to feel him inside of me.
“Is this what you want?” he asks.
“Yes.”
My heart races out of control. I want him inside me so badly, I can’t stand it. Before I can beg, he shifts and then slides inside of me, nice and slow.
I spread for him inch by inch, and every movement feels so good. His groan of pleasure turns me on even more.
“Yes, please,” I whisper. “Faster.”
Michael obeys, pumping his hips against me so our flesh slaps loud and hard in the silence of the room. My fingers clench hard on the comforter as the pressure builds.
“God, yes,” I say.
Michael grunts something I can’t make out. He grips my hip with one hand to help pull me back against him every time he thrusts, and the other slides around to my front. His finger finds my clit, and I let out a sharp gasp when he connects.
My whole body is alive with sensation, at Michael’s mercy as he drives me closer and closer to the edge.
He pumps one more time and twirls his fingers expertly, and I cry out as the orgasm hits me. Michael continues to thrust into me, over and over again and hitting every sensitive spot. When he finally reaches his peak, he comes hard inside of me even as my orgasm continues. All I can do is hang onto the comforter as the pleasure rolls over me.
26
She looks like a million dollars. A million literal dollars in this case. Brianna’s here because I offered her something she couldn’t refuse. Money.
But I don’t think that’s why she’s staying. She’s had the chance more than once to walk out. To leave without any consequences.
But she’s still here. More than that, she still wants me.
Although she might not want you after what you did with Chet.
I shove aside that thought. Chet needed to be dealt with, so I did. Yeah, I bothered him at work, but it was where he was when I needed to talk to him. It wasn’t even anything huge—I basically just told him to back off. Forcefully. With a small threat. But that’s it.
He deserved it
But now it’s dealt with and I can focus on Brianna and our night.
The long slit in her dress shows plenty of leg as I help her from the limousine. After our session in the bedroom—and out of it—this evening, I’m more relaxed than I’ve been all week. It’s just what I need to be able to put the mess with Chet out of my mind and wind down.
With the woman I’m falling in love with.
I’d almost told her. Back at home, in the glow of after-sex, I’d almost said the words.
But then I’d balked. Not only had I never told a woman I loved her before, but those words meant…what? I’m committed to Brianna? She’s part of me and I’m part of her?
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the committed part that scares me. It’s the things I’m not telling her. It’s what she might expect of me if I say those words.
Brianna sets her hand on my cheek. “What’s wrong?”
I straighten out my smile, making sure it’s convin
cing. “Nothing. Just thinking.”
“About what?”
I turn, taking her hand and guiding her into the hotel. “You. And how amazing you are.”
She flashes a grin that helps relieve some of my worry. She says “thank you” to the bell hop as we step inside the front doors of the hotel. “We’re eating dinner here?”
I nod. “Their restaurant is one of my favorites, and the view is amazing.”
She breaks eye contact and examines her surroundings as I guide her through the lobby, past a dark, quiet bar, and to the restaurant entrance. The hostess greats me by name and leads us directly to our table, an intimate one out on the patio.
Brianna stops before we reach the table. “You’re right. The view is amazing.”
Waves crash against the shore just beyond the patio. It’s a thirty-minute drive to get here, but the view, the night—Brianna—are all worth it.
I feel like we’ve already gone through a lot in our relationship, and I want to show her how much it means to me that she’s still here.
But nerves run through me. Because I also plan on telling her the truth, something that might change the rest of our relationship.
We sit close to each other, both facing the ocean so we can watch while we eat.
“I’ve never be here before,” Brianna murmurs as she peers through the menu. Her gaze keeps getting caught by the water.
“You want me to order for you? There are a few things I’d like you to try anyway, and I’ve sampled most of what’s on the menu.”
She closes her menu and nods. “Yes. Thanks.”
“Champagne?” I ask.
She smiles and touches my arm. “We really are celebrating.”
It’s those touches that kill me. Wait—who am I kidding? It’s everything about Brianna that hits me right in the gut and keeps me off-balance. It’s an amazing thing, and also one that makes me realize how I can’t keep being dishonest with her.
After the waitress takes our order and pours the champagne, I hold up my glass. “To three months,” I say.
She clicks her glass with mine, her smile nothing less than dazzling. “Three months,” she says before taking a sip. “It’s gone by so fast.”
It has. After that first little hiccup, it’s been a blur. We’ve spent so much time together and gotten to know each other and been there for each other. All the things I want from a true, healthy relationship. All the things I wish I could have, but might have to give up after tonight.
“How was the rest of your day?” she asks.
Another thing I don’t want to talk about. But that’s because of the thing with Chet. While there are a few topics I do want to discuss with Brianna, how I dealt with Chet isn’t one of them.
“Exhausting. I wish I could have stayed home with you today.”
She leans in to kiss my cheek. “I told you I’d come into the office. Liv was fine with that, too—”
“That’s not what I meant. I know you were willing to come in—it was just a busy day. Meetings the whole time, and I wanted you to be able to have your space and talk with Liv.”
It wasn’t just that. I’d had to deal with Chet, too. Which was why I asked if she’d rather stay at home today instead of coming into the office where we’d been working together for the last few weeks. I wanted her there, but I didn’t want the questions.
Now, everything with Chet is dealt with and things could go back to normal. Hopefully.
I link my fingers with hers. “I’d like it if you came back to the office on Monday.”
She smiles, and it makes guilt drop in my stomach. “I’d like that, too.”
When she finally turns away from the water, meeting my eyes, my stomach clenches. It’s now or never. But I just can’t bring myself to say the words out loud. And what if we’re on different pages about the whole topic? Then I’ll ruin the evening when there’s no point.
Better bring it up in a roundabout way.
“These last few months have been some of the best of my life,” I tell her.
Brianna’s fingers squeeze on mine. “Me too. Really. When this whole arrangement started, I never thought things would turn out like this. I thought…” She shrugs. “I don’t know what I thought. That maybe…”
She glances to the water again. I sense that she’s also holding something back, and now I’m wondering if she’s doing the same thing I am. Trying to say something she isn’t sure how to say. Something she thinks will change the dynamics of our relationship or maybe even ruin it altogether.
“What?” I ask. I bring her hand to my lips and kiss the knuckles. “Tell me.”
Her gaze comes back to mine. “I didn’t think this would work out, and I was prepared for it. I was prepared to put in my time.” She laughs and shakes her head. “I know that sounds terrible, but it was kind of like a job. I never expected I’d really like you. I never expected to…” She swallows. “To start to fall in love with you.”
Her words hit me right in the heart. Love. “Brianna.”
Her hand twitches in mine, like she’s ready to pull away. “I’m not—not expecting anything from you. Really. I’m just telling you the truth—”
“Wait.” I hold her hand tight so she can’t escape. “I’m processing. I didn’t expect this, but trust me. It isn’t a bad thing.”
In fact, I’d started to think the same thing. These feelings I have for her are serious and deep. Which is why I have to make sure we’re on the same page.
“I’m just saying,” she tells me, “I know it’s fast. And I know this isn’t what you signed up for. Love. So—so, like I said. I’m not expecting anything. In fact, I shouldn’t have said anything at all.”
I kiss her knuckles again. “Seriously? I want to know how you feel, and you don’t have to apologize for it. I stopped with the expectations weeks ago. Now I’m just enjoying myself. And to be honest, this is part of the reason why I wanted to get out tonight. So we’d have a chance to be alone and talk.”
“About us? About the future?”
I nod. “Yes. To…I don’t know, see what our expectations are. See if there can be anything more.”
“You mean like…like where to go after this?”
“Yes. What might happen if things keep going this direction. I know we still have nine months, but what if things progress?”
Her cheeks pale a little in the moonlight. I see that I’ve scared her. Shit. This isn’t how I wanted things to go. I just wanted to make sure she didn’t have one particular expectation of me that I couldn’t give.
“Damn it,” I murmur. “I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable. I’m just talking about regular everyday things other people talk about at the beginning of their relationships. Like, would they be willing to move for the other person or have they ever been married before or do they want kids.”
I study her face with the last words, seeing if she has any reaction.
“Oh.” Brianna seems to relax. “Well, you know I haven’t been married before and rest assured, I do want kids. Lots of them—okay, no, not lots. I mean I still want to have my job and everything…”
But as she continues on, I can’t hear a word of what she’s saying. She’s already told me enough, and told me what I expected. She wants kids. She loves kids.
And kids are one thing I can’t give her.
27
He’s been acting strange since our anniversary dinner, and I know why. Because I’d told him I was falling in love with him.
Damn it. Why’d I have to open my big mouth and say anything? Michael isn’t looking for a long-term relationship—a wife—or a real fiancée. But why did we even celebrate an anniversary dinner then? And why did he start talking about the future and the next steps?
The whole thing confuses me. I slide over on the bench when I see Deb. She carries two coffees I can see steam rising from as she enters the park.
“Special delivery,” she says.
I hold up the bag sitting next to me. “I br
ought scones.”
“Yum.” She passes over the coffee and joins me on the bench. “So, Miss Business Woman. I haven’t seen you in weeks.”
“I know. I’ve been busy.”
Deb wiggles her eyebrows. “I know what that means. Late nights. Hot sex.”
Normally it would have made me laugh, but this time I only shrug and sip my coffee.
“Uh oh,” Deb says. “What’s wrong? What happened? What did he do?”
“Nothing. I mean, he didn’t do anything. It’s…me.”
Deb shifts to face me. “You did something?”
“Yes. The stupidest thing I could have done. You’d think I’d learn after Chet. I’m…I don’t even think before I talk sometimes. It’s a really bad habit.”
“You’re honest and open. That’s not a bad thing.”
“It is when you tell someone you’re falling in love with him and he doesn’t say it back.”
“Ooohhh.” Deb nods. “I get it. So, wow, you really care about him that much?”
“I didn’t—I mean, I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s not like I’m fully down the rabbit hole. In love. I just…I knew I was heading that way. Fast. And he took me out for dinner for our anniversary and everything was perfect and he started talking about the future. I told him I was starting to fall in love. It didn’t seem like a big deal when I said it—and I didn’t expect him to say anything. It’s fast and he’s—he’s Michael Parsons. Like…famous bachelor or whatever. But since then he’s being weird. Distant.”
Deb bites into her scone, thinking. “Seems kind of contradictory if you ask me. He takes you to dinner but then clams up when you tell him how you feel. If this is all just an arrangement to him, then why did he take you to dinner? Why does he care?”
“I don’t know. I—oh, shit.”
Alarmed, Deb looks around the park. “What? What is it?”
I nod my chin toward the path nearby, clenching my hands tight around my coffee cup. “It’s Chet.”
And he’s walking right toward us.
“What does the asshole want now? Doesn’t he know when to leave well enough—holy hell, what happened to his face?”
