Loving a Lawman

by Amy Lillard

  Seth tried to hide his amusement as she tottered on the thick wedge heels of her sandals and took a step back, as Layla the Princess did everything in her little girl powers to put even more distance between them.

  Note to self: give this kid anything she wants for saving me.

  “Well, I came over to see if you could give me a ride to Cattle Days next weekend,” Darly Jo said, her beauty queen smile never wavering despite Layla’s efforts.

  Seth tried to look chagrined and disappointed at the same time. “I’d really love to, but Millie just asked if I’d escort her.” He slipped an arm around Millie to pull her close and felt her stiffen under his unexpected touch. “For old times’ sake and all.”

  Darly Jo’s pink-shellacked lips formed a surprised “Oh.”

  Seth silently prayed that Millie wouldn’t contradict him. And she didn’t. She just stood there, rigid under his embrace as she looked from him to Darly Jo.

  Darly Jo looked from Millie to him and back again. “I see,” she said, though her tone was not the least bit understanding. “Well, maybe some other time, then.” She allowed Layla one more small shove; then she waggled her fingers at them in farewell and headed off toward the buffet table still laden with the remnants of birthday cake and the last dregs of Jessie’s famous punch.

  The minute she turned, Millie stepped out from under his arm and glared at him. “What was that all about?”

  Seth eyed her sheepishly. “Uh-hum, Darly Jo has a tendency to be a little—”

  “I noticed,” Millie said without waiting for him to finish.

  “Sorry. I shouldn’t have used you that way. I’ll make it up to you.”

  “How’s that?”

  “By actually escorting you and the lovely Miss Layla here to the Cattle Days Picnic.”

  But Millie was shaking her head before he could even finish.

  “Why not?”

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “I think it’s a great idea.”

  “I love picnics,” Layla chimed in from behind him.

  “Seth, I—” Millie shook her head.

  “If you go with me, it’ll get my mother off your back.”

  At that he saw her resolve start to crumble.

  “And there are rides.”

  “I love rides,” Layla hollered, her boots stomping as she danced in place.

  “I won’t take no for an answer,” he pushed.

  “Please, Mama, please, please, please.”

  “How can you say no to that?” Seth teased.

  “Fine,” Millie said, her tone grudging. “But you’re buying.”

  * * *

  Jessie clicked off another snap and tried not to stare. Everyone knew that Seth Langston and Millie Sawyer had had a thing . . . once upon a time . . . when she was still Millie Evans. But the possessive way Seth snaked his arm around her and pulled her close had Jessie wondering how quickly the spark of that old flame could be brought back to life.

  Like she cared. She blew her hair out of her face and checked the film in her camera. In the age of digital photography, she found a thrill in taking a picture and then having to wait to see the finished product. Wait to see whether she had captured the moment or missed. Wait to see if the lighting was right on film or just in the present. It was important to make sure that the film was correct and she still had enough in the old camera to keep taking pictures. Wouldn’t do to run out. And it gave her something to look at besides Seth . . . and Millie . . . and Darly Jo.

  Why had she never noticed that Seth was such a chick magnet?

  He even had Layla, Millie’s four-year-old daughter, hanging on to his every word. And his legs.

  Was she surprised because she had just never thought about him that way? Or was there something different about him today? She cut her eyes up from changing the film to chance a look at him. She didn’t lift her head, wouldn’t want to start a load of gossip.

  He smiled at something one of the adoring females said, a quick flash of even white teeth and slashing dimples.

  Nope, he looked the same. So what was different?

  She tossed that thought away and turned back to taking pictures. On the other side of the horse corral, what looked to be a softball game was beginning to form. She snapped off a couple of shots. Wouldn’t be long before Sissy Callahan Murphy made her move and said something like “What a shame! Coach Edwards would be soooo disappointed to know that malicious destruction of private property is all that the hours of batting practice has netted his favorite high school softball player.”

  Jessie turned away and pretended not to hear, but she could feel the heat rising in her chest all the way to the tips of her ears.

  Thankfully Sissy had used up all her cattiness for the day and flounced off to join the game.

  Jessie had known that showing her face at Wesley’s party wouldn’t be a cakewalk, but she’d no idea how hard it really would end up being. She endured the not so veiled jokes and barbs, the whispers behind the hand—as if she didn’t know that they were all talking about her. She just put on her game face and cowboyed up. She smiled, pretended not to hear, and kept right on serving up plates of the chocolate cake with a side of blue bubble gum ice cream. She played with the kids, took pictures, and otherwise pretended to have the most wonderful time she’d ever had at a birthday party. But enough was enough.

  Jessie went to find Seth and see if he was ready to go.

  Damn, it was hard to hold her head up in this town. Sometimes she felt as if her neck would break under the strain.

  She managed to retain her composure until she found him. And she even kept herself together as she said her good-byes to the Langstons, gave Wesley a big squeeze, and gathered up her things for the trip back to town.

  Only when Seth pulled the truck out of the yard and started back toward town did she allow her guard to slip.

  She laid her head against the seat back, the motion tipping her hat over her eyes.

  “You okay?”

  She could tell by his voice that he had turned to face her. “Yeah,” she said, though they both knew it was far from the truth.

  She sighed and tried to push all the negativity out with the air. They weren’t at the party anymore. She didn’t have to keep her guard up or a fake smile plastered across her face.

  The thought had a real smile curving her lips at the corners.

  “There it is.”

  At his words, tears stung the back of her eyes. Why was it that Seth had always been there for her?

  She pushed herself up straight. “Do you know why I did that to Sissy Callahan’s ’Vette?”

  “I have an idea.”

  “It was the water tower.”

  “Huh?”

  “That day, Chase had painted ‘Sissy and Chase’ on the water tower.” She shrugged as if it didn’t still hurt. “I was jealous.”

  It had been the beginning of the end for them. She could see that now. But at the time, all she could think about was that Chase had performed this grand gesture for Sissy Callahan when she, Jessie McAllen, was supposed to have been Chase’s girl. So why couldn’t he paint the water tower for her? Even then, she never should have taken it out on Sissy or that poor unsuspecting car, but it was easier than getting mad at Chase. Even when he had come in with yellow paint under his nails swearing that he had nothing to do with it, she’d believed him and instead went after Sissy.

  “He just wanted to get into her cheerleading skirt.”

  “I’m sure he succeeded too.” The thought made her stomach sink, even after all these years.

  “You’re probably right.”

  She leaned her head against the seat back and closed her eyes, trying to keep the memories at bay and not succeeding.

  “Give it a couple of days, Jess.”

  She no
dded but knew deep down it was going to take more than a couple of days for this storm to blow over.

  * * *

  Seth chanced a quick look at Jessie. She looked dead on her feet. Carrying around all that pride had to be exhausting. But what choice did she have?

  Cattle Creek was the greatest place on earth, but it wasn’t always the easiest place to live.

  Small towns were like that, like one big family. And everyone knew what a pain family could be.

  He just wished that Jessie didn’t have to suffer further at the hands of Chase. She had enough of her own problems to deal with before his brother piled even more on top.

  Would she really leave Cattle Creek? If she could hand him thousands of dollars to fix Chase’s truck, how much more did she have squirreled away?

  Even more important, what would he do without her around?

  Chapter Six

  Damn it! Of all the luck.”

  Jessie opened her eyes and sat up straight. “What’s going on?” She blinked a couple of times, trying to wash the sleep from her eyes. Had she fallen asleep? She shook her head to clear away the wispy cobwebs of fatigue. These days it seemed that she was more tired than she had ever been. Seeing as how she wasn’t working at Manny’s any longer, she could only blame her exhaustion on the fact that she had been working like crazy trying to build up her escape fund and her body was in sore need of rest.

  Big billowing clouds of white smoke poured out from under the hood as Seth eased the truck toward the side of the road.

  “The truck overheated,” he said, putting it in park and killing the motor.

  “Ya don’t say.” Jessie tried to keep her face impassive, but her lips twitched just the same. She pushed her hair back and half turned to face him.

  Seth pointed through the windshield without removing his hand from the steering wheel. “I’m pretty sure, yeah,” he said with a nod. “Hopefully it won’t take long for it to cool down, but—” He peered out the windshield at the cloudless Texas sky. Today’s high was supposed to be near one hundred. “In this heat it might take a little longer.”

  “How convenient.” Jessie sat back and crossed her arms.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Nothing really.” She shrugged. “It’s just that when a boy—”

  He cleared his throat.

  “—man runs out of gas—”

  “I didn’t run out of gas. The truck overheated.”

  “—it’s usually,” she continued as if he hadn’t spoken, “just a way to be alone with the girl he has in the poor old broken-down truck.”

  “It’s a great truck.”

  “In 1973 maybe.” She couldn’t help teasing him.

  “Those are fighting words,” he growled. “If you insult a man’s truck, then you need to be aware of the consequences.”

  “Oh, yeah? Like what?”

  “Like—” He leaned toward her, but then seemed to think better of it, or maybe he remembered who he was with. He shrugged, turning to face the front.

  Jessie stared at him, perplexed by this sudden change. For once she felt as if she were seeing the real Seth, the man behind the badge. The man behind the mask. She hadn’t been aware that he wore a mask until he let it slip, and now that it was firmly back in place, she was curious—no, more than curious—about who Seth became when it was gone.

  “Did you do this with Millie?”

  “Hmmm?” He turned back to face her, but his eyes were focused on a point just above her left ear.

  “Millie. Did you ever tell Millie that you had run out of gas just so you could, uh . . .”

  Seth nodded, then ducked his head looking almost chagrined. Almost.

  “Men are skunks,” she said with a laugh.

  “Not all of us.” He chuckled.

  “Might as well be.” She sat back in her seat as smoke continued to roll out from under the hood.

  But instead of thinking about the trickery of men, she remembered the time she had accidentally run across Seth kissing Millie in the game room at the ranch. She couldn’t have been more than ten, but she could tell that it was a good kiss, like the kind in the R-rated movie she had snuck in to see. They had thought they were alone, and Jessie had been nearly paralyzed with something she couldn’t name as she watched them. Now she knew it was merely curiosity, but that kiss had stayed with her all these years.

  Did he kiss the same now? Did he cup his hands around the girl’s face, treasure her as he had Millie? Would Millie be the next girl he kissed?

  Why did she even care?

  Suddenly she wanted to know what it felt like to be kissed that way, with that all-consuming need. Cherished, desired, loved.

  She scooted across the seat toward Seth, not giving a second thought to anything but him. And that kiss.

  He didn’t speak as she tipped back his hat and pressed her lips to his.

  * * *

  He was on fire.

  Or maybe he was dreaming.

  How else could he explain the fact that he had Jessie next to him? Sweet Jessie with her lips hovering over his. Their breath mingling. She wet her lips with the tip of her tongue.

  Seth groaned and pulled her to him again.

  Never before. Only in his wildest fantasies had he imagined that Jessie would come to him like this. She smelled like sunscreen and strawberries and tasted like the last hot day of summer. She tasted so good and yet he was mad at her for the way she made him feel, the way she made him forget all about the fact that she had been with Chase first. Mad about the fact that despite everything, he still wanted her.

  Not so gently he ran his fingers into her hair, knocking her hat off her head. His mouth devoured hers, the kiss turning from sweet to fierce in mere seconds.

  He wanted her. And yet he hated himself for wanting her. He should stop kissing her. He should let her go. But he couldn’t. He had held himself in check for so long that once the dam had broken, there was no going back.

  He would have her, if only this one time, and maybe then he could get her out of his system. His desire burned like hot coals doused with gasoline. He wanted her, and he wanted her now. The lines between truth and reality blurred as she responded to his plundering kiss.

  How could she make him want her so badly? What type of sorcery did she employ that could make him forget everything else but the need to possess her?

  She whimpered as he nipped her bottom lip. He wanted to punish her for making him want her despite all else. And yet he couldn’t stop kissing her. Loving her was like a runaway freight train with no engineer.

  He hated her. He wanted her. He had to have her.

  But this was not how he wanted her. He wanted to bare every inch of her, kiss every smooth centimeter, taste every silky millimeter. Instead he was sitting inside his busted truck, burning up with desire and anger. He pushed a hand between them even as his mouth continued to plunder hers. She gave as much as he offered, meeting him violent kiss for violent kiss.

  He freed himself, barely registering that Jessie had raised herself up on her knees, straddling him, giving him complete access to whisk her panties to one side.

  He buried his face in the side of her neck, taking a bite here and there. He wanted to make sure she knew that this time was different. This time she was with him.

  Her breath caught as he entered her. She was tight. So tight. Not “gee, it’s been a long time” tight, but “never done this before” tight. And that just couldn’t be.

  He pushed a little farther. Met with more resistance and the barrier of her innocence, but that meant . . .

  Goddamn it.

  He pulled away. “Jessie.”

  Her head was down, her hair shading her expression from his searching gaze.

  “Jessie, look at me.”

  She did, and Seth felt a thousand emo
tions hit him at once. Gentleness and a touch of anger. Not with her, but with himself. Up until now he’d been thinking about her being with his brother, not knowing that she never had been. He had been fueled by anger and a desire he couldn’t contain. He hadn’t been gentle.

  She had a bite mark on the side of her neck. Her lips were red and swollen from the force of his kisses.

  Damn it.

  They were both still nearly completely dressed. And it was her first time. It never should have been like this.

  He swore again. He had to stop. Now. He placed his hands on her hips, intending to put an end to this madness.

  “Seth?”

  “We can’t do this, Jessie.”

  “Please don’t stop.”

  Maybe it was the urgency in her voice. Or maybe the fact that he couldn’t deny her anything. He didn’t know. Why did she want him? He could ask, but it wasn’t time for talking.

  He pulled her lips to his once again, taking his time. Soft, sweet kisses even as he settled her lower into his lap. This was how it should have been from the start. He couldn’t undo that. He could only make it right from here.

  He laved the red mark on her neck, gave it a kiss to heal the sting. But even as he wanted to take it slow, that outrageous desire reared its head, demanding to be assuaged. She squirmed against him, unable to complete their joining as long as he was holding back.

  “Seth?” Her voice was soft and filled with questions, her eyes closed.

  “This may hurt a bit.” He hated to cause her pain. Yet he needed to love her completely, fully.

  She opened her eyes, those gray depths, raging with a desire all her own.

  He swore, then covered her mouth with his once again.

  She gasped as he broke through, but he swallowed the sound, vowing to make this right. Love her as she deserved to be loved.

  Even if they were in the front seat of his pickup.