Shattered Spirits

by C. I. Black

  His gaze found hers in the darkness. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” More pain lanced through her head. What she really needed was a few days, but Diablo wasn’t a drake to forget his words, particularly when it came to humans. He’d said she had until dawn. “You okay?”

  “I’ll live.” He sucked in an uneven breath, wincing. A hint of light flickered from his eyes. Mother, how she wished it was real and that he was a drake and possessed magic.

  In a way, he did. She no longer saw him as Eric’s doppelgänger, and she still felt something for him. Whatever that something was, it was more than what she’d felt for Eric… maybe not more, just different?

  Her heart contracted. And maybe she was fooling herself. What she felt for Ryan was more, strange and uncontrolled.

  “Any idea how far from the car we are?” The light flickered again, sliding across his cheeks and forehead.

  “I’ll call a cab. I think that’ll be easier.” God, her head hurt. Now it felt as if everything about him radiated light.

  “Are you okay?” Ryan asked. “Do I need to get you to a hospital?”

  She snorted, sending a spike of pain through her head. “I should ask the same of you.” But if they went, she’d have to wait to wipe his memories.

  “I’ve got bruised ribs. Nothing I haven’t had before, and nothing a doctor will be able to do much about.” His gaze grew unfocused and a hint of his earlier confusion slid across his expression. “What I could use is a drink.”

  “I know just the place.” God damn it, she was going to take him home. Not to have her way with him like she wanted, but to erase every last bit of herself from his memory. This hurt so much more than just leaving Eric.

  CHAPTER 28

  Capri slid her key into her front door. She couldn’t get her heart to stop pounding. Mother of All, she didn’t want to wipe his mind. She wanted the complete opposite. She wanted him to know everything, know what she really was and accept her. But that was impossible. He was already struggling with what Diablo had let him see; knowing the truth would drive him insane.

  Ryan shifted behind her, easing closer. His heat, his presence, permeated her senses, as if his aura brushed against hers—an aura he couldn’t have because he wasn’t a dragon. God, she was going crazy with want. The drive here, in his too-small Camaro, had been too much to bear. She’d convinced herself it was the guilt of what she had to do that made her flash from hot to cold and back again. Except it wasn’t what she had to do, but what she wanted.

  She’d been through this before. With Eric.

  She couldn’t do it again.

  “Having trouble with the lock?” he asked.

  How long had she been standing on her front step? “No.”

  She turned the key and opened the door. A rush of emotions, guilt, fear, and desire, flooded her. Since Eric, she hadn’t brought anyone home, human or drake. This was her sanctuary. The only place safe and untouched by dragon politics and fleeting human relationships.

  And here she was, inviting Ryan in to deal with both in one foul, mind-destroying moment.

  He followed her inside, staying close, as if he, too, was magnetically pulled to her. Her pulse stuttered. Which way should she go? Follow her duty or follow her heart?

  She turned to him, pulled, drawn, controlled by a force she couldn’t explain, and met his gaze. Pale green irises ringed pupils full and filled with a matching desire. The world fell away and all that remained was Ryan. Her want burned hotter, darker, more than her want had ever been for Eric. She’d thought she’d loved Eric, and while she had, what she’d felt had been light and fleeting. What flooded her now was deep, threatening, consuming. She could lose herself in Ryan and not care. Dragon law be damned. She would defy them all for this man. She would die for him.

  “Capri.” He breathed her name.

  It shivered over her, fluttering to the center of her being, and a purr trembled deep within her in response.

  She froze, an ice sweeping over her.

  The purr threatened again. A dragon only purred for her—

  No. This was wrong. So wrong. She jerked away from him, heading to the kitchen.

  “You wanted a drink?” she forced out as she glanced back at him.

  “Yeah.” His gaze said he wanted something else.

  God! The purr rumbled again. No, it couldn’t be a purr. She was mistaken. She had to be mistaken. Dragons only purred for an inamorator. And she was not, could not, be inamorated.

  She pulled out her bottle of Glengoyne and two glasses. The lip of the Scotch bottle rattled against the tumblers as she poured. She fought to make her hands stop shaking but couldn’t.

  She had to wipe his memory. It was for the best. Diablo would kill him otherwise. But Mother, she didn’t want him to forget her. She wanted—

  Another purr bubbled low in her throat.

  God damn it! It was not a purr! She was not that drake, the one destined for a love that could never happen.

  “This is one heck of a house. You should have told me the FBI makes way more than a local cop,” he said. “I would have changed jobs.”

  She grabbed the glasses and forced herself to look at him. He stood in the doorway to her greenhouse, one hand on the door frame by his head, the other pressed to his side as if that would help ease the pain of his bruised ribs. He looked completely at home, framed by the greenery and orchids as if he belonged right there. As if he’d always been there.

  She crossed to him, an agonizing push-pull within her, drawing her inexorably to him no matter how much logic told her she had to keep her distance.

  “It’s a family home.” She offered him the Scotch.

  He reached for the glass, his fingers brushing hers. Electricity zinged up her arm. Her breath caught in her throat and the zing turned to a scorching, liquid heat that rushed straight to her core.

  The purr rumbled in her throat, soft, sensual, and all too real. No, no, no.

  She shoved past him, heading into her hoard. She didn’t know where, didn’t care, only that she needed balance in a world that wouldn’t stop twisting.

  This was a disaster. She wasn’t supposed to be inamorated with him.

  Just the thought sent more need searing through her.

  Mother, please no.

  But her spirit had chosen. Against all common sense, crossing species lines and defying dragon law, her spirit had picked Ryan. All her desire had never been because he reminded her of Eric. It was because she was inamorated with him. A human.

  Her throat tightened, tears burning her eyes. She emptied her glass, but the alcohol didn’t burn away the hurt and desperation and soul-deep craving. It didn’t help put the world back into place. Nothing could be in place anymore. Ryan was human, and unlike Anaea with her magic, Ryan would live a too-short human life.

  The thought was overwhelming and agonizing. Her soul had destined her for a few years of bliss and then an eternity of heartache.

  “Capri.” He drew close, his impossible aura tingling across her senses.

  Her pulse pounded. Perhaps a few years of bliss would be enough. If she was lucky, it would be sixty or seventy years. The joy and pleasure of that time could fill the rest of her lonely eternity. It would be enough. It would have to be enough.

  But that didn’t solve the problem that he’d age and she wouldn’t. She’d have to leave early, like she had with Eric, or tell him the truth.

  Mother, she wanted to tell him the truth.

  Except her love couldn’t save him from going crazy.

  Her breath hitched in her throat again.

  The only way to salvage this situation was to wipe his mind of every thought and feeling and memory of her. She had to remove everything, erase herself from his mind. It was the only way to keep him sane.

  “Where are you?” he asked, his breath sliding warm over the back of her neck.

  She wanted his hands and mouth there, not just his breath. “I’m… I’m thinking about the case.”

&nb
sp; “No, you’re not.” He drew closer, his hard chest brushing her back.

  The electric attraction snapped around her. She could just lean back, give her body to him, and let the world, dragon politics, her duty, everything vanish in his embrace.

  But if leaving Eric had been hard, leaving Ryan would shatter her. It would be easier not to give in and not take that final step to a true merging of souls.

  She stepped away from him. The agony of even that single step was excruciating.

  “The case,” she forced out.

  “God damn it, Capri.” He grabbed her arm and yanked her back to him, softly grunting in pain with the sudden movement.

  “You should watch your ribs.”

  “We’re not talking about my ribs. We’re talking about us.” He tipped her head up to look her in the eye. The world fell away again, and she was drowning in his essence. If she could just stay there with him.

  No. She had to stop it before it started. End it before his death could destroy her… or her very presence hurt him.

  That was the only thing she could give him. She couldn’t present him with shinies and meat and pieces for his hoard. She couldn’t spend his too-short life lying to him. And she couldn’t spend her life knowing the heartache that awaited her.

  This way was better. Fast. Rip off the bandage. Erase his memories and save him. She subvocalized her power word, but he captured her lips with his and all concentration vanished. All that remained was the feel of him and the heat he fueled within her. Every nerve burned with need and desire and rightness.

  He wrapped an arm around her back, drawing her closer as if he couldn’t get close enough. And it wasn’t. She needed him in her, filling her, searing his soul to hers.

  Warmth rushed over her, pooling between her legs. She slid her hand under his shirt, trembling with the effort not to release her dragon and rip the cloth from his body.

  A purr bubbled. He devoured it, kissing and nipping, teasing her dragon-nature.

  She growled and tugged at his shirt. He eased it off, then pulled her tight against him again, as if unable to withstand even a second of separation. The pain of his bruised ribs was still there, clear in his eyes, but there was a stronger, consuming passion there, too. His erection pressed against her, hard, more proof that he wanted her as much as she wanted him.

  Her purr trembled through her.

  He moaned. “God, Capri. I want you so much.”

  The purr broke out in full. She couldn’t hold it back and didn’t want to anymore.

  He drew back, the separation aching, but his fingers slid down her neck to the buttons on her shirt. Her breath hitched. He flicked open one button, then the next. Slowly. So damned slowly. Heat built within her, growing with every button he reverently released. His fingers traced her flesh, his touch so light, so sensual.

  She closed her eyes, giving in. Her soul had chosen and if she was only going to get one night with her inamorator, she was going to enjoy it.

  His breath burned across her neck. She tilted her head back, offering him more, offering him all of herself.

  He took the invitation, his lips brushing against her throat, his hands trailing to the button on her pants.

  Her heart pounded faster. He slid his lips down her neck to her breasts while he slipped her pants over her hips, letting the fabric ease down her legs.

  She dug her fingers into his hair. His restraint was driving her crazy. She wanted him, all of him, now. She’d never felt so hot, so needy in the hundreds of years she’d been alive. She was so sensitive even the thought of him touching her made her burn.

  He leaned back, a wicked, sensual gleam in his eyes. “Feel good?”

  She growled. “What do you think?”

  “I think I’m going too fast.”

  “You’re not going fast enough.” She grabbed the front of his pants, tugged him close, and undid the button.

  He matched her growl and shoved her back against a worktable scrubbed clean and ready for work… she just never thought it would be ready for this.

  He unhooked her bra and caressed one of her breasts, teasing the nipple into a fierce, straining point. Pleasure built, quivering, undulating, growing. His gaze burned into her, searing him completely on her soul. His other hand skimmed the edge of her panties. Lightning zapped at his touch.

  Oh, God. She was melting. His fingers skimmed closer to her core. More heat rushed in response, so hard she ached. Then his fingers brushed her, darted away, then brushed again.

  She was breathless, heady, desperate. She pulled at his pants and underwear, palming his thick, full erection.

  He moaned and slid a finger into her. Yes, oh, yes. She shuddered, the sensation rushing through her. She arched back. More, please more. Electricity built within her as he stroked, consuming every part of her. But it wasn’t enough. She had to have him, all of him. The need to give herself to him, bond her soul to his completely, was overwhelming. Male or female, when a dragon’s soul had chosen, that was it. There was no one else. They wouldn’t love another, wouldn’t bond with another. She was his and he was hers.

  She caressed his erection, struggling to be gentle, and drew a moan from him. She stroked harder, matching him touch for touch. His breath came fast and hard. Like hers. She wrapped her legs around his waist and drew him closer, pressing him against her, drawing his tip to her center.

  A purr released in full. He pressed a little harder, teasing again, with the slow, agonizing pleasure of what she wanted, needed. Him in her. Them joined. He had to feel it, too. The energy swirling around them. The crackling of their auras against each other.

  She’d never experienced anything like it in her life. It stole all breath and thought. All that remained with the truth of them.

  Then he thrust into her. That truth erupted between them on breath and motion. His lips captured hers and he thrust again. Pumping harder, faster, filling her, filling the soul-bond. Her dragon roared, its passion white-hot, building into a ferocious climax. Climbing. Swelling.

  It crashed over her, sweeping her up, filling every cell, every fiber of her being. Ryan cried out, he pulsed within her, sending more glorious ripples shuddering through her.

  This was right. This was the way it was supposed to be. He had claimed her in the most personal way a human could and her soul had claimed him. He was her inamorator. Whether he accepted her or not, he was her soul’s completion.

  CHAPTER 29

  Ryan brushed a strand of hair from Capri’s face and she sighed, a fully satiated feminine sound. They’d curled up on a wide, cushioned bench in the middle of her greenery and flowers and had cuddled that way, half dozing, for… Ryan had no idea for how long. It could have been an eternity, and he wouldn’t have cared.

  This was a perfect moment. One he didn’t want to end. They’d found meaning, understanding. It was a connection he couldn’t put into words. There was something about Capri that reached to the center of his being, and he liked it.

  He couldn’t explain it. It certainly didn’t make any sense. He barely knew this woman, and yet he knew, soul-deep, she was the one.

  Which was ridiculous. Love at first sight didn’t exist. His need to be with Capri, to protect her—not that she needed protecting—to have her permanently in his life was…

  He didn’t know what it was. But he knew, without a doubt, this was more than just lust. Sure, there was lust involved. Just the thought of her—and the feel of her skin pressed against him—made him hard.

  But it was more than that. And so long as they stayed where they were, nothing could change and take whatever this was from him. Except neither of them could stay in this greenhouse, suspended in the glow of their connection, forever. They’d have to face the world and he couldn’t let his ruined career destroy Capri’s.

  His heart jerked.

  “What?” Capri asked, her voice soft and sensual like her body.

  “What time is it?” He’d forgotten about Melissa.

  “Got s
omewhere important to be?” she asked, her blue eyes bright with playfulness. She was stunning. Her skin was luminescent with satisfaction. That ferocious creature within her glimmered in her gaze, promising more passion and a fierce dedication to him if he accepted her.

  And if he didn’t get to Melissa, his ex would destroy this amazing woman’s life. Just being associated with him could jeopardize it. If he cared for Capri, he couldn’t accept what was promised in her gaze.

  “I forgot, I have a meeting with someone.” He eased off the bench, his bruised ribs complaining with the motion, and grabbed his pants. He felt for his phone, but it wasn’t in his pocket. It must have slipped out.

  “I didn’t think you were that kind of guy. The love ’em and leave ’em type.” She bit her bottom lip, her gaze traveling down his body, filled with heat and passion.

  God! He could lose himself in her, take her again right now. But he couldn’t let Melissa hurt her. When whatever this was with Pete or Andy or whoever was over, Capri would come to her senses.

  “I’m sorry. This is important. I won’t get another chance to deal with it if I don’t make this meeting.”

  A phone rang, the tone bright and cheery. It wasn’t his.

  Capri sighed. “Looks like the world has returned.” She fished through their clothing and pulled out her phone, but met Ryan’s gaze before answering. “What we started here,” she said to him, “it’s not finished.”

  His pulse pounded, his desire swelling. No, it was definitely not finished.

  “Jones.” She pulled on her panties and bra, a black lacy set that accentuated her pale skin. “You sure?”

  She eased around a table half-filled with plants and opened a laptop hidden among the pots. With a few clicks, she pulled up her email. “I’m opening it now. Thanks.”

  “What have you got?” he asked.

  “Gig, ah—Special Agent Valverdis came through with the ATM footage.” She opened the file.