Cas: Heroes at Heart

by Maryann Jordan

  “You weren’t. Honestly, if I didn’t sometimes try to find something to smile about, I would have gone crazy.”

  She released a long sigh. “Dad was diagnosed with cancer about the time that I graduated from college. I worked as an editor, both for a small publishing company and freelance. I also began writing and self-published a couple of books. Dad was still working, even throughout his treatments, until he became too weak. Lionel, who couldn’t or wouldn’t hold down a job, was living with them, so I didn’t move back into their home at first. It took a couple of years, but I began to see some things that concerned me, so I hired a private investigator.”

  Gasping, Cas leaned forward, his gaze intense. “What did you find out?”

  “I found out that Lucille had been married before. In her early twenties, she had married a much older man in Virginia, and when he died, she had a small inheritance. She and Lionel had blown through most of her first husband’s money before she even met my dad.”

  His brow scrunched, he said, “Bianca, did your dad let her know about your inheritance? I don’t mean this to sound bad, and your dad was a great guy from what I remember, but it’s not like he was… well…”

  “The rich husband-catch of the year?”

  She watched as he winced, and she gave a little shake of her head. “Don’t feel bad. I totally agree with your assessment. My dad was a nice looking, sweet guy. He was a hard worker, a gentleman, and a faithful husband, but to be honest, I couldn’t figure out why Lucille went for him because she seemed to like the flashy type. It wasn’t until near the end that I started putting two and two together.

  “I suppose that when Lucille met Dad, she made certain assumptions about how much he made, and at some point, he must’ve told her how much money was being held for me. She got her hooks into him, convinced him that she loved him, and figured she had time to get her hands onto the money. What she didn’t count on was the close relationship that my dad and I had. He wasn’t going to touch that money just to give her or Lionel a better life.”

  “Did she think that she was going to get it when your dad died?”

  She sighed, rubbing her forehead. “Dad was getting weaker, and he and I talked about what would happen if he didn’t beat the cancer. I had just come into the money from my grandparents. He also wanted me to know that in his will, Lionel was getting a small amount of money, Lucille would be able to finish paying off her house, and there was a small life insurance policy for her.

  “One day, I came by to see him and overheard Lionel and Lucille arguing. Lionel was mad that she had not gotten Dad to sign everything over to her, including the money set aside for me. She kept assuring Lionel that if she had to forge his name, she was going to get her hands on all the money.”

  “Fuckin’ hell,” Cas said again. “I know I keep saying that, but it’s the only thing that seems appropriate!”

  “I slipped back out of the house so they never noticed me, and that’s when I contacted a private investigator and found out that they had no money. I talked to my dad, and I think at the end he finally realized what kind of person he married. He died just a few weeks after that.” She held his gaze, squeezed his fingers, and said, “She tried to sue me for the money, and it took months for a judgment to come down, but it did. And in my favor. My dad’s will stands as it was written, and the inheritance from my grandparents is all mine. They got none of it.”

  “I can’t believe all you’ve been through,” he said. “And to do it all alone. I wish I’d known. I wish I could’ve done something.”

  “You were my shield when I was younger, Cas. You couldn’t be my shield forever. Anyway, alone isn’t always so bad,” she said, her eyes searching his. “I just wrap my good memories around me like a security blanket, and then I can face anything.”

  12

  Cas’ mind whirled with all the things that Bianca had told him. He could not believe that everything she had been through had not broken her, and yet, here she sat, staring at him with the same look of happiness that she had when he first met her as an eleven-year-old girl.

  As he continued to grapple with the information she had shared, she concluded, “So, here I am. Deciding to come back to a place where I was happy and find out what’s next for me.”

  “How did you get here?”

  Laughing, she said, “I drove! I got rid of my small apartment, sold what furniture I had there, let my lawyer and financial planner know what I was doing, and hit the road. I drove north to Washington, then east into Montana. I loved driving for hours and just seeing the beautiful vista, and it was nice to be around so few people after having been in crowded California for so long. I wanted to see mountains, so I came through Wyoming and Colorado. I went through the plains in the middle of the country, and then through Oklahoma and Texas where I walked into the surf of the Gulf.”

  “Wow… what a trip!” Other than the Army, he had never traveled much, but listening to her talk, he suddenly had the desire to see new places… if he could be with her.

  “After that, I came up through the south and then the Great Smoky Mountains in Tennessee and North Carolina. I finally made it into Virginia, which was my destination all along.”

  Uncertain what to say, he just continued to hold her hand, rubbing her fingers gently as his gaze never left hers.

  “Cas, I had no idea you were living next door. I was simply traveling down this road to avoid an accident on the highway when I passed a ‘For Rent’ sign. I can’t explain what made me pull in, but as soon as I saw this little cabin, it was as though all the stress and longing fell away. As though I’d been searching for something for a very long time, and my search was over. I came back to Virginia because I wanted to be in a place where I had once been happier than I’ve ever been. I had no idea if Miss Ethel was still living in the old house, but I just knew I needed to go by and see.”

  They sat quietly, still holding hands in the middle of her sofa, the sun sliding behind the trees casting shadows across the front porch. He held her gaze as her hand squeezed his.

  She tilted her head slightly to the side, and said, “I’ve literally just handed you the last twelve years of my life. Please, please, tell me about yours.”

  He sucked his lips between his teeth and shook his head slowly back and forth. “Bianca, I don’t even know what to say. I mean, what you went through… kept going through. I’ve got nothing that even compares to that.”

  “This isn’t a contest, Cas. We’re not competing for who had the worst twelve years. I just want to know about you. The last I saw, you were getting ready to go off into the military and my dad was moving me away.”

  He stared into her face, seeing earnest interest as she repeated, “I just want to know about you.”

  He thought back to the last time he had seen her… the goodbye right before they both left Virginia. “The Army was tough. They want to break you down and make your team and your squad become your new family. I get that, but it was a struggle for me at first. I had brothers. I had Miss Ethel. And for four years, I had you. Some people jump straight into that military mindset, opening themselves up and letting others in. Me? It was hard.”

  “I never thought about that,” she confessed. “I know getting through boot camp is hard physically, but I never thought about the emotional aspect.” Her eyes dropped to where their hands were clasped. “Did it get better?”

  His gaze drifted to the side, his eyes landing on the knitting basket near the chair. “I missed seeing Miss Ethel knit.” Seeing her gaze jump back up to his, he offered a rueful grin. “Seriously, everybody talks about being homesick when you’re in the military, and honest to God, what made me the most homesick was thinking about her knitting as she sat in the evenings. By the time I joined up and shipped out, Zander, Rafe, Cael, Jaxon, and Jayden had already left home, as you know. That last year, it was just me, Asher, and Zeke.” He held her gaze and added, “And you.”

  Her lips curved and she repeated, “And me.” />
  “You were only finishing your sophomore year and too young for me to go for anything more than friendship. But I admit I liked the idea of you being there when I got out. When your dad jerked you away and took you to California, I figured that was it.” He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles and continued, “When we got to our first tour in Afghanistan, I finally realized that people could have more than one tribe. I slowly began opening up to the other members of my squad, learning their stories, learning about their lives, and began sharing about mine.”

  “Were you stationed in dangerous places?”

  Shaking his head, he said, “Shouldn’t have been. We were stationed at a base. I was a mechanic. I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do, but Jayden had talked about being a mechanic, and I figured that was always something I could do when I got out. My first couple of tours were okay. Crazy hot summers. Freezing winters. Sand and dust getting in the vehicles, making them run like shit. Sometimes we didn’t have the equipment we needed to fix things, so we got good at jury-rigging anything we could. But, by the time I’d been in four years, I was close to my team. I’d found a new sense of brotherhood, a new family. It didn’t take the place of my real brothers or Miss Ethel, but I finally felt like I belonged.”

  “Did you think about getting out?”

  Chuckling, he replied, “Yeah, every fuckin’ day.” Holding her gaze, he said, “But what would I return to? It wasn’t until Zander got out and bought Grimm’s, Rafe got out and started some crazy-ass modeling career—”

  “Modeling?” she all but shouted, eyes wide.

  Laughing, he said, “Yeah, Rafe was in some dumbass Army calendar. Ended up with an agent, and as soon as he got out, he was signed. Did that for over a year, living in L.A., until he got sick of it. Came back to Virginia, started work as a landscaper, and met Eleanor.”

  Joining him in laughter, she said, “I can see that. He was never stuck on himself in high school, but he loved to work out. Even though I was just a kid, I remember thinking he had muscles on top of muscles!”

  They sat for a few minutes, their mirth slowly easing back into seriousness. She gave him a silent nudge when she squeezed his fingers again, and he sucked in a deep breath.

  “Jayden had just gotten out and was working to buy his garage. He let me know that anytime I wanted to get out, I could come work for him. I was tired of the Army by then but couldn’t imagine not being with my team. It may have taken a while, but I’m serious when I said they became my second family. Then the decision was taken away from me.”

  Cocking her head to the side, she asked, “What happened?”

  “We were out one day, having to pick up some equipment that had been blown to shit by an IED. That was the most dangerous part of my job. We couldn’t leave anything for the enemy to possibly take and use against us. So, even if something was destroyed, we had to haul it back to base.”

  He moved his free hand, absentmindedly rubbing it over his chest. “We hit an IED ourselves. Actually two. The first one was in the vehicle in front of me and knocked us to the side. I jumped out and tried to run forward to see who I could save when the vehicle I had been in ran over another one. Blew us all to shit. I landed on my back, a searing pain in my chest. I wanted to get up, but it was as though I couldn’t move. I looked down, and swear to God, I had a piece of metal sticking out of my chest.”

  Her fingers jerked against his as her breath sucked in quickly. “Oh, my God! Oh, Cas!”

  “Don’t remember much after that. A helicopter ride. Emergency surgery on base. Another seriously drugged-out plane ride to Germany, where I spent some time.” With his fingers grasping the neck of his T-shirt, he jerked it down, similar to what she had done earlier, exposing a scar on his chest. “Looks like we’re matching, doesn’t it?”

  They were now sitting very close, and as he stared at her, her eyes never left the puckered scar on his chest. She leaned forward, placing her lips on the top of the scar, giving a little kiss. Her silky black hair was nestled under his neck, and the sweet scent of her shampoo wafted to him. Closing his eyes, a little sigh slipped between his lips.

  She leaned back, her eyes boring into his. “You tried to save the others.”

  “A lot of good it did. We lost several of our team that day, and others were injured.” He shrugged, shaking his head slightly.

  “So, you came back home.”

  “Yeah. I convalesced for a little while at Miss Ethel’s, then started working at Jayden’s garage and reconnected with my brothers.”

  “And living out here?”

  Smiling, he replied, “I got back into my carving and furniture building. I needed more space, so I started looking. Found the cabin and built a workshop almost two years ago. It was perfect. I used some of the money that I’d saved while I was in the Army and bought the place. Up until recently, I was working full-time for Jayden as a mechanic and doing my furniture building on the side. As I started selling a few pieces, especially the ones that have carvings in them, I’m spending a little bit more time doing that.”

  “I couldn’t believe the work when I saw it earlier,” she said, her eyes bright. “The pieces are beautiful, Cas.”

  The shadows had deepened outside as the two sat on the couch. He felt a strange sense of exhaustion from having bared his soul and figured she felt the same. And yet, there was also elation at having reconnected. As he looked toward her, he stared at her profile as she moved her gaze about the room. “What are you thinking?”

  Focusing her gaze on him, she smiled. “I’ve only been back in Virginia for a couple of days, and yet, I feel more at home here than I have anywhere in the past twelve years. I can’t believe that I ended up in a cottage right next to the one person I never wanted to say goodbye to and wondered if I would ever see again.” Worrying her bottom lip, she asked, “How is that even possible?”

  “Agatha Christie once said she noticed when coincidences start happening, they go on happening in the most extraordinary way.” Shifting closer until their legs were almost entangled, he whispered, “I’m not going to question it. And I sure as hell am not going to fight it.”

  He let go of her hands so that he could cup her face, drawing her nearer to him. She came willingly, and he tilted her head slightly so that her mouth was the perfect angle for him to take. Moving slowly to assure that she had plenty of time to withdraw, he was heartened when she closed the distance herself.

  Their lips touched lightly, and for a few seconds, he was transported back in time to when his lips touched hers in their first and only kiss. Now, the shackles of childhood were gone, and they both took the kiss deeper. He breathed in her scent as well as the fresh taste of her, his tongue gliding over hers. He swallowed her moan as her body leaned into his. She swung her leg over his lap, straddling his thighs as her hands clung to his shoulders, pulling him closer. Her hair glided over the back of his hand as he held her jaw, the sleek strands every bit as silky as he remembered.

  He finally pulled back, sucked in a ragged breath, and stared at her glossy, kiss swollen lips before lifting his gaze to her eyes, the blue piercing his.

  “I dreamed of this,” she confessed, her voice a hoarse whisper, and her eyes filled with desire. “For as long as I can remember.”

  “You’re not the only one. I just never thought I’d have another chance with you.”

  She smiled, and he closed the distance between their lips once more.

  13

  The kiss continued, flaming hotter with each second. Barely coming up for air, Cas gladly accommodated, letting Bianca rule their movements as the kiss deepened. Her tongue slid inside his mouth, tangling with his, and desire shot through him as she began to grind her soft core against his jean-clad cock.

  Her arms clutched his shoulders, and one of his hands slid from cupping her cheek down to grasping her ass. He knew where he wanted this to go, but now that he had her in his arms, he did not want to rush. She was not a woman to bang, but one to be cherished. One
to hand the world to.

  Suddenly, her stomach growled, and her top teeth landed on her bottom lip. “Sorry,” she giggled.

  Having lost track of time, he said, “We should eat.”

  “I’ll fix something,” she said, starting to move away.

  He shook his head. “That’s not what I meant. We can go out.”

  She touched his face gently and smiled. “We’re here. We’re talking. We’re getting to know each other again. It won’t take long for me to fix something, and I’d really like to.”

  Cooking was not something he enjoyed, and he was not about to turn down a meal. Standing, they linked fingers and he allowed her to lead him into the kitchen. The meal was quick and simple considering she had bought a rotisserie chicken at the grocery store earlier. It did not take her long to make chicken tacos. They tasted amazing even though she kept apologizing that the spice was from a packet that was also store-bought.

  Near the end of the meal, Princess yowled loudly, and they both laughed. “Looks like someone else is hungry,” he said. He knew he needed to take his cat back home and feed her but hated the idea of being away from Bianca now that they had found each other again.

  “I know you need to take her home, but I hate to see you go,” she said, staring up at him as she leaned forward to pet Princess.

  He chuckled, saying, “I was just thinking the same thing.” He loved the way that Bianca said what she was thinking, just like when she was younger. Sighing, he said, “I do need to feed her and make sure my windows are all shut.”

  They stood at the same time, moving directly into each other’s arms. Her head was tucked against his chest, and he felt her soft breath against his arm.

  “Um… what are you doing tomorrow?” he asked, hesitation lacing his words.

  Her arms tightened around his waist as she leaned her head back and gazed upward. “I work from home, remember? I have some writing and editing to do, but my time is my own.” Cocking her head to the side, she asked, “Why?”