Justice for Erin (Badge of Honor: Texas Heroes Book 9)

by Susan Stoker

  She’d felt the same way when they’d spoken at The Sloppy Cow. He was polite, funny, and seemed genuinely interested in what she had to say. She didn’t have a lot of experience with men, but she was pretty sure her interest in him was returned. It was a heady feeling for a woman with her background.

  She remembered one incident at the bar when they were talking and a gorgeous woman in a tight miniskirt and a blouse that showed off her…assets, had walked right up to Conor and leaned into his side. She’d pressed her tits against him and put her hand on his arm.

  She’d asked, “Buy me a drink?”

  He’d stared at her with a look of disgust so plain to see on his face, Erin took a step back. “Are you kidding me?” he’d asked acerbically.

  “You looked lonely. I thought you might like some company,” the gorgeous, but apparently clueless woman had responded.

  Conor had pried her hand off his arm and taken a step away from her even as he said, “First of all, I’m not lonely. I’m talking to Erin. Secondly, if I wanted your company, I would’ve asked for it. And thirdly, if I was going to buy anyone a drink, it’d also be Erin, but I know she doesn’t drink while she’s working. So why don’t you run along and find someone who’s remotely interested in what you’re offering.”

  “You aren’t interested?” the woman had asked with raised eyebrows.

  Instead of being mean, which Conor totally could’ve been, he’d simply said, “No.”

  “Your loss,” the woman had said, shrugging.

  Erin had frowned at Conor when he’d turned back to her, and blurted, “Why did you turn her down? She seemed like a sure thing.”

  He’d stared right into her eyes as he’d leaned his elbows on the bar, getting closer to her, and said, “In case you missed it, I was talking to you. I’m not looking for a one-night stand. And the only sure thing I’m interested in, is you.”

  She’d been so flustered that he’d apparently chosen her over the incredibly beautiful woman, Erin hadn’t said a word. She’d merely turned away and started to make drinks as if he hadn’t just blown her mind.

  Her being flustered hadn’t seemed to faze him though. He’d continued to talk to her when she wasn’t busy and by the end of the night, she’d almost forgotten the incident. Almost.

  Shaking her head and forcing herself back to the present, she said, “I’m going to stop and get gas in about five miles.”

  “You want me to drive for a while so you can get some sleep?”

  “Nah, I’m okay,” she told him. “I took a long nap earlier today, so I’m good.”

  “You sure?” he asked.

  Erin nodded. “I’m sure. But you should get some sleep. You look tired.”

  “I am. Worked seven days in a row to be able to take this weekend off.”

  Erin’s eyes widened. “Really?”

  “Yup. Thanksgiving is generally a busy time for us. We’re at the tail end of duck season, and deer season started this month. When people have time off work, they tend to get outside if the weather is nice.”

  “Yeah, we’ve had an unusually mild fall this year,” Erin agreed.

  “And I spent today with my family,” Conor continued. “My mom outdid herself with the spread this year.”

  Erin nodded, even though she wasn’t exactly sure what he meant. She couldn’t remember the last Thanksgiving meal she’d had. Okay, that was a lie. She’d been eight. The last holiday she’d spent with her dad before he’d left. She cleared her throat and made small talk. “You’re close with your mom?”

  “Yup. My parents are the best. They’ve been married for forty years and act like newlyweds.”

  A pang of jealousy swamped Erin, but she beat it down and asked, “You have any brothers or sisters?”

  “Two sisters,” he replied. “Younger. They’re busybodies, but they mean well.”

  Erin swallowed hard. “You sound like you’re close.”

  “They’re everything to me,” Conor said easily. “They were pains in my butt growing up, but at two and four years younger than me, I did my best to look after them.”

  “And they were there today?”

  “Of course. It’s Thanksgiving. Karen is the youngest at thirty-one, and she’s not married yet, although if the way her boyfriend was acting is any indication, it’s gonna happen sooner rather than later. And Mary, my other sister, was there with her husband and two kids. They’re hellions, but they make holidays fun.”

  Holidays were miserable for her, so Erin couldn’t compare what he was talking about to anything. “Hmmm.”

  “You spend the day with family before or after your nap?” Conor asked.

  Just the thought of her mother made Erin’s chest tighten, and a feeling of being inadequate swamped through her. Every time she thought about her mom, she felt that way. She shrugged. “Nope. I don’t have any family. I spent the day preparing for the trip, making sure I had all the forms required by the university, and getting the van and canoes ready to go.”

  Erin felt a warmth on her arm. She looked down in surprise and saw Conor’s hand lying atop the long-sleeve T-shirt on her forearm. “I’m sorry. If I’d known, I would’ve invited you over. My mom would’ve loved to meet you.”

  “I don’t really do holidays,” Erin blurted, then winced. It sounded bad when she said it out loud. “I mean, since it’s only me, it’s just silly to get all wrapped up in them. I usually work or do trips like this. It lets the other faculty members spend time with their loved ones.”

  Conor’s hand tightened and he said softly, “I’m officially inviting you over to my parents’ house for Christmas then. No one should be alone at Christmas.”

  The long-ago Christmas when she was eight flitted through Erin’s head, and she gave Conor what she knew was a pathetic smile. “There’s the exit. You want to try to wake up the guys?”

  He stared at her for a long moment before squeezing her forearm in the sweetest gesture, then nodded. “Sure. I can do that.”

  “Thanks.”

  As if he knew she was thanking him for dropping the subject of Christmas, Conor slowly brought his hand up to the side of her head and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “You’re welcome.”

  Then he turned and roused the boys in the back of the van.

  Erin took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on the road. She could still feel Conor’s light touch. It had been so long since she’d been touched with such gentleness.

  He’s just being himself. He’s so far out of your league it’s not even funny. He wouldn’t want to be anywhere near you if he knew how you used to look. That you can’t sit down and eat with his family. That you’re a thirty-five-year-old virgin. Don’t read anything into his actions, Erin. You’ll just set yourself up for heartbreak.

  Her mini pep talk done, Erin eased the van and trailer into the gas station. Once they got to Big Bend, she could concentrate on getting the group ready to go rather than how Conor made her feel. Asking him to come along on the trip was the worst idea ever.

  2

  Agreeing to go on the canoe trip was the best idea ever. Conor happily stood by the gas pumps and filled the van while Erin went inside to use the restroom.

  She was such an enigma. There were times she seemed so strong and with it, then he’d get a glimpse of the unsure and vulnerable woman lurking underneath the surface. It was that woman he wanted to get to know. Oh, he liked the take-charge bartender and professor, but Conor could tell there was so much more to Erin. She had such expressive eyes, and when she’d looked at him and admitted that she didn’t “do” holidays, he wanted to take her in his arms and tell her everything would be all right, that she could lean on him and he wouldn’t let her down.

  He’d been attracted to her from the first moment he’d seen her. But the more he got to know her, the more he realized it wasn’t her physical features that turned him on, it was who she was as a person.

  Oh, she was good looking, there was no doubt. She was tall—he’d al

ways liked tall women. Her light brown hair was medium length, long enough to leave down and frame her face, but she usually had it up in some sort of ponytail. Her unique green eyes shone with laughter when she joked around with Sophie or some of the other women in his group of friends. She was slender, especially for her height, but she went out of her way to hide her assets.

  Conor knew it was insane, but he wanted Erin Gardner more than he’d ever wanted anything in his entire life. He’d watched her at The Sloppy Cow for months now. She was generous and intuitive. She knew how to diffuse situations that had the potential to get out of control. She could handle bullies, handsy men, patrons who had drunk too much, and still had the compassion to bring a plate of food to the homeless man who occasionally hung around the back of the bar.

  But when he tried to flirt with her, tried to let her know he wanted to get to know her better, she acted as if no one had ever told her how pretty she was before. Like she had no idea how to respond. It had taken him a month or so to realize she wasn’t rebuffing him, but honestly had no clue how to flirt. The more he paid attention, the more he realized when it came to male-female interaction, she was as innocent as a teenager just entering the dating fray.

  And that made him feel protective toward her. No, more than that. It made him want to beat the shit out of anyone who said or did anything out of line when it came to her. Erin was a breath of fresh air. Innocent. She was a rarity in his world, and he wanted to cherish her, show her that he could be the kind of man who would treat her like a queen.

  He had no idea what her story was, but it was more than obvious she had one.

  So when she’d taken a deep breath and invited him to go on the canoe trip with her one night at the bar, he’d immediately agreed, knowing he’d do whatever it took to get the time off work to go. It had taken a bit of wrangling, but he didn’t regret it. The three hours they’d been together so far had been enlightening, and he’d learned more about her than he’d found out in months of talking to her at the bar.

  “If you want to go inside, I can finish that,” she said from beside him.

  Conor turned to see Erin standing next to him. She was shorter than he was, but not by a lot. He figured she was probably around five-nine or so. A perfect complement to his six-one. Her hair was lying down around her shoulders for once. It was slightly curly, and his fingers itched to reach up and let one of her curls wrap around his hand. Her unique jade-green eyes looked at him with sincerity.

  She had a runner’s body. Even if she hadn’t told him she liked to run, he would’ve guessed it. She had a pair of expensive shoes on her feet that screamed “runner” rather than “I sometimes jog on the weekends.” He had the same brand back home in his closet.

  In all the time he’d known her, he hadn’t seen much of her body. She always wore long-sleeve shirts and slacks. Even though they lived in Texas, and even in the summer, she’d worn the long-sleeve shirts. Some were V-necked, giving a hint of her curves, and others were boat or regular scoop neck. They were light, not heavy, and hugged her trim body, but Conor longed to see more skin than just her hands, neck, and face.

  “Conor?”

  “Sorry,” he told her, mentally shaking his head. “I got this. What kind of man would I be if I let a lady pump gas?”

  “One who wants to use the restroom and get something to eat?” she immediately retorted.

  “That was a rhetorical question, bright eyes. Hear me now. You will never pump gas when I’m with you.”

  She stood next to the van looking perplexed and irritated at the same time. It made him want to pull her into his arms, but he refrained, barely.

  “I’m perfectly able to do it myself. Have been doing it my entire life, in fact.”

  “I have no doubt you’re a champion gas pumper, but the fact remains that it’s not gentlemanly to let a woman fill up the gas tank.”

  “I don’t think it has anything to do with being a gentleman,” she continued to argue.

  Conor leaned into her, and was rewarded when her beautiful eyes opened wide at his action. “It has everything to do with the fact that I want to do this for you. All the crap jobs you’ve had to do by yourself your entire life are now mine to take care of for you…at least when I’m around. You don’t feel like doing something, all you got to do is call me. Changing tires, washing your car, hanging pictures on your walls, mowing the grass, raking, even changing lightbulbs. I want to take care of that for you.”

  Conor didn’t think Erin was even breathing. He brought a hand up to her face and ran his pinky finger down her slightly upturned nose. “Breathe before you pass out, bright eyes,” he whispered.

  “Why are you calling me that?” she asked.

  “Because you have the most amazing eyes I’ve ever seen. They’re bright green.”

  “Oh, well, I’ve always thought they were weird. Conor, I don’t mind changing light bulbs…but there isn’t any grass to mow at my apartment. The ground crew does that kind of thing. But believe it or not, I hate getting my car washed. It just seems like a waste. I mean, I’ll clean it, but then drive through a mud puddle and it’ll get dirty again. It just doesn’t seem like there’s a point. But if you really want, you can do that for me.”

  He chuckled. “Done.”

  “Uh…why are we talking about this?”

  “Because you asked why I wouldn’t let you pump gas.”

  “You’re confusing,” Erin informed him.

  Conor smiled and leaned away from her and reached for the pump, which had clicked done while they’d talked. “It’s okay. You’ll get used to me.”

  “Whatever,” Erin mumbled under her breath and reached for the door handle.

  “You didn’t get anything from inside?” Conor asked. “I’m going to grab a coffee. You want anything to snack on?”

  “No.”

  There was so much more to her answer than that one word. It was the flat and final way she’d said it that alerted him to the fact he’d inadvertently brought up a touchy subject, so Conor let it go. He had all weekend to learn more about her. He didn’t need to know everything right this second, even if he wanted to. But he filed her answer away in the back of his mind.

  He was observant, crazily so. All the other game wardens had commented on it at one point or another. He could read things in interrogations and out in the field that other officers missed. He could almost always tell when someone was lying. He’d even been asked by some of his law enforcement friends to unofficially sit in on interviews to give his thoughts on them.

  “I’ll be right back. I’ll corral the guys while I’m in there.”

  “They were ransacking the chip section last I saw them,” Erin told him.

  Conor grinned. Funny. The glimpses of her sense of humor that came through now and then were like precious gold to him.

  “I’ll do my best to keep them from buying them out.”

  “And keep them away from the candy aisle too, would ya? I’d hate to have to postpone our trip because of a sugar coma.”

  He knew his smile was goofy, but couldn’t help it. “Sure thing, bright eyes.” Then he turned and strode toward the convenience store.

  He grabbed some snacks he knew the other guys would eat and that they could take with them on the river and headed back to the van. Erin was sitting in her seat going over the map on her phone.

  “All set?” he asked.

  “Yup. We’re good.”

  They sat in comfortable silence as she pulled onto the interstate again. Conor thought about their earlier conversation and had so many questions he wanted to ask. But he also wanted to keep her relaxed, as she was now. He rested his head on the back of his seat and found he was perfectly happy just watching her. The faint glow from the dashboard and oncoming cars gave him enough light to see her with. And he liked what he saw.

  Two hours later, Conor woke up from his nap when the van hit a pothole.

  Erin’s guilty eyes met his and she said, “Sorry,” in a low voice, obviously hoping not to wake the sleeping men in the back.

  “It’s okay. I was having a weird dream, it was time for me to wake up anyway.”

  “You get those too?”

  It was a telling question, and Conor wanted to demand she share her dreams with him, but he refrained, barely. “Occasionally. Where are we?”

  “Just pulled onto 385. We’ve got about another hour to go.”

  “We’re making good time.”

  Erin shrugged. “I’ve got this route memorized by now. Although obviously not where all the potholes are.”

  He chuckled softly. “Obviously.”

  They grinned at each other.

  “Have you been to Big Bend a lot?” Erin asked him.

  He rejoiced in every question because it meant she wanted to know more about him. At least he hoped that’s what it meant. “A couple of times. It’s obviously pretty far out here, so I don’t get to this neck of the woods as much as I’d like. But I love it out here. It’s so different from San Antonio. It’s what I would think life on a different planet would look like. Dry, weird scrub bushes, and beautiful in its own way.”

  “I think so too,” Erin agreed softly. “I know some people hate it, but there’s something so…untainted about the entire area that I love.”

  “Untainted…interesting word. But I like it,” Conor told her. “You like camping?”

  “Love it,” she replied immediately. “My dad used to take me all the time.”

  “Did he pass away?”

  “What?”

  “Your dad, did he pass away?” Conor repeated. “You said that you didn’t have any family, so I just assumed…I’m sorry if I overstepped.” He didn’t like the pained look on her face at his question. He mentally kicked himself for pushing too fast for information. But he was like a sponge, wanting to soak up every scrap of information he could about her.

  “No…it’s okay. I just don’t talk about him much. He disappeared when I was eight.”

  “Disappeared?”

  “Yeah. I woke up one morning and my mom said he’d left us. I never saw him again.”

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