by Susan Stoker
Erin wasn’t sure about meeting his family, but she was sure about wanting to see him again. “I’d like that.”
He sighed in relief. As if he hadn’t been sure she’d agree. “Good.” Then he shifted and carefully stood. He helped her stand and wrapped an arm around her waist as he turned them back toward camp.
They walked in silence, but it was comfortable, not awkward.
Erin mentally shook her head, wondering how the heck this had happened. She had a date. Oh, it wasn’t set in stone yet, was still kind of vague, but she had hopes that Conor had been serious. That he really did want to see her again.
She didn’t remember the rest of the night. Didn’t remember what she said to the guys as she and Conor came back into camp. Didn’t remember saying goodnight to anyone. When she was lying in her sleeping bag in her tent, all she could remember was the feel of Conor’s lips pressed to her own. How he’d held her against him as he’d kissed her. She’d never forget it, not ever.
6
The next day passed in a flash. They packed up camp, had a leisurely canoe about two miles downriver to the take-out point. Then, while she and the others worked on getting everything situated for the trip home, Conor hitchhiked back to the ranger station. When he arrived back, the trash had been thrown away and their bags were lined up, ready to be put back into the van.
Loading the canoes was easy with all five men helping, and Erin tied them securely down for the trip home. Before she knew it, they were on their way.
Erin couldn’t remember ever laughing as much as she did on the six-hour drive back to San Antonio. Alex, Matthew, Jose, and Chad were hilarious, joking and laughing with each other, and even including Erin in their good-natured teasing. But it was Conor who made the drive memorable. Every time she glanced his way, he was looking at her. He’d smile in a secret way that made her remember every second of the time they’d spent together over the last couple of days. Especially their intimate kiss last night.
When they stopped to get gas, he once again refused to allow her to man the pump, but this time she noticed the other men observing them. Thinking that Conor was a hell of a role model, she gave in graciously. She used the restroom and gathered some snacks for the guys, and a bottle of water for herself.
They got back to the UTSA rec center around six. The college kids waved goodbye and disappeared into the night. Then it was only her and Conor left.
“I had a good time,” he said as soon as they were alone.
“Me too.”
“Thank you for inviting me.”
“You’re welcome. I’m glad it worked out.”
“You owe me,” he said, his lips quirking up.
“For what?” Erin asked.
“For making you look good in front of the guys. I did everything you told me to and we didn’t tip once.”
Erin grinned at him now. “Is that right?”
“Yup.”
“So what do I owe you?”
Conor took a step toward her, getting into her space. Erin’s smile died. She’d been teasing him, but the look on his face was anything but teasing now. The evening light was dying, and the darkness, combined with the fact they’d spent the last three days together twenty-four/seven, made the moment very intimate.
“I’ll start with a kiss.”
Erin glanced around them. They were truly alone for the first time since they’d left three days ago. She wanted to be sophisticated, mysterious, and all the other traits she assumed people who had more experience than she did embodied, but the only thing she could squeak out was, “Please.”
One of Conor’s hands went under her chin and lifted her head to his. The other snaked around and landed on her lower back. He pulled her into him at the same time his head lowered to hers.
Before she could freak out about where her own hands should go or how she should kiss him, his lips were on hers and she couldn’t think at all.
The kiss was just as explosive as it had been the night before, but this time they were touching from hips to chest. She could feel the warmth of Conor’s body against her own in the chilly evening air. She tilted her head automatically this time, not needing his direction.
They made out in the middle of the parking lot for several moments. Each lost in the feelings coursing through their bodies and enjoying the connection.
Conor finally pulled back and ran his hand over her hair reverently. “Go out with me.”
“Okay.” Erin almost didn’t recognize her voice.
“What’s your schedule like?”
Erin tried to get her brain to work. “Um…I’m working Monday, Wednesday, and Friday nights at The Sloppy Cow this week. Also, since I took this weekend off, I’ve got Saturday night too.”
“Damn. I’ve got Monday and Tuesday day shifts, but then I start nights on Wednesday for a week.”
Erin tried to keep the disappointment from her face, but obviously failed, because Conor leaned forward and rested his forehead against her own and said, “Just because our schedules don’t mesh doesn’t mean we aren’t going to see each other.”
“How?”
“Where there’s a will, there’s a way,” Conor replied calmly. “We both need to eat, so maybe we can meet up at lunch or dinner somewhere in there.”
Erin pulled back and looked up at him solemnly. “I don’t do meal get-togethers.”
Conor blinked down at her, startled for a beat, then said, “Then we don’t need to eat. We can just meet and talk.”
Erin closed her eyes. Shit, she was a moron. She was embarrassed and tried to explain. “It’s just—”
Conor’s finger landed on her lips, silencing her explanation. “It’s fine. If you think I haven’t noticed that eating around others makes you uncomfortable, you’re wrong. I don’t care what we do, bright eyes, I just want to spend time with you. I like spending time with you. I just don’t want to leave here today without at least one time and place scheduled where I can see you again. I fully plan on calling you, and texting and probably emailing too, but it’s not the same as getting to see you in person. Seeing your smile and hearing your laugh. I’m addicted to you, Erin, so no matter what I need to do to see your beautiful eyes in person, I’m willing to do it.”
“Oh.” It wasn’t the most eloquent response, but it was all Erin could manage at the moment.
Conor dropped his finger from her mouth and clasped his hands together at the small of her back. He held her to him and didn’t seem at all nervous or insecure about the fact they were plastered together in a public parking lot.
“I teach in the mornings, but I’m done after my office hours at two.” She looked up at him and bit her lip before suggesting, “Maybe we can do something in the afternoon on Wednesday before you go to work and I have to be at the bar?”
“Yes,” was his immediate response. “And Thursday and Friday too.”
Erin’s lips twitched. “You’re assuming I’ll want to see you again after Wednesday.”
“Yes, I am. Because I can’t be the only one feeling the connection between us.”
Erin slowly shook her head as she held his eyes.
“Right. I’ve never felt this with anyone else, Erin. We just spent three days together and I’m dreading saying goodbye to you. I’m greedy. I want more. I want to spend all my days with you, laughing and just talking. But I also want to take you to bed. Spend my nights with you plastered to my side. I want to know what turns you on and what makes you moan in pleasure. I want it all. No, I need it all.”
“Conor,” Erin protested, blushing in embarrassment, and at the same time shifting where she stood in desire.
“Tell me I’m not alone in feeling that way,” Conor demanded.
Erin looked up at him. “You’re not alone,” she obediently repeated. “But…I have to tell you something.” She stopped, not at all sure she was doing the right thing.
“What is it, bright eyes?” Conor asked tenderly. “You can tell me anything. It’s not going to ch
ange the way I feel.”
She decided the best way to deal with the issue was just to say it outright. “I haven’t done this before.”
“What?”
She brought a hand up, gesturing between them. “This. Dated.”
His body went hard and he narrowed his eyes at her. “But you’ve been out with a guy.” It wasn’t a question, but it still was.
Erin shook her head and tried to explain without really explaining. “Not really. I wasn’t popular in high school and when I was in college, all I was interested in was graduating. I didn’t have time for parties or looking for a guy. Then I started working and had some medical issues. I just…” Her voice trailed off. The more she tried to explain, the more pathetic she sounded.
Conor moved then. He took her head in both of his hands and tilted it up so she had no choice but to look at him. “I want to know more about everything you just said…I want to know everything about you. But I can be patient. You can tell me what you want, when you want. But, bright eyes, what are you saying? That you haven’t been with a man before? That you’re a virgin?”
Relieved that he’d guessed and she didn’t have to actually say it, Erin simply nodded.
When Conor didn’t respond, just looked at her with his chest heaving with increased breaths and his nostrils flaring, she got defensive and felt the need to clarify. “I just wanted to tell you in case you…you know…weren’t interested anymore.”
“Not interested?” he said, his eyebrows drawing down in confusion.
“I don’t know the rules,” Erin admitted. “To dating. You know, what’s appropriate and what’s not. Am I supposed to let you touch me after two dates, three? And texting…how much is too much? Can I use emojis, or do I have to wait until we’ve been seeing each other for several weeks?”
“What the fuck is an emoji?”
Erin didn’t think, if his tone was anything to go by, that this was going well. “Uh…it’s the little pictures that you can include in emails and texts. You know, smiley faces, hearts, animals…stuff like that.”
Conor didn’t respond verbally, but tilted his head up and looked at the night sky as if searching for Divine intervention.
Erin tried to take a step back, but Conor didn’t let go of her face. At her movement, he looked down at her again. “What else?”
“What else what?” Erin asked in confusion.
“What else don’t you know about dating?”
“Oh, uh…well, everything. I don’t know when it’s appropriate to meet your family. How often we’re supposed to see each other during the week. If you want me to touch you when we’re in public. And I know I’m not that good at kissing, but I think I’ll be a fast learner. I mean, even from last night to today, I think I’ve gotten better…” Her voice trailed off. She was nervous, and didn’t understand the intense look on Conor’s face.
“God. You’re killing me, bright eyes. First of all, I can’t believe you haven’t been on a date. You’re gorgeous. What the fuck is wrong with the men you’ve been around?”
“I haven’t always looked like this,” Erin admitted immediately.
“I don’t give a shit,” was Conor’s response. “You’re an amazing person. Funny, smart, generous, giving…any man would be honored to have you by his side. I know I sure as hell am. But more than that, you shine with an inner light that’s impossible to miss.”
“Conor—” Erin protested, knowing she was blushing.
He didn’t let her continue. “And as far as rules to dating go? There aren’t any. Not between us. You do whatever you want. If you want to send me a text with a thousand fucking emojis, go for it. I’ll think it’s cute as fuck. You want to call me five minutes after I drop you off? Do it. Because I know I’ll already be missing you. There’s no rulebook when it comes to us, Erin. I’ll teach you everything you need to know about dating. And since we’re talking about it…” Conor moved his hands then. He wrapped one around her waist and pressed on her lower back, bringing her into full contact along his body. The other snaked under her hair and landed on her nape. His thumb brushed back and forth against the sensitive skin there, making goosebumps race down Erin’s arms.
He brushed his lips against hers in a barely there caress and continued. “I’m fucking ecstatic that no one has touched you. I’ve never been the kind of person to care about a woman’s sexual background. If she’d been with a thousand men or just one, it didn’t matter to me. She was with me at the moment and that was all that mattered. But I find, knowing that you haven’t been with anyone else, that it’s sexy as hell.”
“It doesn’t turn you off?” Erin asked softly.
“Fuck no! Does this feel like I’m turned off?” he asked, pressing his hips into her.
She could feel his erection against her and shook her head.
“Right. I’m turned the fuck on. Just the thought of introducing you to the pleasures that can be had in my bed has me on edge.”
“I know what it’s all about,” Erin told him. “I mean, I’ve seen videos, and I’ve been going to my gynecologist for years. I don’t think I even have a hymen anymore.”
“Oh, bright eyes, you might know the mechanics, but you have no idea how amazing I’m going to make you feel.”
She paused for a moment, wanting to make sure he completely understood. “I’ve had an orgasm, Conor. I might be a thirty-five-year-old virgin, but I have a vibrator. Technically, I suppose I shouldn’t even say I’m a virgin.”
“Honey, the thought of you using a sex toy on yourself makes me crazy. I want to watch you get off that way—but you’re wrong. If you haven’t been penetrated by a real-live cock, you’re still a virgin.”
Erin tried to hold back her giggle, but she couldn’t.
“What’s funny?”
“A real-live cock?” she asked between giggles.
“Yup,” he told her, smiling. “My real-live cock is gonna be the first to breach your virgin pussy. You’ll come for the first time on my dick and you’ll realize just how pathetic a vibrator can be in comparison.”
Erin froze, turned on by his words. She supposed she should’ve been offended by his frank speaking, but she wasn’t. She shifted in his hold and felt the wetness between her legs. “Are you allowed to say that this early in our relationship?”
“No rules, bright eyes,” Conor said. “We can both say whatever we want, whenever we want. Societal rules be damned. It’s just us. If I want to tell you how proud and excited I am that I get to be your first, then I will. If you want to tell me that you got off while using that vibrator of yours, you can. No holds barred between us. Okay?”
“Okay,” Erin immediately agreed. “But, you’ll tell me if I do something crazy?”
“Like?”
She bit her lip. “Well…I don’t know. That’s why you’ll need to tell me.”
“I’ll let you know,” Conor said. “But you should be aware that I love your enthusiasm. I don’t think there’s anything you could do that would chase me away.”
“I’m not ready to have sex with you yet,” Erin blurted.
Conor didn’t even tense. “I know. And now that I know you haven’t done this before, I’m not inclined to rush our physical relationship, bright eyes. I want to get to know you better, ease you into that part of dating.”
“But…” Erin looked away from Conor’s intense eyes for a moment, then took a deep breath and looked back at him. “That doesn’t mean I’m not willing to explore. I like kissing you. I like the way you feel against me.”
“Good. And for the record, I like kissing you too.” And with that said, Conor leaned forward and kissed her. His hands held her tightly against him as he devoured her mouth. After several long moments of deep kisses, Erin pulled back.
“So…Wednesday afternoon?”
“Yeah. That sounds amazing.”
“I thought of something.”
“What’s that, bright eyes?”
“Do you run in the mornings?”
Conor pulled back then and looked her in the eye. He reached out and grabbed her fidgeting hands in his own. “Yeah, usually, except when I’m working the night shift, obviously.”
“Me too. Do you think…you want to go together?”
“Yeah. Are you any good?”
Erin smiled. “I’m good.”
Conor returned the grin. “We’ll see then, won’t we?”
“It’s on,” Erin said in a stronger tone, feeling less off-kilter now that they weren’t talking about her virginity and they weren’t kissing.
“Tomorrow?”
“Sure. Want to meet here? UTSA has a track, but there’s a five-mile route that I do most mornings.”
“What time?”
“Six? My first class is at eight, and that gives me time to shower after working out.”
“Perfect. My shift starts at nine. It’ll give me time to get home after our run and still get to work on time.”
They smiled at each other for a long moment before Conor broke it. “I like you, Erin Gardner. I’m incredibly excited to get to know you better.”
“Am I allowed to say I like you too, Conor Paxton?”
“Yeah, you’re absolutely allowed to say that,” he said, then cleared his throat. “And with that, I need to get going. Are you returning the canoes tonight?”
Erin shook her head. “No, the outdoor rec place is closed. I’ll leave them here and take care of it tomorrow after my first class.”
“You need any help?”
Erin appreciated him asking, but quickly reassured him. “No, I’m good. Thanks though.”
“Any time, bright eyes. Thank you for inviting me.”
“Thanks for accepting.”
They stared at each other for a minute. Finally, Conor grinned ruefully and said, “I’d stand here all night looking at you, but I really do need to get going.”
“I know.”
Conor dropped her hands and took a step back, reaching in his pocket for his keys. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
