CHERUB: Man vs Beast

by Robert Muchamore

  Zara was at the bottom of the stairs, holding Meatball in a makeshift dog carrier that consisted of the washing basket with a couple of towels folded up in the bottom. ‘If you’re ready, we’d better run. Do you need a ride anywhere, Ryan?’

  ‘I’ll be all right,’ Ryan said, as Lauren ran down the stairs, dabbing her face with the tissue. ‘I’ll stay with Lou for a few days until I sort myself out. He’s coming over to pick me up when he finishes work.’

  Lauren stroked Meatball for comfort as the car pulled off the driveway and the little cottage receded into the distance. She saw a few familiar faces holding placards as they drove past the gates of the Malarek Research compound for the final time and felt sadder still when she realised that she hadn’t said goodbye to Stuart.

  *

  James had learned to drive, busted out of a drug dealer’s compound in a Range Rover and driven across Arizona and California with thousands of law enforcement officers looking for him. But this was the first time he’d ever actually got in a car for the comparatively simple purpose of driving home.

  As the car crawled through the rush-hour jam on the motorway outside Leeds, he listened to the drama unfold over the car radio. He’d heard the dramatic news that Nick Cobb had been delivered to hospital by a young terrorist, then that two vanloads of AFA members had been arrested by armed police as they attempted to escape a farm near Rothbury.

  Next it was announced that one of the women arrested was the daughter of eighties pop star Joe Jules and to cap it all a seventeen-year-old suspect named Kyle Wilson had killed himself with a concealed knife while sitting in the back of a police car taking him to a Tyneside police station.

  James was particularly amused by this detail and wondered what excuse they’d dream up for his own disappearance. His mood was only dented by his dead mobile and the flickering low-petrol light on the dashboard.

  He pulled in at the next services and couldn’t decide if he was getting stared at for looking suspiciously young as he filled up. Fortunately, the forecourt was almost empty and the sour-faced cashier was only interested in the microwaved chicken and mushroom pie he was cramming down his neck.

  After refuelling, James parked outside the food and shopping area. He bought a map in the gift shop and studied his route back to campus while he sat in Burger King eating a Double Whopper, special-ordered without mayonnaise. Before leaving, he called Kerry from the payphone to tell her that he was OK and that he reckoned he’d arrive home at about eight o’clock.

  37. HOME

  Zara glanced at her watch when the people carrier got close to campus. It was just past seven.

  ‘Do you mind if I stop by my house for a few minutes?’ she asked. ‘Ewart will be putting the kids to bed about now and I’ve not seen much of them lately.’

  Lauren was half asleep in the middle row of seats and rubbed her eyes as she told Zara that she didn’t mind. The Askers lived in a secluded bungalow about two kilometres from campus and Ewart brought his son and daughter on to the doorstep as he heard Zara pull up.

  Tiffany could only manage a few steps unassisted, but Joshua ran out dressed in a Buzz Lightyear pyjama top with matching shorts.

  ‘Is this home now, Mummy?’ the toddler asked.

  ‘Yes, I’m back home now sweetheart,’ Zara grinned, as she picked her son up and gave him a kiss.

  ‘Where’s my present?’

  ‘Ahh,’ Zara said uncertainly. ‘I’m afraid I couldn’t go to the shops today. So how about I take you to the shops tomorrow and let you pick your own present?’

  ‘No,’ Joshua whined, screwing up his face. ‘I want it now.’

  Luckily, Lauren had put Meatball on his lead and was taking him out of the car to stretch his legs.

  ‘Nice dog,’ Joshua grinned, pointing at the ground to signal that he wanted to get down and play.

  Meatball looked suspicious as Joshua came towards him.

  ‘Stroke him nicely,’ Lauren said. ‘Don’t make any sudden noises or you’ll scare him.’

  As Joshua ran his hand along Meatball’s back, the little dog tipped his head forward and licked Joshua’s toes. Tiffany screamed because she was missing out on the action, and Ewart held her up by her hands so that she could walk towards Meatball and her big brother.

  ‘He’s a beautiful little beagle,’ Ewart said admiringly. ‘I had a golden retriever when I was a red shirt.’

  Lauren thought of something as she watched Zara’s family making a fuss of Meatball. ‘Why don’t you take him?’ she asked. ‘Meatball’s quite sensitive after all he’s been through and I don’t fancy having him pulled around by a bunch of red shirts. Some of those little kids are lunatics, especially the boys.’

  Zara and Ewart exchanged a look.

  ‘What do you think?’ Ewart asked, as he crouched down and gently bounced his daughter on his knee. ‘We did talk about having a dog; and you won’t be away so much once you’re made chairman.’

  ‘If I’m made chairman,’ Zara said pointedly.

  Ewart smiled. ‘Mac seems sure you’ve got the job.’

  Joshua had cottoned on to the conversation. ‘Can I have him?’

  Zara and Ewart smiled at each other.

  ‘You know Lauren, that’s a really kind offer. We’d love to take Meatball,’ Zara said. ‘And we live near enough to campus that you can still visit him and take him out for walks and things.’

  ‘Cool,’ Lauren smiled. ‘Can I bring Bethany over too? She’s heard about Meatball, but she’s not seen him yet.’

  Ewart crouched down and looked at Joshua. ‘What do you say to Lauren for giving you Meatball?’

  ‘Thank you,’ Joshua grinned.

  ‘Oh, there’s one condition though,’ Lauren said. ‘He’s not allowed to eat meat.’

  ‘Eh?’

  ‘I’ve got a few packets of vegetarian dog food in the car and there’s places on the Internet where you can buy more if you can’t get it in the supermarket.’

  Zara gave Lauren a smile. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll make sure Ewart doesn’t sneak him any scraps of steak.’

  *

  James got lost a couple of times and finally arrived at the gates of campus shortly before nine. He parked the Mini outside the main building and blasted the horn a couple of times in the hope that someone would come downstairs and check out the car.

  At this time on a summer evening, he’d expected to see older kids still out on the tennis courts and football pitches, but everywhere seemed empty.

  ‘Where are they all?’ James asked, as he stepped up to the reception desk inside.

  ‘Charity five-a-side tournament in the gymnasium,’ Violet, the elderly receptionist, explained. ‘I hardly recognised you with the brown hair, James.’

  James grinned. ‘Does it suit me?’

  ‘I’m sure you’d look handsome whatever you did with your hair, but you don’t smell so great. I’m not sure about the blood on your shirt either.’

  ‘Oh,’ James gasped, realising that he hadn’t showered since leaving Corbyn Copse two days earlier. ‘I’d better go up for a quick scrub before I go find the gang.’

  ‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’ Violet said, as James headed for the lift.

  ‘Am I?’

  ‘I’ll have the car keys, thank you very much. We wouldn’t want you joyriding with your mates, would we?’

  ‘Would I do a thing like that?’ James grinned, feigning innocence as he dumped the key fob on the reception desk.

  ‘I’m sure butter wouldn’t melt,’ Violet said. ‘And all those appointments in Dr McAfferty’s office have been the result of simple misunderstandings.’

  ‘Exactly,’ James nodded, as he noticed the lift doors opening and jogged off.

  He headed up to the sixth floor. Most of the rooms were open because it was warm, but nobody was inside. He was especially disappointed when he leaned into Kerry’s empty room, but it still gave him a rush seeing all her things, breathing her smell and knowing that he’d be s
eeing her as soon as he’d scrubbed up and put on clean clothes.

  He realised Zara and Lauren were already back when he found his room unlocked and his hurriedly-packed holdall and a bag of dirty washing standing in the doorway. As he turned through his door, he noticed Kyle, spread across his bed in the room directly opposite.

  ‘Hey,’ James said, leaning into Kyle’s doorway. ‘You got back quick.’

  Kyle propped himself up so that he could see James. ‘Helicopter from Newcastle airport; dropped me down on the pad at the back of the rugby fields.’

  James realised that Kyle didn’t look too happy. If he hadn’t been crying, he was close to it. ‘What’s the matter?’

  ‘Just … Tom,’ he said.

  ‘You spent a lot of time hanging out with him, didn’t you?’

  Kyle nodded solemnly. ‘Remember when you said that Kerry wasn’t the most beautiful girl in the world, but that she was special because everything clicks when you’re together? Well, that’s how it felt when I was with Tom: driving around the countryside in his little MG, going to the cinema—’

  ‘Romping on my bed while I was stuck in school,’ James interrupted.

  Kyle laughed. ‘One time.’

  ‘Don’t worry about it,’ James said, shaking his head. ‘I never said sorry for how I acted that day. From now on, absolutely anyone can use my bed, just so long as they keep their underwear on.’

  Kyle grinned half heartedly. ‘One thing I won’t miss is that titchy cottage. The way we were all crammed in there, I’m amazed nobody came to blows.’

  ‘That’s true,’ James nodded. ‘I’m gonna take a quick shower and head over to the gymnasium to find the gang. You wanna come with me or are you happy being miserable?’

  ‘Might as well,’ Kyle said. ‘Can’t spend my whole life sitting around feeling sorry for myself, can I?’

  38. JET

  Two days later

  Provided they behave themselves, every cherub gets a five-week break at the CHERUB summer hostel on the Mediterranean island of C——. Kids who are late back from missions are flown out on regular, scheduled services, but the main flights that take half the population of campus in one go are put on by the Royal Air Force in one of its dilapidated Tristar jets.

  Designed for carrying soldiers, every expense had been spared. There was no entertainment system, the basic seats had torn covers, they didn’t recline and the bare metal floor was covered in sand and mud from soldiers’ boots. It was best not to put anything into the seatback pockets because years of accumulated orange peel and crumbs had sprouted mould and the ashtrays were still full, even though smoking on RAF jets had been banned years earlier.

  Not that any of the 116 cherubs on board cared. They wore shorts and T-shirts and were already tearing into the bagged lunches they’d been handed as they boarded the plane. There was screaming, shouting and occasional choruses of why are we waiting?

  They were stuck on the tarmac because one of the coaches bringing them to the airport had broken down and it had taken over an hour for the stricken passengers to be picked up in a stream of taxis. James and Kerry were among the last group to arrive and Lauren spotted them running up the steps from her window seat.

  ‘Looks like those two have finally come up for air,’ Lauren grinned.

  Bethany nodded her head, which had a paper crown and streamers dangling off it. ‘I saw them three times yesterday, and they were snogging every single time.’

  ‘Lucky James,’ said Rat, who was in the aisle seat.

  ‘Kerry looks so fit these days,’ Bruce added, from across the aisle.

  James stepped inside the plane and caught a none too pleasant odour from the toilets. As he walked down the left-hand aisle, he spotted a few people he hadn’t seen since arriving back. Bethany’s brother Jake grabbed his arm.

  ‘Thanks for helping us out in training,’ Jake said.

  James stopped walking and looked back at him. ‘I heard that you and Rat passed,’ he said. ‘Well done.’

  ‘Basic training’s a piece of cake,’ Jake grinned, dismissively waving his hand in front of his face as one of his little mates held out a PSP.

  ‘You didn’t look so confident when I last saw you,’ James smirked as he walked on.

  ‘Hold up,’ Jake said urgently. ‘Watch this clip, I guarantee you’ll love it.’

  ‘What is it?’ Kerry asked, as James grabbed the PSP off Jake and hit the play button.

  The little screen showed the familiar set of the Otis and Wendy Show. Otis made his lunge and the director zoomed in as James threw the punch at his nose. James was impressed by how brutal it made him look.

  ‘That was some bad punch,’ Jake smiled.

  James showed Jake and his friends the circular cuts where the handcuffs had cut his fingers. ‘And I’ve got the marks to prove it.’

  ‘Not as bad as the state of Otis Fox’s nose,’ Jake’s friend giggled.

  ‘I’ve got my PSP in my bag,’ James said. ‘Can I make a copy of that clip when we get to the hostel?’

  ‘Course you can.’

  Kerry gave James a disapproving look as they headed on down the aisle towards Lauren.

  ‘What have I done now?’ James asked.

  ‘Those two are only ten,’ Kerry tutted. ‘You shouldn’t be encouraging them.’

  ‘Jake doesn’t need any encouragement,’ James grinned. ‘He’s a total nutter already.’

  When they reached the row with Lauren, Bethany and Rat in it, James gave Rat a congratulatory high five for passing training as Kerry wished Bethany happy birthday.

  ‘Oh yeah, happy twelfth birthday,’ James said half heartedly. ‘Has Lauren talked you into becoming a veggie yet?’

  ‘Yes, as a matter of fact I have,’ Lauren grinned. ‘And Rat’s thinking about it too.’

  ‘Am I?’ Rat gasped.

  ‘You told me you were going to read the leaflets,’ Lauren said.

  ‘Yeah, but only to stop you from going on and on and on about it,’ Rat laughed.

  James nodded to Bruce, as Kyle stood up from a seat in the row behind Lauren. ‘Saved ’em for you,’ he said.

  ‘Put my bag in the overhead,’ Kerry said to James, handing it to him as she shuffled into the middle seat.

  ‘Anything else, madam?’ James sneered. ‘Duty free, hot towel, tea and crumpets?’

  As James opened the flap of the overhead compartment, a piercing scream hit him in the face. Several camera phones popped up and snapped his shocked expression as he stumbled back and dropped his bag.

  ‘Bloody hell,’ James gasped, clutching his chest with fright.

  Cheers erupted as a little red-shirt girl called Lyra dangled her legs off the side of the overhead bin and jumped down on to the metal floor.

  ‘Gotcha James,’ Lauren grinned, as Lyra collected half a dozen chocolate bars from James’ mates in return for the ten minutes she’d spent crammed into the overhead locker.

  ‘Show us,’ James said, grabbing Lauren’s phone and looking at the picture of his gawping mouth on the screen.

  He could see the funny side as he settled into his seat and buckled his belt.

  ‘Zara’s coming up the steps,’ Kyle announced. ‘Looks like she’s the last one.’

  Lauren glanced out of the window and saw Zara carrying a stroller up the steps. Ewart walked behind her with Joshua and Tiffany in his arms.

  ‘I wonder who’s looking after Meatball while they’re away,’ Lauren said.

  ‘Probably Mr Large,’ Kyle said. ‘He lives in the bungalow next to the Askers and he’s already got dogs.’

  ‘What?’ Lauren gasped. ‘Large’s dogs are dirty great massive bloody Rottweilers. They’ll eat him.’

  James giggled, ‘Large will have Meatball up at four o’clock every morning, making him run a little doggy assault course and doing doggy push-ups.’

  ‘Shut up, James,’ Lauren said, clearly worried.

  Kyle spoke reassuringly, ‘Seriously Lauren, don’t get ups
et about it. Large and his partner have got five or six dogs. I’ve seen them in town with their daughter and a little Jack Russell.’

  ‘Besides,’ Bethany said, ‘he’s hardly gonna let Thatcher and Saddam eat the chairman’s dog, is he?’

  James tutted. ‘Lauren, you weren’t supposed to go blabbing about that to Bethany.’

  ‘I didn’t tell her anything,’ Lauren said indignantly. ‘They announced that Zara’s the new chairman at dinner last night. You would have found out if you hadn’t been over at the lake with Kerry.’

  Kerry didn’t have a clue. ‘Zara’s the new chairman?’ she grinned.

  ‘Yep,’ Kyle nodded.

  ‘That’s so cool. I thought it was going to be some old fart from outside.’

  As Zara stepped on to the plane, everyone started clapping, cheering and chanting chairman, chairman, chairman. Zara broke into a big smile and turned bright red.

  ‘I hope you’re all this enthusiastic when you get in trouble,’ Zara said. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘How can she be the chairman?’ Rat asked.

  Lauren shrugged. ‘Maybe she’ll be the chairwoman.’

  ‘Or she could have a sex change,’ James said.

  The pilot’s voice came over the intercom. ‘Good morning, everyone. I’ve just been told that all our passengers are on board. The stairs are being rolled back and the cockpit doors are closing as we speak. Could all passengers fasten their seat-belts, secure their tray tables and remain seated until we’ve reached a cruising altitude. We’ve been given an immediate take-off slot, so we should be taking to the air in under five minutes.’

  A big cheer went up as the plane started to roll. They were flying out of a small military airfield near to CHERUB campus and it took less than a minute to taxi to the beginning of the runway. After a jarring halt and a brief pause, the pilot opened the engines up to full blast and all manner of interior fittings began flapping and groaning as the aged jet belted down the runway.

  ‘You know it’s so cool,’ James grinned to Kerry. ‘You, me, Lauren, Kyle and Bruce all getting to go to the hostel at the same time this year.’