Not Your Average Princess

by Kylee Kosoff

  HENRI

  “It’s not so bad a place to live,” Sebastian said staring out at the deep blue sea with me. He was a little red crab with a Jamaican accent who had appointed himself as my personal tour guide.

  “It is pretty,” I agreed.

  “Beeaauutifuul,” He disagreed.

  Staring at the way the sun ricocheted off of the waves I almost agreed.

  “But not home eh?”

  “Not my home.”

  “Could it be?” he asked.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Because of him?”

  “Him?” I asked.

  “De pirate with de shining hook.”

  I smiled softly.

  “You love him, no?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “Because you down here and he up there?”

  “That’s part of the problem.”

  “There’s more?”

  “He doesn’t love me,” I admitted.

  “How you to say?”

  “I was just the princess who broke his curse.”

  “De princess who saved his life.”

  “It doesn’t matter as you said I’m down here, and he’s up there.”

  Hook

  Nothing feels stranger than having two worlds collide. As a youth I had been raised royal, but as a man I had become a pirate.

  Now my family and my crew were standing on my deck.

  My mother and father eyed my callous pirates warily.

  My first mate Smee glared at Peter.

  Grim looked like she was itching to punch Wendy who was just as beautiful as I had remembered, but her eyes were colder.

  “Welcome to the Jolly Roger.” I smirked. That was as hospitable as I would be. Turning to my crew, I started barking orders. “Get to work you, mangy dogs!”

  They scampered off and unfurled the sails. The wind pushed the ship forward, and the salty air splashed around us.

  I took a deep breath of the ocean air. This was where I belonged, “Avast! Ye mateys, veer due west!”

  “Aye, aye, Captain.”

  “Where we headed, Captain?”

  “Ship Wreck Current.”

  There was a hush of silence. Nary had a sailor returned from Ship Wreck Current, but if my hunch was right, it my only way to Henri.

  Smee hurried to my side. “Your hat, Cap’n.”

  I grinned devilishly as I placed it on my head.

  “You sure you want to go through with this?” he asked. “I mean the lass be pretty, but she’s a fish in a pond.”

  “I hope you never understand, Smee.”

  “Why is that, Cap’n?”

  “Because love is a worse curse than anything out there.”

  “How so?”

  “Because you’d do anything.”

  The day went sailed smoothly. I alternated with Smee at the helm.

  It was a bit uncomfortable for my father never took his eyes off of me.

  My mother was reprimanding our cook for his lack of nourishment in the meals.

  I ordered one of my powder monkeys to sit in the Crow’s Nest with a telescope keeping watch as Peter flew above us in the clouds.

  Wendy tittered and complained until one of my men escorted her to a cabin below decks, and Grim was pacing.

  At the moment everyone was below decks escaping from the scorching sun.

  “I must say, I’m impressed, son.”

  My skin prickled under my father’s intense stare.

  “I never understood your pull to the sea. In fact, I did everything in my power to discourage it, but I see now that I was wrong. You have the loyalty and devotion of your crew that few kings ever have from their subjects. And such allegiance stems only from one who earned it. Not only that, but what you’re willing to do for this Henri—astounds me. You are truly a king in every right, and I am proud of you.”

  My heart constricted, and my father patted my back.

  “Well done, son.”

  Shortly after that I traded places with Smee and headed below decks. I hadn’t been able to sleep the night before, and I needed rest. Opening the door to my cabin I was surprised to find Wendy pilfering through my affects.

  She didn’t even bash an eye at being caught. “Oh, finally! I almost thought you weren’t coming.”

  “What are you doing here?” I asked.

  “Waiting for you, silly!” she giggled.

  “Why?”

  “Why not?”

  “I’m not in the mood for games.”

  She placed her arm on my bicep. “I’m not playing, Hook. Don’t you remember when we were younger?”

  I jerked my hand out of her grasp. “How about you leave my room and go to your husband.”

  “But I want to be with you,” she purred.

  “It’s a little late for that.”

  “Is it? We could be together, James.”

  “You’re married.”

  “That doesn’t matter,” She insisted. “We could run away together.”

  “Really?” I asked. “Aren’t you the least bit affected by this?” I held up my hook.

  She flinched. “I was wrong all of those years ago. And besides I’m sure a fairy godmother could get rid of your little handicap.”

  “I like my hook.” I growled.

  “We’re meant to be together! We could be king and queen of Neverland!”

  “Peter is my father’s heir not I.”

  “We both know that your father never wanted that. I would not be surprised after all of this if you were offered the crown.”

  “I would refuse. My place is on the seas whether that is on this boat, with Henri, or in Davy Jones’ locker.”

  “Don’t you understand that you don’t have to do any of that anymore?” she asked nearly hysterical.

  “Don’t you understand that this is the life I have chosen? That this is the life I want!” I exclaimed. “I don’t want the crown! I don’t want Neverland! And I don’t want you! Get out of my room, Wendy!”

  She pouted. “So, you’re rejecting me!”

  “You rejected me first!”

  “And it was a terrible mistake. I’m sorry!”

  “It’s too late.”

  “Don’t make me go back to him!”

  “You made your bed, Wendy; and you chose the wrong brother.”

  She raised her hand to slap me, but I grabbed her wrist, “Leave!”

  Chapter 24: Part of Your World

  “I crave a love so deep the ocean would be jealous.”

  —Pablo Neruda

  GRIM

  This is the worst part of the book, where there is either ruin or restoration. The hero could lose everything even his own life. It’s here where Romeo poisons himself, and Juliet plunges a dagger into her heart. This is where the prince is at Cinderella’s home, but she’s locked up. This is the end of the line. Either the hero’s plan works or fails.

  We were all standing on the deck of Hook’s ship. Peter, Wendy, King and Queen Thrushbeard, Hook’s crew, me, and the man of the hour, Hook.

  “Tell me the plan again,” I said.

  “It’s simple: I strap these cannonballs to my bootstraps, jump overboard, and pray to God that a mermaid pities me and takes me to Atlantis.”

  I gulped. This plan was too risky for my liking.

  We all watched grimly as Hook strapped the cannonballs to his bootstraps.

  Turning to his crew he said, “The sea is where we belong with or without me, I expect ye to be pirates.” To his family, “Tell the legend of Captain Hook. Do not let me be forgotten.” And to me, Hook held out his arms. “Thank you for everything you’ve done.”

  “Go save the girl.”

  He grinned and stood on the railing.

  “When you’re down there remember a pirate’s life for me.”

  He smirked. “Drink up, me hearties, yo ho!”

  He jumped overboard and disappeared in the depths.

  “Good luck, Captain Hook.” I whispered.
r />   Henri

  Sebastian was telling me a captivating story about a Selkie king who fell in love with a human slave.

  I was captured in the story when I heard a mermaid shout, “Look! It’s a man!”

  My eyes darted to a dark figure that was on the outskirts of Atlantis. Squinting I realized that he was being pulled to the depths by cannonballs strapped to his legs.

  “He’s drowning,” A mergirl shouted.

  I wasn’t paying attention because something glinted on the man’s hand. An unmistakable hook! With a swish of my tail, I shot off in his direction. I quickly placed a bubble of air over his face.

  He gasped.

  He was too heavy, but there was no option of leaving him out there.

  I remembered one of the many lessons I had learned. I focused calling the waves to push us to the safety of Atlantis.

  Hook had recovered from his lack of oxygen. “That was brilliant,” He drawled.

  “What kind of an idiot are you?” I shouted.

  “Your retard in shining armor.”

  “What were you thinking!”

  He opened his mouth to reply; but my grandfather interrupted him, “Captain James Hook, what are you doing here!” His voice thundered.

  Hook didn’t take his eyes off of me. “I’m here for my girl.”

  Grandfather laughed. “What did you expect? To come to my kingdom like a drowned cat and make demands? What you came for can never be yours.”

  “I disagree.”

  “She’s a queen.”

  “I am the son of King Thrushbeard and his queen.”

  “You’re a pirate.”

  “The king of the seas!”

  “The garbage of the seas, and you do not love my granddaughter.”

  “You’d like to think that wouldn’t you?” Hook cupped my face in his callous hands. “I’m in love with you. I should have realized it sooner, but you’re my ocean. I’m lost in your depths.”

  My heart swarmed with bats. I never thought I would hear him say that and mean it. But I could tell that he did mean it. But it couldn’t be—I was cursed!

  My grandfather’s face was red with anger. “You are not of the seas,” He said proudly as if he had finally won.

  But Hook only smiled. “You said yourself that I am.”

  “I said no such thing.”

  “I’m a pirate, the riff raff of the seas.”

  I couldn’t believe it.

  Hook had found a loophole. That wonderful, devious pirate!

  “Now what?” I asked having no idea what this meant.

  “Now I can be a part of your world, Princess Henrietta Stilskin. Will you marry me, Henri?”

  I didn’t have to think. After all this was a fairytale albiet an unusual one. “Yes!”

  With that Hook picked me up and swung me around before he finally kissed me with true-love’s kiss.

  Chapter 25: Wedding of the Century

  “As endless as the ocean as timeless as the tides.”

  —Author unknown.

  HOOK

  The day was perfect with a soft breeze, a light blue sky, and an even lovelier princess lying across my chest. Her brown hair shone like golden doubloons; I was in love with her hair.

  “Is this what it feels like?” she asked.

  “What feels like?” I flexed my hand across her side.

  “Love?”

  “I would imagine this is part of it, but I’m sure one can be much, more in love.”

  “How?”

  Leaning over I pressed my mouth close to her ear.

  She giggled when my stubble came in contact with her soft skin.

  I was in love with her ear. I whispered and tightened my arms around her.

  She relaxed in my arms before jerking away her warm eyes glowing with indignation. “You’re a scoundrel.”

  “I prefer dashing rapscallion.” I waggled my eyebrows. “Just imagine it, my love. You and I after the vows alone for the night.”

  “You didn’t say that!” She pointed out.

  “You’re absolutely correct, but what I said was highly too inappropriate to be repeated.”

  “You confess!”

  “Never!”

  She laughed.

  I was in love with her laugh.

  “I don’t think I’ll marry you after what you just said.” Henri wiggled out of my arms.

  “Take that back!” I demanded.

  “Never!”

  I scowled. “Did anyone ever tell you how stubborn you are?”

  “Yes, actually you tell me that almost every single day!”

  “And you haven’t learned any better?”

  “Absolutely not!”

  I was about to pounce on my prey when Grim poofed between us.

  “What did I say about no interruptions?” I asked.

  She just rolled her eyes at me, “You two need to get ready.”

  I ignored her and entrapped Henri in my arms again.

  “Now!”

  I was in love with how she fit into my arms.

  “You have two weddings! We don’t have time for this!” Grim yelled exasperated by now.

  “Come on we have a deadline thanks to the idiot captain here.”

  Henri hugged me. “She has a point, Hook.”

  I shook my head and held her closer. “No, she doesn’t.”

  “We need to get ready.”

  “Let’s elope.”

  Henri stuck her tongue out at me. “There’s no way I’m missing my wedding!”

  And Grim who was waving a pen around like a crazy person said, “I’ll turn you into a frog!”

  “Fine, fine I surrender!” I raised my hands.

  Placing one more kiss on Henri’s lips—I was in love with her lips—I whispered, “See you at the altar.”

  “I love you, Hook.”

  “I love you, Henri.”

  Grim and Henri disappeared in a poof.

  I laughed because Grim already had me in a suit. “Sneaky authors think of everything.”

  The Dark Forest Republic went over the top for the wedding decorations.

  Dwarf, our wedding designer, had completely outdone himself.

  The Humpback eagerly allowed us to pick the Notre Dame for the church.

  Every villain you can think of was in attendance even some heroes such as my family. The bouquets were made of wilted roses and the cake was over ten feet tall.

  Tiger Lilly and Grim were the only bridesmaids and their dresses switched from red to blue with love from the Stepmothers.

  Napoleon was our ring bearer, and he held his position with the utmost reverence.

  And Mayfly kept hissing at me.

  I scowled at the little beastie, but I knew Henri loved the blasted thing.

  Henri’s dress was just as unique as she was. A simple shale blue bodice that flared out cascading like water. Ripped tulle gave the appearance of crashing waves and sea foam. She couldn’t resist brand-new shoes straight from Cinderella’s shoe boutique; I believed they were Wedding of the Century brand.

  Rumple of course gave her away, and he smiled proudly as he placed her hand into mine.

  Henri’s crabby friend Sebastian was our minister, “Dearly beloved, we gather here today to witness the union of Captain James Hook Thrushbeard to Queen Henrietta Anastasia Stilskin. Hook, do you take this woman to love and to hold in sickness and health, in de storms and de calms of the sea, and in de normal and magical?”

  “I do.”

  “Henri, do you take this man to love and to hold in sickness and health, in de storms and calms of de sea, and in de normal and magical?”

  “I do.”

  “With de power vested in me, I now pronounce ye man and wife!”

  Grinning, I pushed the veil out of the way and gave Henri an inappropriate kiss.

  She squealed as I picked her up.

  “And you said you would never marry me!”

  “You’re doing it again!”

  “What?”r />
  “Ruining the moment!”

  “Always.”

  “You can’t ride into the sunset yet, love birds!” Grim interrupted me from kissing my lovely bride again. “You have another ceremony to attend.”

  I sighed. “You’re really getting on my nerves, Grim.”

  “We have to go, Hook!” Henri said.

  “Curse the fool who wanted both worlds.” I grumbled.

  “Wasn’t that you?” Henri asked.

  “Don’t remind me.”

  “Wait a toast to my brother and his bride!” Peter exclaimed flying over our heads and sprinkling us with champagne as the twerp began to quote the Princess Bride. “Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togethwah today! Mawwiage that bwessed awangement that dweam wiffin a dweam—and wuv twoo wuv!” He started laughing so hard that he could barely stay afloat.

  Scowling I told him to grow up, but that was the thing about Peter Pan he never did. Scooping my bride into my arms I ran out of the church and to the cliff overlooking the ocean. “You ready?” I asked Henri.

  “I suppose I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”

  “Good.” I kissed her before I jumped off of the cliff, and we dove into the ocean.

  The water surged around us, and I grinned as my body transformed. My legs were now a black and gold scaled tail. I’d never get used to turning into a merman, but watching my beautiful bride turn into a mermaid I knew it was all worth it.

  Henri would never have abandoned the Merfolk as her mother not even for me, but she missed the Dark Forest Republic terribly.

  It was old barnacle brain himself that came up with the scheme. He turned me into a merman so that I could be with Henri in every way, and he allowed both of us to come and go as we pleased.

  She was crowned Queen of the Seven Seas, and after the wedding I would be the King of the Seven Seas.

  The villains begged us to be their king and queen too, so Henri and I found ourselves with quite the empire. It was more than I had ever dared hope for. Not only did I get the girl, but I got to keep the Jolly Roger, and I got to be King.

  Henri couldn’t help but stare when I changed. I knew I looked almost as impressive as she was beautiful.

  The merfolk were all gathered and ready. Because they couldn’t attend our dry wedding, we agreed to have a wet one too.