Last Bastion

by Rachel Aaron

  "I can't believe I'm hearing this," Tina said, looking around the circle. "Did you guys not hear SB's history lesson? It's called the Forlorn Hope, not the Actually-Going-to-Happen Hope. The only reason the king's dangling pardons and citizenship in front of our faces is because he doesn't think we'll survive to collect. He doesn't want player citizens. His whole country hates us, remember? And even if we do survive, we're still right back where we started. The king will have conscripted himself an army of the biggest badasses in the world. You think he's going to just let us talk to his portal keepers and find a way home after that? Of course not. That's stupid. He's never going to let us go, which means we'll be right back to fighting him."

  She grabbed the scroll out of SB's hands and shook it at them. "There is literally nothing in this deal that's good for us long term. I appreciate that you're all tired of killing. I'm tired, too, but we have to keep our eyes on the prize. We can't sell out everyone's futures for a cease-fire today."

  "If it's everyone's futures, then we can't decide anything without Cinco and Assets," Anders pointed out. "This affects them, as well."

  Tina's eyes widened. Anders was absolutely right, but if they brought this treaty to the rest of the players, everything would dissolve into chaos.

  "We should vote on it first," she said quickly, stalling for time. "I'm not going in there unless the Roughnecks are a unified front."

  As always, Zen's eyes widened in surprise when Tina suggested a vote, but Tina had this council thing down now. The only way the officers could override her decision as guildmaster was with a unanimous vote, and that was never going to happen because SilentBlayde was the Assassin leader, and he always had her back. He would vote with her no matter what, which meant Plan Wind-Fire was as good as go. She'd still have to convince the other guild leaders to go along, but she had no doubt Cinco would be all for burning this shithole to the ground. Assets wouldn't, but he'd be outvoted, so his opinion didn't matter.

  Thinking it through that way, Tina didn't even know why she'd wasted time arguing. She should have just called the vote at the beginning and avoided all this drama. But late was better than never, so she turned to face her officers, careful to keep her face concerned to maintain the illusion that this wasn't just going through the motions.

  "Okay," she said. "If you want to take the king's Forlorn Hope deal, raise your hand. If not, leave your hand down, and we'll go with the Wind-Fire powder instead."

  Killbox's hand shot up, as did Frank's. Zen's went up next, followed by Richard's and Anders's. After a moment's hesitation and a nervous look at Tina, NekoBaby put her hand up as well. Tina was about to call the vote there when SilentBlayde slowly lifted his hand into the air.

  Tina felt like someone had kicked the world out from under her. The other officers started chattering in happy relief the moment they realized the vote had passed, but Tina couldn't parse what they said. She was entirely focused on SilentBlayde as he slowly put his hand back down, his blue eyes locked on the ground at his feet.

  Tina's hands curled into fists. "Why?" she whispered.

  SB flinched from the quiet question as if it were a blow. "Because just looking out for ourselves isn't good enough anymore," he said, voice shaking. "We're part of this world too. I know you're only trying to save people, but we can't just kill everyone to get our way."

  "This is not our fault!" she cried. "We were just defending ourselves! The NPCs started this! They should be the ones who burn for it, not us!"

  "They aren't NPCs, Tina!" SB yelled back, lifting his eyes at last. "They're people, and they aren't all bad!"

  "They hate us!" she reminded him. "I know! I had Malakai screaming his hate in my face! You think that's going to change just because we agree to be the king's stooges? You think every single one of those knights won't stab us in the back the moment we're weak?"

  Tina didn't realize she was screaming until she heard the silence after she stopped. All the other officers were watching her and SB with wide eyes, backing away slowly as if they were afraid it was going to come to blows. Neko had even started a healing spell, which hurt way more than Tina had been prepared for, but nothing stabbed deeper than the hurt in SB's eyes as he stared back at her.

  "If they hate us, it's because we taught them to," he pleaded. "Only one in ten of these people were in the Nightmare. The other nine learned to hate us the normal way: because we killed them. Or savaged them. Or stole from them. They hate us because we call them NPCs and treat them like they're not human, and they're not wrong!" He threw out his hand at the city behind her. "Our backup plan was to burn the biggest city in this world to the ground to save ourselves! Are you really surprised they see us as villains?"

  "Don't you dare try to make us the bad guys here," Tina snarled. "We're the victims! We're defending an island of refugees from an army, for fuck's sake!"

  "Refugee isn't the same thing as innocent," SB said, shaking his head. "You're not blind, Tina. You saw the dead townspeople in the streets on our way here. The knights didn't do that. You have to know we're protecting some players who've done utterly terrible things."

  "Name one," Tina challenged.

  "Me," SB said, pulling his ninja mask down to show his full face.

  Tina took a step back.

  "Maybe your hands are clean," he said desperately. "But mine aren't. I killed good people because I thought like you do. I told myself they were all just evil NPCs, and that meant killing them was okay, but they're not, and it wasn't. They're people. Yes, there are psychos like Malakai, and yes, we should fight them, but most of the people on both sides of this war are good. We should be working to save them, not locking ourselves in a hole while everything else burns." He clenched his gloved hands tight. "I'm sorry, Tina, but I can't do this. I've killed too many already, made too many mistakes that can never be taken back. I need to atone for those crimes, not commit more. How am I supposed to live in this world when you're chomping at the bit to destroy it?"

  Every word he said felt like a knife in her gut. What the hell had happened to SB while he'd been out in the city? Whatever it was, she desperately needed to fix it, stomp it down, and make sure it never bothered him again. She couldn't stand to see him this upset, but it was what he said at the end that cut deepest of all.

  "You want to live here?"

  SB froze, eyes wide. "I-I..."

  Tina's fists clenched tighter. This wasn't exactly a surprise. He'd already said he wanted to stay once before back at the Order Fortress. She'd already been over all of this in her mind while she'd been tying herself into knots over him. But hearing SilentBlayde say it again now, in front of everyone... that made it real, and Tina didn't know how to take that.

  "What about me?" she said in a small voice. "I can't stay here." She held up her massive hands. "I'm a giant rock monster! I don't eat, I don't sleep, I don't feel, and every day, it gets worse! I can't live like this. I just want to go home and be human again. Not be stuck in this world with no indoor plumbing, where everyone hates our guts!"

  "We'll find you a way home," he promised. "Taking the king's treaty doesn't mean we stop looking for a way back. Deciding not to destroy the city actually helps that because we'll still have the--"

  "But you want to stay," she said again, the words coming out like knives. "Even if I don't."

  SilentBlayde's eyes fell back to his feet. "I-I..." He stopped, body shaking. "I can't go back," he said at last. "Even if you burn this place to the ground, I can't go back."

  Tina took a hitching breath. Honestly, that wasn't a surprise, either, but hearing it still made her feel like she was falling apart.

  "Can you..." She stopped to swallow. "Can you at least tell me why?"

  He shook his head, and Tina's free-falling despair did a U-turn right back into rage. "This is the same reason why me visiting you on JET was a no-go, isn't it?"

  He nodded.

  "And you're still not going to tell me," she said, fists clenching tighter and tighter. "Even her
e, in a different world you've already said you're never coming back from, you still don't trust me enough to tell me the truth."

  "I can't. I'm sorry," SB said in a small voice. "Even here, the reasons why haven't changed. I just... I can't tell you."

  Tina began to curse. She cursed loudly, and she cursed for a long time in every language she knew. It was a terrible, immature way to react, but she couldn't seem to stop. She just felt like such a fucking idiot. Nothing had changed. Three damn years of pretending she wasn't hurt, that they were still just friends and everything was fine, and nothing had changed. The whole damn world was new, and she was still an idiot girl mooning over a boy who didn't want to be with her, who'd rather live in the ashes of a world rather than go home with her. He'd even tried to warn her. Two days ago, he'd told her to her face that she could have everything of SB but nothing of Haruto, and she'd still deluded herself into thinking there was something between them. She was such a fucking idiot.

  "Well," she said in the terrible silence after her profane tirade finally ended. "Guess I can't argue with that. You've made it obvious that you don't want me to know the real you. And you're not going back no matter what I say or do. And you're not going to tell me anything that might let me fix the problem or even understand why you're stabbing me in the fucking heart. I get it, but just so we're perfectly clear, I gotta ask, what am I to you?"

  SB was ghostly pale by the time she finished. He stared at her with eyes full of desperation. For what, Tina had no idea. Probably to get out of this conversation, but she wasn't letting him off the hook this time. There was no game client to crash here. If he was going to hurt her like this again and refuse to even tell her why, then goddamn it, Tina was going to have one answer at least.

  "I need to know," she said, her voice cold and hard as the deep bedrock. "Because all this time, I was thinking one thing, but it's clear now that that was wrong. So help me understand, Blayde, because I clearly can't get it by myself. What am I?"

  She let the question hang, and SilentBlayde swallowed. "You're the most important person in the world to me."

  Tina clenched her teeth until they creaked. "Bull. Shit. If I were important, you'd act like it. You'd let me in, let me help you, but you never do. You give and you give and you give, but you never want anything of mine in return. Do you know how much that hurts? How worthless it makes me feel?"

  Her voice cracked then, and Tina turned away. "Well," she said bitterly, staring at the torn-up ground. "At least you can stop lying now, because I've finally figured it out. I'm your fucking charity case. I'm the poor, desperate girl you log on as SilentBlayde to go play rescuer for and feel better about yourself."

  "That's not it!" he cried, reaching for her. "I--"

  Tina slapped his hand away, hard.

  "It was a great setup," she went on. "You got me whenever you wanted, and when you didn't, you could just log off, and I went away. No wonder you kept me out of your real life. Can't have me getting out of my lane, right?"

  "That's not how it was!" SB said desperately.

  "Well whatever it was, you won't tell me. So I'm done," Tina snarled. "I'll find a way to repay the money I owe you. I guess that means gold since you'll be staying here, but that actually makes things easier. Unlike Tina, Roxxy's rich, and I don't think I'll ever be playing FFO again."

  "Tina, no," SB choked out. "Just let me--"

  "Nope," she said, turning her back on him. She had to, or else she'd cry. "I can't think of a single thing that's left to say, except screw you."

  She glanced at the other Roughneck officers, who'd been watching this whole thing play out in horrified silence. "Drama's over," she announced. "And the vote's been cast. Looks like we're done here."

  "What about the other guild leaders?" Anders asked nervously.

  Tina shrugged. "What about them? Cinco will want to burn it all, and Assets will want to take the king's out. That makes me the deciding vote, but you've already decided for me, so deal's done." She shoved the treaty's scroll into Zen's chest. "Take this back to the king and tell him we accept, but anyone below level fifty has to be exempt from combat. By fucking God, I'll stand on that bridge and tank you all myself before I let anyone throw the lowbies off this cliff."

  "No call for that," Zen said, taken aback. "I absolutely agree that lowbies should be excluded, but what are you going to do?"

  Tina pointed at the rest of the Roughnecks, who were still waiting with weapons drawn in front of the fire-warded stone building where every other player in Camp Comeback was hiding and counting on them. "I'm going to go tell everyone else what we've done. And for the record, I hope you're all right and I'm wrong, 'cause we're gonna regret the hell out of this if you aren't. But the die's been cast. This is how the Roughnecks work, so I've got no choice. If we're screwed, we're just gonna have to make it work."

  With that, she stormed off. SB tried to stop her, but she put her hand out inches from his face.

  "Don't talk to me."

  He jumped back like she'd taken a swing at him. Trying not to feel like she'd been punched herself, Tina kept going, shaking the ground with her steps as she marched up the hill toward the stone shelters.

  Chapter 21

  James

  James did not like what he was seeing.

  He'd come back to the king full of hope for the future, but his soaring good mood had started crashing as he'd watched Tina and her officers. Standing on the bridge, he was too far away to hear what they were saying, but from the way Tina was stomping the ground, it did not look good.

  "She is truly terrifying," King Gregory said quietly, staring across the ruined riverbank at Roxxy before dropping his eyes to the gore-covered bridge and the corpse-choked river underneath. "They all are. I heard the players bragging of their prowess when I was trapped during the Nightmare, but I thought it was only that: bragging. I never imagined the truth would be greater than the stories."

  "This is extreme," James assured him quickly. "You're seeing what happens when raid-geared players run up against normal people. The power difference the Nightmare created is monstrous. You've seen the evidence of that in your own body, but that's exactly why we needed peace. Even if the Once King weren't coming, the players have to be peacefully integrated into society and given a stake in this world. Anything less will just lead to more tragedy."

  "Then let us hope they take your treaty," the king replied, looking nervously back at Roxxy, who was screaming what sounded like a stream of random profanity. "I must admit, it does not look promising."

  "My sister will do the right thing," James said firmly. "Tina's a good person who takes care of her people, and her fellow Roughnecks are the same. We've offered them a fair deal that's in everyone's best interest. They'll take it."

  The king looked reassured by that, but Ar'Bati's tail was lashing harder than ever. "Are you sure? For someone made of stone, your sister is surprisingly unstable."

  "She wasn't born a stonekin," James reminded him. "She's human. We all are, or were. Anyway, she'll come around. I know it."

  Flameboyant and Ar'Bati shared a skeptical look, but they didn't say anything else. James was glad of it. It wasn't easy to defend his sister as someone who valued peace when he was standing in the evidence of her fury. The bridge beneath them reeked of death, and the river smelled even worse. He was also concerned that none of the players had come out of the island's stone buildings, which he now suspected were fire shelters after hearing Tina talk about wind-fire powder. He'd done his best both to convince his sister and give the players a fair deal, but it really did look as if Tina's raiders were still planning to launch their attack. His suspicions turned to dread when Tina suddenly stomped off, shoving her hand in SB's face as she walked up the hill toward the sealed stone Trainers' Hall.

  "Oh dear," the king said.

  "It's not over yet," James said quickly. "Look!" He pointed at the rest of the group, who were coming in their direction. "Those are the Roughnecks' officers." And the Ra
nger in front--Zen, he believed her name was--had his scroll. "They must be coming to talk!"

  "Only to talk, I hope," Fangs growled, hand going back to his sword. "That's a lot of magical equipment coming our way."

  The players approaching them were armed to the teeth with the best weapons in the game. It was pretty terrifying to see in the current context, but James just shook his head and motioned for everyone to let go of their weapons.

  "We can't talk peace if we look like we're going to fight!" he hissed at them.

  The veteran knights gave him the stink eye, but Gregory nodded.

  "Weapons down," he ordered, straightening up on his massive horse. "If this comes to violence, we shall not be the ones to start it."

  Gritting their teeth, the four veteran knights released their sword hilts as the player group stepped onto the bridge.

  Now that they were close, James was starting to panic. He still didn't know what his sister had decided, but SilentBlayde looked as if someone had just killed his family in front of him. That could not be good. James desperately wanted to run forward and ask what had happened before the group reached the king, but he was the one who'd written a treaty and made this into a formal situation, so he stayed put at the king's side, waiting nervously as the knot of players came to a stop at the zenith of the bridge five feet away.

  For several heartbeats, no one said a word, then James realized that, as the connection between the players and the king, he was the one who needed to start things off.

  "Um, Your Majesty," he said, gesturing at Zen, who was standing in front. "This is Zen, the Roughnecks' Ranger officer. She--"

  "Actually," Zen said, pushing her emerald-green hair away from her face, "my real name is Kayla Johnson. Roxxy sent us to tell you that, on behalf of Camp Comeback, we accept your offer of peace but only if players below level fifty are exempt from combat."

  James closed his eyes with a shudder of relief. The king sighed as well, though James was probably the only one close enough to notice.