decontamination

by Desconhecido(a)

  "How could I know for sure, Maggie?" He sat up in bed, allowing his long legs to dangle over the side, "Sure, we spend a lot of time together on patrol. Once in a while we'll go out for some fun. But you always hold me away."

  I swallowed hard. I couldn't begin to deny that. I kept him back, just a little. I was afraid of getting too close. There were too many dangers in being too close to your partner. I'd seen what happened when partners were best friends. One gets killed, the other never recovers. I was running scared of that.

  "Pryce, I leave everyone on the outside of my world, especially you. We're partners and companions. We can't have more than that, now can we? We're in a field where people can't be best friends. It's dangerous," I said with a shaking voice as I turned away from him.

  I heard him moving behind me. Hands grabbed my shoulders. Roughly, Pryce turned me to meet his eyes. I don't think I'd ever seen him so emotional. Worse yet, I couldn't read him. I've never had the problem before.

  "I accept that, Mags," he said, voice rough. "I accept that we're together each day. That there is no one more important in my entire existence than you. I leave my life in your hands day after day. And yet, I stand on the edge of your world, peering in, waiting for acceptance. Just like in every other aspect of my life. Always on the outside and never welcome within."

  "Pryce… " I whispered confused.

  "You're the world to me, Margaret. My world. Don't you understand that there's nothing else for me, but you?"

  He was getting a little heavy on me. I wanted to pull back but his hands held me firm against his body. I think I felt something slithering against my leg, but I couldn't be sure. I was too focused on the intensity of Pryce's brown pools that graced his face.

  "Everyday, I risk my world on the battlefield, Maggie. Every slash against you, every shot, every danger weighs heavily on me. I keep you safe in hopes that someday you'll let me into the doors to everything you are, because all that I am already belongs to you."

  One of his hands left my shoulder. Thin fingers traced the curve of my cheek, like I was something truly delicate. And the look in his eyes… Why was he staring at me like his soul was about to pour into mine?

  Realization hit me. I seriously hoped I was wrong about it. I started pulling away from him.

  "Ooh, no. Don't you dare do this to me, Pryce."

  He ignored me and continued talking, "I love you, Margaret. I have for a long time. I can't bear the thought of you considering me one of them."

  I backed away from him, tripping onto my bed in the process. He did it. He said the very bad things. What was I going to do? He took it at least two levels above where I thought he'd take it. I mean, I thought he only wanted to be closer friends. What he was saying was crazy!

  "I don't think of you as them-I don’t! I just said that not long ago. Try getting that through your thick head! We…we’re…" I couldn't get my words straight because I just couldn't breathe. "You can't feel that way about me, Pryce. We're partners. Fighters. Soldiers don't fall for soldiers. It's too much risk."

  "You're all I know, Maggie. Our lives are spent together as one. How could I not feel more?"

  I shook my head in denial. Just because we were always together didn't mean that we should feel anything. It was just the nature of what we did. We were forced together. That wasn't as real as the desire that we would want to be together.

  Pryce must have read my mind. "I can't imagine a day without you. The two days I spend in here are torture. I want to be by your side as a choice, not as a duty."

  Truth was, I couldn't imagine a day without him either. He was a part of the every day. If he wasn't there, I don't know what I'd do with myself. Shit! I don't know how, but I'd gotten to that point and hadn't even realized. God, that was dangerous!

  Pryce moved, kneeling in front of me. He pushed my unruly hair out of my face

  "You feel the same. I see it in your eyes," he insisted, touching my face again. My eyes were stinging with waiting tears. I didn't want to care more than I did. What he wanted was truly the impossible. I couldn't give him all that he wanted to give me. Call me practical or realistic, but it was the truth.

  "I don't love you, Pryce." I expected to see hurt on his face. Instead, he offered me a tight smile.

  "Then I'll love enough for both of us." His fingers moved from my cheek to the back of my hair. After a few gentle strokes, he pulled me toward him. My eyes fluttered closed as my body tensed in fearful anticipation. I had no idea of what to expect from Pryce right now. I had an idea, but…

  My heart stopped as his cold, thin lips brushed mine. I couldn't stop the soft whimpering sound that rose in my throat. I wasn't sure if it was a frightened or a happy sound, even to my own ears. Breath caught, he pressed his lips on mine firmly, sucking on the bottom lip, then the top. Something warm rushed through me. Wow. It had been a long time since I'd had a kiss. This was worth the wait. It was gentle, coaxing, smooth like silk across my lips. Despite his cold skin, his mouth was a welcoming warmth that I didn't realize I craved.

  What I didn't expect was the rush of emotions that came with that simple union. I pushed him off of me as I felt overwhelmed. I wasn't sure what was going on except I needed to get the hell away from him.

  "Don't, Pryce. Don't," I begged breathlessly. My body was trembling. I was more afraid of him than an Oak attack. That really didn't bode well for either of us.

  I looked at him with undisguised fear. He must have seen something else, though, because all he did was gently touch my cheek again with a smile. I leaned back to escape the fingers. Pryce moved into me, pushing me further into the bed and against the wall.

  Then he struck, like a snake. Again lips fell on mine, this time hungrier than the last. His mouth chipped away at my resolve until I could no longer keep my lips tense. He forced me open, slipping his tongue inside the wet heat of my mouth. I felt dizzy as he explored me, licking my inner cheek and the walls of my mouth. I couldn't resist the pull of him. I moved with him, tasting as I was tasted.

  God, help me, I was kissing Pryce back… and I liked it.

  When you haven't had any sort of physical contact in as long as it's been since I've had any, you can't help responding. I wanted to be touched. That wasn't the problem. I just wanted to keep it at touch… Pryce wouldn't keep it at physicality, and I knew it. His hands moved down my bare arms, rising bumps along my skin in the wake of his touch. It was such a smooth and gentle movement. I wasn't that soft, but his hands made me feel as if I were.

  His mouth moved from mine, finding the length of my neck. He sucked my skin, biting it with teeth sharper than a human's, but not sharp enough to damage me. I sucked in a long breath. The sensations excited me. It sent something nearly electric down my spine, forcing it to arch.

  But I was nervous. Secret eyes could be on us. And what would it mean? Sex meant nothing at all to some, but this couldn't not mean something to Pryce. I knew it like I knew my own face. I could feel it in the long licks he gave my skin and the feel of fingers moving beneath my tank top.

  Panicking, I felt the need to say something. Anything.

  "They'll see," my voice croaked at him.

  The excuse to stop sounded lame even to my ears. I closed my eyes for a moment as I sighed inwardly. He removed his mouth from my neck and gave me an amused look by the time my eyes opened again. I felt his hand slide under my shirt and move to the back. The palm spread along my spine, caressing lightly.

  "Let them," he whispered. I heard the ache in his voice. My pulse sped. Swallowing, I tried to push the sensation back inside before it leaped from my throat.

  "No, it's bad enough that-"

  His lips touched mine again, this time a simple, comforting brush of skin. He stole my breath. All I could do was stare. His lips moved across my lips, passed my cheek, which burned as he glided over them, to my ear. His slightly warm breath tingled against my earlobe.

  "Let me in, Maggie. Let me into your world," he pleaded as his free hand stro
ked my inner thigh. "Let it just be our worlds, tonight. Outside doesn't matter."

  Fingers moved upward until he reached the leg hole of my panties. He pulled the stretchy material until he could move deeper within. I felt him brush the hairs that stayed hidden behind cloth as he moved along the material. The touch was annoyingly persuasive. I heard my breath shake in my throat as I tried to breathe. His face pressed into my cheek, blowing his slightly cool breath on my skin. It should have been cool, yet it burned with his desires and need as it moved along. He made me feel guilty for trying to deny him.

  His fingers played at the edge without really touching me, though my body was beginning to long for his touch on my sensitive spots. My hips began to squirm in an unbecoming fashion-at least that was how I felt. It would be just sex, and somehow with Pryce, it’d be wrong

  I guess he accepted my hesitance as a rejection. The spot where his eyes touched my cheek felt wet. His hand started moving away from my panties, but the one on my back stayed. I couldn't tell him to stop, but I really couldn't ask him to continue.

  There was a soft mechanical buzz that filled the room. My eyes widened while I put my hands on Pryce's shoulders to shove him off of me.

  "What do you two think you're doing?" Casper 's voice echoed through the room

  Pryce, despite my efforts to move him, clung to my body. I could feel the brush of his lips trembling on me. I hadn't realized I hurt him that badly, but I had.

  "You know it's forbidden, Hybrid."

  I couldn't believe the coldness of Casper 's tone. What was forbidden? What the fuck was he talking about?

  "Pryce, what's-"

  He squeezed my back.

  "If you even think about mating, even causally, it's a year's reprogramming and detention," our cyborg doctor answered for me.

  Pryce pulled back. I stared at his pretty, angular face and his eyes of liquid brown. Tears glossed those brown orbs. Suddenly, my chest had an ache that wouldn't go away. I tried to swallow it down or will it away, but it seemed impossible. Shit, what had he done? A fuck wasn't worth a year in detention no matter how much you think you loved the person.

  His eyes lowered as though ashamed to have me see him cry. There really wasn't anything to be ashamed of. I'd seen the man at his worst and at his best. But there was something else other than his emotion. The air felt electric and hot. My stomach sank then felt pulled in three different directions and the hairs of my arms stood on end.

  Pryce looked to me again-his eyes no longer brown. They had dilated into black bottomless pits. The charge in the air grew. I wanted to move away because fear had started creeping up my spine, but Pryce held me steady with just the one hand. His eyes flashed from dilated to thin slits of black with surrounding brown like a cat. Emotion bled back to his features. It made me more worried than when he'd lost them.

  He turned to the nearest camera, raising a hand.

  "I'm a man, Casper," Pryce whispered, "and I'll live as one." The energy disappeared for a moment as though focusing on a single spot, then released in a series of pulses. One by one, the cameras of the room exploded in orange flame. I gasped. It was impossible, but Pryce had done it. Shit!

  “My dreams told me I could do this, but I didn’t believe them.” He slowly turned back to me as though waiting for a reaction.

  Safe to say I was speechless and more than a little frightened. But, I couldn't think of Pryce as anything other than Pryce. He wouldn't hurt me. He wouldn't.

  "I won't live as a tool, Maggie. I won't let them make me into a monster." Two tears flowed down either of his cheeks

  Hands shaking, I reached for either side of his face. My palms rested on the sides while thumbs wiped away tears. I would have never thought to treat Pryce the way others did. Hell, I didn't even realize it until that point. Only members of our immediate squad seemed to look at him properly. And in all that time, I had just ignored it. God, I hoped he realized it wasn't anything about him that kept me distant. That was all about me.

  "They're going to take you away?" I asked in a hollowed voice.

  I heard the sounds of the automatic doors beginning to unlatch. We barely had a few second. The staff had to go through a series of codes to get though the locked down room. A year. A year apart. No, worse than that. Like Hell would they let us get back together. Like Hell. I wouldn't be able to trust anyone as much as I trusted Pryce.

  "No," he said simply, "or at least, not today."

  The troops that guard the medical center rushed into the room in full armor. It made me feel sick to my stomach, especially when I noticed their guns pointed directly at his chest. I wanted to scream at them. Pryce deserved better treatment than this. He had been faithful to the military. He'd been a decent member of society. He didn't deserve this.

  There was nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. How could he think they wouldn't take him away?

  "Step away from Lt. Riley, Pryce. Nice and easy."

  Pryce never looked at them. His eyes stayed on me as though I was the only thing left to worry about. And, maybe I was. Everything else around us-impossibly-froze in time, as if a force beyond imagining had a grip on my reality. Eyes wide with shock, I looked around: a guard had opened fire, the muzzle blast halting like an eerie still life picture, even the noise was gone-or had not yet formed.

  I turned my gaze back to Pryce, trying to form one of the million questions that burst into my mind. No way could he fucking freeze time-no human or O’okara could do that. There was no way.

  "I guess I can't complain about you," Pryce started. "I held back from you, too. I had to so I could be safe. So they wouldn't take me from you." He took one of my shaking hands and kissed it. "Don't be frightened of me… "

  The fear in his voice troubled me deeply. And, surprisingly, I wasn't really afraid of him; instead, I was afraid of the situation and of what would happen to him. In that moment, I wished that I could have detached myself emotionally. I wanted that safe distance we usually had-friendship without being friends. Partners. But I think he opened me up somehow. I couldn't reform the hole in the wall. Worse yet, it was opening more.

  "I'm not frightened of you," I answered.

  "Do you trust me?"

  "Of course."

  "Could you ever love me?"

  I hesitated. I didn't know. The world was nearly in ruins, locked in a time of war. Love was just a luxury that many would never know. I am a trained killing machine. Could someone like me even love?

  "Pryce- "

  A finger fell to my lips to silence me. When he was sure that I wouldn't speak, the finger traced my lips.

  "If things were different. I know it would be possible. If only you were safe, right, Mags?"

  His eyes became hollow holes again. Darkness began eating at the edges of the world. My heart sped damn close to a breaking point. What was he doing? I tried to speak, but I couldn't.

  "The world government wanted true warriors. By fooling around with nature, they accidentally gave hybrids powers beyond what they could control. They thought that if they kept us from gaining certain emotions, we would never know remorse in our actions. That we could become monsters worse than the ones who came from beyond the blue skies, and would protect them just because we were their creations." His hand cupped my cheek while he talked and the world became steadily darker.

  "They tried to kill us all, Maggie, except for the ones that seemed loyal like me. And I was loyal. I was. The others thought to be dead aren't. They fled. The ones that escaped have been calling me home to them for a long time now, but I ignored the calling because I fell in love with you." His face moved to mine. "We'll be safe there, Maggie. Safe always."

  I wanted to say no, but he'd obviously made up my mind for me. I would have kicked his butt if I could have moved. Darkness had almost taken the world, and heaviness kept my body from so much as twitching a muscle. And before me, only a little piece of Pryce was left. He looked so sincere. He wanted to keep both of us safe. I don't think I've ever known safe
ty. How sad is that?

  As the last touch of light left my eyes, and my mind began slipping into unconsciousness, I felt lips on mine.

  From far away, I heard a soft whispering: "I do this for you more than myself. I want you to breath the real air and feel sun, just as you’ve always dreamt."

  * * * *

  Darkness. Cold, lonely darkness. I floated in it, light as a feather. I held my knees to my chest and waited as I drifted for what seemed like forever.

  “Pryce,” I whispered.

  I felt a tug on my mind. A gentle push urged me in the right direction. I willed my body to float to the echo inside myself. The feeling told me to wait here for now.

  The darkness became solid beneath me, and I settled down for my wait.

  * * * *

  I came into the real world, gasping for breath. I knew I was on some type of rocky surface. Sharp edges dug into my back. I shifted to escape the pain when I felt another deeper pain in my side. I cried out and instinctively touched the area. When my hand pulled back, it was covered in blood.

  Pryce was above me now, looking down into my face with a sad look in his eyes. Even in the mostly darkness and the orange flicker of flames, I could see the scratches and bruises on him.

  “Not yet,” he whispered to me. “Wait for me inside a little longer. I promise we’ll find someplace safe soon.” His eyes captured mine. The pain faded away as I fell back into the darkness.

  * * * *

  I found myself back in the middle of what I guessed was my mind’s dark plane, which seemed to stretch endlessly around me. It wasn't cold like I had come to expect in the time I floated aimlessly-no, this was warm and welcoming. Oddly, I felt like the darkness was comforting me in all-encompassing arms, touching every part of my nude body. I could feel eyes on me as well, watching closely-a shiver ran down my spine. Slowly I turned to see who had joined me in the darkness.