Trapped with a Way Out

by Jeffery Martinez

  The young girl with white skin and silvery hair had reclined back in her seat at the desk. She chose not to tell him that he had sea water in his blood (a distant lineage from generations back, perhaps a selkie who fell in love with a man and had many children) for he would not believe her, and it would distract him from the things she needed to tell him now. "She is not from this land that you call home," the little shopkeeper said instead, "as I'm sure you're well aware. She came to this place from far away to find the call of a heart that sings a song like hers. However, she mistook from whence the melody came, and blames herself for the disharmony…"

  He was annoyed with the vague riddles, but on the other hand her words evoked a memory in Pip. He knew he'd seen William somewhere before; in the sea, in the waves, in the bushes. Then she turned up naked on the beach, with a newness to her and a perfect innocence of human customs despite her physical age. She mooned over the Count as though she had seen him before, and seemed to look to the sea with such a sadness and familiarity that…

  "What is she?!" he said suddenly.

  Unfazed, the little shopkeeper reclined in her large leather armchair, and smiled gently.

  "You must hurry, Mr. Bernadotte," the little girl with the old woman's voice said, "If you wish to make your affections known, your time is running short, and once the chance is gone, it will be gone forever."

  "What do you mean? How do I…? How you know my…" actually, considering all her other oddities and the time she had spent with William before he arrived, he should not have been surprised that she knew his name. "What do you mean, gone? What's going to happen?"

  "She gambled everything she had on an outcome that she had little control over, and will soon lose all."

  "But..."

  "Would that I could reveal more, but that is all I can say on the matter, Mr. Bernadotte," the shopkeeper said, "The rest is up to you."

  "Wha-? Now hold on! You can't just...!"

  William poked her head back in to see what was taking so long. Pip flinched as though struck.

  The little shopkeeper with the face of a child and the voice of a wise old woman stared quietly, and bowed her head. "Good evening, Mr. Bernadotte. William Hanna."

  The two were very quiet as they walked back to the mansion, each lost in thought.

  'She looked so lonely, didn't she?' William thought. She wondered if that was to be her fate, if she lived so long. She was beginning to think the Count would never return her affections, and then she would be as sad and lonely and weary at the end of her three hundred years as a mermaid. But she could not even imagine such an endless lifetime...

  Pip's thoughts were churning as violently as one of those new-fangled laundry machines; the ones so violent they ripped up the clothes they were supposed to wash. He tried to make sense of that insufferably vague and needlessly mysterious shopkeeper's cryptic words, but could not...

  Neither he nor William looked at each other as they walked. Her eyes were downcast, and she seemed to struggle not to cry. His eye was looking up, up toward the sunset and over the horizon. After a bit of walking he chanced to look down at William. She looked so forlorn as she walked. He inhaled deeply, and looked ahead. It wasn't his business, it wasn't his job, and he would certainly get in trouble with the Count if he acted on it, but there had to be some way to cheer her up...

  As they walked they eventually passed Kensington Gardens; a beautiful green park with a lovely lake, filled with swans on the water, with lily pads and lilies and lotuses by the waterbed, little rowboats where lovers cooed over each other, and great willow trees leaned down to kiss the water banks. As they walked by the lake, William stopped to look at the little dock of rowboats, where a couple pushed off into the water. The pinks and oranges and golds and rose colors of sunset made a charming atmosphere for the water, and soon the blues and purples and violets of twilight would make it that much prettier.

  William watched the couples with a mixture of longing and resignation; wanting to join them more than anything, but knowing she couldn't.

  Pip watched William watching them. He knew she'd always wanted to ride a rowboat, every time she chanced to see one in the past, but her master either didn't notice or didn't care. He was always too busy pursuing his heart's desire. Heck, if given the chance he would just sit in a rowboat with his own sweetheart if given the chance.

  Pip hesitated. Part of him knew they had to get back soon, since the boss would chew him out for taking so long to bring her home. On the other hand, the boss never seemed to notice her until she was missing, and he knew it made her miserable. She was having such a hard time recently, and a little ride in a rowboat would make her feel better.

  Pip sighed. "I cannot believe I'm doing this," he mumbled under his breath, in his native tongue, as he approached the vendor.

  "Sorry gov'ner, it's almost dark," the vendor said, "Most of the boats will be coming in now. We'll be closed soon."

  "That's all right, we only need a short ride," Pip said.

  "You mean-?"

  "We'll rent a boat," Pip said.

  William' eyes widened in surprise.

  Not five minutes later, Pip regretted this decision.

  This was the most awkward boat ride of his life. Most of the other rowboats had pulled into the dock now that the sun had set, leaving the two alone in the water. The sun had finally set, painting the world in the deep, luscious blues, violets, purples and pinks of twilight. The ambiance was beautiful, with late summer lilies and lotuses in full bloom, and green lily pads and bulrushes covering the lake's edge. Willow trees kissed the water, creating ripples in the lake, and the babble of the man-made waterfall at the lake's edge made for a lovely orchestra as twilight birds sang their song.

  And the tension on the boat was so thick you could cut it with a knife. They both sat there awkwardly, unable to look at each or say anything. At least the girl's expression had changed from miserable to awkward, so that was a step up, but she still couldn't meet Pip's eyes as they rowed. Pip himself didn't know what to say, so he rowed on, mentally kicking himself for this disastrous idea. Part of him wanted to dock this boat right now, go straight back to the party, and pretend this never happened. But he'd already paid for this boat ride, and part of him feared that if he left now William would feel even worse.

  As the two tried not to show how awkward they felt, something rustled in the bulrushes.

  Little did they know, some magical creatures had been waiting months for the little mermaid to touch water whose source led to the sea (as the Kensington Gardens lake, at this time, connected to the Thames, which connected to the sea), and the magic had finally alerted them to her presence. They had missed her dreadfully these last several months, but they were helpless to follow her to land, and only now could they reach out to her.

  "There she is!" a cheerful young lady chirped, "See? See? There she is! I told you she was here!"

  "What about me? I'm the one who got you here! I am everywhere und nowhere!" a cocky young boy exclaimed.

  "Thank you for leading us to her, Rip and Schro," one of the mermaids told the siren and the sea devil, finally giving them the praise they craved, if just to keep them quiet.

  "There she is!" a more sensible young lady's voice chimed, "Oh, look at her! Look how much she's grown!"

  "Why does she look so sad?" another asked.

  "I don't know, I can't see anything!"

  The excessive rustling from the bulrushes drew a few curious eyes, though thankfully not from the rowboat in question, or else the jig would have been up. You can't really blame them for making a lot of noise though, since there were six of them all crammed together in the space of a commoner's bed.

  "Move over!" a young girl whispered from the bulrushes, "Move your big blubber! I can't see a thing!"

  "Nothing is happening!" the deep baritone of Baron Vincentimir Harkonnen exclaimed, a little too loudly.

  "Oh Harkonnen, how ignorant you are in the ways of love!" the siren exclaimed,
and did a little twirl in the air and landed daintily beside him. "You know True Love takes time. You cannot rush these things, you know!"

  "It's been a year!" Harkonnen bellowed, prompting the chorus mergirls to shush him, and for them all to duck into the bulrushes to avoid being seen.

  Pip and William stared for a long time, before finally shrugging and rowing on.

  "I mean, really!" Harkonnen said in a harsh whisper. "Almost a whole year gone, and that man still hasn't plucked the question!"

  "Maybe he's waiting for the perfect moment?" one mermaid said, her back pressed against a few horsetails while her mermaid's tail was draped over the shoulder of the mermaid in front of her, who was peeping between the stalks of tall grass. "A boat ride floating in a blue lagoon** is the perfect opportunity for a romantic proposal."

  "They don't seem to be enjoying it," the mermaid in front of her said, shrugging off her tail.

  "Ooh, look at him!" exclaimed one girl who wasn't paying attention. "Isn't he handsome?"

  "I don't think that's the one she came to land for..."

  "How could he not? He's tall, handsome..."

  "And she looks bored out of her mind," Harkonnen concluded.

  "Never you fear, my fat composure," Rip Van Winkle said, poking his fat belly, "What this calls for is a little vocal, romantic stimulation."

  Harkonnen sighed. "This should be good."

  The four stage hands who had been closest to William when she had worked for Harkonnen were all huddled together at the edge of the bulrushes, swooning over what they thought was a romantic scene.

  "Stand back!" Rip Van Winkle exclaimed, and pounced where they stood. Startled by the splash, they all dove into the water and scattered under the lake.

  Rip cleared her throat, and gave the best performance of her life! Unfortunately, at this moment she was suffering from a chest cold, so the music didn't come out quite as romantic as she had intended.

  Captain Bernadotte winced. "Whoa," he said, trying to make friendly conversation, "someone should find that poor animal and put it out of its misery."

  When William saw who it was, her eyes became big as plates. Pip looked where she was looking, but the "poor animal" had moved. William could only stare in horror as the well-meaning siren continued her racket from atop a tree branch. What had started out as an unbearably awkward boat ride became an unbearably awkward boat ride with the sound of a dying animal as musical accompaniment. William could only grimace as Rip gave her a wink and a thumb's up. Unable to take it anymore, William smashed her face into the palm of her hand.

  From the bulrushes, Harkonnen had to cover his ears. "Ugh, I'm surrounded by amateurs!"

  Unable to take it any more, he ordered the girls to grab some turtles, and dove into the water himself. "You want something done," he said, grabbing a reed from stalk, "You've got to do it yourself."

  Once everyone had the necessary tools, they met back at their rendezvous point in the bulrushes. "First," he instructed the girls, "You've got to create... the mood!"

  They all grinned.

  "Percussion!" he directed, and three of the girls drummed on the bellies of the turtles.

  "Strings!" he directed to the forth, who used her magic on the crickets.

  "Winds!" he directed the breeze with his own magic.

  "Words," he concluded, and drew close enough to the boat so that his voice could be heard, but far enough away so that the human's simple mind could chalk it up to the wind and not be bothered by the presence of a merman.

  Harkonnen may have been fat and lazy and slovenly, but he was a masterful singer with a deep baritone, and he could sing as romantically as the best of them.

  There you see her

  Sitting there across the way

  She don't got a lot to say

  But there's something about her...

  Captain Bernadotte slowly roused from his depressive cloud. He could not tell consciously what he was hearing, but subliminally he was picking up cues from the music of the environment.

  Even William' awkward grimace melted to a pleasant passive expression, enjoying the twilight view and the musical breeze... until she saw Harkonnen, and her jaw dropped.

  Harkonnen had emerged from the water, and he was right behind Captain Bernadotte! As the boat continued to float, he was now behind his left ear, and continued to sing:

  And you don't know why

  But you're dying to try

  You wanna: kiss the girl

  Harkonnen ducked back into the water just as Pip turned his head. He submerged so smoothly that he didn't create so much as a ripple.

  "Did you hear something?" Pip asked.

  William grinned and shrugged.

  The second Pip's head was turned, she clutched the bulwarks and leaned over the side of the boat, searching frantically. Imagine her surprise at seeing the stage hands of her girlhood, each drumming a turtle's belly and singing their subliminal song.

  'Harkonnen?! Girls?!' she screamed into her own head. 'What are you doing here?!'

  "Yes, you want her!" they all continued in unison, as subtle as the evening breeze. "Look at her, you know you do."

  Something in their voices must have spurred him, because Captain Bernadotte smiled at her and leaned forward.

  William, always hungry for attention and affection, leaned forward and grinned at him.

  It's possible she wants you, too

  There is one way to ask her

  It don't take a word

  Not a single word

  Go on and kiss the girl

  The spell was broken for William, who knew that she did not want Mr. Bernadotte that way. She quickly leaned back and looked away, not wanting to lead him or her well-meaning family on.

  Seeing her smile drop and her face turn away, Pip's smile dropped too, and he continued to row, bitterly and dejectedly.

  Harkonnen and the three girls frowned. This simply would not do. Gesturing for the girls to put down the instruments, Harkonnen smiled at them. "Sing with me now."

  The mermaids swam across the lake and around the boat as quickly and freely as eels, singing in their pretty tenors:

  Sha-la-la-la-la-la!

  My, oh, my!

  Look at the boy too shy

  Ain't gonna kiss the girl

  Pip continued to row forlornly, knowing it was useless to try to court a girl who didn't want him.

  William could only huff and sigh. 'Not him!' she thought, 'Not him! You've got the wrong one!'

  Sha-la-la-la-la-la

  Ain't that sad?

  Ain't it shame, too bad

  You gonna miss the girl

  William didn't mean to be unkind or ungrateful. She knew they meant well, but she had not seen them in months, and they knew nothing of the man she loved. She had spent so long trying to win the Count's heart, especially as he pursued another. If they had shown up at any other time, in any other place, when she and her beloved were alone, this would have been tremendous help. Instead, of course, with her luck, they turned up during the one time in the year she was completely alone by the water with Captain Bernadotte, and they directed their efforts to bringing her together with him instead of the one she loved.

  William tried to shake her head and wave them away as they sang, then started making cutting motions with her hand in front of her throat as though to say, "Cut it out!"

  When she saw Pip quirk an eyebrow at her odd behavior, she felt her face burn. She morphed her grimace into an embarrassed grin, and tried to disguise her cutting motion by rubbing her hand on her neck. Hopefully he would buy that she had just been rubbing her neck with her hand and not motioning for some mythical creatures he wasn't supposed to know existed to stop playing match-maker?

  "Look, I know you've been having a hard time since Mademoiselle Richardl King came back into the picture," Pip said kindly.

  One good outcome of the song was that it cut the tension and awkwardness that had petrified them both at the start of the boat ride. Pip
was much more loose and relaxed, casual and friendly, as he always used to be, and he spoke to her as friendly and familiarly as he had in the old days, when they used to spend so much time together. William didn't realize how much she'd missed the way he used to talk to her, until he spoke to her just now. Her frantic desire to end the song ended itself, and all she wanted was to hear what he had to say.

  "But I just wanted to let you know, just because the Count has found another girl doesn't mean your life has to end."

  William made a nasty face to let him know what she thought.

  Pip laughed. "Ja, I know. No girl wants to hear the man she loves has fallen for another."

  William grimaced. Every word out of his mouth felt like it was squeezing her heart tighter and tighter, and she glared and shook her head.

  "But you know," he continued, "There are plenty of other fish in the sea. Usually I tell that to my boys, but it's just as true for lovely girls like you."

  Still frowning, William blinked in confusion.

  "In fact, it's especially true for lovely girls like you," he said, looking her in the eye and smiling sincerely. "Men like me and the count? We move mountains for pretty girls who snatch our hearts. We dedicate our whole lives to her. Girls like you? You have the beauty to hit a man like lightning, to hold a man's heart in the palm of your hand. Your smile alone can make a man revolve around you like the moon around the earth."

  William raised her eyebrows to such an analogy.

  He took a long enough pause to light another cigarette. He inhaled a lungful of burning courage. "And I just want you to know, just because the count is spoken for, this does not mean there is not another man in the world who would... who would do anything to make you smile." He placed his hand over hers. "Who would do anything to place the world in your hands," he concluded.

  William' eyes widened, and then she smiled tenderly. Her heart swelled, and her cheeks burned.

  That old feeling was coming back again. The one she felt when he taught her how to ride horses, then laughed and teased her in that good-natured way. That feeling she'd felt welling in her chest in that cabin in the Lake District, after she had fallen and hurt herself and they sat together by the fire. She had been so sad at the time, but his kind and comforting words had soothed the wound in her heart like a balm, which spread like a pleasant warmth in her chest. That feeling had been as soft as a murmur back then, but it had never gone away. Not truly. It had come back stronger when she had rested her head on his lap as they had ridden to London together. It had come back when Walter had him bring her meals when she had been recovering from her leg, and come back stronger each time he sat at her bed and talked pleasantly by the hour. It came back stronger than ever when she returned to Carfax and they were at the horse stables again, like better times.