Bewildered Haven

by Helen Bianchin

  'It's a great shame Zachary is away,' Jane voiced with conviction. 'If he'd been here he would have riveted Max with an icy stare that spoke volumes, and poor Max wouldn't have dared cast an eye in your direction, much less have attempted to speak to you.'

  Jenny began to laugh, and soon Jane and Mrs.

  Meredith joined in. Jane's apt description had caught their imagination, and in reality their laughter was a release of tension the past hour or so had brought.

  Over a cup of tea a short while- later they planned what was left of the weekend, ensuring that they were to be absent from the house for much of the time. Elvira Hamilton appeared delighted to receive their company after dinner that evening when Mrs. Meredith telephoned her and asked if they might all come over for an hour or so. As was usual when in Elvira's company, an hour or so became several hours, and they returned home well after midnight pleasantly tired and any thoughts of Max well to the back of their minds.

  They rose late the following morning, and it was almost ten o'clock before they left the house with a picnic lunch en route to Mount Maunganui for the day. It didn't take much persuasion for Jenny to decide to travel back to Auckland early on Monday morning, despite the suspicion she held that Zachary might conceivably ring her at the flat tonight. He had known Jane was due in Auckland for the weekend, and when there was no answer should he decide to ring he would undoubtedly assume they were out visiting or perhaps taking in a Sunday movie in the city.

  The day stretched lazily ahead, and Jenny decided to make the most of it sunbathing. Mount Maunganui, Or 'the Mount' as it was affectionately known amongst the local residents, was a mountain reserve of no mean proportion at the far end of a gently curving isthmus branching out from the mainland to partly enclose the large central North Island port with its long concrete-stressed wharves. Directly across the harbour from the mountain itself lay the long pine-tree plantation island of Matakana, protecting the Tauranga Harbour from the tip of Katikati Entrance right down to Mount Maunganui. The other side of the isthmus was exposed to the great expanse of the Pacific Ocean and was well known to holidaymakers for its excellent surfing conditions.

  By mutual agreement they chose a fairly isolated spot on the oceanside down towards Omanu, and Mrs. Meredith sat in her folding deckchair beneath the shade of a sun-umbrella contentedly reading a paperback 'whodunit' while Jenny and Jane lay stretched out, on their respective beach towels well creamed with sunscreen cream soaking in the sun's warm rays. It was a glorious day, the sky a deep blue which reflected itself en to the ocean below, and there was just a whisper's breath of a breeze to tease the spray from the gently pounding breakers at the water's edge. The spasmodic cries of the wheeling gulls as they dipped and curved into the shallows below held a strange poignancy.

  Jenny closed her eyes and successfully shut out the world around her, summoning Zachary's image to mind with an ease that had devastating results. The dark gleaming eyes in his beloved face seemed to glow and she could almost sense those sensuously moulded lips curve into a twisted smile, and hear the deep voice hint with humour—'Well, Jenny-wren?' The touch of his hands on her felt so real as to be almost tangible, and such thoughts brought about a restlessness within her that was hard to bear. What was he doing to' occupy his weekend—sailing the harbour with friends; playing golf, or perhaps he too was sunbathing on a distant beach? 'Hurry home, Zachary Benedict,' Jenny bade silently. 'I need you.'

  'Do you think it would be possible,' Jane's voice intruded into Jenny's thoughts with curiosity, 'for Mother and me to stay on at your flat for a few days after you leave with Zachary on Friday?'

  Jenny sat up and hugged her knees as she gave Jane her undivided attention.

  'Mother and I will catch the early morning plane on Friday and we'd planned on spending the night in your flat afterwards, but I've been thinking that as I leave for Australia only a few days later with Sue and Emma— perhaps we could stay on until Tuesday? It seems rather silly to come back to Tauranga on the Saturday only to come up again either Monday or early Tuesday morning. What do you think, Jenny?' Jane queried vexedly.

  'I can't see that there would be any problem—the rent is paid up until the end of that week, and I'll tell the agency the flat will be vacant from the day after you leave for Australia,' Jenny suggested as she rewound her hair into a tidy knot at her nape. The sun was beginning to lose -some of its warmth and she reached for her towelling robe, then slid her sunglasses up to rest in, her hair as she turned towards her mother.

  'Do you want to stay here much longer, Mother? I'd like to wash my hair beneath the shower before tea, and an early night definitely appeals. Jane?' Jenny stood to her feet and began gathering their things together as Jane nodded and followed suit. It had been a wonderful carefree family day,- and Jenny felt rather sad that it was probably the last of its kind.

  Their evening meal of scrambled eggs on toast was followed with coffee in the lounge watching television, and the sound of a car halting in the driveway shortly after seven brought a murmur of surprise from Mrs. Meredith. Jane shrugged her shoulders and implied that Bob was away with his parents for the weekend, and both Sue and Emma Were unlikely to call without first telephoning to. make sure they were home.

  Jenny felt her heart sink as she recognised Max's voice mingling with that of her mother's in the hallway, and she mentally braced herself when they came into the room. Mrs. Meredith looked slightly flustered, and Jenny could tell that Max had all but forced his way in.

  'There are some things I must make clear to you, Jenny,' Max began a trifle pompously, and Jenny looked at him in sheer wonderment.

  'I thought I made it quite plain yesterday that—' Jenny began warily, but he held up a hand as he interrupted her.

  'It still doesn't alter what I have to say, Jenny. Look, can we go somewhere where we'll be alone?' he implored anxiously, but Jenny shook her head as Max quirked an eyebrow, in the direction of her mother and Jane.

  'No, we can't. Whatever you want to say will have to be said here, Max. I'm to be married in another five days, and nothing you can say will alter that,' she said convincingly as she met his eyes squarely.

  'I think I'll go and check thoroughly clothes for work tomorrow,' Jane said quickly, and beat a hasty retreat in the direction of her bedroom, and Mrs. Meredith indicated a need to write a letter to her sister Madge. 'Jenny,' Max pleaded softly .when only the two of them were left in the lounge, 'I love you—no, please,' be begged desperately as Jenny would have voiced a sceptical denial, 'I opted out, and I realise that could hardly have endeared me to you, but I soon discovered my mistake. I'd already booked a flight back when I got the news about Dad.' He moved closer and put out a hand to touch her arm, and when she made no demur he attempted to draw her into his arms.

  Jenny extricated herself smartly and stood eyeing him pensively. 'Max, you should never have come here. I don't particularly want to hurt your feelings, but you have to understand that I don't love you. We were friends, Max—teenage friends with a mutual liking for each other's company that somehow developed into an affection between us,' she pleaded with him to understand. 'It wasn't love, Max. We might have thought that it was for a while. You'll meet the right girl some day,' she prophesied gently. 'There's a whole world out there.'

  Max looked across at the girl whom he could have sworn he knew as well as he knew himself, and slowly shook his head in disbelief. 'You really mean it, don't you? You're not just saying that because I ran out on you.' He sank into an armchair and buried his head in his hands. 'Jenny, Jenny,' he groaned in despair, 'I love you, damn, it. I won't let you go,' he finished brokenly, and Jenny turned away in an endeavour to shut out the heartrending figure he presented.

  The silence in the room seemed to last forever as Jenny schooled herself to say the words she felt must be said if she was to penetrate his emotions. It wasn't particularly easy for her to be cruel, but she was somewhat encouraged by Max's own careless disregard for her feelings by choosing such a thought
lessly inconsiderate way to end their engagement.

  'I don't love you, Max,' she began carefully, swinging back to face him. He watched her pathetically, dejection evident as he silently waited for her to continue. 'If you're honest with yourself, and with me, you have to admit that you had doubts about our intended marriage —otherwise you could never have taken off at the last minute without so much as a word of explanation. You didn't even possess the courage to face me—you posted a short little note which you knew hadn't a hope of reaching me until you were well out of the country.'

  Jenny paused to push a stray lock of hair back behind her ear, and her eyes were expressively anxious as she willed him to understand. 'After Mother and I cancelled all the wedding arrangements,' she saw that he had the grace to shift uneasily in the chair and could no longer meet her eyes. 'I packed most of my clothes and took a fiat in Auckland,' she went on calmly. 'The last thing I was looking for was a romantic attachment with any man, and I fought against it with everything I had. You see, I wasn't very willing to trust anyone,' Jenny smiled in reflection, and marvelled that she could smile now as the past few weeks appeared before her eyes in rapid flashback. 'I'm sorry, Max,' she said with genuine regret, and as the silence dragged into minutes when he failed to make any attempt to speak to her, Jenny raised a tentative hand in a silent pleading gesture.

  Max's eyes sparked immediately alive as he caught sight of the magnificence of Zachary's ring on her finger, and his expression became slightly derisive. 'That's a mighty expensive piece of jewellery you're wearing. Well-heeled, is he?'

  Jenny flushed with anger. 'It wouldn't make any difference to me whether he had plenty of money or not,' she flung at him furiously, and tried to hold on to her temper. If it were possible she would prefer they didn't part at the end of a bitter raging row.

  'Oh, don't give me that,' Max laughed grimly, and standing to his feet he all but leapt across the spade separating them to pin Jenny's arms helplessly to her sides. His mouth became hard and relentlessly cruel as his lips evoked no answering response.

  By remaining perfectly still and not even attempting to fight him her lack of emotion was more than he seemed capable of accepting, and after what seemed an intolerable length of time he flung her away from him with a gesture of self-disgust.

  'All right, you've made your point. I won't add my felicitations for a happy future—they wouldn't be sincerely meant,' he concluded angrily as he moved towards the door, where with one hard backward stare he turned and banged out of the house.

  'It had to happen,' Jenny gestured wearily as Mrs. Meredith and Jane appeared in the lounge a few minutes later, their faces creasing anxiously as they saw Jenny's whitened face. 'I knew yesterday that his pride was hurt —that he'd make a further attempt to see me.' Defeated, she brushed a shaking hand over her hair and sank into a nearby chair, her eyes huge darkened pools mirroring a certain sadness. 'I should have driven back to Auckland this afternoon,' she looked across at her mother and the ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. 'How about a glass of sherry? I think We could all do with something alcoholic V Jenny managed a rueful grin in Jane's direction. 'Don't look so angry, sister dear. I'm still in one piece—he only tried to kiss me, and when' that proved a disaster he appeared to get the message and left!'

  'Thank heavens you're well rid of him,' Jane breathed with sisterly fury as she retrieved a bottle of sherry from the cabinet and, uncorking it, poured a generous measure into each off the three glasses Mrs. Meredith held out.

  After one glass of sherry Jenny began to relax, and by the time she'd almost finished consuming a second it was considerably later in the evening and the combination of a day at the beach and the effects of the sherry were making her feel decidedly sleepy.

  'I'm off to bed—oh dear,' Jenny yawned prodigiously and sat up in the chair. 'Don't get up in the morning, I'll get myself away. I'll meet you at the airport on Friday morning,' she stood slowly to her feet and stretched her arms up above her head. 'Aunt Madge and Uncle Dan are due to arrive at the flat around midday—I meant to tell you, Mother, that I'd had a letter from Aunt Madge confirming that she and Uncle Dan will come up for the wedding,' Jenny smiled across at both her mother and Jane. 'Goodnight,' she said tiredly as she blew them each a kiss and left the room. One way and another it had proved to be a weekend of surprises, and Jenny couldn't help feeling glad that tomorrow would take her back to Auckland and another day closer to Zachary's return.

  CHAPTER 10

  Monday seemed interminable after making such an early start, and Jenny longed for the end of the afternoon to come. Grant Ogilvie had had a full dictaphone ready and waiting on her desk when she arrived at nine, and half-way through the morning had added a sheaf of variously assorted court documents to her in-tray. Judy seemed to be nursing a shocking cold and gave in gracefully at lunch-time and caught a taxi home. There was such a mound of typing to get through that Jenny had little time to brood over the events of the weekend, or to give more than a fleeting thought to the fact that Zachary might telephone during the evening. Fleeting though the thought was, it served to get her through the remainder of the day and shortly before six o'clock Jenny slid the cover over her typewriter and flexed her aching shoulders. Only three more working days until she would cover her typewriter for the last time.

  Pleasant daydreams drifted around inside her head as she rode the elevator -down to street level and made her way across to the parking building. Zachary had alluded musingly to a faraway secluded destination, but had not named the place he intended transporting her to after the ceremony. There were so many things she needed to know —things they hadn't discussed at all. Jenny pondered over whether Zachary would require Mrs. Lowry to remain on as housekeeper after they, were married, and. children—did he share Nina Benedict's wish that they present her with a great-grandchild if possible within the next year?

  The traffic at this hour was reasonable and Jenny let herself into her flat twenty minutes after leaving the parking building. Lunch had been a hurried sandwich and a cup of coffee, and now she felt absolutely ravenous! A quick sortie into the cupboards and the refrigerator revealed a choice between eggs, tinned spaghetti, tinned baked beans or tinned sweetcorn—none of which really held much appeal. There was a take-away shop only a short drive away, and the decision made, Jenny picked up her shoulder-bag and collected the car-keys from the kitchen table. A nice big juicy hamburger with some chips to go with it—that was what she would have. It seemed quite a few people had the same idea, for the shop was filled with waiting patrons, but some fifteen minutes later Jenny was back at the flat with two small piping hot packages held securely in one hand.

  The telephone rang just as she was tearing open the paper bag containing the hamburger, and she flew across the room to answer it—her heart thudding wildly that it might be Zachary. Her assumption was correct and her heart took wings at the sound of his voice, and her greeting was gay and ecstatic.

  'That's some welcome, Jenny-wren,' Zachary mused with a warm chuckle. 'What sort of weekend did you have?'

  Caution subdued Jenny's voice a little as She pondered en just how much she should reveal. 'Jane came up on Friday to do some shopping,' she began a little hesitantly. 'And Grant Ogilvie let me have the afternoon off as I'd worked late the night before. We bought lots of things,' she went on inconsequentially, before rushing on quickly. 'Jane and I went down to Tauranga on Saturday morning—the husband of one of Mother's friends died suddenly and the funeral was Saturday afternoon. She—she thought both of us should be there, in the circumstances.' Oh, bother her foolish tongue—now he was bound to ask!

  'What circumstances, Jenny?'

  There seemed nothing else for it but to answer as best she could. 'It—it was Max's father.' There, it was out and now he knew.

  'What is the rest of it, Jenny?' he queried gently, then went on to comment wryly, 'Your voice sounds hesitant and rather lamb-like.'

  'It was something of a mix-up,' she sighed p
hilosophically, pausing to extract a chip and nibbled part of it.

  'Let me guess,' Zachary began sombrely. 'Max flew home for the funeral and discovered his ex-fiancée is soon to marry someone else,' he concluded dryly.

  'Yes,' Jenny acknowledged quickly.

  'Any unfortunate repercussions I should know about?' he queried thoughtfully.

  Jenny smiled and suppressed an urge to laugh. Zachary Benedict—jealous? It seemed too incredible! 'You can safely assume that the lamb became sufficiently enraged as to emit several long and loud lion-like roars!'

  'Indeed, Jenny-wren?' He sounded amused. 'I should have been there—you're incredibly beautiful when roused,' he chuckled deeply.

  'When will you be back?' she queried tentatively, and her voice was expressively pathetic.

  'Possibly earlier than I expected,' he told her gently, and she could have cried at the sensual timbre of his voice.

  'Zachary,' Jenny burst out quickly as she suddenly remembered, 'the roses were really beautiful. Thank you,' she said quietly, and her voice felt funny and creaky with emotion.

  'My pleasure, Jenny-wren. I shall see to it that you thank me properly when I return,' he drawled significantly, and Jenny managed a slightly strangled reply that drew an answering deep-throated chuckle from Zachary.

  'My hamburger is getting cold, Zachary Benedict,' she said with mock severity. 'It's one of those impossibly mammoth ones with egg and mushrooms and bacon as well as the usual meat and lettuce and tomato,' she enlightened him with a flourish, and couldn't suppress a laugh at the sound of the wince in his voice.

  'Spare me, Jenny. At this distance, what hope have I of competing with something which obviously has your undivided attention?' he drawled sardonically. 'Goodnight, my Jenny-wren.'