Diary of a Vampeen: Vamp Yourself for War

by Unknown

  “O.M.G. It smells so good in here. I feel like I haven’t eaten in a month!” Mel exclaimed, flipping through the menu on the table.

  The restaurant was fairly empty with a total of five couples and a large family dining in; luckily the waves crashing outside helped filter out some of the chatter surrounding me.

  Reluctantly I picked up the menu to sort through my fate. I’d decided ahead of time to seek out a steak and eggs, which shouldn’t have been difficult given the caliber of this establishment. A quick eyed skim located my order on page three.

  “Have you decided which part of the pig you’re ready to eat?” I prompted Mel.

  “I’m not thinking part, I’m thinking all,” she answered enthusiastically. “But for now I think I’ll settle with the Dream Breakfast. It has three sausages, four pieces of bacon, three eggs, hash browns, a slice of ham, two pieces of toast, three pancakes and a bowl of fruit to even the caloric field or at least trick yourself into thinking you did.”

  “Whoa! Would you like to upgrade to a size two?!”

  “Apparently Caleb would like me to. He left with Amber or “Miss Hips” last night,” she wallowed.

  “Are you serious Mel?” She just slightly nodded her head. “I’m sorry girl. But you know if he can walk away it wasn’t anything to begin with. This just means you’re available for the perfect guy when he comes along.”

  “If he comes along,” she corrected.

  “Ok, I’m gonna need you to snap out of the sap. You know that’s not true. I’m living proof of that.”

  “Good morning ladies. My name is Tony and I’ll be your server this morning. What can I get for you today?” asked a sixty-something, white-haired gentleman with a strong southern accent.

  “I’ll have the Dream Breakfast, eggs sunny side up with a diet coke to drink,” Mel spewed.

  “And just where do you intend to put it all little lady?” he chuckled in an endearing manner.

  “Oh I can hold my own, trust me.”

  “Good to know. And for you dear?” he turned towards me anticipating my order.

  “I’ll have steak and eggs. Rare steak, lots of juice and eggs over easy and extra runny with water to drink and icksnay on the toast,” I requested.

  “My, my you two are an interesting pair of customers,” he muttered. “I’ll be back with your drinks in a moment,” he announced as he collected our menus.

  “Since when do you eat rare steak and nearly raw eggs?” Mel asked the moment Tony walked away.

  “Since when do you eat the entire football team’s breakfast?” I chucked back.

  “Guess we’re both full of surprises,” she replied.

  “More than you know,” I commented, though she was oblivious to the truth weighted within my statement.

  “Here are your drinks ladies. It’ll be just a few more minutes for your food,” Tony said as he set down our beverages.

  We both echoed a quick, “Thanks.”

  “Ok. So dish. Tell me everything I missed at school. I’m super nervous about Monday.” I took a sip of my water.

  “You didn’t miss much really. And after last night I doubt anyone will talk about the old stuff. Congrats. You’ve replaced a thousand rumors with one… you!” she exclaimed with sarcasm and dread. “Seriously Lex what are you going to tell those people when you can’t even tell your bestie?”

  “I don’t plan on telling them anything. It’s none of their business. Plus I guarantee every speculation will be wrong, but even if I told the truth, the pops would twist it. They always do,” I replied. I took a risk. I delved into reality with my words praying she held tight in respect for me and my vow of silence on the subject. I’d gained and lost so much these last few weeks. I wanted to be able to share with my best friend. There were so many limitations preset by vamp laws and secrecy, but, outside of the security, I wanted to be able to breeze through the loopholes with Mel. I didn’t want to lose our open relationship built on trust and honesty.

  “The others may let it go, but you know after last night that Jenny will not. The witch is going to be hot on your trail for the rest of the year.”

  “She’s the least of my worries. There’s not much she can do or that Kellan will let her do. I’m more worried about Mike. Did I tell you he showed up prepared to fight me last night?”

  “O.M.G. Lex! No! You sort of left that one out. Dish!” she yelled, a cross between excitement and horror choking her breath.

  I detailed the night, minus the vampeen and vampire bit. Keira, the vampire radical who had been murdering vampeens during their twenty-four hour transformation, had worked with my ex, Mike, to take me down. They, nor I, expected the end results. I lost control and attacked her; gave her a solid run for her money and ended up winning. Kellan’s dad, Al, a vamp army officer, completed the job. Of course I couldn’t tell this to Mel so I stuck with the innocent parts. I told her about Keira being Kellan’s ex, her teaming up with Mike and even went as far as to detail our fist fight but on a human scale.

  “Holy sugarplums Lex! I’m so mad. I totally missed all the juice! I can’t believe you actually got into a fight! You. Calm, quiet, bookworm Lex kicked butt. Amazing,” she reveled in my memory even though our outlooks differed on the events.

  “You know what they say about the quiet ones,” I shrugged revealing a sly grin. We both broke into laughter at the same time as Tony delivered our food.

  “Whoa Mel! Do you want the antacids now or later?”

  “I’ll probably need both but it will so be worth it! This looks delish,” she squealed inhaling a bit of eggs simultaneously. “Mmm… so good…” She closed her eyes and let out a moan of pleasure clearly enjoying the meal before her.

  “I will take that as my queue to leave. Let me know if you need anything,” Tony advised before stepping away.

  “Cool it with the big-O Mel. It’s breakfast not a porn meal,” I scolded lightly.

  “That was sad Lex. Pornmeal… as in cornmeal? I get it but… so lame,” she sighed, shaking her head in mock disapproval. “And if you were eating at all you would probably share in my ecstasy.”

  “So I bit the slim jim and didn’t retain my appetite. I’m not anorexic and am going to eat. Look.” I sliced a piece of the steak from the rarest point – the center – and started chewing.

  “That’s my girl,” Mel smiled with a mouth full of food.

  The rest of breakfast continued just the same. Of course we were able to squeeze a bit of talking amidst Mel’s pleasure-fest. In the end I was able to consume just under half my meal before I got away with a “stomach ache.”

  “Well if you didn’t insist on eating the cow that still moos maybe your stomach wouldn’t hurt,” she pressed as we stepped into the elevator.

  “Yea, yea. Do you really need to play mommy dearest and scold about preference?”

  “Nah. I guess not. What are you and Kellan doing today?” she asked as we stepped out of the elevator onto the maroon carpet. I will never understand the drab carpet taste of hotel owners.

  “Not sure yet. You?”

  “I’ve got to be home by noon. My mom has a “work function”,” she stated, her fingers emulating quotation marks.

  “Nice. So I take it you have babysitting duty?”

  “Of course.”

  “You’ve been watching Kyle a lot lately.”

  “Ugh. Don’t even get me started,” she groaned. She swiped the card for her room. As we walked in, I observed the neat and tidy room overhauled by room service while we were out. Every item had a place. I smelled the lingering scent of detergent implying fresh linens on the bed and new towels had been delivered. I was surprised however to see little butter mints on the pillows. I’d only heard of such a service but never seen it at any of the swanks I’d visited.

  Amidst scanning, I heard my mother speak from down the hall. “Lexi, your father and I are going out. Your aunt booked the rooms until tomorrow so don’t check out. I love you and your father loves you too.”
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  I said a quick, “Ok, love you too,” while Mel was gathering her toiletries from the bathroom.

  I listened quickly for Kellan but didn’t hear him in our room. I decided this was the perfect time to involve Mel in my plan.

  “Ok, so I’m going to need your help. I’m working on something top secret, a surprise, for Kellan.”

  “Ooh. Sounds good. I’m all ears,” she perked up as she plopped down attentively on the bed.

  “Okay. Well since we came back from vacation (the lie I had to tell her while I went through the change) he’s been in a bit of a funk. He won’t admit it but I know he misses his best friend Craig from Seattle. So my little plan is to surprise Kellan by bringing Craig down for a visit. Where you come in is in a few places…” I detailed topping it off with a pleading expression.

  “Name it and you got it. But I have to be allowed to video K’s reaction,” she stated, squeezing her hands together in her lap.

  “Deal but no YouTubing it,” I compromised. “Now I need you to distract Kellan for a bit so I can call Craig. I plan to steal his cell for a sec to extract his number. Then when Craig arrives, I have to pick him up at the airport so I’ll need you then,” though mentally I was picturing him racing on foot. “And last. You know I love you and I’ve so done this for you before so you have to say yes. You’re tied by bestie obligation.”

  “Just give me my sentence,” she demanded.

  “You have to go on at least one double-date with us.”

  I braced myself for her adverse reaction, a phase of whining followed by a sitcom of whimpering pleas, but I received none of that. I glared at Mel taking in all of her. She appeared calm, thoughtful.

  “That’s it?” she finally broke the silence with.

  “Yeah…”

  “Oh. Well consider it done,” she breezed. “So when are we calling this guy?”

  “Well I’m here until tomorrow with my family and Kellan so I’ll try to steal his phone for a sec today. How about we plan for tomorrow afternoon? Say two-ish?” I proposed, speaking a bit fast since I heard Kellan coming our way. It amazed me how distinct he was to me though his stride was no different than another human; he had mastered it.

  “Okay. I’ll have my mom drop me off.”

  “Oh, speaking of. How are you getting home right now? Do you need a ride?”

  “Nope. Your aunt has me covered. Now go enjoy your day!” she pushed shooing me out the door.

  “Well then. I know when I’m not wanted,” I cried sarcastically.

  “Oh shush!” she yelled throwing a pillow at me as I wedged through the door.

  “One last thing,” I yelled.

  “What now?”

  “Thanks for everything. I really did love the party.”

  I heard her saunter off the bed and walk towards the door. “Anything for you Lex. You know that,” she smiled.

  “Y tu tambien,” I replied, returning the loving adoration spread on her face.

  “Uh. English?”

  “You too.”

  “Thanks. Now go!” she ordered closing the door on me.

  Okay. Something strange was going on. It was definitely like Mel to be bossy, but certainly not like her to kick me out. She either knew something or was up to something. Either way I supposed I’d find out soon enough.

  Chapter 2

  A surprise it was… for me from Kellan. It was a one day trip to Carowinds. He claimed the rush you get on a roller coaster was simulative of the one you get from sprinting full speed and of course the invincible feeling we always carried as immortals. I hated to admit he was right. It wasn’t nearly as petrifying knowing no matter what transpired while aboard the coasters I would survive with no sustained injuries, but I enjoyed it the same. I enjoy every moment with Kellan. Despite the cliché of it, he really does complete me. And the little things, like protecting me when I was mortal, teaching me how to fight vamp style, gifting me his most prized possession – his red iPod- and surprising me with little trips and outings , they are the icing; he, of course, is my cake.

  Yesterday he surprised me but today it’s my turn. I successfully retrieved Craig’s phone number; thank God for my photographic memory. Mel was at my house “bonding” with Kellan and I was “out for a run.” We coordinated it so she arrived just as I was beginning to sprint down the sidewalk.

  As soon as I was a neighborhood over, I pulled out my cell and quickly punched in the phone number. I called out a silent prayer that Craig would answer. It seems luck was on my side because he did.

  “Hello?” answered a slightly husky yet perky voice with an Aussie accent.

  “Hello, Craig?”

  “Ah. Let me guess. I’m speakin with the infamous Lexi, the one who has my mate in a bunch,” he said, laughing a bit through.

  “Well I guess there’s no need for an intro. How are you?”

  “Ace! How’s my mate Kellan doing?”

  “Good but well…”

  “He’s in the dark about this call,” he finished my sentence before adding, “No worries love. I won’t spill your secret. My question though is to what do I owe the pleasure of this chat?”

  “Not sure if Kellan has told you openly or not but he’s a bit isolated here. He doesn’t talk to many people or go out unless it’s with me. He’s in a slump and I was hoping you would be available to come for a visit. You know… for male bonding and all that fun guy stuff. I really think it would help him. And you wouldn’t have to pay for anything. Umm… so… you up for a visit to the south?” I asked on pins and needles for his response. I never thought this through before but he could say no. I suppose at that point I could book us a flight to Seattle but with school and all that would be a bit tough to work around.

  “You really care about him. You know. I like you Lexi. You’re not like the other earbashing dolls he’s been with. You’re genuine; no banter and plastic. I can tell you’re good for him,” he raved.

  “Thanks but he’s done far more for me than I have him.”

  “Oh no love. You didn’t know Ellan here.”

  “Ellan?” I laughed.

  “That’s just a poke at ‘em! We fiddle each other like that all the time. I call him Ellan and he calls me Blair.”

  “Blair? You so have to tell me,” I giggled feeling as if I was talking with a friend rather than a stranger across the country. Already I could tell Craig was the type of person who made you feel warm and welcome in his circle from the first hand shake.

  “Oh no. I’ll gift my mate with sharing that story,” he chuckled. “But you have done ockers more for him than you know. He’s a changed man. And you must be quite a catch for him to have taken to you like this. He’s surrendered his donger and doesn’t even miss it.”

  “I think that’s a compliment…”

  “Oh absolutely. If he wasn’t my best mate I’d be stealing you for myself.”

  “Thanks. So are you free to come meet the infamous Lexi and spend some time with your best mate as you call him?” I asked, crossing my fingers for a good response.

  “I would love to. How soon can we arrange this holiday?”

  “How soon can you get here?”

  “By foot? Tuesday. By plane? Tomorrow,” he replied.

  “It would be by plane, and I can book you a flight tonight for tomorrow sometime,” I offered.

  “No worries love. I’ve got it covered. I’ve been planning a visit to your state anyways. I just lollygagged on the date.”

  “O, ok. Well let me know if you need me to cover anything. And I have two guest rooms at my house if you can’t stay at Kellan’s.”

  “No worries. I could sleep outside if I had too,” he chuckled.

  “Well you won’t.”

  “Good to know. So shall I text you my arrival time or map my route on foot?” he asked half-jokingly.

  “I will personally be your chauffeur, so text me your arrival time and I’ll be there.”

  “Thanks a bunch love. My mate definitely got tinny
with you. Of course if you can’t make it work I am a single man.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind,” I acknowledged half-heartedly. “And thank you for coming. I know Kellan will be happily surprised.”

  “Anything for Kellan. And thanks for the call love. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Ok. See you then,” I replied before closing my phone.

  All I could think was wow. Craig was nothing like I thought yet so much more. And the accent… I never assumed he was Australian. Who would’ve thought? I like him though. People say the fate of a relationship lies in your connection with his/her best friend. Based off Craig and Mel, Kellan and I are solid. And after chatting with Craig, he sounded perfect for Mel. This was so exciting and I had no doubt that I would be successful in my plan, or should I say both plans… surprise Kellan and play matchmaker.

  “Did you have a good run?” Mel asked calmly the moment I walked into the living room. Judging by her eyes though she was anxious for all the details.

  “As a matter of fact I did. I had a very successful run. I’m thinking about going for a drive tomorrow afternoon though instead,” I smiled knowing she would catch on.

  “I’m not oblivious to code,” Kellan commented.

  “What code? Please detail K,” Mel requested combing Kellan with our girl language.

  “Nevermind,” he mumbled. “Carry on.” He retreated to my room leaving me and Mel on the couch.

  “So… don’t hold me in suspense!” she quickly whispered. “Tell me all about him. I want to know all the details. What did he say to you? Did he sound hot on the phone?”

  I sliced my pointer finger across my throat signaling for her to cut it right there. Kellan could still hear everything, the same way I could hear him… Hear him leaving through my bedroom window. It’s too late. He’d heard Mel’s side of it; the very misleading verbiage she presented.

  Panic set it. It set yet I was frozen. The time I actually needed to move fast I couldn’t. I was stuck; stuck sitting with a broken dumb-founded look on my face.

  “Lex? Are you okay?” Mel asked, full of concern.

  Nothing. I could say nothing because at that moment I knew he was gone. He left without giving me the chance to explain.