Divinity

by Michelle L. Johnson

  The dog looked up at Natalie, then back to Julia’s room in between barks. It had the strangest look in its eyes. They seemed almost human, trying to give her a message. Natalie followed the dog’s gaze and gasped as she saw the shadow of a man outside the window behind Julia’s crib. Running in, she swept Julia out of her crib, clutching her tightly. Natalie’s heart was pounding so loudly it was almost deafening.

  Despite all the commotion, Julia didn’t make a sound. She looked at her puppy and smiled as though she thought it was all a great game. The enormous figure on the other side of the pane leaned over to pick something up, even as Lori’s frustration started to come through in her voice.

  “Now listen to me, Natalie. You open up this door right now. I’m just here to see my granddaughter. Let me in and you won’t get hurt. Let. Me. IN!” Lori rattled the door handle as she yelled.

  “Get out of here, Lori!” Natalie shouted. “You’re all crazy! I’ll call the police!”

  As the shadowy shape on the other side of the nursery window pulled back its arm, ready to hurl the large rock he had picked up, the dog uttered one last loud bark—a triumphant-sounding bark. Natalie could hear the sounds of feet on the walkway, headed away from the house. She heard the car doors open and then slam shut. Then she heard them start up and drive off quickly. She risked peeking out the window and watched, trembling, as the cars created the same billowy clouds of dust trailing along behind them.

  Her ranch hand had pulled up in his old pickup truck and the thugs had left immediately.

  The now-quiet puppy sat down and waggled its tail happily, as though nothing unusual had just happened. Natalie looked at her incredulously. She knew that, if the dog hadn’t barked like that, she wouldn’t have gotten the windows and doors locked. She shuddered to think of what would have happened next.

  “Well.” She sat, leaning over to pat the puppy with trembling hands. “I know what to call you now.”

  Julia supposed Natalie had repeated the story so Julia would be grateful for the life Bill and Natalie had given her, saving her from the crazy part of the family, so she had never thought much about it. Natalie had had many ways to make Julia feel disinterested about her birth family, and because of all these stories she had never asked who her real father was. She wondered if Natalie had known the truth.

  The family had moved within days in an effort to stay out of the reach of Lori and her goons. Nobody knew why she had shown up that day, why she had tried to abduct Julia or what she had planned with her thugs.

  It seemed bitterly ironic that Natalie had fought to keep Julia safe then, when only a few short years later she was willing to turn her back on Julia and cast her out in order to “protect” her son. Julia shook her head, refocusing on the puppy’s story.

  As Julia remembered how and why her adoptive mother had decided to name the dog “Gabriel,” goose bumps covered every inch of her skin, and the hair on the back of her neck stood up. She squeezed her eyes shut briefly, as if the act would make her wake up from the memories, and kept driving.

  “Gabriel,” she murmured, realizing that the more pieces of this puzzle fell together, the more outrageous it seemed. She recalled Natalie telling her why she had chosen that name that night. It seemed the dog reminded her of the Archangel Gabriel blowing his trumpet at the gates of Heaven with all the barking that day—the messenger of Heaven.

  “Anyways, I thought it was poetic,” Natalie used to say, waving her hand dismissively, indicating the end of her story. Somehow she always managed not to spill her trademark glass of scotch.

  “So,” Julia said to herself, “the dog was no coincidence. I suppose that means ‘they’ placed her on the road that night.” Her eyes rolled to the sky when she said “they,” though she wasn’t sure exactly to whom she was referring. She shivered again.

  Julia craned her neck up slightly, catching a look at her own shining eyes in the reflection of the rear-view mirror. For the first time in her life, she thought, I have my father’s eyes.

  They were pooling with tears again. She had not reflected on those memories for many years. The pain of the nightly visits from her brother crept back in, overshadowed by the pain of finding out that Natalie had known all along, and that she blamed Julia.

  Julia almost felt sorry for Natalie—unable to ever put that drink down, unable to live with her own guilt. Almost.

  “God knows she had enough to feel guilty for,” she muttered, then caught her breath. God knows. God knew all along, or at least, Gabriel did. And he had let that continue.

  Teeth grinding, Julia refocused on the road ahead, her resolve strengthening. Yes, she thought, it’s time to learn more about my real family.

  “I do not think she is ready for the truths she will find upon that path,” Gabriel said. He stood amidst the clouds, peering down through the opening at his feet. He could see Julia driving along as clearly as though she were beside him. “She should not be reconnected with Maria.”

  “She will do as she wishes, Brother,” Michael said. “They were given free will, remember?”

  “It is too soon after learning of…” Gabriel’s wings shifted uncomfortably, “…me.”

  “What, then? A distraction?” Michael asked, raising an eyebrow.

  “You said you were going to guide her. Perhaps now would be a good time.”

  “Good time for what?” Uriel stepped between Michael and Gabriel, his wings arched high over his shoulders.

  “Uriel,” Gabriel greeted the newcomer with a nod, closing the viewing portal with a wave of his hand. “I thought you had some of the physical plane’s environmental issues to contend with.”

  Uriel shot a dismissive glance toward Gabriel. “I have many issues to contend with, Gabriel. And I do deal with them. Rather unlike you, who sits up here, brooding and spying upon the humans. Who has your interest today?”

  Gabriel shook his head. “As always, Brother, we are discussing the elevation of man’s consciousness.”

  “A confoundedly slow process,” Uriel scoffed. He looked from Michael to Gabriel, pressing his lips into a grimace. “In time, all things come to light.”

  When he was certain Uriel had disappeared, Gabriel turned to Michael. “He need not know about her until such time as she is ready to step into her rightful place.”

  Michael nodded, lifting his head. “I will provide a distraction for her. Perhaps we can satiate her new thirst with knowledge of her paternal birthright.”

  Gabriel let out a breath of relief. “Good. I think she needs time.”

  “She needs to know many things, Brother. Many things.”

  VII

  JULIA parked her car in the driveway, locked it up, and headed for the front door, eager to get inside. She thought she might be able to summon Gabriel somehow. Failing that, she at least wanted to go to sleep. After all, he had said he would speak with her in her dreams next time.

  The hair on the back of Julia’s neck prickled and a shiver ran down the length of her spine. She peeked over her shoulder, half-expecting to see someone watching her. The walkway was empty. She turned, surveying the length of her street. All the usual cars were parked in their spots, the streetlights were on, and her neighbors were inside their homes.

  Frayed nerves, she thought. That was all.

  She turned back to her door, sliding the key in the bolt lock. The harsh smell of a backed-up sewer hit her and her hand shot up, instinctively covering her mouth and nose.

  “Ugh!” Julia hurried in the door, shutting out the nasty stench behind her. The air inside her townhouse refreshed her; the hint of cinnamon immediately soothed her.

  A glance at her watch told her she had a small window of time in which to catch Charlie online, so she kicked off her shoes and headed for her laptop.

  She had received two emails from Sandra, the manager of her restaurant, one with the daily sales and one with the subject “new staff.” Julia opened the sales report first. She smiled. Ever since she’d hired Phillipe, busin
ess was finally on the upswing. He was a Red Seal Chef from Montreal, and well worth the salary he demanded.

  Eyeing the new staff email, Julia reluctantly opened it. Sandra had had four interviews scheduled out of the resumes Julia selected and only one showed. Sandra had hired him. Julia grimaced as she read. Something about three people not showing up for their interviews didn’t sit well with her, especially in this economy. She wrote it off as raw nerves and closed the email window. Right now, what she really needed was a friend.

  The instant messaging window popped up, and Charlie was online.

  “Thank God,” Julia said, then shot the ceiling a sheepish look and cleared her throat. “Er, thank goodness.”

  Julia: You there?

  Charlie: Not for long. HE’s on his way home.

  Julia paused before hitting send on her next line, staring at the thumbnail of Charlie. Her long blonde hair swept over her shoulder and she had looked directly at the camera with a teasing smile. It was a first-rate selfie, her big, soulful eyes pulling the viewer in. It was Charlie’s eyes in this very picture Julia had stared into over the last few years as she poured out her heart via keyboard. A flood of guilt hit her for not telling Charlie what was going on. For that matter, she hadn’t really told Alex, either. She hit enter, sending the lie across the internet.

  Julia: It’s just good to ‘see’ you. Sometimes I feel like you’re the only one I can talk to… you know?

  Charlie: Awww! I do know! I feel the same way about you. *hugs* How was your dinner?

  Julia: Good.

  Another lie. Ugh.

  Julia: Will you be on later?

  Charlie: Not sure. He’s home! Gotta go!

  Charlie’s avatar grayed out. She was gone. Julia frowned, but her disappointment was overshadowed by her concern. She hoped Charlie’s boyfriend hadn’t caught her online. The last time that had happened, he threw her computer across the room. It took her months to replace it and find the courage to come back online.

  Julia had been trying for two years to convince Charlie to leave him, but every time she mentioned it, Charlie pulled away and got defensive. Julia did her best not to mention it now, for fear of losing the woman who was so close to her heart. It was a strange thing, to have a best friend on the other side of the planet, but from the first time they’d spoken, they’d felt a strong connection. Within hours of their first chat they were finishing each other’s sentences. Julia always thought that, if she had had a twin, Charlie would have been it.

  Julia sat back in her chair, meshing her hands behind her head. It was funny, she thought, sitting here, worrying about her friend when her own life was so uncertain. She laughed. “Uncertain” was definitely an understatement. The pit of her stomach knotted again with conflicting feelings about Gabriel. She looked out her sliding glass patio door. Some air would be good.

  Remembering the odor, she cracked the door open and took a sniff. The air was fresh and cool. A small victory.

  She was halfway out the doorway when she noticed the mist, gathering and hanging in the trees. Her feet froze on the patio. The bluish mist dripped down between the branches, weaving together the same way it had when Gabriel appeared. The shape was different this time, though, as was the feel of the mist. Her heart was in her throat.

  If Gabriel was real and could visit her in a physical form, it made sense that there were other beings who could do the same thing. She knew not all of those beings could be on the “higher being” end of the spectrum. Julia shivered.

  “Gabriel?” she croaked, barely a whisper.

  As the form solidified, she was further convinced it was not Gabriel at all. She didn’t know how she knew, some unknown instinct or perhaps part of the abilities she had yet to discover, but this one seemed larger to her, yet less severe. Stronger and more unyielding, yet almost relaxed. It felt to her like a paradox of substances. And she sensed it had humor, of all things, as though the very act of appearing to her in this way was amusing to it. She relaxed when she felt certain this being was not a threat, and it solidified into a similar form as Gabriel. Obviously an Archangel, this one had black hair and skin, and deep, dark eyes. His wings were broader than Gabriel’s.

  “Who are you?” Unbidden, the name Michael popped into her mind.

  “Relax, girl.” The deep, booming voice reverberated through the treetops. “I came to say hello. Introduce myself. Clear up a few misconceptions.”

  The familiar feeling of soothing energy that had accompanied Gabriel surrounded Julia, washing away her anxiety and filling her with an unnatural calm. Or rather, filling part of her. Another part of her became silent and watchful, evaluating the situation.

  “Yes, I am Michael,” the Archangel began. “Yes, I should seem familiar to you; I have been with you for many years.” His dark eyes twinkled with delight.

  The Archangel Michael. Julia’s hands trembled, and she lowered herself into one of the wicker chairs. She wasn’t entirely sure how the whole angel thing worked. Maybe she had pissed Gabriel off enough that he had sent Michael to “collect” her. Maybe she had made a fatal mistake. Was it a sin to have anger toward an Archangel? She swallowed hard and clenched the arms of her chair.

  “A sin to be angry?” Michael laughed. “If that were the case, the entire human race would be damned. If you keep thinking up your questions so quickly, I am going to start answering them in the same way. That won’t be comfortable for you, and it will take you a lot longer to process the information.”

  “Won’t be comfortable?” she asked when she found her voice. “I don’t understand. What do you mean process the information?”

  “I mean, use your human voice. Wait for your answers. I’m not going anywhere. Slow your thoughts. Instead of hurling your questions at me, say them and let me answer.” Michael paused, his wings settling onto his back. “When we send messages to humans, often all the human will hear is a very high-pitched squeal that can be almost deafening. It then takes weeks, sometimes years, for the human mind to process and accept the information.”

  Julia could only stare at Michael. She had heard that very sound on many occasions, and usually got one of her blinding headaches afterward. Some tests had been done when she was younger to determine the cause of the pain, but none was found. Eventually, she had just learned to live with it.

  “Our messages are absorbed into the human system,” Michael continued. “Into the subconscious. They process as if they were instinctual knowledge. And, as you well know, humans are utterly infuriating when it comes to their innate ability to disregard their instincts.”

  Yes, Julia had a lot of practice ignoring her instincts, but she wasn’t about to admit that. She grimaced and continued to meet Michael’s unwavering gaze.

  Michael chuckled. “Fortunately for us, you are only half-human, so you have been successfully learning to follow your instincts. This last year, anyway.”

  He paused again. She felt him studying her thoughts. It was an effort to slow her mind and focus on one question at a time.

  “Many years?” she asked. “How many years have you been with me? You do feel familiar, I’ll give you that.” She was fascinated that even though her insides were in complete turmoil, she addressed Michael with ease. Not just Michael, but the Archangel Michael. The second Archangel she had met, and God’s second in command—as she understood it.

  “Yes,” he rumbled. “All of your years, actually. I am your guardian. And the quick answer to your next question is—I volunteered. I have my reasons, which I’m not ready to share with you. Eventually I will, but not now.”

  “Okay, Michael.” She thought briefly of calling him “Mike,” but decided against it. She could no sooner do that than call Gabriel “Gabe.” Or “Dad.” She took a deep breath. “Will you please tell me why you couldn’t have just come to me and told me what was happening? If you’re my guardian, why didn’t you help me throughout my life?”

  Julia was surprised at the difference from her earlier temper tantr
um with Gabriel, but in an odd way, it made sense. It’s one thing to have someone you have never met abandon you and quite another if it’s your father. She looked up at Michael, and the beauty of the angels hit her again. It was difficult to stay angry with that loveliness radiating from him.

  “The thing is—you’re human,” Michael said. “At least, you’re half-human. You have choice. We can only give you the tools you need. It is still your choice whether or not to accept them.”

  Give her the tools she needed? Everything in her life she had worked for. Fought for. Even her inheritance had come after a long battle with her brother. In fact, she thought, the only thing ever to touch her life that wasn’t hard work was Alex. Her mouth dropped open.

  Michael raised his hand and answered her before she could ask. “No. Alex was not a tool, exactly, but he was necessary for your well-being. He brought you back from the bleak place you had fallen into. We always made sure that you had everything that you needed. Sadly, you often chose to turn your back on our gifts.”

  “Gifts!” Julia thought if her jaw opened much wider, it might unhinge. “What gifts?”

  Michael threw his head back and laughed. He reached forward as though about to rest his hand on her shoulder, but stopped just short of touching her.

  “You aren’t able to see clearly, girl. My Brother is right, you truly are clouded.” As his laughter subsided, his eyes pierced her gaze, capturing her mind for a moment.

  “I’ll show you.”

  Julia looked around and blinked. She found herself standing at the checkout in the grocery store where she had worked in high school.

  A kindly woman with frazzled, curly hair passed Julia a business card on her way through the checkout. Crazy Hair told Julia that if she was interested in helping her with some research, she ought to give her a call. Crazy Hair said that she had gotten her name from the honors list at her school. The lady told Julia that she would pay her well, but Julia would have to leave her job at the grocery store immediately.