Bring Me Flowers (Garden of Love 5)
Page 18
Selecting several possibilities, she went to the dressing room and tried three different outfits, deciding on the lightweight sweater and long black skirt. It would be perfect if Jordan wanted to go for a walk after dinner. They had been having some warm days this week, but the evenings were still cool.
Taking her selections to the counter, she decided to get some new nail polish on display too. She wanted to get a nice pair of light-colored sandals to replace her old ratty ones and went to the shoe store next door. After finding a pair that cost a little more than she liked to spend, she proceeded to the bath and body shop to check out their new line of fragrances. She liked the spring body spray and the matching silky lotion. Working at the grocery store always made her hands rough. This would be sure to help.
The following day Abby felt renewed and alive, despite working six days straight. Even the heavy weekend crowd and impatient customers didn’t get to her. Smiling until her cheeks began to hurt, she was more than ready for her shift to end. During the last half-hour she began to get nervous and messed up twice with two different cranky customers.
“Oh, well,” she thought, closing her line and preparing to head for home. “I’m not spending this evening alone at least.”
She checked her messages on her way out to make sure Jordan hadn’t canceled on her, drove home, took a warm shower, and spent an hour getting ready for his arrival. She paid attention to details, making sure she chose the right bra that looked best under her new sweater. She pulled her bangs to the side and used clips to keep them out of her eyes . She brushed her teeth until they glistened and used mouthwash, making her mouth feel tingly and kissable. Coloring in her thin eyebrows, putting a touch of eyeliner under her blue-green eyes, and using her favorite pink lipstick were the finishing touches.
Jordan arrived right on time, looking a little more casual than she expected. He hadn’t said where they were going to dinner, and she hoped she wasn’t overdressed, but he told her she looked nice, so she tried not to worry about it. She would rather be overdressed than underdressed for an evening out with someone as handsome as Jordan.
He opened the car door for her when they reached the parking lot, and she slipped into the seat of the nice Mustang. He went around to the other side and got in, starting the car and turning down the music a bit.
Telling herself to not be mousy tonight, she tried to think of something to say other than responding to his questions with one-word answers, but she felt too nervous to voice anything that popped into her head. Halfway to the restaurant, silence surrounded them, and she began to feel a familiar panic. She wanted to speak but felt paralyzed. I’m going to blow this.
Jordan began to look uncomfortable. Tears stung her eyes. This was not going to turn out well, she knew. This was going to be her first and last date with Jordan. A guy that was so far out of her league, she had no idea why he had ever asked her out in the first place.
***
Pulling into the restaurant parking lot, Jordan prayed hard. He needed God’s strength to get through this evening. He didn’t like having to hold up the conversation. How could anyone be so quiet? Didn’t she have anything to say besides, “fine,” “okay”, and “yeah, I know what you mean.”?
He felt better once they had been seated and given menus to scan. He noticed her bury her face behind hers and take quite a long time deciding. She didn’t lay it down until the waiter came to take their order, and even then she seemed indecisive.
After they were alone again, the silence became more uncomfortable, and he began saying anything that came into his head, things that were uninteresting to him and probably boring her to death, but at least they were talking.
No--he was talking. Abby only nodded and laughed occasionally. He did notice she had a nice smile and tried to be as witty as possible to make her use it more often.
By the time their meals arrived Abby seemed to be more relaxed, but they ate mostly in silence, commenting on the food here and there. He had gotten some seafood and asked if she wanted to try a bite. Looking embarrassed to be eating off his fork, she tentatively took the small portion and appeared to like it. He offered her more, but she politely declined. He got the feeling her response had more to do with her self-consciousness than the taste of the assorted shellfish.
“How long have you been working at the supermarket?” he asked.
“Since high school,” she replied, setting down her fork and taking a sip of water. “I tried going to college for awhile, but it wasn’t for me. The pay is good there so I don’t see any reason to go anywhere else.”
He thought she sounded embarrassed that she hadn’t finished college and about her blue-collar job. His heart went out to her. She was obviously very sweet and hardworking, two things that rated much higher in his mind than a college degree. He wasn’t quite sure how to phrase the compliment so he refrained, but he wanted to make a special point to make her feel good about herself somehow during the evening.
“What do you do?” she asked, taking him by surprise. She’d actually asked him something. Maybe she was beginning to warm up a bit. He told her about working with his dad building and remodeling homes. His grandfather had been a logger and started the family business. His dad had taken over about ten years ago, and Jordan had decided to join him after graduating from college with an Economics degree that he had absolutely no plans to put to good use.
Abby’s eyes began to water and she coughed a couple of times. He wondered if she had choked on something, but seeing her take a long drink of water, he supposed she was all right.
She began rubbing her lips together and wiped them with her napkin. She blinked her eyes rapidly again and began to look flushed.
“Are you okay?” he asked, setting down his fork and reaching for her hand.
Her eyes darted around the room, she coughed some more. “I feel really strange all of the sudden,” she said. “I think I’ll go to the ladies’ room. I’m sorry,” she said and practically ran from the table.
Something wasn’t right, and he knew it was more than shyness and low self-esteem that had driven her away. Rising to follow her, he didn’t catch up with her before she disappeared into the restroom. He waited outside for a few minutes, hoping she would come back out, but when she didn’t, he went to find a female employee.
“Could you go check on my date?” he asked the hostess. “I think she might be sick or something.”
The young woman went to check and emerged shortly. Hurrying to the desk, she picked up the phone. “I’m calling 9-1-1,” she informed him. “Did she have any shellfish?”
Remembering the bite he had given her of his meal, he sighed and nodded.
“Looks like she’s having a bad reaction.”
Listening to the hostess talking to the 9-1-1 operator, he wondered if he should go to Abby, but he decided to wait. He felt relieved when another employee hurried through the lobby and went in to help. He decided to go outside and wait for the paramedics to arrive, feeling completely helpless and terrible for the way this evening had turned out.
CHAPTER FIVE
Abby opened her eyes and looked around. Feeling disoriented, she tried to figure out where she was. Plain white walls surrounded her. Attempting to push herself up, she felt a slight pain in her hand and discovered a tube coming out of her wrist. Slowly everything came flooding back. I got sick at the restaurant. They rushed me to the hospital. That was all she could remember.
Closing her eyes, she wanted to shut it all out and pretend she was having a nightmare. But she knew this was real. Her date with Jordan had been a complete disaster. She began to sob.
“Shh, it’s okay,” she heard a soft voice say. Someone took her hand and squeezed her fingers gently. “You’re okay now.”
Opening her eyes once again, she saw Jordan’s face through her pools of tears. She rubbed her eyes, and he handed her a tissue. “How do you feel?” he asked. “Do you want me to call the nurse?”
She supposed she felt oka
y. She could breathe fine, and her lips and throat felt normal, although incredibly dry and parched.
“I’m okay,” she replied, hearing her voice quiver with emotion. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, closing her eyes again and wondering how long Jordan had been waiting for her to wake up. I completely ruined his night.
“You’re sorry?” he laughed. “I’m the one who should be sorry. I was the one who gave you a bite of my food.”
She felt confused. What did his food have to do with her getting sick?
“Did you know you’re allergic to certain types of shellfish?” he asked.
“N-No,” she replied, wondering if there was any water around. Her mouth felt like cotton.
“I don’t eat much seafood,” she said, feeling a little better now that she knew what had happened and that it wasn’t her fault. She wondered if anyone had called her mom.
“Is there someone I can call?” he asked, as if reading her thoughts. “I tried to call Kendra, but she didn’t pick up. I didn’t know who else to try.”
“M-My mom,” she sputtered, feeling close to tears again. Having to take a moment to think, she told him the numbers, hoping he understood her groggy voice.
“I’ll be right back,” he said, releasing her hand and stepping away. Once he left the room, she allowed the tears to come. She felt so embarrassed and helpless.
Jordan returned a few minutes later, saying he’d reached her mom and that she was on her way. He sat with her once again, bringing on the uncomfortable feeling of silence between them. She wanted to pretend to fall asleep, but she had to go to the bathroom very badly. Knowing her mom was at least fifteen minutes away, she decided to ask him to call the nurse.
He stepped out of the room to give her some privacy while the nurse helped her get out of bed. After she returned, she sat up in the bed and let her head clear a bit. She covered herself with a blanket in case Jordan came back. The hospital gown wasn’t quite as flattering as her new outfit had been. She wondered what had happened to her clothes, who had removed them from her, and how much Jordan had seen. The thought made her clutch the blanket closer to her chest when he came back into the room.
“You’re looking better,” he said, taking a seat on the stool beside the bed. “How do you feel?”
“Okay,” she replied.
He smiled. “That’s good to hear. I’ve never had a girl pass out on the first date before.”
She smiled at his light teasing. “This was a first for me too. Usually I’m much more boring, I promise.”
“We’ll have to give it another try,” he said. “Now that all the first-date jitters are out of the way.”
She looked at him evenly. “Jordan. You don’t have to.”
She felt her throat constrict and winced at the pain, remembering how strained her throat had felt at the restaurant. Closing her eyes, she wished he would leave and put them both out of their misery.
“I know I don’t have to,” he said. “I want to.”
She opened her eyes and looked at him, knowing that was the only way to judge if he was being honest with her. The times she had looked earlier in the evening had told her something wasn’t right. He wasn’t quite himself. She had tried to convince herself everything was fine, but she knew there was something she was missing, even before he began to tell her what it was.
He reached for her hand and held it gently. “But, before you say anything, I have a confession to make.”
“What?”
“I asked you out as a favor to Kendra.”
Pain gripped her heart. She didn’t want to hear any more.
“Now before you get mad, I want you to know something.”
She snatched her hand away. “Please go,” she choked out, wanting to curl up and die. She didn't think this evening could get any worse, but it had.
Jordan touched her cheek and waited for her to look at him. Swallowing her tears, she sniffled loudly and used every ounce of strength she had to keep from crying outright.
“I’m sorry, Abby,” he said. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. Please forgive me.”
She didn’t reply.
“Let me make this up to you. I want to take you out again--”
“I don’t want your pity,” she snapped. “I suppose Kendra has told you about my bad choices in men, but I’d rather go out with one of them than with someone who feels sorry for me.”
“I don’t feel sorry for you,” Jordan replied, sounding truthful. “My motives were much more selfish than that.”
Suddenly everything made sense. Guys like Jordan were interested in girls like Kendra, not her.
“You like Kendra,” she stated, filling in the final piece of the puzzle. “You asked me out to score points with her.”
“Yes,” he replied. “I did. And I’m sorry for that. That was wrong, and you have every right to be mad. I’m mad at myself for--”
“And you want me to forgive you so you can stop feeling guilty, is that it?”
He dropped his eyes and gave up the fight. “No, Abby. I’ll be feeling guilty about this for a long time, I promise.”
Getting up from the stool and moving it out of the way, he stood beside the bed and took her hand again. She wanted to snatch it away, but something about his touch made her wait. He could have walked out, but he was still here.
“I want you to forgive me so that I can take you out again and get to know the real you. The real Abby behind those shy blue-green eyes and tentative smile. Did you know you have a beautiful smile?”
Looking down at her hand being held in his warm fingers, she felt a tear trickle onto her cheek. He reached up and brushed it away with his thumb.
“Give me a chance to chase those tears away. Give me a chance to make you smile again. Please?”
Abby’s eyes moved to the door, seeing her mother step into the room.
“Are you all right, baby? What happened?”
Jordan released her hand and stepped away. Her mother took over, invading their space and not letting Jordan get in another word. After assuring her mother she was fine, she introduced Jordan and saw her mother smile with delight.
“I should get going,” he said, reaching for his jacket. Part of her wanted him to leave and to never see or speak to him again, but another part of her wanted him to stay and talk to her all night. He had sounded sincere, and she wanted to believe his words of apology and desire to see her again, but what if he got to know the real Abby and decided he didn’t like her either? Then what? That seemed more depressing than having him reject her because she was too shy to be herself.
Stepping toward her before turning away, he kissed her on the cheek and spoke in a low voice. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
He left the room, and she allowed her mother to fuss over her, taking a sip of water and listening to her mother ask about when she could go home. Within the hour she was in her mom’s car. She spent the night at her mom’s house, slept in the next morning, and spent a relaxing day with her mother. She hadn’t seen her for a few weeks and decided she needed to come visit more. Her parents had been divorced since she was fifteen. She hadn’t seen her dad in three years.
She called her boss and asked for Monday off. On Monday evening her mom took her back to her apartment. She hadn’t realized it until Saturday morning, but she had left her phone at home when she’d gone out with Jordan. Picking it up from the bed where it had been sitting all weekend, she checked her messages and saw that Jordan had called, several times. He had left her two voice mails. One from Saturday, and another from earlier today. He still wanted to see her, but he was leaving that up to her to decide.
***
Kendra felt awful. She tried calling Abby again, but only got her voice mail. She’d already left three messages and supposed she needed to back off and give Abby some time. She had never meant for her little matchmaking scheme to go so terribly wrong.
Sitting down at her computer, she decided to email Trevor. She told him all about running i
nto Jordan and trying to set him up with Abby even though she knew he liked her instead.
Why do my good intentions always get so messed up, Trev? I’m surprised I actually have any friends left.
The following evening she decided to stop by Abby’s apartment. Knocking on the door, she knew she would be home by now, but she wondered if she would answer the door. She was about to turn away when Abby opened it.
“Do you hate me for good this time?”
Abby smiled. Kendra took the opportunity to step forward and give her a hug. Abby clung to her.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, rubbing her back and swallowing her own tears.
Abby invited her in and graciously offered her something to drink. Kendra took the lemon-lime soda and walked to the couch, taking a seat and being prepared to listen, apologize again, or do whatever Abby needed from her right now. She was surprised when Abby spoke first.
She told her about what Jordan had said at the hospital. Kendra knew most of it already from what Jordan had told her. She was glad to hear Abby had heard basically the same thing.
“Do you think I’m a complete idiot for wanting to give him another chance?”
“I think you’re brave, Ab. And I think you have a very big heart to forgive both of us. Give Jordan a chance to see that heart. That’s why I wanted him to ask you out.”
“But what if I can’t do that? I always go into a date with someone like Jordan wanting to be talkative and act normal, but then I don’t know what happens. I clam up and feel paralyzed. I don’t think going out with him a second time is going to change that.”
“I hate to sound cliché, but you’ll never know unless you try. Maybe the whole shellfish incident was exactly what you needed to break the ice with Jordan. Maybe going out with him again will be completely different, and if not, at least you’ll know you gave it a chance.”