Luke shook off the feeling of guilt and walked away. He entered his apartment and reached for the remaining whiskey on the coffee table and took another shot. He sat comfortably on his black leather couch and scans through the television channels.
Chapter 19
It was Monday morning. Luke woke to the familiar sound of ear piercing tones from his alarm clock. He rose and walked to his bathroom. After relieving himself, he marched to the kitchen. He filled a bowl with cereal and milk, stepped into the living room, and watched the morning news.
After breakfast, he wrapped his hand with the same clear plastic bag and took a shower. After brushing his teeth, he got dressed and left for school, the cold and harsh late November temperature forcing Luke to dress in thicker layers that morning.
He walked into his first class, and was instantly reminded of the quiz that he forgot to study for during the weekend. He decided to wing the exam and try to pass it. He looked over at a classmate and asked, “Excuse me. Hey, do you know what all will be on the test today?’
His classmate looked over at him, and while expressing an aggravated look, he said, “It’s on state politics. You would know that if you showed up to class more often.”
The classmate looked forward and accepted his test from the teacher’s assistant. Luke looked on and reached out for the three page assignment.
After the class ended, Luke walked out feeling unaccomplished. It was the first test he had taken at “USM” where he wasn’t prepared. Hoping that the trend didn’t last, he walked to his second class.
He entered his communications room and took his seat in the back. He pulled out his binder and pen and navigated through the tabs of the organized school folder, stopping at the proper section and prepared himself for taking notes. He reached in for his course book as the teacher made an announcement.
“Okay, so I have thought long and hard about what we talked about last week. I think I will go ahead and divide you guys into a group for the next assignment. I have the names of the groups and when I call out your name, I want you to section off and discuss your topic. I’m giving you guys this class period to decide your presentation. After today, you won’t be able to work on your project in class. So, decide where and when to meet and we’ll go from there.”
The teacher called the names, and anticipation built among Luke and his peers. Working her way down the list, the teacher finally called out “Lucas Cardellini” and instructed him to move to group 3. Luke rose from his seat and walks to the other end of the classroom. He takes a seat among four members of the class and realizes that he has never met any of them.
Luke remained silent as a self-proclaimed leader of the group took charge and began assigning different sections of their provided topic. She then passeed around a sheet of paper with her name in the top corner and instructed the group to neatly write their contact information.
When Luke got back to his apartment, he felt the urge to call Anna. It was hard for him to get away from the routine he and Anna had set up for that time period. But instead, he sat at his desk and started thinking about his assignment for the next group meeting.
Finding it extremely difficult to focus on school work, Luke decided to take a break and lay down. He searched for his phone and decided to send a text message to Enzo.
“Dude, I’m still so... whatever. I just don’t know what to do anymore… I haven’t talked to her in over a month, and it’s killing me?”
Enzo responded almost two minutes later.
“I don’t know man, I mean Anna was a cool chick but what she is doing is fucked up.”
“I think that maybe it’s time to try to finally move on.”
In anticipation, Enzo wrote back,
“What about that one chick you were telling me about… that Audrey chick from upstairs?”
‘I don’t think I’m going to see her around anymore…”
Luke got ready for work. He changed into a shirt and tie. He walked past the dining room and reached past the beer bottles and grabbed his coat. He threw it over his shoulders and then slightly pulled the bottom half in an effort to ensure a comfortable fit. He opened his front door as Alan attempted to unlock it from the outside. The two looked at one another for a moment before continuing on their paths.
Luke sat at the nursing station, filing paperwork, when he heard a call that one of the patients that entered in before his rotation, had just passed away. Nervous, and scared, Luke realized that he has to walk past the room still occupied by the deceased on his way to his next patient.
Luke continued slowly as he passed the room. Out of curiosity, he turned his head slightly to his right and briefly looked in. In his moment of observation, the nervous young man watched as two gentlemen prepare the body and place it in a large black bag on an electric hydraulic gurney. Luke felt a bulge build in the pit of his stomach. He rushed to the closest restroom for immediate relief.
Luke soon completed his shift and walks through the automatic sliding glass doors. He looked towards the emergency overhang and noticed a few co-workers outside on a smoke break. Luke started making his way towards them, preparing his cigarettes as he gets closer.
He found shelter from the chilled breeze and lit one end of the cigarette. He stood next to the two women wearing solid white scrubs. He remained silent as he overheard the two who were in steady conversation.
“It was so sad, what happened to that young man. I hate nights like this.”
“I know what you mean. That guy was my son’s age. I can’t believe someone would shoot a person point blank like that. What is wrong with people today? These kids are all hyped up on that meth and crank or whatever.”
Luke threw his butt on the ground and ground the end with the heel of his left foot. He placed his hands in his coat pockets and began walking to his vehicle.
Luke took the morning to sleep in, missing all his early classes. When he finally woke, he stepped over to the window and opened his long dark curtains to let the sunshine in. After taking his morning dose of painkillers, he showered, brushed his teeth, and got dressed. He remembered that he had a group meeting in his communications class that afternoon and prepared himself to leave his apartment.
He walked to his vehicle and began making his way to campus. After parking his vehicle, Luke exited and while at a slow pace, he passed by the building that was currently holding the meeting. He quickly decided that he did not desire participation. But in order to avoid the possibility of confrontation, he sent a text message to the group leader as he cautiously returned to his vehicle,
“Sorry… feeling ill. Gonna stay in today and get better.”
Luke passed the theatre and as his vehicle entered his sight, he felt his phone vibrate. He removed the device and read the response from the group leader,
“Whatever, it’s your grade. You need to tell me now whether you are going to contribute at all, because I get the feeling you could not care less about all this.”
Appalled at the accusation, Luke quickly responded,
“What? You don’t know me! I will see you at the next meeting!”
Luke felt a bit of pride. He slid his phone back into the front left pocket of his blue jeans.
Luke carried a sense of confidence while preparing himself for work. He changed out of his day clothes and put on a clean crisp white shirt. He looked at himself in the mirror and decides to wear his favorite tie.
Luke reached to the top of his closet and pushed aside the large black liner containing pictures of him and Anna. He pulled down a neatly folded black tie displaying fine thin red lines creating a marvelous and appealing visual amusement. Luke unfolded the tie and wrapped it around his neck. He tied a perfect knot just under his collar and observed his appearance once more in the full length mirror.
He nodded his head with what he saw as he left his room. After passing the kitchen on his way to the front door, he looked at his watch and realized that he still had almost forty minutes before he had to le
ave for the hospital. Luke took a brief look around his dwelling and decided it was a good time to clean up the trash.
Twenty two minutes had passed when Luke took hold of two bags filled with debris with his left hand and made his way out of his apartment. He reached the large over- filled dumpster just feet away from his apartment building and discarded the bags on the top of the mountain of trash.
He brushed off small particles of dried beer from his hand and again felt his front left pocket begin to vibrate. He quickly retrieved his phone and discovered a new text message.
“Hey Luke. It’s Whitney. I just wanted to touch base with you. I’m heading back to Tupelo tonight and didn’t hear from you last night, but if you are still interested in seeing each other, I can make it this evening.”
Feeling the instant warmth provided by increased stimulation centered from his core, Luke smiled and responded.
“Yeah. That would be great! I have to work till 10. Just message me when you get to Wiggins.”
Luke continued to smile as he unlocked his vehicle and entered. He turned the key and was immediately greeted by hot air warming his chilled exposed face. He pulled out of his parking spot and headed towards the hospital.
An hour into his shift, Luke walked into a patient’s room. He saw a man sitting on the edge of his bed staring down at the floor. Luke walked in the room, greeted the man, and took a seat. He walked the gentleman through the paperwork and noticed the tone of the depressed man. Feeling sympathy, Luke stepped out of protocol and asked the man what was troubling him. While tears poured from his battered face, he asked, “The woman in the other room - is she okay?”
Luke took a moment to step out and noticed a large black bag being loaded onto a hydraulic gurney. He stepped back into the room, calmly closing the door behind him. He looked as the gentleman placed his face into the palms of his hands. Luke noticed a silver band on the man’s left ring finger and realized who he was speaking of. Luke said while taking a seat, “I’m sorry.”
The man continued to cry as Luke excused himself from the room. He walked towards the nursing station, placed his paperwork down, and excused himself for a smoke break.
Shortly after completing his night at the hospital, Luke headed home. While eagerly awaiting an indication from Whitney on her location, Luke contemplated calling her. But not wanting to seem too desperate nor wanting to appear as though he was rushing the young ginger haired woman, Luke decided to continue waiting for her call.
Luke got home at a quarter past eleven. He took a seat on his leather couch and waited patiently to receive the call. He reached for his remote control and felt a slight vibration from the middle of his lap. He quickly answered the phone and placed it to his ear.
“Hello. Whitney?”
Luke sat and waited for a response. Silence fills the conversation as he became convinced Whitney’s phone accidently called his cellular device until he heard a voice whisper, “I should have never left Hattiesburg. I love you.”
Confused, Luke immediately checked his phone and discovered Anna’s number in the center of the screen. Nervous, he wiped the sweat from his brow and with a nervous tone, he responded, “Anna, what is this? What is going on?
After a moment, Luke pulled the phone away from his face after realizing Anna had ended the call.
Luke continued wiping the sweat from his face while taking a deep breath. While attempting to relax his shaking body, he felt a pain develop in the center of his chest. He reached for the coffee table and removed his pill bottle. His hands continued to shake as he unscrewed the top and threw it across the room. He removed two capsules and placed them on his tongue and swallowed.
He felt his heart slow to a less painful pace and picked up his phone. While feeling more relaxed, Luke searched for Whitney’s number. Less than four seconds later, Whitney answered.
“Hey, sorry! I know I was supposed to call and I just got to Hattiesburg. What is your address again? I’m going to put it in my GPS.”
“Whitney, listen. I’m sorry. I’m not feeling too good. I think I’m going to cancel our date tonight. I’m so sorry…”
Luke waited as he heard Whitney take in a deep breath and respond, “Well, I was going to stay up there tonight and then drive back to Tupelo in the morning. But maybe I’ll just drive back to Biloxi or head straight home from here. I don’t know. Just call me when you feel better.”
Luke became speechless as he heard Whitney ending the call. After searching the apartment for alcohol and coming up short, Luke decided to call it a night.
Luke finally rose from his bed at just after two in the afternoon. After missing all his classes and another group meeting, he threw on a pair of pants and a filthy white t-shirt. He found his keys on the dining room table and stepped outside. He enjoyed a cigarette before makes his way to his vehicle. He entered and took his time driving to the liquor store around the corner.
He arrived home and quickly prepared a strong drink. He started by consuming three shots before mixing five into a large hard plastic cup. He poured in just the perfect amount of cola and took a seat on his black leather couch.
Over four hours later, Luke arrived at work. As he stumbled to clock in, he was approached by his supervisor.
“Luke, what the hell? Are you drunk?”
“No.’ Luke slurs, ‘I’m… fucking great… no problem here… where am I starting on the rotation tonight?”
Luke’s supervisor leaned in closer to Luke and smelled his breath. After waving her hand in front of her nose, she pulled Luke by the sleeve and dragged him closer to the wall.
“Luke, what are you doing, man? You need to get out of here before anybody realizes that you are drunk. Open your eyes, Luke. You are a mess! Look, just leave, I’ll just say that you got here and you started vomiting. Go home, use your next two days off and get yourself better, man.”
Luke slurred through more radical speech before accepting the free pass. He places his arms around his supervisor, hugging her tightly. He then leaves the hospital and takes his time driving back to his apartment to sleep it off.
Luke woke the next morning to several text messages from the leader of his communications group informing him of an emergency meeting. Luke jumped out of his bed and threw on a pair of khaki pants and a polo shirt and made his way towards campus.
He rushed to the third floor of the library and calmly entered the quiet private room where the other members of the group sat and waited for his arrival. Luke took a seat close to the thin wall and prepared his notepad and pen for the meeting.
The self-proclaimed leader excused herself from the room and requested that Luke join her outside. Luke placed his belongings on the floor next to his chair and followed the assertive young lady. She closed the door behind him and stated, “Look, I’ve been talking to the professor. I think she is going to go ahead and take you out of our group. After you didn’t show for the last two meetings, and you haven’t turned in your part of the assignment, we as a group voted you out. She said you can call her or stop by her office if you have any questions.”
The young woman walked back into the room, leaving Luke standing confused.
Luke walked back into the small space to get his belongings. Before exiting, he turned around and addressed the group.
“Fuck each and every one of you pieces of shit. I don’t need you, I don’t need anybody! I hope you all choke on this fucking project.”
A sudden shared blank look had spread among the remaining members of the communications group as they continued to stare at the troubled young man as he slammed the metal door shut then slowly walked to the elevator.
Luke arrived home shortly after. He entered his kitchen and poured himself a drink. He took comfort in his usual location on the couch. He pulled his phone from his pocket and text messaged Audrey.
“Hey, I hope you are doing well. Miss talking to you. Sorry again for fucking your life up.”
Luke eventually passed out on the couch. When he
finally came to, he checked his phone and discovered that his father had called him. Too depressed and ashamed to call him back, Luke decided to make another drink.
Luke reached the point of incapacitation. Slouched over the couch, and on the verge of blacking out, Luke received another call. He lifted his phone up to see that it was his sister Nicole calling. Luke answered the phone and said, “Hello? What the fuck is going on… Who is this…”
“Luke. Hey, what is going on? I haven’t talked to you in forever! Is everything okay with you?”
Luke stumbled through the thoughts in his mind before finally responding,
“Um, yeah… I’m… solid. Just one day at a time, you know… I’m kicking it at home, sipping a little whiskey, and enjoying not having to worry about a goddamned thing.”
“Well.” Nicole responds, “We are all worried about you. You don’t visit or call home. It’s like you don’t exist. Dad is worried sick about you. Will you at least call him?”
“Yeah, sure. I’ll call him sometime.”
Luke ended the call and threw the phone to the other end of the couch.
A while later, Luke found comfort on the dingy floor of his apartment and began dreaming. He is in the middle of the desert, surrounded by nothing but sand and sunlight. A car approaches him, going full speed. Luke raises his hands and yells to the car to stop, but realizes he doesn’t have a voice. Scared and nervous, Luke is soon left in the dust as the car passes.
The young man awakened to flush, sweaty, pale skin. Still in the midst of his intoxication, he rose from the floor and stumbled to his bathroom. He took a moment to look at himself in the mirror, and realized it’s a moment too long. Luke comes to the conclusion that his life wasn’t worth living any longer.
Adaptation of the Chameleon Page 25
