Trusted by You

by Amy Muscat

  “I've gotta go to London? When?”

  “Monday. I had Hayley contact Miss Wright telling her about you going; she seemed really excited. I also wanted to ask if you wanted Hayley to join you in London?” My mum says, speaking up for the first time.

  “Monday? That’s a little too soon, don’t you think? Could you not have done it for, I don’t know Friday, maybe? Or mid-week?”

  “I know it’s soon, but we thought what with you loving this particular author, that we should get it all sorted right away,” my dad replies back to my questions.

  “You’re right, I do. I can’t wait to get her signed and this book out on the shelves. Have you booked my flights and all that? Where am I staying?”

  “Your flight is booked; Hayley has all the details, and we didn’t know if you wanted to stay with Nan or wanted to stay in a hotel. So we haven’t booked anything yet, it’s entirely up to you.” Mum tells me.

  I groaned. It’s not that I didn’t love my Nan, I did, but she drove me nuts whenever any of us visited her. She tries to get us to move back. Even though she understands that it was better living in New York City and the business being here, she didn’t like it: she always made you feel guilty. Saying how we left her all on her own– even though she has three other children, my dad's siblings, and had eight grandchildren to keep her company.

  “I’m gonna get Hayley to book me a hotel. I don’t think I can handle staying with Nan. I'll go and see her and that, but I am not staying with her, sod that. She’ll drive me bonkers.”

  They just laugh, knowing full well what my Nan is like. She was my Dad’s Mum, and my Dad was the eldest out of her four children. I don’t remember my Mums parents, they both died when I was young, and my Mum had no siblings.

  “Okay darling, we’ll get Hayley onto it, don’t worry. I totally understand; I don’t think I could stay with Marilyn for more than a day myself.” My Mum says shrugging when my Dad gives her a look. “Don’t give me that look, Michael, you couldn’t even stay with your Mum for that long either.” When he concedes, she smiles smugly over at him and he just rolls his eyes at her before he gives her a loving smile.

  I laugh at their antics. Even after being with each other for more than twenty-five years, they were still very much in love. I loved watching them banter with each other; it was like they had their own language.

  “Okay, I'm going to go, before you start making goo-goo eyes at each other,” I say fake shuddering. I stand up and give them both a kiss on their cheeks. “See you guys later, love you’s,” I call out over my shoulder hearing them say it back.

  As I walk out, I give Tim a wave and walk down to my office, seeing Hayley sitting outside at her desk.

  “Hales, will you book me in a hotel, and then send over my itinerary, please?”

  “Yeah, sure Lottie,” Hayley says to me, pushing her black-framed glasses back up her nose. “Any preferences of hotels you stay in?”

  “No, I don’t, but would you mind setting up a car for me? I don’t want to be getting taxis everywhere.” Cabs in London was a nightmare, I’d rather drive.

  “Sure,” she says typing on her computer. “You want the same car you have now or don’t you mind what you drive?”

  “I don’t mind, preferably a four-by-four, it’s what I'm used to driving, so any sort of big car would be best, please.”

  She’s typing as I talk and a minute later she double clicks something and says, “All done.”

  “You’re the best, Hales,” I say to her, being honest. Hayley was the best assistant I could ever have. She was efficient, punctual; she knew what to do without me asking. As I said, she was the best. “I wanted to ask if you wanted to come with me? I know your Mum’s still recovering, but I didn’t know if you wanted to come. I understand if you can’t.” Hayley’s Mum was recovering from having surgery on her leg: she had been in a car accident two years ago and they could never afford to have the right surgery, so her Mum was left with basically a bum leg. But after saving up enough, they had finally been able to afford it, and her Mum had had her operation three weeks ago. So I didn’t know whether she would be okay with leaving her or not.

  “Erm… I don’t know if I can. My mom's still not fully recovered, I mean yeah my Dad’s there and so are my brothers, but you know what I'm like; I don’t like to leave her.” Hayley says running a hand through her short hair.

  “I understand if you can't come, then you can’t; it’s fine.”

  “Can I let you know by tonight?” She asks hesitantly.

  “Yes, of course.”

  “Thanks, Lottie, I mean I would love to come to London, it’s like the dream city to visit, but I'll have to check first.”

  It always makes me laugh how people, Americans, wanted to visit London, and everyone in England wanted to visit New York City.

  “No problem love. Right I'm gonna go, I've gotta pack and you know that’s going to take me forever, so I better get a head start.” And tell Blake that I would be leaving in a couple of days.

  “Okay, I'll let you know as soon as I know.”

  I wave at her and tell her to go home as soon as she has everything sorted.

  I'm walking to my car when I feel someone behind me. I look over my shoulder and spot someone I really didn’t want to see right now. Lucy.

  Instead of stopping and talking to her, I carry on walking to my car.

  “He still loves me you know!” She shouts out.

  I pause, and not wanting to take the bait, I ignore her again.

  “Did you know that he accepted the job to protect me?”

  Now that stops me in my tracks.

  “Say that again?” I spin around and watch as a smug smirk fills her face.

  Fucking whore.

  “I said that he accepted the job, you know to be my personal bodyguard?” She taunts, emphasizing the word ‘body’.

  I snort. “No, he hasn’t, don’t lie. He told me that he turned the job down. He doesn’t want to be anywhere near you. I don’t blame him, really. I mean, you are a dirty, cheating whore. Who the fuck in their right mind would want to be?” I spit nastily at her. I can feel myself become worked up. I so wanted to hit this bird, it was unreal.

  “Fuck you,” she snaps.

  “No, fuck you, sweetheart. I'm wasting my time standing here talking to you. I don’t need to listen to lies,” I say about to walk off when her next words stop me and make me pivot around again.

  “If you don’t believe me, then why not call Blake and ask him, then? What scared?” She asks sarcastically.

  “Of what?”

  “That I'm right?”

  “About him accepting the job?” I ask raising an eyebrow at her.

  “Not just that. About him loving me still.”

  “Let me tell you something love, I know for one hundred per cent fact that Blake doesn’t love you anymore. In fact, he fucking despises you, actually hates your guts. Thinks you’re a good for nothing cheating whore.” I know in my heart that I'm right and that Blake has no feelings of love what so ever towards Lucy. “Do yourself a favour and get the fuck away from me. Otherwise, the only person anyone will have to protect you from is me.”

  Without waiting for her response, I walk to my car and leave her standing there in the middle of the car park.

  WHEN I ARRIVE BACK to my flat, I try and call Blake but I get no answer from him. After the fourth call and him not answering me, I get the feeling that he’s ignoring me.

  Angry, I more or less stomp to my room. I was acting like a petulant child, I know this, but what Lucy had said to me was now filtering through my head, and making me think things.

  He didn’t still care for her did he? No, he didn’t… maybe he did, though. I mean they did say that there was a thin line between love and hate…

  Fuck!

  Okay, stop it now Lottie, you’re being stupid, I scold myself.

  To keep my mind and hands busy, I begin packing for my trip. Two-and-a-half-hours later, I'm
all packed and ready. But, I still hadn’t heard anything from Blake, and it was pissing right off.

  I walked into the kitchen, made myself a chicken and mayonnaise sandwich, grab a can of Diet Coke, and move into the living room. I was flicking through the channels when there was a loud knock at the door.

  I placed the can of coke on the coffee table and went to open the door.

  I wasn’t too surprised to see a sheepish Blake standing there.

  “Oh… look who’s here.” I say with some bite in my tone.

  “I’m sorry, my cell has been off. I didn’t charge it last night,” he says running a hand through his inky-black hair. I watched as his muscles bunched up and flexed at the movement, and had to stop the audible sigh from coming out. “Can I come in? I've gotta tell you something.”

  “Yeah, sure,” I say stepping back and letting him in.

  After I shut the door, I walk into the living room, turn the TV volume down, and then slump down on the sofa. Blake sits down next to me, looking resigned.

  “So after you left, I got a phone call from Rob, and he asked for me to come into the office today. So I went and he told me that there was no one else to do the job that I had turned down.”

  “What the one where you have to become the whores, personal bodyguard?” I ask knowing that I'm right.

  “Yeah, that one…” He sighs, defectively.

  “So, did you take the job?”

  “Yeah…” He tenses, awaiting my response.

  I look away from him, straight at the TV, nodding my head. “Right. Right…” I abruptly stand up and walk to the kitchen. I flick the kettle on and while waiting for the kettle to boil, I start washing down the sides, just to give myself something to do.

  “Lottie…” Blake's voice travels from the other room. “Why have you walked away from me?”

  “Because I can.” I'm being short with him, I know, but I don’t care. Insecurities are flying, and it’s pissing me off. I'm not normally an insecure person.

  “That’s not an answer,” he says walking in and joining me in the kitchen. I can feel him behind me; can hear his breathing in my ear. “Now answer the question properly: why did you walk away?”

  “Because I'm pissed off!” I burst.

  “Angel, I understand why you're angry– I'm not pleased about the whole thing either– but can we talk about this like adults, please?” He says in a persuasive voice.

  I spin around and bump into him. “Are you calling me a child?”

  I could see his temper start to rise. “No, I'm not. I asked if we could talk about this like adults.”

  “Yeah, you did,” I say with attitude. “But you're insinuating that I'm a child– or at least talking like one.” I fumed up at him.

  “No, I'm not! For fucks sake, Lottie, why are you being difficult?”

  “I'm not, I'm just saying don’t call me a child or say that I'm acting childlike. It’s not that fucking hard.”

  Breathing in, and looking for some help, Blake looks up to the ceiling as he talks. “Okay, I'm sorry for unintentionally calling you a child, I never meant to. Can we just go sit back down and talk about this?” He asks looking at me now and there’s a pleading in both his eyes and his face that makes me nod my head and follow him back into the living room.

  I sit where I sat only five minutes ago, but instead of sitting next to me like I expected, Blake sits on the coffee table facing me. He clasps my hands in his, dwarfing them.

  “Lott's, there was nothing I could do. Rob called me in and explained to me that he had already signed the contract with Lucy's Dad. He didn’t know we had history, and when he had first approached me about the job, I had said ‘yes’ without even asking the details– which I'm kicking myself about– and had obviously gone ahead and signed the contract with Richard. Rob tried to get out of telling him that he could help find another company for him to use. But Richard said that he couldn’t and that he had already signed, stating that he would be using James Security& CO.”

  “Fucking wanker.” I interrupt.

  A small smile graces his handsome face before he carries on. “Yeah. So it was basically don’t do the job and let Richard sue the company or suck it up and do the fucking job. I couldn’t let Mr James get sued, you understand that, right?” The pleading was back.

  Deflated, I slump back into the sofa, letting go of Blake's hands, and crossing them over my chest. “Yes, I understand; I'm not happy about it, not at all. But, I understand. I wouldn’t want to put Rob in that sort of shit just because I'm not happy that you will be protecting the slut. I'll just have to deal with it, won’t I?”

  “Yes, you will Beauty. I don’t start until next Monday, so we’ve got a week before then to prepare…” He trails off when he looks at my face. Now I have the sheepish look on my face. Narrowing his gorgeous eyes, he asks, “What?”

  Clearing my throat, I tell him, “I've gotta go to London next week, well Monday to be precise, for work.” I look up at him from under my lashes.

  “What? London? Fuck, for how long?”

  “About a week. I'm going to sign that author I was telling you about, you remember?” He nods. “Yeah well my Dad wants to sign her, he thinks she’ll make it big. He asked another team to read through her book and after the reviews from them, he agreed.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me? When did you find out? ” He shoots off the questions.

  “I was going to tell you when I saw you earlier. I just found out this morning; that’s why my Dad asked me to come in today,” I say, baffled about why he looks a bit pissed. “What’s the problem, here?”

  “I just though we’d get to spend the week together before I had to go and work for Lucy. I'm just disappointed that’s all,” he replies.

  But there's something in his voice that irks me.

  “Well, I'm sorry Blake, but it’s work. It’s my job.”

  “Well, why can’t she fly over here?”

  “She has a kid, Blake, that’s why.” Is this man for fucking real?

  “What? So you're saying that because she has a child that she can’t travel? What a load of bullshit,” he snaps, surprising me.

  “Don’t snap at me, Blake! There's no need for you to act like a prick, is there? This is my fucking job, and sometimes in my job I have to travel to sign authors. Sometimes they come here, but not all the time. I don’t like that you're going to be a bodyguard for your ex who– I might remind you– cheated on you. With two men.” I lean forward and get in his face as I raise my voice.

  He got even closer, so we were nose-to-nose. “I remember, Lottie, there's no need to throw it in my face, is there?” I could see the rage building up and consuming him. “How dare you bring that up like that?”

  “I'm sorry…” I whisper. “I shouldn’t have said that it was wrong and petty; it just came out in anger.”

  “Yeah, you shouldn’t have, but you did, and right now? I don’t even want to look at you. I'm gonna go, and I'll most probably see you when you get back,” he says standing up.

  I'm sat, stunned, as he starts walking to the front door. But then I snap out of it. “Hey! Don’t just walk away from this, talk this out with me. I'm sorry for what I said, I shouldn’t have, but you pissed me off.” When he just carries on walking, I start shouting. “Blake! Don’t walk away you fucking coward!”

  He stops walking and spins around so quickly; I'm surprised that he had been able to keep his balance.

  “Coward? Fucking coward? Ha! That’s rich. I'm going to go now before I say something that I know I'll regret saying… Have a good time in London, Charlotte.”

  Charlotte? He never calls me that. Never.

  Hurt, I call out to him just as he reaches the door. “Don’t worry, I will! Have a good time being bodyguard to the whore!” I say to his back.

  I watch him stiffen, and for a second I think he’s going to turn around, but then his head drops and walks out.

  I feel my eyes water and my lip tremble, and before I
lose it; I move back into the living room, pick up my phone, and call the one person I need right now.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey Pey, can I come around? I need you.”

  “HERE,” PEYTON SAYS holding out a box of tissues to me.

  “Thanks,” I reply, taking the box and plucking a couple tissues out. I blow my nose with one and wipe my eyes with the other.

  I'm sitting in Peyton and Keller's house, on their sofa, and crying my eyes out.

  I bet I looked how I felt; like shit.

  Peyton sits down next to me looking both upset and worried. She lays her hand over mine and gives it a squeeze. “Lott's, what happened?”

  Taking a shuddering breath, I tell her the whole story.

  “My Dad called me this morning and asked me to come into work. So I went to work, and he tells me that we’re going to be signing an author that I've been championing, you the one I was telling you about? Layla?” At her nod, I carry on. “So yeah, I'm all excited about signing her, but then my Dad tells me that I've gotta go to London because she can’t travel–”

  “Why can’t she travel?” Peyton interrupts.

  “She has a child, I don’t know why she won’t come here. I'll ask her that when I see her, but that’s all I know; she can’t come here to New York, so I've gotta go to her: which is fine. I've had to travel for work before, and it won’t be the last time I have to either.”

  “Oh right. Okay, go on,” she waves her hand for me to continue.

  “Yeah, so I accepted that I have to go to London, and then when I was walking to my car; guess who approaches me?”

  “Who?”

  “Lucy.”

  “No!” She gasps. “What did she say?”

  I feel my eyes start to water again, so I dab under my eyes with the tissue I've still got clenched in my hand.

  “She said some shit about how he still loves her, and blah, blah, blah. I told her to fuck off, and that Blake couldn’t stand to see her, that she was a cheating, whore.”