Dark Swan

by Showalter, Gena

  This is going to be as easy as taking candy from . . . anyone.

  Peering into that gorgeous arctic gaze, she hooked her fingers on the hem of her shirt and lifted.

  He stopped breathing altogether. “What are you doing?”

  “What does it look like I’m doing? Getting more comfortable.” She unfastened her bra, tossed the material aside, and shimmied out of her pants so that only her panties remained.

  As she straightened to her full height, shoulders back to properly display her breasts, he took a step toward her. Stopped. Took another step forward.

  At war with his desires? Desires now clouding the bond. Once again, she couldn’t read him.

  “Do you want to touch me?” she asked, cupping her breasts. Her thumbs traced over her puckered nipples. Like the tätoveerimine, they possessed a glittery sheen, and they throbbed oh, so deliciously. “Perhaps I’ll even let you taste me.”

  Agony tightened his features. “Don’t you dare . . . put your clothes back on.”

  Feminine power flooded her—remade her. This man—this beautiful, perfect man—couldn’t get enough of her.

  Not you, the bond.

  Whatever. She rested her hands at the waist of her underwear. “What about these? Should I take them off?”

  “Yes,” he croaked. “Off. Now.”

  Candy. Anyone.

  But beneath her confidence was a yearning she couldn’t deny, and she trembled as she drew the material down her legs. She kicked, the panties soaring. He caught them in a single fluid motion, his gaze never leaving her, but roving over her, as languid as a caress. Where he looked, she tingled and ached worse.

  She traced her fingertips down her stomach, circled her navel, and delved between her legs, a moan parting her lips. A groan parted his. He closed the rest of the distance in seconds, invading her personal space.

  “I was your first kiss.” His voice was part pride, part demand. “I will be your first lover. Your only.”

  The words shook her to the core.

  A handful of orderlies had attempted to start something with her, but she’d never known what was an experiment and what wasn’t, and she’d never wanted to be filmed during an intimate moment.

  And she would have been. Here, the cameras had never ceased to record.

  “But I won’t be your first.” She cringed when she heard the pout in her tone. But how could she not pout? Other women had put their hands and mouths on her property.

  He’s my property now?

  Only doing this for Trinity, remember?

  Scowling, Dallas cupped her shoulders, the skin-to-skin contact electrifying her, desire vibrating inside her veins. He spun her, placing her back against his chest, and said, “Even though you’re only using me, I’m sorry.”

  Heat spread across her cheeks. Both sets. “You don’t need to apologize for having past lovers. You were living your life.”

  “Not sorry that I was with other women. One day, you’ll even thank me for the things I learned. I’m sorry about this.” He pinched her nose and held her mouth closed with one hand while restraining her with the other. “I’d use another sedative on you, but I’m not sure how I’ll react to it.”

  What . . . why . . . bastard!

  She fought him, cursing how easily he’d kept his actions hidden from the bond, but no matter how hard she bucked and clawed, he maintained his hold. A hold he should have softened as he experienced her emotions—or if he’d felt any remorse or guilt. But the only thing he projected at her was cold, hard determination.

  Hope you pass out too, she mentally screamed at him. Then darkness descended, and she knew nothing more.

  7

  Lilica.” Her sister’s voice called to her from the abyss. “Lilica.”

  Lilica blinked open her eyes to find a thick white mist surrounded her. She frowned, confused and a little light-headed, and realized she wore a T-shirt, bra, and pair of panties. More than she’d had on before she’d passed out.

  Passed out . . .

  Dallas! The callous bastard had knocked her out. Then, through the tendrils of mist, she spotted Jade.

  “Jade!” Already on her feet, she glided forward. “Are you hurt?”

  Jade pulled at the collar of her shirt, revealing bruises around her neck. “Walsh tried to choke me out, but I’m healing.”

  As children they’d learned not to touch each other. And even after gaining their freedom, when the rules had no longer applied, they’d kept each other at a distance. But in that moment, Lilica couldn’t stop herself from wrapping the stunning beauty with skin the color of a fern and hair as white as snow in her arms. The sweet scent of sugarplums helped anchor her. Jade’s scent.

  “Where are we?” she asked.

  “This is the spirit world in existence around the natural world. I found you and pulled your spirit from your body.”

  Spirit world? Frowning, Lilica eased back, though she maintained a tight hold on her sister lest the girl float away. “We’re dead?”

  “Not even close. I’ve learned a lot these past few days. A person—whether human or otherworlder—is first and foremost a spirit. A spirit has a soul and lives in a body. Your spirit is your battery, or power source. Your soul is your mind, will, and emotions. And your body is the house that moors you to the natural world. With a little help, your spirit can leave its house for a short period of time. It’s called spirit walking.”

  Fascinating. No telling what Lilica would have done if she’d known about this . . . if she’d been able to move between the realms of the living and the dead, the daydream and the nightmare . . . when the doctors had lived.

  “How did you acquire the ability to spirit-walk?”

  Jade fluffed her hair. “I borrowed the ability from my protector.” Like Trinity, she could steal a life force, even a specific ability. Unlike Trinity, she couldn’t steal a life force or ability in its entirety. She always left pieces behind, and whatever she took always returned to its owner a day or two later. “His name is John. He’s a Rakan.”

  Rakans. Golden ones, they were called, once hunted like the Forførn. Their pelts were made of malleable gold, the purest form this world had ever seen. “If he’s harmed you . . .”

  “No. He’s actually been quite . . . gentle with me. When he can actually bring himself to touch me.” Bitterness seeped from her sister’s voice. “Contact with me literally makes him vomit.”

  Because he considered her a freak? Anger bloomed. “I will murder him.”

  “No. No.” Jade shook her head, white tresses dancing over her shoulders. “He’s built so many internal defenses, I can’t read his thoughts or his future. For the first time in my life, I’m experiencing peace and quiet. I’ll endure anything to stay with him.”

  Well. That, Lilica understood. The way Dallas affected her . . . she hated it, but she kind of loved it too.

  “I’m here because I had to know you’re all right.”

  Jade squeezed her hands. “John told me Walsh found you.”

  “I’m fine, and Walsh is dead.”

  “Truly?”

  She nodded, a sense of pride welling inside her. “Dallas—my protector—killed him.” My protector . . . and my tormentor.

  Next time she wouldn’t give him an opportunity to strike at her. She would not allow him near her until he would do anything, sacrifice anything, to get inside her.

  Dallas . . . inside me . . .

  She shivered, excitement waking up every nerve ending in her body, making her ache from head to toe.

  “I tried to reach out to you,” she said, doing her best to maintain a neutral expression, “but I was drugged and failed. When the drugs wore off, I tried again but failed again.”

  “I wonder if John is somehow stopping all telepathic communications.” Jade pursed her lips. “We’ll worry about that
later. Right now, there’s something I have to tell you.”

  Just then, Lilica was certain she was seeing the Maleahdolla part of her sister’s DNA. Unwavering determination peered at her through eyes of emerald green. “What is it?”

  “I found Trinity. This spirit world . . . I can see the ties between us, tattered though they are, and I followed the one I still have to her.”

  What! After three years without a word from their eldest sister, Jade had found her? Just like that? “Why do you sound upset? This is wonderful news.”

  “No. It’s terrible. She’s not the girl we remember, Lil. She’s changed. She’s . . . darker.” Jade shuddered.

  “I don’t care. She’s still our Trinity.” The girl who’d offered to take a beating for her. Someone as starved for affection as they were. Tormented by a past they couldn’t change. A by-product of the horrendous things they’d all been forced to do. “We can help her.” They had to help her.

  “She doesn’t want to be helped.”

  “You’ve talked to her?”

  Tears welled in Jade’s eyes, spilled down her cheeks, and the sight hurt Lilica on a cellular level. “I pulled her spirit into this place”—she motioned to the mist—“before I pulled yours.”

  Feeling as if she’d just been dipped in acid, Lilica croaked, “Her disease.” Can’t lose them both.

  Can’t lose either one!

  “You can be around her without becoming infected. The disease isn’t airborne or even passed through casual contact.”

  “You’re sure?”

  A confident nod. “I read her mind.”

  Lilica chewed on her bottom lip, a habit she’d only recently developed. “She didn’t want to stay here? Didn’t want to see me?” How needy she sounded. But she didn’t care. Lilica had missed Trinity as intensely as she would miss a limb, had been fighting to save her life, and her eldest sis couldn’t be bothered to say hello?

  Jade’s shoulders hunched. “I’m sorry.”

  Another rejection. This one almost drilled her to her knees. She had to curb the urge to scream up at the skies, to shake her fists in the air. Why does no one want me?

  “Pull her spirit again,” she said. Maybe . . . maybe the disease had affected Trinity’s mind. Maybe it had spoken for her. Maybe she just needed a reminder of Lilica’s love. “Yes? But don’t tell me where you find her.” She could inadvertently reveal the location to Dallas.

  Jade hesitated, clearly uneasy, but ultimately she nodded. “All right. Wait here.” She closed her eyes—and vanished.

  Both eager and overcome by nerves, Lilica paced. If Trinity rejected her to her face, fine. Whatever. She would deal. But she wouldn’t abandon her sister. Nope. Not me. She would continue to fight to give Trinity a better life. Or any life at all. And somehow, some way, she would find a way to cleanse Trinity of the Schön.

  The records at IOT claimed the Schön king had died the instant Trinity stole his life force. Because he had been dependent on the parasite, or because of a reason she couldn’t yet comprehend?

  If the parasite remained separate from Trinity, simply living off her, its dark influence could be cleaved; it could be removed and killed without killing Trinity. In theory. The doctors had left notes in their files and had hypothesized the same. But they hadn’t known how to remove or kill it.

  Had Trinity stuck around the lab, the doctors had planned to force Jade to steal as much of the Schön as possible, and use her as a guinea pig, testing different possible cures on her. If Jade had died when the Schön had died, well, they would have still had Trinity, the star pupil.

  Thanks to Walsh, the doctors had gotten what they’d deserved!

  Jade finally reappeared in the center of the mist, with Trinity at her side.

  Lilica stopped, her knees nearly buckling, her heart swelling with a sudden burst of love. She wanted to rush over, hug and shake her eldest sister . . . but she planted her feet firmly in place.

  Shouldn’t overwhelm her.

  She studied the piece of her heart she hadn’t seen for so long. The fact that all three girls had sprung from the same egg was even less apparent now that they were adults. They differed in every area. Hair, skin, and eye color (unless Lilica mimicked one of them). Height. Even body type.

  Trinity wore a lacy bra and panty set, revealing lush curves meant for seduction. With her blond ringlets, thickly lashed sapphire eyes, and pretty pink cheeks, she was more gorgeous than ever.

  No one would ever look at her and think, Gross! She’s a walking STD!

  The only real difference was her scent. She no longer smelled like honeysuckle. She smelled like . . . nothing. As if the girl Lilica had known no longer existed.

  No! She existed. She could be saved.

  Topping out at five three, Trinity was the kind of woman Dallas considered state-of-the-art. Not just the kind he should want, but the one he had wanted—and perhaps still wanted.

  Just as Lilica knew more about his past than he’d ever told her, she knew how desperately he’d desired Trinity the few times the two had interacted.

  A turbulent storm suddenly rained acid inside Lilica. This wasn’t jealousy she felt. It wasn’t! Probably wasn’t even anger. Surely. Because, if Dallas still desired Trinity, Lilica would have an easier time convincing him to forgo lethal force.

  What Lilica felt . . . was it self-pity? If she slept with him, solidifying their bond, and managed to cleanse Trinity as she hoped, she would be forever bound to a man who preferred her sister. Every minute of every day, she would feel his hunger for Trinity like a thorn in her heart.

  Doesn’t matter. Do what’s best for Trin. “How are you?” Lilica asked, cutting through the silence that hung so thick between them.

  “Not well,” Jade answered. “She was in bed with another human. The second one tonight.”

  “What? There’s nothing wrong with enjoying a bag of mixed nuts.” Trinity wrenched free of Jade’s hold, all the while watching Lilica. “I can feel you judging me with your gaze.”

  “I would never judge you.” Lilica flattened a hand between her breasts. “I know why you do what you do. I love you. I’ve missed you. And I want to help you.”

  Trinity flinched, her shoulders rolling in. “You can’t help me.”

  “I can. I will.” I must.

  “You don’t think I’ve tried to help myself?”

  “We’re stronger together,” she said, and it was true.

  “You don’t understand.” Trinity’s irises appeared as hard as diamonds. “I don’t need you anymore. For months I was trapped inside a realm without time or people. I was alone, and I nearly died. To get home, I had to endure horrors beyond your wildest imaginings. But I’m glad I did. I learned to rely on myself. To stop wishing you’d rush to the rescue.”

  “Whether you want my help or not, you’re going to get it. I will do whatever proves necessary to find a cure and cleanse you.”

  “Maybe we shouldn’t,” Jade said. “Maybe the agents are right. While we are struggling to save her, she’s going to be turning her lovers into killers.”

  Trinity lifted her chin. “Your point?”

  Such disdain for the ones she harmed. This isn’t the girl I used to know.

  Dallas was right, Lilica realized: there was a huge difference between defending yourself and slaying an innocent. That wasn’t judgment but fact.

  “There has to be another way to save you,” Jade insisted.

  “There isn’t.” The corner of Trinity’s mouth lifted in a sneer. “I tried other ways, and I paid dearly for it.”

  Very gently, Lilica said, “Right now, you’re trapped in the middle of a great and terrible storm. But one day, the rain will stop. It must. A garden will grow.”

  “When did Lady Wicked become such a romantic fool?” Trinity turned her scowl to Jade. “Take me back. Now.”


  “No. Not yet.” This wasn’t even close to the happy reunion Lilica had imagined, but she wasn’t giving up. Would never give up. “Why did you stay away from us after you escaped the institute?” The question had been part of her for so long—years!—that it slipped out without permission, her voice drenched in despair. “Why didn’t you come back for us? Why didn’t you communicate with us?”

  Trinity blanched, only to buck up a second later. “You should cry your thanks rather than issuing complaints. I kept you safe.”

  “We were trapped inside IOT.” Jade rubbed the spot over her heart. “Trust me. We weren’t safe.”

  All attitude and zero finesse, Trinity snapped, “If the doctors had gotten hold of me, you would have suffered.” She turned away. “I’d planned to come for you. Eventually. First I had things to do. I still have things to do.”

  “What things?” Lilica asked. “Maybe I can help.”

  “You can’t.” Spine rigid, Trinity added, “You should have left me alone. You should have waited for me to come to you. I don’t want to be with you right now. I don’t want to see you.”

  Being whipped, the skin flayed from her back, would have been easier than hearing those words. And yet, Lilica detected a thread of vulnerability in Trinity’s tone, and it gave her hope. My sister is still in there.

  “Talk to me. Tell me why you don’t want to see us. We’re your family.”

  A pause. A heavy exhalation of breath. “No, Lilica. We haven’t been family for a long time. I’m not sure we ever were.”

  A barbed lump grew in her throat. “No. No!” She stomped her foot. “I don’t believe that, and neither do you. The disease is speaking for you.”

  Trinity pointed a finger in her face. “You don’t know me. You say you want to help me. To cleanse me. But I don’t want to be cleansed. Not anymore! What you call disease, I call power.”

  What! “You’re either joking or fooling yourself. You aren’t empowered. You’re subjugated. Dependent on the harm you do to others.”