Secret Crush (The House of Morgan Book 1)

by Victoria Pinder

"Absolutely."

  "Oh. I didn't make that connection."

  A conversation over dinner about his father was the opposite of fun. Besides, she needed to learn a few things in the here and now. Peter Morgan was the mystery to her—four years her senior, he'd never been home all those years she spent with Victoria. "Is Peter like your father?"

  John brought her to the terrace where people sat with their drinks. The live music drifted in the open air as he answered, "I hope not. He's being kind, but he wants something and he's mentioned the will reading. I don't know how ruthless he is. I might remember wrong, or he might have changed."

  He led them to a corner with black metal tables and chairs and fewer people to wait for their dinner buzzer to go off.

  "What does that mean?"

  He held out her chair and a sigh escaped her lips as she noticed the taper candles near the small vase of flowers. "I don't know, but he wants control of the business empire."

  Everyone knew Peter had spent years in training to take over the House of Morgan. Her brain couldn't quite wrap around that John took off to be a government agent.

  "What do you want?"

  He lifted his finger for the waitress to come to their table as he showed off his cute dimples. "You."

  Did he? Her face heated as she clutched her hands together under the table.

  The waitress came over and John told her, "The Riesling. Alice has always enjoyed sweet."

  She massaged her wrist to stop trembling. He remembered her sweet tooth.

  The waitress left to get the bottle of wine.

  Alice fixed her hair behind her ears, leaning close enough to John to sniff cedar, pine, and subtle gun residue. John was sexy before, but now he upheld the law. His untouchable hotness level skyrocketed. Her skin ached for him. "You avoided the discussion," she said. "I don't understand how a man such as yourself would take a job that doesn't pay nearly as much as you have in your bank accounts."

  He tipped his head and her heart raced.

  "How did you smell the gunpowder? I just bought these clothes."

  "I like the shirt." The change of conversation didn't sway her, but his investigation technique needed work. She didn't feel pressured in the slightest. His broad shoulders could make a trash bag sexy. Her body melted like ice cream on a hot summer day. He'd leave soon, but he could have anything he wanted from her. The waitress came back with the bottle of wine and two glasses.

  Alice waited for him to pour with her hands under her legs. She tried to calm her heartbeat so she'd sound almost normal. "I don't know." He set her glass before her. "You're supposed to smell like cedar and pine trees."

  He stopped mid-sip. "I'm supposed to smell like a tree?"

  "No. No." She shook her head. So much for smooth. She massaged the back of her neck with one hand and picked up her wine glass with the other.

  She gulped some wine, grateful she could swallow. The liquid only made her peek at John again and fall deeper under his spell. Slowly, her temperature grew and her gaze wandered to the hotel door. Air conditioning might help. "It's how I remember you smelled. Reminds me of home, I guess."

  Silence hung in the air, leaving her empty and vulnerable. He sipped his white wine, his gaze unreadable. Coldness seeped through her and sent a shiver down her back. This was the worst moment in her life. "Alice, why do you remember so much about me?"

  Her face heated, which countered the ice in her neck, but her brain didn't quite work. She was light-headed. If she fainted, would the nightmare of this moment end? Not with her luck. I have to tell the truth. She leaned forward. "You were my first kiss."

  Clearly shocked, his mouth fell open. Her breath stuck in her throat. The earth needed to swallow her right now. He placed his drink on a cocktail napkin and her nerves tingled. Then he put his forearms on the table. "What do you mean?"

  There was no escape. No earthquakes appeared to save her. She placed her hands over his. He had to remember that moment as it was burned into her dreams. "It didn't mean anything to you. I knew that then. I accidentally moved my face, and you kissed my lips instead of my cheek. At that time, I didn't know what to do and I opened my mouth."

  His entire face gazed so intensely at her that she lost her ability to think. He had no idea what she was talking about. She ought to go jump in the pool fully clothed and cool off. Granted she'd only been fourteen, but the memory was seared into her mind.

  To avoid him, she gulped a second glass of wine and said nothing. There was nothing else to say. The special moment was destroyed, so she pushed away from the table. "I should probably go back to my room."

  "Wait." He squeezed her hand. "We were at Vizcaya for Vicki's birthday party. I had no idea it meant so much to you."

  She inhaled and scooted closer. He remembered! She took her hand back from him and clutched her necklace. "You remember?"

  He tilted his face so they were inches apart. "You tasted like strawberries."

  At the farm, she always ate strawberry something. He remembered her taste? Her mind was mush. To avert her gaze she turned her head and tried to stop her limbs from shaking. For one second she needed to breathe like a normal person. "We grow them on the farm."

  Without a word, he picked up his drink and studied her. His perusal felt different from other men. There was no way she was worldly enough for a man like John.

  Then a smile that shined like the sun appeared on his face and brought out those dimples as he leaned back in his chair. "I didn't know it was your first kiss. I'd have made it more special."

  Her gaze flew to his, and the gleam in his eye made her feel like she was the only woman on the planet. "That would have been more awkward, and I was already embarrassed."

  The buzzer on the table reverberated. He picked it up and took her elbow. "Don't be embarrassed. I was the luckiest guy that day, and I didn't even realize it."

  If he thought like that, then tonight would end with fireworks and explosions. "Really?"

  "Yeah," he said. "You had just had a fight with your dad or something. Shall we go to dinner?"

  Her hotel room would be quieter. She would have been happy to skip dinner but he seemed intent on a meal. He lifted her to her feet as she scooted back her chair. His hand brushed the base of her spine. This was it. Her body trembled for his hand against her naked body as he escorted her into the dining room.

  "I'm glad I came home," he said.

  They waited for the hostess to show them to a table, and John held her seat for her. She'd told him her feelings and he'd responded. It wasn't her imagination—John was flirting with her. She had to read this right. After the funeral, they'd go their separate ways, but for tonight, she'd be his Cinderella. She traced her throat with her forefinger. "Why?"

  "You." He slid into the seat opposite her.

  A shiver of pleasure overwhelmed her. She lowered her eyes and giggled. Her nerves were getting in the way. She'd never be sophisticated. "The Morgan charm."

  His hand went across the table and brushed against hers. "What?"

  She picked up her drink. More memories played in her mind like a movie as she remembered the House of Morgan and how Vicki went to charm school. She tilted her head. "Did you get lessons in how to be charming?"

  For a second, his face lost all traces of that guard that was so high and jaded. Then his sexy dimples came back and his smile was simple and pure. "No. I just like seeing you blush. Do the boys in the country not compliment you?"

  She slid her drink back on the table and winked at him. "Not like you do."

  Without warning, he scooted his chair closer to hers. "Alice Collins, if you keep looking at me like that, then I'm going to kiss you."

  Yes. Her mouth fell open. He couldn't mean that. It was what she'd always wanted. Her entire body felt light and airy, but despite her dreams, she'd never actually drag John to her bed or anywhere. It wasn't who she was. Despite her claims, she couldn't pretend to be that much of someone else. She averted her gaze. "It's way too soon."

>   He leaned closer, across their seats. Every second disappeared and time went still. Her heart beat wildly. Then his nose brushed hers. "Then turn away."

  She closed her eyes. Fairy tales weren't real and she needed to respect herself in the morning. "I can't."

  His arms circled her waist. Nothing else existed in the world except them. Her body ached for his touch, all over. This was fate. Then his lips met hers. The featherlike brush against hers melted everything. This was heaven. His lips tasted like a fine wine or candy, but a million times more succulent.

  Chapter Six

  John thought Alice's strawberry-scented hair matched the sweetness of her kiss as he pulled away from her mouth and leaned back in his chair.

  He was under some spell and not himself tonight. With her, the world was fresh and clean. He gazed into Alice's light blue eyes and felt like he was in a dream where he was safe, and no one judged him. Though she'd compared him to a tree, Alice gave him a sense of home and belonging.

  There was no other choice but to go slow with her. Her entire body begged him to take her right here and now, but he wouldn't. He ran his hands through his hair and tried to regain his control.

  The music from the terrace wafted into the restaurant. Sitting across from Alice felt like he belonged somewhere. He tried to breathe.

  She fingered her gold pendant, saying something he didn't catch. His gaze returned to her sweet lips as she unfolded her napkin and placed it on her lap. He pictured kissing the parts she hid under her black dress.

  She leaned across the table and kissed him. Without intention, he opened his lips, and tugged her close.

  Steel drums beat in his ear, and he questioned if it was his heartbeat. He let go of her chin as the waitress came over.

  "John, I don't know what to say."

  Whatever had prompted those words would remain a mystery. The tingle of her kiss lingered on his lips. At least she couldn't hear his thoughts. She would run away. He sat back and crossed his arms. "I don't either. Alice, I'm in the middle of changing my entire life."

  She scooted her seat in across from him. The distance of the round table between them was good. "Okay. Don't worry about it." She shrugged. "Tonight is a fantasy."

  Fantasies and Alice were a dangerous combination. Forget dinner. It had been a bad idea to spend time with her. The trouble was, if he went anywhere near her room, he wouldn't let her go. The thought scared him. Alice reminded him of a dream he never had. She was the only thing he'd touched in years that was warm and inviting. "The funeral is on my mind."

  "Of course it is. Despite everything, he was your father and the only parent you had."

  "I don't want my dark thoughts to ruin your night too. Maybe once we finish our meal, I should let you go back to your room."

  She toyed with her water glass, but then her lips puckered. "Don't run away on my account."

  She knew him. Her comments about home earlier hit him in the gut. Alice's kiss made his body soar, and if he took her, then it would be forever. But eternity wasn't a possibility for him. In his everyday life, vengeance ruled him and he held onto too much anger to ruin a girl like her.

  Breaking with the FBI wasn't as simple as handing in his badge and figuring out a financial position. He finished his drink and then said, "It's dangerous for me to involve myself in your life."

  A brush of her hands on his pumped up his adrenaline. "Who said involved? It was just a kiss."

  "A moment ago you were reserved." There was no way for her to know. She didn't understand. He gazed into her light blue eyes as she sipped her wine and then took her hand. "Alice, don't be someone you're not, for me or for anyone. You are too good for me."

  Her eyes watered as she said, "You are being dramatic."

  The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. "Don't brush off how we feel right now. We both know where this leads."

  "Then don't turn this moment into something it doesn't have to be. Just relax."

  Relaxing wasn't going to happen near her. Alice Collins was sexy, and he didn't think she saw that. Back when Vicki was alive he must have been truly self-delusional, or blind. She'd been in front of his face the whole time. One moment with her might be worth a lifetime of possibilities.

  He pulled his hands back to his lap. Tonight, he'd respect her. His sister's memory should mean that Alice was off limits. The heat under his collar grew. Every inch of him craved her. He stood up and offered his hand. "Dance?"

  She blinked in surprise, but then she smiled like he'd picked her off the bleachers for the school dance. He shook off the thought and helped her up—her hand stayed in his. "Okay. I want to be in your arms."

  For the dance only. He kept his lips pressed together.

  With his rapt attention on her, she fixed her hair behind her ears and let him lead. Her body had curves, and her hand fit in his perfectly. He'd claim the life he wanted and when he was settled and secured, he'd keep Alice for a lifetime.

  They found their positions on the dance floor where salsa music wafted in the air. He wrapped his arms around her perfectly shaped body and closed his eyes to breathe in the hint of strawberries. He led her in the dance. "You are one of those women, aren't you?"

  She stumbled and then let him hold her to lead, but this time with a frown. "What are you talking about, those women?"

  He turned her, his fingers aching to bring her closer. The beat was hard, rhythmic. He finally said, "The ones men call ‘Sweetheart.' It's in your eyes."

  The tempo rose and Alice shook her hips in time to the music. Her moves made his body feel weak, but hot. Her open gaze seemed inviting. "What did you say? What's in my eyes?"

  This dance was torture. As her mouth moved, his lips ached to taste her one more time. He swallowed. "How sweet and kind you are and that you have a heart."

  He spun her around and took that second to get himself under control. Goose bumps dotted his skin, and his flesh was hypersensitive. No words came out of his mouth as she twirled back into his arms. He had dated plenty of women—none of them had affected him like this. Alice was his home. The thought hit him hard. It held him in his place.

  The need in his fingers to keep her locked in his arms grew. No more kissing her was allowed for him. As she moved, she came back and rubbed her chin. "I'm trying to figure you out. One minute you kiss me. The next minute you're stiff and not smiling. Does the FBI rip that out of its agents or something?" She tapped his chest.

  This conversation was like a merry-go-round and made him dizzy. With the music, it was hard to follow a train of thought. If she was anyone else, he'd be different, but she shattered his reserve. It took a second to catch that she was referring to his heart. She brushed his face with her fingers as he said, "The FBI leaves me cold."

  Her body pressed against him. "You're far from that."

  "You don't know that." He'd be ruthless, but near Alice, he lost that part of himself.

  Her hips swayed, brushing his groin. Every part of him was primitive and wanted to throw her over his shoulder and take her upstairs to his room. Instead he said, "I don't want to talk about work."

  "Then let's talk about us."

  "Us?" Absolutely not. There was no us or we in this lifetime. His hands trailed up her perfect back, which only sent more heat throughout his body. "You are a more interesting topic. Funny too."

  "What's funny?" Her face ticked like he said the wrong thing.

  The music was in such a rush now that no matter how loud they spoke, it was difficult to hear.

  He grimaced. "Nothing. We can't."

  Her frown told him he disappointed her, though for the moment she said nothing.

  The music picked up into a frenzy as he led her around in a circle. He pressed his lips together as she asked, "What's holding you back?"

  The song ended with a high note. She was perfect, and his lips tingled to kiss her again. Instead he led her off the dance floor, as he'd not torture himself again. The date had to end soon. Night was coming in like a
blanket that made him forget. His body couldn't handle being that close. She took his hand, and adrenaline surged through him. Brakes would help about now. "My family."

  He led her to stand between a wall and the dance floor. Her face lost its brightness as she said, "Your sister liked me."

  He liked her. He glanced at their table. The food wasn't nearly so tempting. Part of him hoped to get over his issues and just take her, but he leaned against the wall. "The House of Morgan is unforgettable."

  "Perhaps it's your father that holds you still." She stayed in his arms as he massaged her shoulders. So close, he could kiss her again. He leaned in and her lips were inches from his, but then she turned her head. Her eyes misted, like she was upset at him. "Let's change topics. Why did you join the FBI?"

  Clearly he was the one with the issue. Every pulse in his body demanded he take her and never let go. He stared into her blue eyes and saw a spark. It might be fear, but it might be desire. Perhaps she should fear him, but his pulse near her was off the chart. He shook his head and tried to get a grip. "To find out the depths my father would go. I know he had something to do with Vicki's death."

  Her face flinched. "Would he kill his own daughter?"

  "If I stood in the way of something, he'd discard me. I'd assume he'd do that to her too."

  "Yet you joined the FBI to hunt down his friends and still he didn't cut you out. Despite how miserable I remember Vicki being with your dad, I have a hard time believing he'd have killed his only daughter."

  She stroked his forearm, offering comfort. "Don't think about him."

  Then she reached out and hugged him. Her body pressed against his, and his hands shook as he restrained himself from holding her too tight. "Deal."

  Alice nodded, and pulled out of their hug. "Vicki was distant and unseen for months before she died. I thought we were going to college together, but she never showed up."

  He tilted his head and took another long look at Alice's beauty. This was a conversation he could have. Her skin had a glow to it that made her stand out. It might be because she seemed to truly care. "She never confided in you why she disappeared?"