Perfectly Able

by Suzannah Daniels

  “Doesn’t everybody?”

  She laughed in disbelief. “No. Most people our age don’t know what they’re gonna eat for supper, much less when they’re gonna complete a triathlon or buy a house.”

  “Well, most people do have some kind of goals. I just write mine on a list and keep them in my wallet, so I can look at them every day.”

  “I would’ve never imagined you as a list-maker.” She took a bite of her hot dog.

  “And why’s that?” I asked as my curiosity piqued.

  She swallowed. “I guess because I would picture a list-maker with a pocket protector and glasses.” Her gaze fell to my bare chest.

  “Now how do you know I don’t own a pocket protector?”

  “Do you?”

  “No.”

  The corners of her mouth tilted up. “There’re some things a girl just knows.” She looked me in the eyes. “So why do you keep a list?”

  “Because a lot of successful people write their goals down and look at them every day.” I tapped my temple with my fingertip. “It keeps you on track by keeping the things that you want to accomplish in your mind.”

  “Ah,” she said, grinning as she took another bite of hot dog.

  “Go ahead. Laugh,” I taunted. She hadn’t been the first woman to make wisecracks about my lists, but I didn’t care.

  “I’m not laughing,” she countered.

  “But you are smiling,” I accused.

  She lowered her gaze to her hot dog. “Yes, but it’s because I’m….”

  “Because you’re what? Amused? Humored?” I watched her, waiting for her response.

  Shyly, she lifted her eyes to mine. “Impressed.”

  Impressed? Hell, now she had me totally off-guard. I was used to my girlfriends thinking it was some kind of an odd quirk, kind of like my acute aversion to liars. And maybe it was, but….

  “I would say that you, Ridge Sutherland, will live life to the fullest. You won’t spend one minute wishing you’d done anything differently because you know what you want, and you’re going for it. That’s impressive.”

  I was flabbergasted. I ran my palm across my chest as I stared at Ava Nottingham. She had just amazed the hell out of me. “Damn, a woman who gets it.”

  A smile broke across her face, reaching the depths of her azure eyes. Looking at me thoughtfully, she asked, “So what else is on your list?”

  “Just the usual stuff. It’s anything that I’m determined to accomplish, any goal or activity, like buying a house. I really do need a real estate agent soon.”

  “Let me know when you’re ready, and I’ll hook you up.”

  I held my hand across the table. “It’s a deal.”

  She slipped her hand in mine, and we shook on it.

  We fell into a comfortable silence, and after we had finished eating, Ava stood up and said, “You’re right. You do have mad grilling skills. I really liked your wienie.” Her face turned bright red, and then she collapsed back down on the bench and facepalmed. “No, I did not just say that,” she whispered to herself.

  I laughed. “Don’t worry. I don’t kiss and tell.”

  She groaned. “I am so embarrassed.”

  “Don’t be.” I shifted the conversation in hopes of easing her discomfort. “I’m already wearing my swimming trunks. Why don’t you put on your bathing suit and go for a swim with me?”

  She froze. “Uh, n-no,” she sputtered. “I need to clean up this mess.”

  “I’ll help you clean up. Then we can go for a swim. You did bring a swimsuit, didn’t you?”

  “I did, but I think I’m just gonna catch up on some reading tonight. Thanks, anyway.”

  I stood and put the condiments back in the plastic bag, while she closed up the remaining hot dog buns.

  “You can go ahead.” She motioned toward the lake. “I’ll get this.”

  “No, it’s okay. I’ll help.”

  “I got it, Ridge. You should go ahead and swim.”

  I watched her, wondering if this was one of those times when a woman just wanted to be left alone. Finally deciding that it must be, I released the bag of condiments. “Okay.”

  When I reached the lake, I waded out waist-deep and dove in, my body gliding along just beneath the surface. I kicked powerfully, propelling myself rapidly.

  I replayed our conversation over in my head, hoping I hadn’t somehow offended Ava. Failing to come up with anything, I decided that it was the fickle ways of women and brushed it from my mind. I had a triathlon to complete, so I swam harder, concentrating on my goal.

  I returned to the cabin a half hour later and found Ava sitting in a chaise lounge on the deck reading a book. Her jean-clad legs were crossed at the ankle, and from the bottom of her tennis shoes, her feet appeared small, at least in comparison to my own.

  “How was your swim?” she asked as I sat at the picnic table.

  “Awesome. How’s your book?”

  “It sucks.”

  “It does?”

  She nodded, her sky-blue eyes peering at me over the top of the book. “The main character’s boyfriend just died.”

  “Ouch. Succumbed to a disease? Injured in a car wreck? Devoured by a man-eating shark?”

  “She killed him.”

  “That’s not good.”

  “Actually, that’s the good part. He was an ass.”

  “Then why did you say it sucked?”

  “Because she got caught.”

  I chuckled, thinking maybe I should thank London for taking the bullets. “Remind me not to piss you off this week.” I scanned the scenery. “There’re way too many places here to dispose of a body.”

  She lowered the book to her lap, shooting me a mischievous grin. “It’s good for a man to feel a little fear.”

  “Should I sleep with my door locked tonight?”

  Her smile widened. “You should sleep with your door locked every night.”

  “I’ll add that to my list.”

  Her laughter tinkled through the late summer air.

  I toweled off my chest and arms, and I could feel her watch me. When I looked at her, she quickly diverted her attention back to her book.

  “So why did you come here this week?” I asked, sliding my body around and sitting down backwards at the picnic table, so that I could towel off my legs.

  “I don’t know. To meditate, I guess. Think about things, about life, about what I want.”

  “Did you just break up with your boyfriend or something?”

  She sat up a little straighter and stared at me. “Why would you say that?”

  “I don’t know. You’re a beautiful girl who’s secluded herself in the middle of nowhere and who’s fantasizing about killing off men.”

  “He wasn’t officially my boyfriend. We had just dated for a while.”

  “Ah,” I said. “Let me guess. He was an ass.”

  “You’re very perceptive.”

  “Not really. Most all girls say that about guys they’ve dated.”

  Her laughter floated through the air again, and I decided I liked the sound of it. “Good point.”

  I flung my towel over the railing to let it dry.

  “So what did he do to you?” I asked. “You need me to kick his ass?”

  She shook her head. “All joking aside, I don’t really like violence.”

  “I could fling marshmallows at him with my slingshot.”

  The corners of her mouth tilted upward. “That could be fun.”

  I grew more serious. “So, what did he do?” I heard myself asking again, wondering why in the hell I cared.

  Chapter 2

  Ava

  I squirmed as a balmy breeze swept across the deck and the trees rustled around us. He looked at me with such intensity that it almost seemed if I told him the truth, he’d hunt down the last guy I dated and either beat the crap out of him or pelt him with marshmallows.

  Of course, there was a third option. He could see things the same way Jack had seen them, whi
ch was why I was terrified that if Ridge knew the truth, he’d clothe that glorious body of his, pack up his belongings, and start walking, never to be heard from again, just like Jack.

  I groaned inwardly. It angered me that I had allowed the last guy I dated to affect me so deeply. Jack wasn’t his real name, but I didn’t even want to think his name, let alone have it pass from my lips. So I decided to give him an appropriate nickname, Jack, a shortened version of jackass. And he was a jackass. In the end, I’d found out the hard way that he didn’t know the first thing about loving a woman. It’d been a painful revelation, and one that was necessary for me to realize that he didn’t deserve me. So if I knew all of that, why did I still allow him to make me feel this way?

  I had been meeting challenges head-on since I was sixteen, giving me five years of practical experience. But I supposed when it came to relationships, a whole new kind of insecurity seeped into my soul. Gone was the cocky, overconfident girl that I had become in all other realms.

  My eyes fell to his magnificently carved body. His biceps flexed as he repositioned his arms, and he was still watching me, waiting on me to tell him what Jack had done.

  “It doesn’t matter. He’s long gone,” I said, shielding my eyes from the sun, so that I could see him more clearly.

  He had a strong jawline, and as he stood before me, I couldn’t deny that I wasn’t immune to his bronzed, muscular body.

  His brown hair was relatively short with streaks of blond, indicative that he’d probably spent a lot of time outdoors this summer.

  “So what do you do?” I asked, hoping to shift the conversation to more pleasant topics.

  “Well, I just graduated from college a few months ago.” He walked toward me, sitting on the side of the chaise lounge, just inches from my feet. My body stiffened and a wave of self-awareness swept over me. I bent my knees slightly, giving him a little more room at the end of the lounger.

  “What was your major?” I asked.

  “Electrical engineering.”

  “So if I needed someone to change the light bulbs in my apartment, you could help me out?”

  He laughed. “Yeah, I think I could handle that.”

  “Good to know.”

  “I was an intern at an engineering firm, and I was fortunate enough to get hired on after I graduated.” He ran his fingers through his hair, which was quickly drying, and the movement caused his muscles to ripple into action.

  “Sounds like you’ve got it together.”

  “Meticulous planning. That’s the key,” he said, turning to look at me.

  “I agree that planning is important. Just make sure you remember to be spontaneous every now and then. We wouldn’t want you to be boring and predictable.”

  He laughed then. “Have no fear, Ava. I may be a bit predictable because once I set a goal, I don’t stop until I’ve accomplished it, but no female has ever accused me of being boring.”

  He stood, his red swim trunks riding low on his hips. My line of vision rested on his well-defined abs. “I’ll be right back,” he said.

  I didn’t respond, just watched the graceful display of muscle and sinew as he moved. As I watched him, I wished things were different. I wished that Jack hadn’t deflated my confidence. Perhaps I was even angry with myself for allowing him to do it. But it didn’t matter. Knowing that I shouldn’t let a guy affect me that way wasn’t enough for me to keep it from happening. That had been part of the reason that I’d wanted to come here alone. I wanted to get over this hump, gain my confidence back, and tackle life, but being here with Ridge all week would keep my insecurities at the forefront of my mind, impeding any progress that I’d hoped to make. I lowered my head into my palms. I needed to dig deep and find a way past this.

  “Are you feeling okay?” he asked as he stepped back onto the deck and shut the door behind him.

  “Yeah. I’m fine,” I replied, lifting my head and pasting a smile on my face. I noticed that he had his phone in his hand. “Did you get a signal?”

  He glanced down at the phone. “No. I just wanted to access my calendar.”

  “Oh. Still planning, I see,” I joked.

  “Yeah. Old habits….”

  He sat back down on the side of the chaise lounge near my feet and punched the keys on his phone. “So do you have any goals, Ava?” he asked, without looking up.

  “You mean other than stringing up my sister and her friends for putting us in this awkward situation?”

  He grinned. “Guess at this point, you’re stuck with me for an entire week.”

  “Guess so,” I agreed. “You’re stuck with me, too. Still doesn’t keep me from plotting ways to torture her.”

  “I know what you mean. Kelsey has aggravated the shit out of me over the years. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about getting even for all of the pranks she’s pulled. Knowing her, she’d just aggravate me that much more. Having one, little sister is bad enough. I can’t imagine having two.”

  “Yeah, sometimes it can be a pain, but we actually get along pretty well, considering.”

  London was definitely going to get an earful from me. Having expected to be totally alone, I hadn’t even brought my makeup. Part of me thought that I shouldn’t care, but what girl wanted to be stranded with a gorgeous guy and no makeup? It certainly didn’t help my confidence level any.

  Even though he had no Internet access, he scrolled through his phone, and it crossed my mind that Ridge was the type of guy who could easily become a workaholic.

  The soft chirping of crickets lulled me, replacing my carefully constructed wall of vigilance with the tempting notion of relaxation. I watched Ridge, who exuded confidence and ease around me, even though he’d never laid eyes on me before today. Envy slithered into my belly as I wished I could be so comfortable around someone of the opposite sex.

  He moved then, his thigh brushing against the tip of my shoe. My body went rigid, my breath frozen in my lungs. I knew I was overreacting, but that didn’t prevent the spasms of panic that shot through my veins. Instinctively, I scooted my feet closer to me, needing more than a mere modicum of distance between us before I could even begin to regain control of my emotions. I breathed in deeply, hoping that I was being inconspicuous. The last thing I needed was for him to stare at me like I was going to have a seizure or something.

  Inwardly, I cursed myself. It was beyond ridiculous that I had allowed Jack to bring me to this point. But no matter how much one side of my brain told me that it was absurd, the other side was telling me that I wasn’t good enough for someone like Ridge, that he would never find me desirable. So yet another internal battle began.

  I took another deep breath, exhaling slowly. Refusing to fall prey to my traitorous brain, I forced myself to rekindle the conversation. “So you’re training for a triathlon?”

  He looked away from his phone, his hazel eyes focusing on my face. I could tell I’d gotten his full attention with a subject that interested him. He shifted on the end of the lounger, facing me. I concentrated on slow, even breathing.

  “Yes,” he said in a smooth, deep voice.

  I watched his pronounced Adam’s apple as he spoke. My gaze traveled lower to his well-defined pectoral muscles, lower still to his washboard abs. He was definitely male, and that made me giddy and nervous all at once.

  “Will this be your first one?” I tamped down the uneasy feelings that prickled along my spine, refusing to succumb to them.

  “Yes. I watched a video online about a competition. It was a triathlon that consisted of a 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile bicycle ride, and a 26.2-mile run that has to be completed in seventeen hours. Can you imagine doing all of that back to back?” His eyes met mine, but I didn’t answer. “So, anyway, in the video, the triathletes are pushing themselves to get across the finish line before time’s up, and as they near it, crowds of people are lined up along the side of the street cheering and holding out their hands. But it was the look on the triathletes’ faces that caught my at
tention. To know that they’d pushed themselves both mentally and physically to the brink of their boundaries and were still triumphant. If I could feel that kind of energy and emotion from a video, imagine what it must be like to be there. Imagine what it must be like to cross the finish line, to hear the crowd cheering you on. As soon as I watched it, I knew that was going on my list. I want to feel what they felt.”

  He grinned. “It sounds kind of cheesy when I say it like that, doesn’t it?”

  I smiled and a little bit of my anxiety melted away with his words. “No,” I whispered, not expecting my voice to sound so strained. I cleared my throat. “I understand exactly what you mean.”

  He looked at me a little surprised. “You do?”

  “I do.”

  “I’m glad somebody does. Most of my friends can’t understand why I’d want to go through such torture.”

  “It is torture.”

  He straightened his back and looked at me hard. “You say that like you’ve done it.”

  Did I? I repeated the last bit of conversation in my head. Crap. I hadn’t intended to say anything. Since when did I let my guard down around a guy for even a moment? I tried to decide how I’d play it off because I knew that beginning a conversation like this would lead to places that I didn’t want to go.

  I couldn’t lie about it now. I’d just have to go with it. “We have something in common, Ridge. I know exactly what you’re talking about because I competed in a triathlon about a year ago.” That was the truth.

  “You’ve already completed a triathlon?” he asked, leaning forward like I’d just gotten a whole lot more interesting.

  “Yes, I completed it.”

  He exhaled loudly. “You just let the air out of my big bag of macho.”

  A smile pranced on my lips as I watched his face deflate and his shoulders slump. Even though I knew he was joking, there was something humorous about such a manly man being shamed by the thoughts of a female completing such a physical contest before him.

  “If it makes you feel any better, I missed the deadline by eleven seconds, although I did complete the course.”