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by Tabatha Vargo


  Until they came for Harley, I would spend our time together teaching her and showing her what it meant to be human. I would show her what it was like before vampires moved in and took over. Through my memories, she would learn what it meant to be truly alive.

  It was the least I could give her since I was the one who was going to be responsible for handing her over and taking away any rights and freedom she had at the moment.

  When sleep finally took me, I went peacefully with a stiff grin on my lips and a plan flickering behind my eyes.

  The next night when I woke, I took my pill and did a sweep of the property and the lands around it before Harley woke. The trees around me shifted in the breeze, but other than the rustle of their leaves there was complete silence. It made me miss the buzz of nature. Sure there were still birds and bugs, but it was as though even they were afraid to make a noise.

  By the time I got back to the cabin, I heard her moving around inside her room. I moved down the hallway, stopping just outside her door and as if she heard me, she quieted.

  “Hey, you okay in there?” I asked, tapping on her bedroom door.

  She paused inside. “I’m fine. Just having a human moment.”

  With her words, my senses slammed into overdrive and the scent of blood reached my nose.

  Without thinking, I broke through the door, stopping just in front of her where she was seated on the bed pulling her shorts up.

  “What the heck, James?” she snapped, tugging at the waistband and shuffling back on the bed.

  “Blood,” I breathed. “I smell blood. Are you hurt?”

  Hunger burned in my throat, the sense was so intoxicating I had to shake my head to keep myself in the moment. I blinked, feeling the redness burn behind my eyes and my fangs popped out against my will.

  Her eyes went wide and she swallowed. “James? Are you okay?”

  I covered my mouth with my palm, my body starting to shake with the desire to feed. “I’m sorry. I can’t help it. You’re bleeding. Why are you bleeding?”

  Then I realized something.

  While I was burning with hunger, it was the worry that she was hurt that was sending me over the edge.

  There was blood near me.

  Fresh blood.

  Which meant she was hurt in some way.

  My senses were on high alert and venom dripped from my fangs ready for the feed, but while my stomach ached with hunger, it was the panic shaking me that took precedence.

  Her cheeks blazed with embarrassment and she looked away. “I’m fine.”

  “Obviously, you’re not fine. Harley, my senses are unlike any human’s. I know when someone’s bleeding.”

  “James, please just drop it. I told you, I’m fine.” Again she avoided eye contact.

  I breathed in deep, my lungs not moving, but my sense of smell so strong I grew dizzy with the scent.

  And then I knew and I understood the humiliation lacing her cheeks.

  As much as I tried to hold on to memories of all things human, even going as far as collecting items to keep the memories, I had forgotten all about how the human body worked.

  Harley had started her monthly cycle.

  I could smell the difference.

  The richness of the blood.

  The age of it.

  Backing away from the bed, the gentleman in me stepped forward, and I cleared my throat.

  “Pardon me. I forgot that ladies…” I stopped, suddenly feeling embarrassed myself.

  Harley was all woman and the sickness in me reared its ugly head. I couldn’t explain it, but knowing her female reproductive systems were all in working order did something to me. The thought of her sex living and throbbing—the warmth of it—the idea of it wrapped around me.

  I felt myself go hard inside my pants and it disgusted me.

  “You should eat,” I said, sensing the low iron levels in her blood.

  She nodded. “I should.”

  Backing away from her, I left the room. Going to the kitchen, I set out an open can of peaches and filled a glass with water. Once I was done with that and I was sure the place was secure, I left.

  I needed to run.

  I needed to move.

  Things were all wrong.

  I was a predator.

  She was my prey.

  And yet, I was starting to no longer see her that way. Actually, it had been happening slowly over time.

  Harley was never supposed to be mine to keep. She was found and captured for the survival of the vampires, but that didn’t keep the thoughts out of my head. And all I could think about was how badly I wanted to keep her and make her mine.

  We were trapped in a small cabin together, which meant there wasn’t much space between us, but I would have to make it so. It was time I pulled away from Harley. It was time I remembered my purpose. Getting close to her wasn’t helping out the cause. If anything, it was hindering it.

  Sure I wanted to teach her new things and enjoy the expression of wonder on her face. I’d spent most of the night before in bed planning things, but even I had my weaknesses. I couldn’t focus on those things with her walking around in a constant state of bleeding; reminding me she had a woman’s body. A woman’s body that could give me more pleasure than I could have ever possibly known in my lifetime.

  I stayed away most of the night, telling myself it was so I wasn’t tempted by her menstrual blood, but the truth was while her blood was extremely tempting, it was her body that I was having issues keeping myself away from.

  Then as if the God I once worshipped was punishing me, I began feeling weakness the following night.

  I didn’t understand it at first. I almost didn’t recognize the feeling for what it was, since I hadn’t felt weakness since before I was turned, but when I tried to rise from my chair and I felt as though my arms and legs weighed more, I knew that’s exactly what it was.

  I tried not to think about it. Instead, I stood, stretching my tall body, and continued on with my night as usual. I continued to take my Hematonin, staying away from Harley the best I could while I kept myself occupied, which was difficult considering we were in the middle of the woods.

  I found things to do though.

  I read books.

  I took walks.

  It was relaxing and yet, every time I woke for the night I could feel myself slowly going downhill.

  The weakness was followed by nausea.

  The nausea was followed by paleness and at times a bit of confusion.

  Then one night after waking I had a small seizure and I knew.

  I didn’t want to admit it to myself since the situation seemed so far away from me, but the thing I had been dreading for many years was beginning to happen.

  I was becoming immune to Hematonin, and if it was the same as it was with everyone else who became immune, my days were numbered if I didn’t feed. I had three months at the most, although most didn’t make it one.

  Rhys needed to call soon and collect the girl, otherwise, I was either going to lose myself and feed until she was dead or I was going to die. Either way, the situation was grim for Harley.

  5

  HARLEY

  Over the next week, listening to music became my second favorite luxury. There were many records in the cabinet beneath the television, but the soothing sounds of Elvis Presley were the ones I played on repeat.

  My love for Elvis could have also stemmed from the dance between James and myself.

  His patience as he showed me the steps.

  His strength as he led me around the small room.

  The feel of his cold hands—one in my own hand—and the other on my hip.

  It was all so intoxicating.

  When I closed my eyes, I could still see the little grin he had given me while we danced. But that grin had turned into a perpetual frown since then. In the days after that first dance, he hadn’t asked me to dance again. If anything, he had pulled away completely, leaving me to my own devices in a place that was unfa
miliar to me and yet more comfortable than any other place I had spent my time.

  He was going out of his way to make sure there was no contact between the two of us and it was upsetting in a way. Instead of sitting with me when I ate my meals, he left me at the table alone while he stepped outside to search or check the grounds around the cabin. When I lounged on the couch while listening to the music under the cabinet, he would hide in his room while he read a book. The loss of our time together left me feeling even lonelier than I was before he found me and took me in.

  I refused to let him know how he was affecting me. No matter how badly I wanted to ask him to stay and spend time with me, I was too proud. Also, it burned me inside to admit to myself, much less anyone else, that I longed to be in the company of a vampire. It felt wrong considering everything that had happened to the human race since the vampires took over.

  So instead of speaking my mind or asking for the things I wanted, I sat alone in my room, hoping that James would give me the attention I needed and wanted. In a way, my longing was embarrassing, but I consoled myself with the idea that the only reason I had gotten comfortable with his presence was because I had been alone for so long. It was the only thing that made sense. It had to be the reason I craved his company so much.

  I stared at my bedroom door, my curiosity getting the best of me as I wondered what he was doing on the other side. I hoped he was curious about what I was doing in my room.

  Who was I kidding?

  I just hoped he thought about me the way I thought about him.

  Finally, my boredom got the best of me and I found myself picking through the drawers of the dressers and searching the closet. I dug out boxes of clothing and blankets and was thrilled to find a box of women’s clothing that seemed close to my size.

  I hadn’t worn a dress since my mother was alive, opting instead for pants since they kept my legs warm on the occasional cool Georgia night. The fact was, women’s clothing hadn’t been useful when I was out surviving, but I had always worn things that fit my size. James’s clothes swallowed me, sometimes making it difficult to move around without getting my clothes stuck in doors or cabinets.

  Pulling the clothes out of the box, my eyes settled on a pretty blue fabric. I tugged it from under the rest of the fabrics and found that it was a dress. I stood, stripping my clothes from my body and pulling the dress over my head.

  It fit perfectly so I kept it on and packed the other items that would fit into the drawers so I could reach them easier.

  After that, I went back to plundering in the closet, finding small boxes full of things I didn’t recognize until I came upon a white box full of packets that looked like small packages of food. Setting that box on the edge of my bed, I took my time stacking everything back into the closet neatly.

  Then I was left with nothing else to do and the silence of the night outside my blocked window was making me hear things that weren’t there.

  I was about to snap.

  After days of James’s politeness and his absence, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had thought that by staying in my room I was punishing him, but really I was only punishing myself.

  Either way, I was ready to climb the walls and I needed out of the room.

  No.

  I needed out of the house.

  Besides, I wanted to ask James about the items I found in the closet.

  Moving away from the window, I walked over to the bed I made after waking when the sun went down. James had taken the time to show me how to make a bed. It was a silly thing to worry about, but it somehow made me feel even more alive. I spent the first hour after waking making and unmaking the bed.

  Picking up the box full of small packets, I held it against my chest with one arm and moved to the bedroom door. With a deep breath, I stopped before opening the door. Turning, I found my reflection in the mirror over the dresser. All the furniture in the house was something James called antique, which meant it was extremely old and mostly outdated, but I loved it.

  I took myself in, my eyes scanning my hair, which was black as ever, as it hung loosely over my shoulders. It was clean and brushed and somehow I felt pretty looking at it.

  I smoothed my palm down my stomach and over the blue dress. Like everything else in the cabin, it too was probably considered old and out of style, but I had never seen anything prettier. It was the color of the sky in the middle of the day and since I missed the daylight, it felt refreshing to wear it.

  The bottom, the sleeves, and the center where the buttons were located were trimmed in white lace. The row of buttons holding the dress together was tiny pearls. I liked the way it made me look. I felt pretty, and I hoped that when James saw me he would think so, as well.

  Turning, I opened the door, stepped into the hallway, and shut the bedroom door. I closed my eyes, took another deep breath, and then took it one step at a time. James was in the kitchen, staring out the open back door and into the dark night. When I stepped into the room he turned toward me.

  He didn’t seem surprised to see me out and about, but once his attention lowered to the dress I was wearing his eyes widened a bit.

  “I hope you slept well,” he said, turning his eyes away from me almost too quickly.

  “I did. Thank you.” I moved deeper into the room, feeling the night air touch my calves. “I couldn’t stay in that room any longer.”

  He nodded. “I’m glad,” he said, surprising me. “What’s that?” He pointed toward the box in my hand.

  Seeing him standing in the doorway, looking handsome and alone, I had completely forgotten about the box in my hand.

  “I found some things in my closet.”

  His eyes dipped over the dress before settling on my face once again. “I can see that.”

  It was frustrating that he didn’t comment further on the dress and the way I looked.

  What was he thinking?

  Did he hate it?

  Did he like it?

  “Well, I found this in there.” I moved to the small round table in the kitchen and set it down on top, removing the lid. “These were in it, but I don’t know what they are.”

  Reaching in, I pulled out a few packets and held them up for him.

  He moved to stand next to me and pulled out one of the packets.

  “I didn’t know there was anything in that closet. I thought I cleared it out. Either way, nice find because they’re seeds.”

  I gasped. “Seeds? Like for flowers or fruits and vegetables?”

  The thought of fresh fruits and vegetables made my stomach grumble loudly with hunger.

  He looked at me confused. “Yes. It says so right here.” His thumb moved across a set of letters.

  I had figured those letters formed a word, but unfortunately, I didn’t know how to read.

  I dropped my head, letting my hair cover my blazing embarrassed cheeks.

  “You can’t read?” he asked, even though I was sure he knew the answer.

  I shook my head.

  He didn’t say anything as he dug through the box, putting the packets into two piles.

  “These are vegetables and fruits.” He pointed to one pile and then the other. “And these are flowers.”

  “There’s so many of them.” I moved my fingers over the packets.

  “There are. Whoever purchased these seeds planned on planting a large garden.”

  A garden sounded lovely.

  Watching my food grow and plucking fresh fruits and vegetables from their source before biting into them; it sounded like heaven. I had picked fruits and vegetables many times in overgrown fields and the occasional garden, but rarely had they been fresh. Most were beginning to rot, but I had no problem cutting off the bad parts and eating anything that was leftover.

  “I’ve seen gardens before. The best one belonged to Mr. Derry. He owned a farm and he allowed my family to seek shelter there for a week. It wasn’t a big garden, but it grew strawberries and he promised to give me some, but we had to flee before they
were ripe.”

  “I’m sorry, Harley,” he whispered.

  I waved away his apology.

  It wasn’t like he was the one who hunted us.

  At least I didn’t think he was.

  “Are there any strawberries in here?” I asked, looking up at him full of hope.

  He stared at me, not looking at the pile, but his hand found the packet and he lifted it up to show me.

  I took it, looking at the cover and asked, “Will you help me plant them? All of them?” I looked up at him, my eyes moving across his sad expression. “Please?”

  I had no idea how long we were going to be at the cabin, and I was sure I would never get the chance to see the things grow, but I didn’t care. Even if I didn’t get to taste the freshness of the fruits and vegetables, I could only hope another survivor would find the garden and be able to enjoy its produce.

  “Yes. I’ll help you.” Again his eyes moved over my face, pausing at my eyes and holding them hostage in his gaze.

  Without looking away, I smiled up at him. “Thank you, James.”

  And I meant it.

  I was so grateful for everything.

  He was quiet and reserved, but he had helped me so much already. He had given me more in the short amount of time since he had first taken me in than I had ever had in my entire life.

  The security.

  The comfort.

  And I supposed a bit of companionship and friendship.

  Not to mention, the warm feelings I couldn’t quite explain that spread through me whenever he was near.

  The idea of spending time with him outside and planting something that would have a future left me feeling strange. I didn’t hate it. There may never be a future for James and me, but the things we left behind in the Earth would blossom. Somehow that was enough for me at that moment.

  My heart was pounding and my fingers shook. It occurred to me that it was the first time my heart was beating quickly with excitement and not fear. I wasn’t worried about what was going to happen. I was looking forward to it. Being with James was making me happy, and as much as I tried to fight it, I couldn’t anymore.

 

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