Hidden Desire

by Amy Patrick

  Hakon’s eyes narrow speculatively. He’s clearly wondering if he should trust me. Why would he? As far as he can see, I’m another one of Audun’s loyal soldiers. We both know any disloyalty among the ranks is dealt with swiftly and severely. And hell, as far as I know, he’s my father’s biggest fan. But... there’s something about him.

  Maybe it’s the circles under his eyes, or the dispirited way he goes about his job, or that melancholy look he gave to the father-and-son pair that makes me think he wouldn't be here if he had any choice about it. Just like me.

  “I won’t bore you with my life story,” he says with a tight smile. “We’re already exhausted as it is.”

  “And starved,” I say. “Ah, right on time. Thank you love.”

  The waitress sets both our plates in front of us, warning us that they’re hot. We both dig in. After a few minutes, Hakon comes up for air.

  “So what do you think about the operation based on what you’ve seen so far?”

  Is this a test? Is he now fishing to find out if I’m all-in on my father’s scheme?

  I give him a safe answer. “It all looks like it’s proceeding according to plan, as far as I can tell. You’re the expert, though. What do you think?”

  “Oh, it’ll work. I have no doubt of that. This latest incarnation of S is the most addictive substance I’ve ever seen—that the world has ever seen.”

  “What I don’t get is... it’s made of something that’s found readily in the Light Court. And yet, Altum’s not full of S addicts. But Father warned our people to stay away from it. Why does it affect us—and the humans—but not the Light Elves?”

  He takes another bite, chewing slowly before answering. “I have my theories.”

  “Such as?”

  “Have you ever encountered pure iron?”

  I have an immediate flashback to my painful attempt to cross the property line of the McCord’s farm. “Yeah. Once, actually. It wasn’t pleasant.”

  “Right. For centuries Dark Elves have avoided iron because it’s poisonous to us. We don’t have it in our homes, we steer clear of locations filled with iron, we make sure our children don't get hold of chewable vitamins containing iron. But at the most recent Assemblage I learned something from Wickthorne. The Light Elves have taken the opposite approach.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “They purposely expose their children, starting in infancy, to small amounts of iron. They sometimes cook in iron skillets, wearing gloves of course, so trace amounts of the substance leach into the food.”

  “They’ve inoculated their population against iron poisoning.”

  “Yes,” he says, growing more animated. “And I believe it goes further than that. I think the iron counteracts the active ingredient in S—the thing that makes it addictive. Earlier iterations of the drug contained much higher iron levels—that was the initial reason Audun cautioned members of the Dark Court not to use it. Some of the first chemists who were assigned to make it actually died. As we’ve perfected the formula, though, we’ve nearly eliminated the iron content. It’s safer for our people to work with, and the addictiveness of the drug has increased exponentially.”

  “So now Dark Elves could become addicted to it.”

  “Yes, it would no longer poison them, but it will hook them if they’re foolish enough to try it. And the humans... they truly have no chance.”

  “Sounds like you’ve created the perfect weapon.”

  His tone and expression flatten out into an unreadable blandness. “Yes. I have.”

  * * *

  The next morning when Hakon and I meet in the lobby of our hotel, I take a risk and propose a change to our itinerary.

  “I know we planned to fly from Charlotte to Memphis to Chicago today—what do you think about mixing it up and visiting the new Memphis plant last, spend the night there instead?”

  He shrugs. “Sure. Why? No love for Chicago?”

  “Oh it’s not that—great city, Chicago. It’s just that I’ve only briefly visited the South, and my last trip to Memphis consisted of only the airport and a quick drive-by. I thought I might take a day and explore, eat barbecue, listen to the blues.” And pay a visit to my co-conspirators to share my new discoveries with them.

  “Your father doesn't have an exact schedule for us as long as we get all the inspections done. So I suppose it should be fine. We even have a few days to burn if you want to take more than one.”

  Ah ha. He’s all too willing to agree to this detour. Maybe he sees it as an opportunity to visit someone in the area that he doesn't see often? I give him another chance to own up to it.

  “Have you spent much time in the region?”

  Hakon shoots me a side glance, brimming with suspicion. “I’ve been there a few times. It seems nice enough, though I mostly just get in and out.”

  “Good then. Maybe you’ll enjoy spending a little more time there yourself.”

  He gives a noncommittal nod as we climb into the taxi bound for the private air field. The day drags, partially because of my eagerness to get to Memphis, rent a car, and make the hour drive south to Altum tonight. And partially because as we fly over Georgia, and South Carolina, and later over Kentucky, Indiana, and Illinois, I can’t keep from thinking of Laney. Is she down there somewhere, perhaps hearing my plane pass overhead?

  I picture that pretty, stubborn chin of hers, tilting to the sky. Maybe she’s enjoying a day at the park, or perhaps lying by the pool, feeling the spring sun soak into her skin. Maybe she’s gotten a service dog, and they’re out for a walk together.

  Maybe she’s thinking of me, too.

  No. Don’t go there. I shut down the highway of emotion running full and fierce from my brain to my heart. It’s pointless to torture myself like this. I need to let go of the myriad mental images I have stored up of her. The best I can hope for is that the trip I take tonight to Altum will result in a cleaner and safer world for her and the children she’ll have someday—with whatever guy is lucky enough to be chosen by her.

  Aargh. No. Stop thinking about it.

  I open the plane’s mini-bar, grabbing the first small bottle I see, downing it in one go.

  “You might want to tap the breaks on that,” Hakon advises as I reach for another bottle. “We’ll be touching down in Memphis in about half an hour. Unless you’re planning to take a cab.”

  I lean back, leaving the other bottles where they are. “No. I’m going to rent a car. Maybe you should, too. Some pretty country around there.”

  We’re so close to Deep River—surely he’ll want to take the opportunity to visit Asher—if my suspicions are correct, that is. I’ll follow his rental car, and if it heads for a certain small Mississippi town south of the Tennessee border, I’ll have my answer.

  He stares out the window at the ground far below. “No, I... I think I’ll just stay on the plane. I didn’t sleep well last night, and I have research to catch up on anyway.”

  “You sure? Seems like a shame to be in the area and not explore all the possibilities.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure.” He turns to me with a sad smile. “At your age the world is still full of possibilities. Old men like me have already had ours... and used them up.”

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Game Plan

  Tromping through the steamy, sticky Mississippi woods, I wonder what the hell I’m doing here. Maybe I have a death wish? If the helicopter-sized mosquitos don’t take me out, the guards at Altum probably will. I did stop at a gas station on the way and use a pay phone to call Ava to warn her I’d be coming. She assured me she’d go and smooth the way and prepare Lad and his bond-mate for my arrival.

  The Light King really shouldn’t worry. I only plan to stick around long enough to share what I’ve discovered about the S plants and the information about the iron content. Hopefully it’ll be enough to help them—and to make up in some small way for the wrongs I did him and Ryann.

  My “escorts” appear when I get within a half mile of
the underground kingdom. One of the fierce-looking leather-clad men grabs the manila envelope from me and inspects it thoroughly as if the sheafs of paper inside might serve as some sort of assassination tools.

  No, really, go right ahead, I say. It’s not like I’ve got top-secret information for your king in there.

  If you do, you’re a traitor, he replies. If not, you’re a liar.

  Either way, so flattering. The hospitality of the Light Court lives up to its sparkling reputation. What’s next? A bed of nails? Truth serum? Lead on, then. I haven’t got all day to be insulted in the woods.

  Without even cracking a smile, the man grabs my arm and jerks me along with him and his still-silent companion. True to her word, Ava waits for me inside, at the bottom of the winding entrance tunnel. She looks beautiful, of course, and happier than I’ve ever seen her.

  “Well, hello—”

  “Culley!” She launches herself at me and throws her arms around my neck. “I knew you would come around. I knew you had it in you all along.”

  I stagger backward, partly from her unexpected strength, but mostly from shock. “Yes, it’s er... good to see you, too.” Peeling her from my chest, I glance to the side to see Asher. He looks more amused than perturbed, so I lift a hand in wary greeting. “Asher.”

  He really looks like he’s striving to keep a straight face. “Culley. How was your trip?”

  “Long. But enlightening.” Now that I see him face to face again, I’m even more convinced he’s related to Hakon. The dimples are the same, and the eyes contain the exact same rare shade of blue-green.

  “Can’t wait to hear all about it. Come on,” he says, taking Ava’s hand and gesturing for me to precede them. “Lad and Ryann are waiting in the palace. Does your father know you’re here?”

  I give him the don’t-be-an-idiot look. “Of course not. Does your father know you’re here?”

  “Culley!” Ava shoots me an offended glare. “How mean.”

  “I’m not sure where my father is, actually,” Asher responds in a measured tone. “I haven’t seen him lately, though I’d like to. I have a lot I’d like to ask him.”

  I open my mouth to say something then think better of it and stay silent for the rest of the walk to the royal residence. I’m still not sure about Hakon. It’s possible I’m making too much of the resemblance. After all, he did say he’s never married or had children.

  And part of me—an ugly part, admittedly—resents the idea that Hakon could be Asher’s father. Hakon is a good man—a truly good man. And Asher’s already won the girl away from me. If he ends up with a loving, kind father as well, while the best I can ever hope for is Audun Rune’s conditional approval and a lifetime without Laney, well... let’s just say I’m not there yet in my emotional growth. Co-conspirator? Yes. But a selfless do-gooder I am not.

  Reaching the palace, we wind through hallways until we arrive in an office sort of room where Lad and Ryann are waiting. Both get to their feet, and Ryann gives me a friendly greeting. Lad regards me with a wary look, but his words are civil enough.

  “Welcome Culley Rune. I understand it’s your intention to help us by sharing some information?”

  Though he’s younger than I am, I sort of feel the need to approach Lad with reverence. He seems... well, kingly. Maybe it’s the leadership glamour or the fact that I know now all he’s been through and sacrificed for his people—and for the girl he loves.

  “Yes. I’ve come to believe it’s best for everyone if we stop the S Scourge,” I explain. “I’ve been to the plants where it’s being made, and I believe I’ve discovered something that could be a real breakthrough.”

  “How do we know you’re not feeding us false information? We can’t even trust what you say mind-to-mind as Ava has informed us your glamour allows you to lie that way.”

  My feet shift, restless, and I clear my throat. “Only to my father, actually. I think it’s unconnected to my glamour, which as you know is related to appearance. But perhaps our shared DNA allows me some immunity to my father’s glamour. I know when he’s lying to me. And I am able to lie to him without his detecting it.”

  Lad looks around the room at his allies, no doubt seeking their input. He clearly has little faith in me, and how can I blame him?

  “I’m reading his emotions, and there’s no intent to deceive right now,” Ryann says. “I think we can trust him.”

  Asher shrugs. “I’m not sure what other choice we have.”

  “I believe him,” Ava says. She turns her attention back to me. “So then you didn’t sabotage the tea company.”

  I shake my head. “No. It wasn’t me. It had to have been another of Father’s agents. I was... very angry with you when I said that.”

  “I understand.” She nods and glances quickly over to Asher, no doubt remembering the emotional scene we all shared a few months ago.

  Lad nods, decided. “Very well then. What have you learned?”

  “For one thing, I’ve brought you all the layouts and delivery schedules from all the S production locations.” There are wide eyes and looks of approval all around as I continue. “And—there may be a way to alter the drug to spoil its addictive properties.”

  “How?” Ryann asks.

  “My father’s healer, who’s been supervising the medical research aspect of S production, told me the addictive properties of the drug increased as its iron content was reduced. If we can find a way to add iron back into the supply, maybe it’ll cause the humans to start detoxing and then overcome their dependence on it. Maybe if we add enough iron, it’ll stop being addictive altogether. And iron isn't something that will hurt humans.”

  “True. Good idea.” Lad’s face twists in concentration as he examines the contents of the folder I brought. “Of course, there is a large, highly addictive supply that’s been manufactured already. But with these delivery routes and times you’ve brought us, perhaps we can ambush the delivery vehicles and remove that supply before it reaches the distributors. I can contact the Light Elven clans who are nearest each of the plants and tell them to start scouting out the routes for locations that pass through wooded areas, or at least unpopulated stretches of road where they can attack.”

  “That could work,” I say. “You’d have to coordinate a simultaneous strike, so Audun would have no time to circle the wagons and set up security. He’ll be furious, but a one-day strike that wipes out the existing supply will definitely not stop him. He’ll order round the clock production to make up for the lost supply. That’s when I’ll add the iron boost to the production process.”

  Ava steps forward wearing a worried frown. “That sounds dangerous, Culley.”

  I let out a short laugh. “This is dangerous—just my being here and telling you this. But I’m through living my life in fear of my father—or standing idly by while he continues to hurt people.”

  Ava shoots Lad a look that says See? I told you.

  “What about this healer?” Asher speaks up for the first time. “If he’s involved in the production process, won’t he detect what’s going on and blow the whistle?”

  I study him, noticing the shape of his nose. It’s exactly like Hakon’s. “Let me deal with him,” I say. “It’s possible he’s not fully on board with Audun’s plan. He seems somewhat sympathetic toward the human race.”

  Ryann nods. “That would make sense. I think it comes along with the profession. I remember Wickthorne taking care of me when I first arrived here, back when I was considered an enemy to the Light Court just because I was human.”

  “It’ll be risky, but I may have to share my intentions with him,” I say. “Either that or do something to take him out of commission if he finds out.”

  “I don’t want you to hurt anyone,” Lad says.

  “I wasn’t intending to hurt him. If I’m wrong and he is fully on board with Audun’s scheme, I’ll have to overcome him and I don’t know... hide him away somewhere until we’ve succeeded. Maybe I’ll bring him here.”

>   Lad nods. “That would work. All right. I need some time to look this stuff over and consult with my soldiers. Then I’ll set about contacting the other clans and secure their cooperation to take out the supply chain. Thank you Culley. I’ll see you later. Ava, Asher—would you walk him out and show him his quarters for the night?”

  As we exit the office I laugh and slide a glance over to my escorts. “I’ll bet those ‘quarters’ come with a pair of guards. He still doesn’t trust me completely, does he?”

  Ava grins. “Not completely. You did knock him out with a copper bowl.”

  We walk together until we’re outside the royal residence and on the path toward the family housing in Altum. Asher must have said something to Ava mind to mind because she says, “Okay sweetie, I’ll see you up there.”

  Before he goes, Asher looks right at me, his distinctive eyes holding, not trust, but perhaps a bit of liking. “I’m not sure why you’re doing this, but thanks man—for the sake of my mom and granddaddy and all the humans.” He gives me a tight smile and steps away, walking toward the surface tunnel.

  “So,” Ava says as we resume our stroll. “Why are you doing this? It’s her, isn’t it?”

  I don’t look at her and don’t answer, keeping my face forward and a tight grip on my heart, which is now thudding painfully. God, what a mess I am. Just the mention of her—not even her name—and I’m back in full-blown pining mode.

  “Well, whatever your reason, I’m happy. You’re doing the right thing by getting away from your father and helping the humans. And now... it’s time to fix your personal life.”

  I snort a laugh. “I have no personal life.”

  “What about Laney?”

  There it is, the white-hot lance of pain through my chest.

  “She’s gone, moved on. It’s no big deal.”

  “It is a big deal. You cared for her. Brenna says you’ve been moping around like a kid who’s been told he can never eat candy again. Why didn’t you go after Laney when she left?”

  I give her the kind of hateful glare reserved for use between siblings. “Since you and Brenna seem to share everything, I’m surprised you don’t know already. I have no idea where she is. So even if I wanted to pursue her—which I don’t—I wouldn’t know where to begin. She’s better off far away from me. I’m bad for her. One good deed doesn’t suddenly make me a saint, you know. ”