Controlled Burn (Scarred Hearts)

by Nikki Duncan

  “I’m already tempted.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Delancey didn’t mind his scars, was familiar with his required therapy and understood losing someone to a fire, but through everything she’d faced she had something he didn’t. Friends.

  She was sharing her friends, but they were hers, not his. They’d been loyal to her before the accident and they only knew part of her story. Logan’s story, thanks to Tony Barrows, was public knowledge. He’d lost the last person he loved and been left with the scarred, daily reminder.

  “Andy’s in the game room,” Lexi said. “Get your drinks and join.” She paused at the doorway and tapped the dark-stained frame that contrasted light gray, almost silver, walls. “Logan.”

  “Yeah?”

  The regular speed of Lexi’s syllables crashing into each other slowed. The perky cheerleader became sincere. “Try to relax and have fun.”

  Logan almost smiled, but his face still hurt from laughing with Delancey so he resisted. “Thanks.”

  “And I hope you’re ready to have your ass kicked because I’m the gaming queen.”

  “I don’t see a crown,” he retorted.

  “I dressed down tonight so I left it at home.” With a flip of her red hair Lexi sashayed out of the room. The already-bright kitchen dimmed a little in the absence of her happiness.

  “She likes to leave before she can lose the last word. It makes her feel like the smartest person in the room,” Delancey said as she moved to a cabinet beside the side-by-side, stainless steel fridge. “Or at the very least the wittiest. You want water or something stronger?”

  “Both.”

  “Ooh. A double fister.” Pulling a glass out, she asked, “What do you want in the second fist?”

  You. In both. “What have you got?”

  “The one thing I agree with my mother on is how to stock a bar.” Delancey slid a stained glass panel back into the wall beside the cabinet and revealed an assortment of liquors and mixers. “Name it and I can probably satisfy the thirst.”

  His mind went blank of every drink he’d ever liked. The only thirst in his brain was for her. He’d agreed to meet her friends for the sake of a distraction and to prolong his time with her. Now he preferred them gone so he could be alone with her again. Friendship didn’t top the list of things he wanted to explore and he wasn’t so sure about taking things slowly.

  “Logan? What do you like?”

  “Whiskey and Coke.” It wasn’t the first answer to enter his mind, but it was the safe one. He needed to play it safe.

  With a nod she reached for the whiskey. “There are water bottles in the fridge.”

  He opened the left door and then the right for the water. Considering the organized, showroom quality of her kitchen, it stood to reason that her fridge would be neatly stocked with fresh fruits and veggies and organic meat.

  The drawers were full of fruit, but the rest of the space was taken up by storage containers with dates and dish names written on the end facing out. The oldest item was seven days old. Most were four to five and it all looked home-cooked.

  “Do you cook your meals a week in advance?”

  “Sort of.” She handed him his drink and closed the fridge. With a nod she led him out of the kitchen.

  He followed her down the hall, watching her the entire way to see what else he could learn about her.

  “I’ve become the unofficial cook for the station when I’m on duty. I test new recipes at home before going to work.”

  “What’s your best dish?”

  “Depends on who you ask.” She turned a corner into what had to be the game room. Or the dining room that had been converted.

  “Ask what?” the man who had to be Andy asked, jumping into the conversation.

  “What my best dish is.” Delancey pointed at Andy and made an official introduction.

  “If Gidget’s cooking, it doesn’t matter. It’s all amazing.” Andy looked at Logan’s scars, but he didn’t stare or make a comment about them.

  Logan relaxed a little. “Gidget?”

  “Family nickname she earned on a surfboard one summer,” Andy said with a wink at Delancey. “You going to be her Moondoggie?”

  “Don’t start that again,” Delancey warned. “Ignore him, Logan.”

  “Wondering if I want to. I kind of like the idea of you on a surfboard.”

  “I doubt you’re seeing past the two piece suit, but you should see her hair in pigtails,” Lexi joked. “Talk about sexy.”

  Rather than focus on an image that would land him in trouble, Logan took the conversation back to a safer path. “What’s the biggest hit at the station house when she cooks?”

  “Her chili burgers,” Andy said. “You should steal from her food stash before you leave so you don’t miss anything.” With a point to the game room, Andy asked, “What’s your poison?”

  “Remember my warning,” Lexi said from her perch on a barstool.

  The walls and trim were the same color as in the kitchen and hall, but that’s where the showroom quality ended. Unless the showroom was for games.

  A pool table and foosball table took up most of the middle of the room. Two round bar tables with chairs sat in opposite corners. A flat-screen TV was mounted on the wall with speakers in every corner of the ceiling, promising great sound. A dartboard hung over a shelf that held a solid collection of board games.

  “I used to be pretty decent at pool.”

  Andy nodded. “Then pool it is. Maybe you’re good enough to keep Lexi in check. It’s more fun that way.”

  “You only won last time because I let you,” Lexi sniffed.

  “And because you lost control of your stick,” Andy snapped back.

  Delancey signed him to follow her to the stick rack. “They’ll do this all night.”

  “Sounds fun.” More fun than he’d anticipated. Andy’s disinterest in his scars had been an unexpected turning point. He was actually looking forward to the next few hours.

  “Eight Ball with partners or Cutthroat?” Lexi asked Logan with a self-satisfied grin while chalking her stick.

  “Ladies choice,” Logan offered. He wasn’t big on going out, but he did okay in small groups. And he’d gotten very comfortable at a pool table during college.

  “Eight Ball,” Delancey said. “Boys versus girls.” She winked at Andy. “We’ll even let you break.”

  “You’re feeling cocky. Been practicing?”

  Lexi chuckled. “We just want to give you first shot at ball busting.”

  Andy pointed to the women and shook his head. “You believe this?”

  “Sure.” Logan blew the extra chalk off the tip of his stick. “It’s been my experience women’s minds invariably wind up in the sewers during a game of pool.”

  “Right,” Delancey said in the level tone Logan had used. “Men never think dirty thoughts during pool. Guests break first, Logan.”

  Several dirty thoughts about Delancey and the black felt sprang to mind, but he bit them back. Taking the cue ball to position it where he wanted, he allowed a small smile that didn’t pull too much. “I’ll try not to disappoint.”

  He ignored Lexi’s dig about him being able to handle a stick. She was wasting no time with the trash talk, so he wasted none playing nice. Testing the range his injured skin allowed, he slid the stick back and forth a few times. On an inhale he drew the stick back and on an exhale he drove it forward.

  The cue ball slammed into the yellow solid and with a series of clanks and clinks balls smacked each other, rolled across the table and fell into pockets. Only ten balls remained on the table.

  “Pretty decent?” Delancey asked.

  “I was a double math major in college. Pool is math.” Shooting a smile at Andy, he asked, “You good with stripes?”

  Andy settled on a barstool with his drink and shrugged. “You already sank three of the seven. I’m gonna say yeah.”

  Logan walked around the table, evaluating the angles and odds of differe
nt shots and follow-up shots. A crooked smile curled Delancey’s lips while she watched him. Win or lose he enjoyed seeing that look on her face.

  Going for the win, he picked his shot, took up his stance and drove the cue into the cue ball. The skin over his shoulder blade protested the force he used. He winced, but the ball went in. Still burning from the previous shot, he missed the next one.

  “Thanks for lining me up. I like a sure thing,” Lexi crowed as she moved into place.

  “You do any damage?” Delancey asked quietly when he passed her.

  “Doesn’t feel like it.”

  “Trust me. You’d know.”

  He considered going for a shot of whiskey to numb the discomfort, but decided against it in fear he’d miss the warning when he went too far. Settling for the drink Delancey had mixed him, Logan moved to the table where Andy was.

  Andy raised his glass in a toast. “I like your definition of decent.”

  “My dorm had a pool table in the commons. I had a study group that would quiz each other over pool. Angles, velocity, force, trajectory.”

  Lexi took a shot and sank a solid. Unfortunately the cue ball followed. Her pouty face only lasted a second before her cheer was back in place and she was talking smack. “Seduce a lot of girls talking like that?”

  “Only the ones who knew what the words meant and how to apply them.”

  Andy chuckled and looked for his next shot, which he took and made. “Maybe it’s a guy thing to have a mastery of getting it—” he took the next shot and made it, “—in the hole.”

  “You gonna tell us you’ve never heard the words ‘that’s not it’?” Lexi challenged.

  “Darlin’, what makes you think a man like me would ever hear that?”

  “The fact that you’re a man.”

  Logan watched the word play between Lexi and Andy. The joking and camaraderie reminded him of the afternoons and evenings spent around the pool table. He hadn’t stayed in touch with any of those college companions, and he wasn’t sure how often he’d see Andy and Lexi after tonight, but he knew he wanted to.

  Andy took the next shot, sinking in their final ball before going for the eight ball. The only chance was for him to pull off a ridiculously hard bank shot with just enough power to kiss the ball into the pocket.

  Lexi talked nonstop, obviously hoping to distract Andy. Delancey, who was normally pretty chatty, stood back and studied the table.

  Andy took the shot and missed.

  “Wahoo!” Lexi cheered. “You can do it, D. Only four balls, and the boys have set you up nicely.”

  “She’s never sunk four balls in a row,” Andy taunted. “Logan is so crushing this on his next turn.”

  “Your support means the world to me, Andy.” Delancey adjusted her stance and shot.

  Her solid rolled into the pocket and for one breath-holding second it looked like she’d scratch. The cue ball tapped the bumper at just the right angle to change direction.

  “Luck,” Andy said.

  “Skill,” Lexi argued.

  Delancey had obviously planned her plays because she sank the next two balls quickly and clearly. The next shot was tougher, but doable if she hit it just right.

  “You’ve got this, D.”

  “In your dreams,” Andy added.

  “Just pretend it’s one of Andy’s balls and you can’t miss.”

  Delancey paused in her stance and looked up at her cousin. “You do something to set her off?”

  He raised his hands in a sign of surrender. “Haven’t touched her.”

  Even an asocial number geek like Logan would have to be blind to miss Lexi’s blush. The lack of touching could be the rub.

  “Yeah. That mouth of yours couldn’t possibly cause trouble.”

  “Speaking of mouths, why don’t you close yours and take your shot?”

  “Touchy, Cousin.” Her grin slipped when she resumed her stance. Even from his angle, Logan knew she’d miss the shot.

  “Delancey.”

  “Yeah?”

  Logan shook his head when she glanced up.

  “Traitor!” Andy exclaimed. “What are you doing?”

  Logan ignored Andy. Maybe he shouldn’t help an opponent, even when playing for fun, but this was something he could do for her. He wasn’t going to make the shot for her. “Shift your cue a little left. Just a hair. And strike the ball just above center.”

  “You’re helping the enemy.” Andy shook his head looking terribly sad. “I thought I could trust you.”

  “She kept me well fed in the hospital. A little pointer seems the least I can do. It’s up to her to make it work.” Stepping up behind her, feeling her heat before actually touching her, he suddenly had other thoughts in mind. Thoughts that involved them being alone and him bending her over the pool table.

  Taking things slow, staying safe, lost importance. Refusing to be the kind of cliché found in romance novels, he stopped himself from brushing against her while he gave her pointers.

  Delancey made the change he suggested and made the shot. She was smiling when she lined up the shot for the eight ball. She hit the cue ball a little too hard and scratched.

  “Oh yeah.” Andy cheered as happily as Lexi had earlier. “All the help in the world can’t help you beat me.”

  “It’s because I love you, Andy, that I’m not going to say anything about the help you got from Logan.”

  “I won’t deny he’s good, but I can beat you without his help.”

  Andy’s declaration was taken as a dare that led to a cousin-against-cousin rematch. The more they trash-talked each other the worse they played. And the more Logan and Lexi laughed while they enjoyed their pizza and fresh drinks.

  For the first time since the fire his mind was at peace. He stopped thinking about work or things Ashley had wanted. He didn’t worry about medical bills or debating whether or not he wanted to reopen an office. He wasn’t mentally crunching numbers to see if he could afford the house and its needed updates now that he had so many medical bills.

  He was laughing with a woman over the antics of another woman and a man he might one day call a friend. It was a nearly perfect evening.

  When Lexi and Andy left a few hours later the uncommon peace remained. He’d been happy with life and Ashley. They’d laughed and talked. They had lives apart from each other. Ashley more accurately had a life beyond him. They’d never played together. He’d never played with anyone like he had tonight.

  Delancey locked the front door behind her friends and began picking up the cups and plates they left behind.

  Logan picked up the pizza box and a few glasses and followed her to the kitchen. “Your friends are great.”

  “You had fun?”

  “More than I thought possible.” They’d accepted him quickly and without a hint of judgment. Nice as they’d been he’d expected to find them sneaking glances at his scars. The only one he’d caught looking at him had been Delancey, and it hadn’t been because of his burns.

  Each time he’d caught her watching him he’d stopped caring about pool and making clean shots. He’d stopped feeling different. Her smile, her laugh, her ease with other people… They were enviable qualities. Enviable and arousing.

  Logan put the pizza box in the trash can and moved to the sink where Delancey rinsed the glasses. He put a glass in the sink and then slid his hand up her arm.

  She froze.

  He curled his fingers over her arm and turned her to face him. All the almost kisses and charged moments and the kiss in his kitchen rushed him in a flood of images. Seizing the moment, taking chances, being brave, weren’t strengths of his. He’d chosen math in college because it was safe and the rules never changed.

  Surprises and change weren’t welcome in his life, but he’d be a fool not to explore the change staring him in the face. Delancey had been one surprise after another and nothing bad had happened. Maybe the same could be said about a change in the pace of their relationship.

  “Logan?�
�

  His thumb moved in a circle over the sleeve of her shirt. He stared into her eyes. “You have the kindest heart. You shared your vulnerability and your friends with me.” He shook his head before she could minimize what she’d done. “I wonder if you’d share something else with me.”

  “Something? Like what?”

  He brought his second hand up and cupped her neck. “You.”

  “Me?” Her voice cracked.

  “Yes, you.” Logan’s pulse leapt with excitement.

  “Why?”

  “For a strong woman you seem suddenly unsure of yourself. Where’d the woman from my kitchen go?”

  “She thought things were going to move slowly.” Her shoulder jerked, but the insecurity was short-lived. “You don’t have to sound so happy about making me nervous.”

  “I said nothing about rushing. And I think I do.” Because it made her slightly less intimidating. Applying a little pressure to her neck, he eased her closer. “Everything about who you are makes me want you. It’s been unchanged since you first walked into my hospital room. Since you told me you didn’t want to be a part of lust getting in the way of my healing. ”

  “You said I was a mistake.”

  “When?”

  “On the Fourth.”

  The memory returned along with everything he’d said. He shook his head. “My going there was the mistake.”

  “Why?”

  “I’d wanted to see you. Badly. Then I saw you with all those people.” Why he’d said it was a mistake was coming back, making him wonder if he should’ve kept his mouth shut. “You were as comfortable with the big group as you were tonight.”

  “That bothers you.”

  Hell, yes. “No one wants to be around a scarred man who could put Two-Face to shame. Hell, one look at me and Freddy would stay home on Halloween.”

  “I always thought Two-Face was sexy. And Freddy’s a pussy who wishes he could borrow Jason’s mask.” Delancey pinched the fabric of his T-shirt, tugging it away from his stomach. “I would kiss you if you’d come down here.”

  “Will you wear pigtails and let me call you Gidget?”

  “Absolutely not.”