You Don't Know Me

by Mandy Lee

  Jesus. All that talk about gagging me wasn’t just talk after all?

  ‘Why would you gag me?’

  I feel him shrug. ‘I like to have complete control. It’s just my thing. To know that you can’t speak, even if you want to, it turns me on.’

  ‘Why?’

  A silence descends over us and I realise that I’m not going to get an answer, not tonight.

  ‘If you’re not happy with it, then we don’t go there.’

  ‘I might …’

  ‘Just think about it.’

  Nervously, I scan the drawer, my eyes landing on what seem to be two silver pegs attached by a length of silver chain. Each peg, I notice, has its own silver screw.

  ‘Pain,’ I breathe, sensing a twinge down below.

  ‘If it’s your thing, then it’s your thing. If it’s not, then so be it. I’ll only go as far as you want me to. Those are nipple clamps. You enjoyed it the other day. I bought them just in case you wanted to try it again. They can be adjusted to whatever you want to take. All of this can be pleasurable.’

  ‘You’ve used all of this stuff before? Your modus operandi?’

  ‘My preference. I didn’t hide that from you.’

  My heartbeat starts to pick up in pace.

  ‘You said that you’d dabbled. BDSM.’

  ‘I did.’

  ‘Tell me about it.’

  His grip tightens. His breath becomes shallow for a moment, and then he seems to regain control. I wish I could see his face now. I need to work out what’s going on in his mind. But it’s impossible. I’m held firmly in place against his chest.

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ he says at last. ‘I’ve done some pretty hard core stuff, but that’s all over now. All you need to know is that it was always done with consent.’

  ‘And what did you get out of it?’

  ‘A level of gratification at the time, but it never lasted. This is all pretty soft to be honest with you, but it can bring intense pleasure.’ I feel his lips against my neck. Brushing a trail behind my ear, they send a spark of anticipation right down to my groin. ‘It’s too soon.’

  As he reaches down to shut away the contents, I watch in surprise as my own hand shoots out to stop him.

  ‘No,’ I whisper. ‘It’s not too soon.’

  His hand hovers in mid-air, wavering there for a few seconds, waiting for me to change my mind until finally, when I don’t, it returns to the cuffs. He rests a finger against the leather, and I listen to his breathing. It’s sharper now.

  ‘Maya, don’t blunder into something you’re not sure about.’

  ‘I’m not blundering. I want to try it.’

  For a few seconds more, he holds me exactly where I am, his left arm tight around my stomach. I feel his heartbeat pounding against my spine and all I can hear now is my own nervous breathing, jittering, each breath catching against the next.

  ‘So be it. Give me your hand.’

  I raise my left hand, watching intently as he takes it in his fingers, slowly wrapping the cuff around my wrist. One by one, he fastens the buckles, checking that the leather isn’t too tight against my skin.

  ‘Other one.’

  Repeating the process, he motions for me to present my right hand. Sliding the leather around my skin, he fastens the buckles and checks for comfort. When he’s finally satisfied, his fingers close around the cuffs, pausing there for a moment before he reaches out and picks up the blindfold. I watch as he straightens it out in front of my eyes, as the black silk is brought closer to my face. And then I’m plunged into darkness, the fabric soft against my skin. He knots it at the back of my head, just tight enough that it won’t move.

  ‘Does that feel okay?’

  ‘Yes.’

  The next thing I know, the shirt is pulled over my head. I’m lifted up in his arms and carried over to the bed. He lays me down gently, sweeping my hair out of my face and running a finger down the side of my cheek. I’m left where I am for a minute or so, but judging by the sounds I can hear now, he’s taking off his clothes.

  ‘Put your hands up, Maya.’

  I do exactly as I’m told, my mouth drying up with anticipation. The bed lowers as he climbs onto it, settling himself by my side. Within seconds, I feel his warmth next to me, his skin against mine. One hand is manoeuvred into place behind my head, and then the other. He repositions himself above me, and I hear a clink of metal, the shifting of straps. My wrists are tethered into place, my arms pulled tight as the cuffs are adjusted. He takes his time, making sure that everything is perfect, that I’m completely comfortable.

  ‘You look beautiful like this.’ He traces a finger from my neck, down the centre of my torso. The finger pauses at my stomach, swirling its way lazily around my belly button before travelling further downwards, skirting the insides of my thighs. I let out a groan as flickers of electricity travel throughout my body.

  ‘Spread your legs. Further.’

  Again, I do as I’m told. Again, the bed moves. I hear his footsteps padding away from me, then back again.

  ‘I’d like to restrain your legs. Are you okay with that?’

  Am I? I have no idea. I’m already blindfolded with my hands pinned down by cuffs and straps. Well, what difference is it going to make? I nod mutely and immediately, a strip of leather is wound around my left ankle, and then another around my right. I sense the sudden resistance as the straps are attached and gradually tightened until he’s happy with my position. With another movement, he’s back by my side. His lips touch against mine and then close over my mouth, his tongue swirling slowly, lazily around mine for an age. A hand cups my cheek before working its way around my neck, a warm palm here, fingertips there.

  ‘You need a safeword,’ he breathes against my mouth. ‘Something you’re going to be able to drag out of your head when you can’t think straight.’

  Fingers stroke their way slowly down my neck, across my right breast, pausing to explore my nipple. They move on, downwards across my stomach, sending tingles of pleasure throughout my body, and then further, patiently stroking my crotch over and over again before his hand closes around my clit, pressing in on me, setting off a flood tide of spasms. I strain against the cuffs, wanting instinctively to bring my legs together.

  ‘Safeword, Maya,’ he reminds me. ‘You say it, I stop.’

  I can barely think straight as it is, but he seems determined to get a safeword out of me. I fumble through the jumbled mess that is my mind, and all I can think of is that stupid, bloody machine in his office.

  ‘Coffee!’ I splurt.

  I hear him chuckle.

  ‘Coffee, it is.’

  His lips travel downwards, kissing my throat, my chest, working their way slowly, languidly in towards my nipples. He takes the left nipple first, sucking and lapping at it tenderly, sending waves of electricity coursing through my body, right down to my stomach, and further to my clitoris. I hear myself moan like some sort of wanton hussy as he moves on to my right nipple, repeating the same process, slowly, patiently cupping my breast with his hand, gently massaging it as he sucks and licks and nips.

  ‘You enjoyed the pain yesterday,’ he whispers.

  ‘I did.’ Jesus. Where did that come from?

  ‘Do you want it again?’

  ‘I do.’

  What? Did I really just say that? Before I can take it all back and ask if I can possibly have a little time to think about the whole pain thing, he latches onto my nipple, gripping it between his teeth. I cry out as I’m hit by a wall of agony. My mind is emptied of doubt in a split second. He bites again, holding my stomach down with his hand. I cry out again, tugging at the cuffs, holding onto my breath, waiting for it all to subside.

  ‘No more,’ I manage to gasp, my breath coming in shorter spurts, my entire body quaking at the after effects of his onslaught. ‘Not yet.’

  Somewhere at the back of my head a voice screams out at me. And I know it’s my own voice, my reasonable, logical voice. And it’s doing
its utmost to be heard. You need time to think your way through this, lady! Why the hell did you just enjoy abject pain? Are you a masochist? Because if you are, then Jesus, you must be really fucking screwed up!

  ‘No more,’ he confirms, lapping his tongue against my nipple, soothing it before he begins to run his lips slowly downwards.

  Adjusting his body above me, he comes to rest between my legs. I’m still trying to control my breathing when his big hands wrap themselves around my waist. He skims his palms up and down my sides, over and over again, finally bringing them down to my legs. Closing his fingers tight around me, he digs his thumbs into the insides of my thighs. I tense immediately, unsure of where he’s going with this. He keeps me there for a few seconds before finally releasing his hold. I feel his warm breath against my stomach, and then his lips, gently fluttering against my skin, sending tiny tremors through my nerves. I hear myself moan. I try to writhe about. It’s instinctive, but he stops me immediately, pushing me back into place and digging his thumbs into my thighs one more time. It’s almost uncomfortable, but strangely pleasurable. It’s his silent command and I stop moving immediately. Those thumbs are going to send me into a spin if he does that one more time. Another movement. And finally, his tongue trails lightly along the length of my clit, once, twice. On the third run, it pauses to lap at my labia. I moan again. My muscles spasm.

  ‘Please,’ I groan. ‘I need you inside me.’

  ‘No talking.’

  A hand curls around my thigh, squeezing a reminder into my skin. His tongue returns to my clit, gently circling, working me up into a frenzied mess. I try to squirm but my legs won’t budge and a hand comes to rest on my stomach, holding me firmly in place.

  ‘You’ll do this my way.’

  Almost immediately, a finger is thrust into my vagina. It’s withdrawn and replaced with two. I cry out, not with pain, but with shock at the sudden change of tactic. The tongue returns to my clit while the fingers work at the front of my vagina, finding that magic spot and slowly massaging me out of my mind. He must be able to feel the spasms, to judge when I’m about to come because just as I’m about to implode, he stops.

  ‘Let’s keep you on the edge for a while.’

  I know that he’s above me now. The mattress dips at either side of my head. I feel his warm breath against my face.

  ‘Taste yourself.’ A finger enters my mouth and I suck greedily. He takes it out, running it along my lips, and then he kisses me again, lowering his body onto mine, his hand cupping the back of my head, gripping a handful of hair and holding me still while he rubs his erection against me. This alone is going to send me wild. I can’t grind back. It’s impossible.

  ‘What do you want, Maya?’ he whispers into my mouth, his voice loaded with desire.

  ‘I want you.’

  ‘Not good enough.’

  He presses another kiss into my mouth, forcing his cock against my groin. I could scream already.

  ‘What do you want?’

  ‘I want you to fuck me,’ I pant.

  ‘What’s the magic word?’

  ‘Please.’

  He sits up. I feel his hands on my clit again, probing at my opening, examining my lips, slowly separating them, sliding a finger part way in and then out again. Oh God. He’s having a good look at me. I know he is. If I wasn’t restrained, I’d squirm with embarrassment. He seems to pick up on my unease.

  ‘Relax,’ he murmurs. ‘It’s nothing to be shy about, Maya. You’re beautiful, every last bit of you.’

  The fingers return to my vagina, working slowly. And they’re joined this time by a third, on the outside, working at my clit. He’s still kneeling up between my legs and, oh God, he’s watching me. I know it. It seems to go on for an age. Nothing is said. I listen to my breathing as it grows faster, more shallow. He doesn’t seem to tire. Keeping up the same rhythm, the same pace, he waits patiently as the pressure rises deep inside me. I’m on the verge of exploding when the fingers are removed.

  ‘No!’ I cry out. ‘Why? Let me come now.’

  I struggle against the bindings. In an instant, he moves again and I’m gripped by the chin.

  ‘When I say.’

  The fingers return, more this time, maybe three, and they thrust deeper, stretching me, probing, exploring, feeling out for my reaction. At last he gets what he wants. Somewhere deeper inside, he’s found another spot. He focuses on it now, taking his time, working at it slowly so that the pressure inside me builds to the point of explosion. I try to writhe again. His hand push me down again.

  ‘No,’ I gasp. ‘I can’t take much more.’

  ‘You know what to say.’

  His tongue returns to my clit, working me towards the edge, from the outside as well as the inside. My brain has emptied itself out now. I’m in a stupor. And I’m covered with sweat. I can barely catch my breath.

  ‘This is fucking beautiful.’

  ‘Please … let me …’

  ‘Shush.’

  I can barely think any more. I certainly can’t string a sentence together. Why can’t the fucking man just let me come?

  ‘Do you want me to finish this, Maya?’

  ‘Yes …’

  His fingers come to a halt.

  ‘Maybe I will,’ he whispers. ‘But then again, maybe I’ll keep you going like this for an hour or so.’

  ‘No,’ I groan. ‘I’ll die.’

  I hear him laugh gently.

  ‘Then all you need to do is say you’ll give yourself up to me.’

  ‘What? Why?’

  Is that it? Is he torturing me into true submission?

  ‘Because it’s what I need. Complete control. And you haven’t given that to me yet.’

  ‘But, I …’

  His fingers edge inside me one more time, moving slowly, picking up where they left off. I sense the beginning of contractions deep inside, delicious, aching. And already, I know he won’t let me see them through unless I give him what he wants.

  ‘Give yourself to me.’

  ‘Yes,’ I splutter. ‘But only in bed. In bed. Only in bed.’ I may be a mess right now, and shit this really is pleasure on a grand scale, mind-fucking pleasure, but I’m not about to give up on any of my basic human rights.

  ‘Or wherever else I decide to fuck you senseless.’

  ‘Okay!’ I shout. ‘Yes! Yes, I do!’

  The fingers are withdrawn.

  ‘No,’ I cry. ‘I said yes! Don’t stop!’

  ‘I’m not stopping. You wanted me to fuck you. Remember your word.’

  I barely have time to choke back a cry before he’s inside me, hitting the back wall of my vagina, knocking the breath clean out of my body. He withdraws, right to the hilt, before ramming into me again … and again, relentlessly, viciously, like a machine. Before long, the pressure is back, every single muscle down below on the verge of an explosion. My body can’t cope with much more of this.

  ‘Dan! For God’s sake!’ I scream.

  ‘Make as much noise as you want. No one can hear you.’

  He picks up the pace now, the strength of his blows remaining hard, moving at a frenzied speed. I hold on, trying desperately to find something, anything to keep me from being torn apart. I can barely make it when he finally cries out.

  ‘Now, Maya!’

  I implode, and while I gasp and claw for breath, convulsion after convulsion rips its way through my insides, electric shocks shimmering across my nerves. I moan incoherently as he collapses on top of me, his body straddling mine. Struggling for breath, he buries his head in my neck.

  ‘Fucking hell,’ he mutters. ‘Fucking perfect.’

  He stays inside me for an age, his penis throbbing its way down from his orgasm. At last, I feel him move, steadying himself while he takes off the blindfold. I blink a few times and I’m rewarded with a beautiful, full on smile. ‘My woman likes it kinky,’ he grins.

  ‘I think I do,’ I pant. ‘Shit, why has it never been like that before?’

&nbs
p; ‘You’ve not lived.’

  ‘And this is soft?’

  ‘Believe me, it is.’

  ‘So, what’s hard core?’

  The smile dissolves.

  ‘I told you. I don’t want to talk about that. I’ve left that world behind.’

  He brushes his lips against mine, kissing me softly before he pulls himself out of me. I’m still twitching and pulsing inside. He cups my clitoris, patiently massaging me down, staring into my eyes the whole time. At last, he reaches down and releases my legs, then leans over and releases my arms. I manoeuvre myself into his embrace, my back against his chest, feeling his cooling sweat. His arms close around me. His right hand slides over mine and he begins to interlace our fingers.

  ‘I need to tell you something,’ he whispers.

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘I’m never going to get enough of you.’ He runs a hand gently across my breasts, down to my stomach and I grin like an idiot. ‘This isn’t asset stripping.’

  I want to turn my head and examine his expression, to see if it’s as serious as the tone he’s just taken on, but I’m held tight against him, as if he’s scared to let me go.

  ‘What is it then?’ I ask.

  ‘Mergers.’ He pauses. ‘And acquisitions.’

  Another silence cloaks us while I try to soak up what he’s just said.

  ‘Who’s acquiring who?’ I ask.

  He doesn’t answer.

  ‘Are you hungry?’

  ‘Starving.’ I yawn. My eyelids are heavy. ‘And I’m knackered too. I actually had to do some work today.’

  I hear him chuckle.

  ‘You’re a hard task master, Mr Foster,’ I murmur.

  ‘I’ve not even started yet,’ he murmurs back and although I know he’s smiling again, I’m not entirely sure that he’s referring to office work, and I’m not completely certain that it’s really a joke. ‘Close your eyes for a while. Have a rest.’

  I do as I’m told. And I’m fine with that, because right now all I really want to do is sleep. And I want to sleep in his arms.