Stone Cold Undercover Agent

by Nicole Helm

  But Alyssa didn’t move. She eyed the FBI agent, both with their weapons raised at each other.

  “Ma’am, if you do not lower the weapon, I will be forced to shoot. You have to the count of three. One, two—”

  “Ugh, fine,” Alyssa relented, lowering her arm. She didn’t drop the weapon and she stared at the men with nothing but a scowl.

  “They’re here to save us,” Gabby said, feeling a bubble of hysteria try to break free. She wanted to cry. She wanted to throw herself at these men’s feet. She wanted Jaime and to know for sure...

  “It’s over, isn’t it?” she asked, a tear slipping down her cheek.

  “Ma’am, you have to drop your weapon. We cannot escort you out of here until you do,” he said to Alyssa, ignoring Gabby completely.

  “There are two other women inside the house. Did you—?” Gabby had started to step forward, but one of the men held up his hand and she stopped on a dime.

  “We will not be discussing anything until she drops her damn weapon,” the man said through gritted teeth.

  There were four of them, three with their weapons trained on Alyssa, a fourth one behind the three on a phone, maybe relaying information to someone.

  Alyssa had her grip on the gun so tight her knuckles were white and Gabby didn’t know how to fix this.

  “What are you doing?” Gabby demanded. She wanted to go over and shake Alyssa till some sense got through that hard head of hers, but she was afraid to move. They were finally free and Alyssa was going to get them both killed.

  That made her a different kind of angry. “Why are you treating us like the criminals?” she demanded of the four men, soldier-stiff and stoic.

  “Why won’t you drop your weapon?” the agent retorted.

  Gabby didn’t know how long they stood there. It seemed like forever. Alyssa neither dropped her weapon, nor did the men lower theirs. Seconds ticked on, dolls watching from above, and all Gabby could do was stand there.

  Stand there in limbo between prison and freedom. Stand there with the threat of this woman who’d become an ally and a friend dying when they’d come this far.

  “Please, Alyssa. Please,” Gabby whispered after she didn’t know how long. Gabby had spent eight years trying to be strong. Beating any emotion out of herself, but all strength did in this moment was make this standoff continue.

  She looked at Alyssa, letting the tears fall from her eyes, letting the emotion shake her voice. “Please, put down the gun,” she whispered. “I want you safe when we get out of here. I don’t want to have to watch you get hurt. Please, Alyssa, put down the gun.”

  Alyssa swallowed. She didn’t drop the gun, though her grip loosened incrementally.

  “We all want this to be over,” Gabby said, pushing her advantage as hard as she could. “We all want to go home.”

  “I don’t,” Alyssa muttered, but she dropped the gun all the same.

  * * *

  JAIME SUPPOSED THAT someday in the future it would be a point of pride that he’d yelled at his superior over the phone and had to be restrained by three fellow agents, and still retained his job.

  But when Agent Lucroy had explained there’d been a standoff—a standoff—with two women who had been captives, no matter how dangerous he’d felt Alyssa could be, Jaime had lost it.

  He’d sworn at his boss. He’d thrown the phone across the ranger station. The only thing that had kept his temper on a leash as they’d waited for the ambulance was the fact that Natalie was Gabby’s sister.

  She didn’t need to be as sick with fear and as stuck as he was.

  The being restrained by three fellow agents had come later. When they’d had to forcibly put him on a flight to the field office in San Antonio instead of to Austin with Ranger Cooper and Natalie.

  There had been a slight altercation once getting off the plane when he’d demanded his car and been refused. In the end, a guy he’d once counted as a friend had had to pull a gun on him.

  He’d gotten himself together after that. Mostly. He’d met with his boss and had agreed to go through the mandatory debriefing, psych eval and the like. Sure, maybe only after Agent Lucroy had threatened to have him admitted to a psych ward if he didn’t comply.

  Semantics.

  He was held overnight in the hospital, being poked and prodded and mentally evaluated. When he’d been released, he was supposed to go home. He was supposed to meet his superiors at noon and inform them of everything.

  Instead he’d gotten in his car and driven in the opposite direction. He very possibly was risking his job and he didn’t give a damn. He should go see his parents, his sister. They were in California, but if he was really going to take a break with reality, shouldn’t it be to have them in his sight?

  When he’d spoken to Mom on the phone, she’d begged him to come home, and when he’d said he couldn’t, she’d said she’d be heading to San Antonio as soon as she could. He’d begged her off. Work. Debriefing.

  The truth was... He wasn’t ready to be Jaime Alessandro quite yet. He’d neither cut his hair nor shaved his beard. He was neither FBI agent nor Stallion lackey, he was something in between, and no amount of FBI shrinks poking at him would give him the key to step back into his old life.

  Not until he saw Gabby. So he drove to Austin. Thanks to Ranger Cooper apparently being unaware that he wasn’t supposed to know, Jaime had the information that Gabby was still in the hospital and had yet to be reunited with her family.

  When Ranger Cooper had relayed that information, Jaime may have broken a few traffic laws to get to the hospital.

  All he needed was to see her, to maybe touch her. Then he could breathe again. Maybe then he could find himself again.

  Maybe then he’d forgive her for not getting out when he’d wanted her to.

  He did some fast talking, but either the hospital staff was exceptionally good or they’d been forewarned. No amount of flashing his badge or trying to sneak around corners worked.

  Eventually security had been called. When one security guard appeared, Jaime laughed. Then another had appeared behind him and he figured they were probably serious.

  He wasn’t armed, but there were ways he could easily incapacitate these men. He could imagine breaking the one in front’s nose, the one in back’s arm. This middle-aged, not-in-the-best-of-shape security guard and his burly partner. Bam, bam, quick and easy.

  It was that uncomfortable realization—that he was pushing too hard, pressing against people who didn’t deserve it—that had him softening.

  So, when the guards grabbed him by the arms, he let them. He let them push him out the doors and into the waiting room.

  “What the hell is your problem, man?” the one guy asked, clearly questioning the truth of his FBI claims.

  That was a good enough question. He was acting like a lunatic. Not at all like the FBI agent who had been assigned and willfully taken on the deep undercover operation that had just aided in busting a crime organization that had been hurting the people of this state—and others—for over a decade.

  “You come through these doors again, the police will be taking your ass to jail. FBI agent or not.”

  Jaime inclined his head, straightening his shoulders and then his shirt. “I apologize,” he managed to rasp, turning away from the guards only to come face-to-face with two women frowning at him.

  “Why are you trying to see my daughter?” the middle-aged woman demanded, her hands shaking, her eyes red as though she’d done nothing but cry for days.

  If she was Gabby’s mother, perhaps she had.

  It was the thing that finally woke him up. Really and fully. Gabby’s mother, and a woman who looked to be Gabby’s grandmother. He’d assumed Natalie wasn’t there, but then she walked in from the hallway carrying two paper cups of coffee.

 
“Agent Alessandro,” she said, stopping short. “Did something hap—?”

  “No, Ms. Torres. I merely came by to check on your sister, and I was informed, uh...” He glanced at the women who’d likely seen him get tossed out on his ass. “She wasn’t seeing visitors.”

  Natalie handed off the drinks to the other two women, offering a small and weak smile. “She’s asked not to see anyone for a bit longer yet, from what the doctor told me.”

  “And her, uh, health? It’s...”

  “As good as can be expected. Maybe better. They’ve had a psychiatrist talking to her a bit. Are you here to question her? I’m not sure—”

  “The case we’re building against The Stallion will take time, but your sister’s contributions... Well, we’ll certainly work with her comfort as much as we can.”

  He looked at the three women who’d been through their own kind of hell. He didn’t know them. Maybe they’d spent eight years certain Gabby was dead. Maybe they’d hoped for her return every night for however many nights she’d been gone.

  Gabby would know. She’d be able to figure out the math in a heartbeat, or maybe it was her heartbeat, every second away from her family.

  A family who had loved her and taken care of her for twenty years. A family who had far more claim to her than the man who’d spent a week with her and left her behind.

  He straightened his shirt again, clearing his throat. He pulled out his wallet, a strange sight. It held his ID with his real name. His badge. Things that belonged to Jaime Alessandro, not Rodriguez.

  He blinked for a few seconds, forgetting what he was doing.

  “Do you want me to call some—?”

  He thrust his business card at Natalie, effectively cutting off her too kind offer. “If you need anything, anything at all, any of you, please don’t hesitate to contact me. I’ll be back in San Antonio for at least another day or two, but it’s an easy enough drive.”

  Natalie looked at him with big brown eyes that looked too much like Gabby’s for his shaky control.

  “I want all three of you to know how strong Gab—Gabriella was during this whole ordeal,” he forced himself to say, feeling stronger and more sure with every word. FBI agent to the last. “She saved herself, and those women, and did an amazing amount of work in allowing us to confidently press charges against a very dangerous man.”

  She’d been a warrior, a goddess, an immeasurable asset and ally. She was a survivor in every iteration of the word, and he wasn’t worthy of her. Not like this.

  That meant he had to face his responsibilities and figure out how to come back as just that.

  Worthy of Gabby.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Gabby sat in a sterile hospital room dreading the seconds that ticked by. Every second brought her closer to something she didn’t know how to face.

  Life.

  Her family was in the waiting room. She’d been cleared by both the doctor and the psychiatrist to see them. To be released from the hospital. There’d be plenty of therapy and police interviews in the future, but for the most part she could go home.

  What did that even mean? Eight years she’d been missing. Eight years for her family to change. Daddy was gone. Who knew where Mom and Grandma lived. Surely, Natalie had her own life.

  Gabby sat on the hospital bed and tried not to hold on to it for dear life when the nurse arrived. Gabby didn’t want to leave this room. She didn’t want to face whatever waited for her out there.

  She’d rather go back to the compound.

  It was that thought, and the shuddering denial that went through her, that reminded her... Well, this would be hard, of course it would be. It would be painful, and a struggle, but it was better. So much better than being a prisoner.

  “Your family is waiting,” the nurse said kindly. “I’ve got your copy of the discharge papers and the referrals from the psychiatrist. Is there anything you’d like me to relay to your family for you?”

  Gabby shook her head, forcing herself to climb off the bed and onto her own two feet. Her own two feet, which had gotten her this far.

  She took a shaky breath and followed the nurse out of the safety of her hospital room. The corridor was quiet save for machine beeps and squeaky shoes on linoleum floors. Gabby thought she might throw up, and then they’d probably take her back to a room and she could...

  But they reached the doors and the nurse paused, offering a comforting smile. “Whenever you’re ready, sweetheart.”

  Gabby straightened. She’d never be ready, so taking a second was only delaying the inevitable. “Let’s go.”

  The nurse opened the doors and stepped out, Gabby following by some sheer force of will that had gotten her through eight years of hell.

  The nurse walked toward three women sitting huddled together. None of them looked familiar and yet Gabby knew exactly who they were. Grandma, Mom, Natalie. Older and different and yet them.

  Natalie got to her feet, her face white and her eyes wide as though she were looking at a ghost.

  Gabby felt like one. Natalie reached out, but it was almost blindly, as if she didn’t know what she was reaching for. As if Gabby were really a vision Natalie’s hand would simply move through.

  Her little sister. A woman in her own right. Eight years lost between them, and she was reaching out for a ghost. But Gabby was no ghost.

  “Nattie.” It was out of her mouth before Gabby’d even thought it. She grabbed Natalie’s hand and squeezed it. Real. Alive. Her sister. Flesh and bone and soul. They weren’t the same women anymore, but they were still sisters. No matter what separated them.

  Natalie didn’t say anything, just gaped at her. Mom and Grandma were still sitting, sobbing openly and loudly. Two women she’d barely ever seen cry. The Torres family kept their sadness on the down low or hidden in anger, but never...

  Never this.

  “Say something,” Gabby whispered to Natalie, desperate for something to break this tight bubble of pain inside her.

  “I don’t know...” Natalie sucked in a deep breath, looking up at Gabby who remained an inch or two taller. “I’m so sorr—”

  Gabby shook her head and cupped Natalie’s face with her hands. She would fall apart with apologies from innocent bystanders. “No, none of that.”

  Natalie let out a sob and her entire body leaned into Gabby. A hug. Tears over her. Gabby didn’t sob, but her own tears slid down her cheeks as she held her sister back.

  Real. Not a dream. Nothing but real. She glanced over Natalie’s head at her mother and grandmother. She held an arm out to them. “Mama, Grandma.” Her voice was little more than a rasp, but she used as commanding a tone as she could muster. “Come here.”

  It only took a second before they were on their feet, wrapping their arms around her, holding on too tightly, struggling to breathe through tears and hugs.

  Gabby shook, something echoing all the way through her body so violently she couldn’t fight it off. It was relief. It was fear. It was her mother’s arms wrapped tight around her.

  “Are you all right?” Natalie asked, clearly concerned over Gabby’s shaking. “Do you need a doctor? I’ll go get the nu—”

  But Gabby held her close. “I’m all right, baby sister. I just can’t believe it’s real. You’re all here.”

  “They...told you about...Daddy?”

  Gabby swallowed, her chin coming up, and she did her best to harden her heart. She’d deal with the softer side of that grief some other time. “The Stallion made sure I knew.”

  “But...”

  Gabby shook her head. She shouldn’t have mentioned that man, that evil. She was free, and she wasn’t going back to that place. “No. Not today. Maybe not ever.”

  “One of us needs to get it together so we can drive home,” Mama said, her hand shaking
as she mopped up tears. Her other hand was a death grip around Gabby’s elbow. Gabby didn’t even try to escape it. It was like an anchor. A truth.

  “I’m all right,” Natalie assured them. “I’ll drive. Right now. We’re free to go. We’re... Let’s get out of here. And go home.”

  “Home,” Gabby echoed. What was home? She supposed she’d find out soon enough. But as they turned to leave the waiting room, someone entered, blocking the way.

  Gabby’s heart felt as though it stopped beating for a good moment. She barely recognized him. He’d had a haircut and a shave and today looked every inch the FBI agent in his suit and sunglasses.

  She stiffened, because she wasn’t ready for this, because her first instinct was to throw herself at him.

  Because an angry slash of hurt wound through her. He hadn’t come to check on her, and no one had told her what had happened to him.

  She’d been afraid to ask. Afraid he’d be dead. Afraid he’d been a figment of her imagination. So afraid of everything outside these walls.

  Now he was just here, looking polished and perfect. Not Jaime, but the man he’d been before the compound. A man she didn’t know and...

  She didn’t know how to do all of this today, so she threw her shoulders back and greeted him coolly, no matter how big a mess she must look from all the crying.

  “Ms. Torres.”

  Even his voice was different, as though the man she’d known in the compound simply hadn’t existed. That had been a beating fear inside her for days and now it was a reality.

  She could only fight it with a strength she was faking.

  His gaze took her in quickly then moved to her sister. “Ms....well, Natalie, I’ve got a message for you.”

  Gabby’s grip tightened on Natalie’s arm, though she didn’t dare show a hint of the fear beating against her chest.

  “It’s from the Texas Rangers’ office.”

  It was Natalie’s turn to grip, to stiffen. Jaime held out a piece of paper and Natalie frowned at it. “They couldn’t have called me? Sent an email?” she muttered.

  Jaime’s gaze was on Gabby and she just...had to look away.