With the Last Goodbye

by Len Webster

  When she made it to her street, she felt her phone vibrate against her hand. She wrapped her fingers around it and pulled it out of her coat pocket. She smiled the moment she saw her boyfriend’s name on the screen. Josie accepted his call and pressed her phone to her ear.

  “Hey,” she greeted.

  “Happy Birthday, Josephine,” Max said.

  “Thank you. God, it feels like forever since I got to talk to you. How’s work?”

  He groaned. “Do we have to discuss work? It’s your birthday.”

  “It’s just Wednesday,” she stated. “The only person who knew was my dad. It was actually sweet. We had coffee for like ten minutes before he had to go.”

  “Is it snowing?”

  She glanced up and felt the snowflakes land on her face. “It’s only light,” she said as she made it to her apartment building. The renovated building had been bombed during World War II, and she loved learning about the history of the building’s restoration. Josie reached the gate and punched in the code.

  “God, I’m freezing my ass off,” Max complained.

  Josie pushed the gate open and walked through, laughing. “Isn’t there a heatwave or something back home? Let me guess, Gordon Sheridan air conditioning is going full blast right now?”

  Max hummed. “Not quite. You know, Josephine, you should really stop watching your feet while you walk, especially with snow on the path.”

  She halted her steps, realising what he had just said. Her heart hammered in her chest as if it knew. She was afraid to look up. Afraid it was all a trick and she’d experience bitter disappointment.

  “Josephine, look my way. I promise I’m right here.”

  Her chest heaved as she slowly lifted her chin and her eyes found him. He was standing by the large arch door with a bouquet of pink roses in his hand. She watched him hang up and slip his phone into his jacket pocket.

  Tears blurred him as she mirrored him and put away her phone.

  He was here.

  Max had come to Berlin for her birthday.

  It had been two months since she last saw him.

  And her heart loved the sight of him.

  She took him in. He was more beautiful with snowflakes settling in his brown hair. And those light brown eyes of his seemed to glitter as he held his arms open to her.

  Two months, and time and distance hadn’t broken them.

  So Josie ran.

  Not caring she could slip.

  She ran to him and threw her arms around his neck, holding him tight and sobbing into his hard chest. His arms around her was a reminder that this was home.

  Max was her home.

  “Oh, my God, how?” she managed to ask between sobs.

  “Your dad actually,” he answered as one of his hands cupped the back of her head.

  Josie pulled back, surprised. “What?”

  Max’s beautiful eyes gazed down at her. “He wouldn’t stop calling, and when I had enough, I answered. He let me yell at him before he asked if I could come to Berlin to see you. I told him I had plans to surprise you for your birthday but had no idea how to pull it off.”

  Her father had helped him.

  And that had her chest tightening.

  Forgiveness lined her heart, and she knew he had done an act that deserved a step towards redemption.

  She would thank him for helping get Max to her.

  Josie untangled her arms from around his neck and grasped his face in her palms. “I have missed you so much,” she breathed, pulling his lips to hers. Tears rolled down her cheeks from the touch of his lips alone.

  “God, Josephine,” he moaned into her mouth and kissed her with as much want and longing as she had.

  “I love you,” she whispered between kisses. “I love you, I love you—”

  Max’s hands trailed up her body until he gripped her shoulders and pulled her back. His lips were red from their kisses and the cold. His chest heaved, and his cheeks were pink. He looked her in the eye and whispered, “I love you,” finishing her declaration with his own.

  “I can’t believe you’re here right now.”

  He stepped back and held out the pink roses to her. “Berlin had my heart, remember? I thought it was time I joined her.”

  Laughing, Josie took the flowers from him. They were beautiful and bright. The definition and colour of La Vie En Rose.

  “I play your music box when I miss you,” he declared, getting her attention. “And it’s often, Josephine. It’s every time I come home from work and you’re still not there.”

  “Are you saying you miss me daily?” she teased.

  “I miss you far more often than that.”

  Josie got on her toes and kissed his cheek. “Me, too. As sweet and romantic as this is, the snow’s going to get worse. Weren’t you saying you were freezing just before? My apartment is upstairs.”

  Max took the roses from her. “Then let’s go because I seriously am freezing. You know there’s a heatwave back home?” he asked as she walked to the large arch doors and pushed her way into the old renovated apartment building.

  “Stella complains every day when she texts me,” Josie said as she led him through the foyer and to the elevator. It was one of her favourite features of the building. Unlike her apartment back home where one button was all it took for the doors to open, her West Berlin apartment required her to slide the black steel gate first and then the glass door before she could step into the elevator.

  Once she was inside, Max squished next to her, and she watched him slide the steel gate and then the glass door back into place. Then she reached across him and pressed the top floor button. When she looked for an apartment, Lazlo had helped her search. It was hard to find anything decent since she was a tourist. Then as if it were magic—though, she highly doubted so and believed it was her father’s doing—her current apartment was listed, and she moved in the next day. As much as she loved the hotel where she had been staying, she wanted her own privacy and space.

  Max’s cool fingers met hers in a gentle touch when he threaded them with hers. She flinched at just how cold he was but didn’t pull away. He was here. Real and solid and holding her hand.

  “Josephine,” he said in a soft but serious tone.

  She tilted her head up so she could see him. “Yeah?”

  “I could only get two days with you before I have to go back.”

  He heart dropped.

  “Two …?”

  He nodded. “Two days. I’m sorry. The days before Christmas are the worst, and I can’t leave my dad to do it all.”

  When the elevator reached her floor, she nodded and said, “It’s okay. Two days is two days I didn’t think I’d get with you. So I’ll take it.” She pulled her hand free and slid the elevator door and gate aside. They stepped out of the elevator, and Max closed it behind them. Then she led him down the hall towards her apartment. When she reached her front door, she dug into her handbag and pulled out her key, inserting it into the lock. Josie unlocked her door and pushed it open. She let Max enter first before she did.

  As he set the roses on the hallway table, she closed her apartment door and walked over to him, still in awe that he was in Germany.

  But only for two days.

  The little voice in her head reminded her of how temporary his stay was.

  Max took her keys from her, grasped the strap of her bag, and pulled it away from her, setting her bag and keys on the table. Then he reached over and traced the large button of her teal coat.

  “You’re not mad that I can’t spend Christmas with you?” he asked.

  The worry in his voice had her brushing his hands away from her and grasping the lapels of his winter coat. “Yeah, I am so mad that you flew for a whole day just so you could spend my birthday with me,” she teased as she brought his lips down to meet hers, kissing him with sheer relief that she could finally taste him and his love on his lips. He shivered against her, and Josie pulled back. “You’re still cold. I’ll start a fire.
”

  He shook his head. “Not right now. Bedroom. Which way to your bedroom?”

  “But—”

  “It’s been two months, Josephine. I promise, we’ll talk all night. We won’t stop talking, but God, I need you right now.”

  And that was all he had to say to get her to lead him to her bedroom. Once inside, he quickly undressed her with frenzy hands. Layers of clothes littered her floor until they were both naked. He tugged on her elbow so that his lips could press against hers as he walked them back to her bed.

  Unlike their reuniting kiss outside her apartment, this was slow.

  So very slow.

  It reminded her of the time he had made love to her the morning before she left for Berlin. It seemed like a lifetime ago, and it only had her threading her fingers through his slightly damp hair as his tongue slipped past the seam of her lips and found hers. Max’s palms ran up and down her body until a loud squeak had them pulling apart.

  “Stupid floorboard,” she groaned as Max cupped the back of her head with his hands.

  Chuckling, he said, “I can fix it.”

  Josie shook her head. No way was she letting him waste his two days with her by fixing a loose floorboard. “Please don’t. I just want to be with you for the next forty-eight hours.”

  Max bent down and kissed her softly, his lips moving perfectly against hers. “Okay. No fixing your floorboard.”

  Josie slowly pulled him down on her bed with her as he covered her body perfectly. That heaviness of him on top of her was wonderful. So greatly missed. She felt him hard against her core as he looked her in the eyes, staring as if he found something beautiful in them.

  Then his fingers ran down her neck, along her chest, to the curve of her right breast, the plane of her stomach, and made a soft line on her mound, causing her breath to hitch in anticipation.

  Her heart.

  Her poor heart exploded into mayhem.

  She couldn’t take her eyes off him as she felt him nudge at her entrance.

  “I can’t stop thinking about you,” he whispered. “I long for your emails and text messages. I crave for your voice. But this …” He slowly pushed inside her, and her mouth parted as a silent moan escaped her. “I needed this. This intimacy with you. To feel your love this way.”

  He inched deeper.

  “To watch your cheeks flush.”

  His hips flexed, and Josie dug her nails into his scalp, squeezing around his hardness in encouragement and desperation.

  “To feel pleasure no other woman has ever given me.”

  Max leant his forearms on either side of her head to hold his weight as he pressed a little deeper. The burn of him stretching her had her eyes closing, getting lost in their intimacy.

  “To whisper how much I love you as I completely fill you,” he let out in a hoarse voice, causing her to open her eyes.

  Oh, God …

  He whispered, “I love you so much, Josephine Faulkner,” as he thrust hard and filled her to the hilt.

  She was so full.

  And she had never felt more complete in her life.

  Josie moved her hands to cup his jaw, her eyes on his as her tears started to form. He didn’t move as she felt him throb inside her. Her thumb dipped and pressed against his bottom lip as she breathed, “I love you so much, Maxwell.” Then she pressed her lips against his as he slowly pulled out. When he thrust his hips and entered her, she moaned, “So much,” as he made love to her without the knowledge that time would catch up with them.

  If we don’t talk, maybe we can ignore it.

  Maybe it won’t happen.

  Maybe his plane will be delayed because of the snow.

  “How did two days go by so quickly?” Max asked in disbelief as his fingers trailed up and down her spine.

  She didn’t answer for fear the sob she had been holding back would escape her. Two days had gone by far too quickly. After they made love for the first time, they had spent so long talking and kissing that she hadn’t realised the sun had set. After their shower, he took her out to an Italian restaurant near his hotel. When they finished eating, he checked out of his hotel, and they took a taxi back to her apartment with his luggage. The only time they left her apartment was to eat and roam the streets together. They had lost track of time, and two days had been crossed out on the calendar.

  Max had to go back to Melbourne.

  He had to go back to Australia to return to work and spend Christmas with his family and friends.

  She didn’t have the heart to tell him that she didn’t have plans for Christmas, and she lied when she said that Heidi and Angelika were stopping by her apartment for Christmas lunch. Truth be told, her father and Johanna hadn’t extended her an invitation. Not that she expected one. She had made it clear for weeks that she wanted nothing to do with them. But she couldn’t demand that her sisters spend Christmas with her. That wasn’t fair to anyone. So Josie decided that her plans for the holidays were to study and get her summer units’ assignments finished.

  “You should get a Christmas tree,” Max said.

  “Why?” she finally asked.

  “Heidi and Angelika would like it.”

  They would, too.

  In the two days she had been with Max, she had been selfish and kept him to herself, but he didn’t seem to mind. He said he’d meet them another time. And he sounded as if he had so much hope that Josie had cried. He was really trying for her.

  “They would,” she agreed. “I’ll shop for a small one tomorrow. I’ll see if they can come over and decorate it.”

  “Good idea.”

  “Do you have a Christmas tree in your apartment?” she asked, still staring at the wilting roses on her bedside table. The same roses he had brought into her room after they made love on her birthday.

  “I do. Julian insisted I have one for when he, Stevie, Rob, and Ally come over for Christmas dinner.”

  Josie sat herself up, ignoring the fact she was naked, and gazed down at him. “How are they?” she asked, missing them as much as she missed Stella and West.

  “They’re all good. Happily married and engaged.”

  “That’s good,” she said.

  Max sat up and brushed his hair back. This morning, they had made slow and desperate love. Unlike yesterday when it was exciting and with abandonment, this morning, it was heartbreaking because they knew they’d be apart once again. Max had kissed her tears away and whispered promises as he made love to her. Promises she believed he’d make happen someday.

  She watched as he slipped out of bed, then picked up and slipped on his underwear. He stepped on that loose floorboard and chuckled on his way to his suitcase. Max had unzipped it and raked around. She presumed he was finally going to shower and dress for his flight. Instead, he pulled something out and climbed back on the bed with her.

  “I know we can’t spend Christmas together, but I’m glad we spent your birthday together. Happy Birthday, Josephine,” he said as he held up a white jewellery box.

  Josie squinted at it, shaking her head. “Whatever it is, I can’t—”

  He smiled as he lifted the lid and presented her with the most beautiful rose diamond teardrop necklace. It was stunning. Not only was the large rose diamond the most perfect colour she had ever seen, but the clearest diamonds surrounded it on a rose gold chain.

  “I saw it and thought of you,” he explained. “You are my life. My love. My La Vie En Rose.”

  “Max,” she breathed in awe.

  He set the box on the bed and gently pulled the necklace out. He unclasped it and held it over her chest. “I’m hoping it sits above your heart, and you know that no matter where we are, we will always be together. Distance hasn’t broken us, Josephine.” Then he leant forward and clasped the beautiful necklace around her neck to rest against her skin.

  Josie reached up and pressed her fingertips to the diamond. She knew he must have spent a lot of money on it, and even if he didn’t, it would always be the most expensive
possession to her. Sentiment meant more to Josie than dollars.

  “You love me, right?”

  Her eyes shot up to meet his. “I haven’t stopped loving you. I haven’t stopped saying it since you got here.” Then she got on her knees and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her breasts and his necklace against his naked chest. “You love me, right?”

  His eyes shone with unshed tears. “So much, Josephine. So much.”

  Then he buried his face into her neck, and Josie felt his warm tears slide along her skin.

  It felt like goodbye.

  Her whimpering heart knew.

  This is goodbye.

  Max was leaving Berlin on a snowy Friday morning.

  He had begged her not to come downstairs and see him off, but she couldn’t. They had made love one last time in her bed after their tears had dried. As they showered together, he held her under the warm water and continued to whisper her promises. Beautiful promises of a life together back home in Melbourne.

  Shivering against the cold wind, Josie wrapped her arms around herself as she stepped down the front step of her apartment building. Her thick coat didn’t protect her. She still shivered as she watched Max wheel his suitcase through the courtyard and to the waiting taxi she had Lazlo order for him. Her German was a disgrace, but she was learning some words and some phrases. She was determined to be fluent at it someday.

  She watched as Max shook the taxi driver’s hand, spun around, and made his way back to her. The snow had fallen heavily last night and blanketed the entire courtyard. It seemed as if Max sunk into the soft snow with every step he made towards her. When he finally reached her, he let out a sigh and gazed down at her. The smile he made was forced. Untangling her arms, her coat fell open and his eyes darted to his necklace she wore. His lips softened, and she knew that gentle, sad smile was real.