Trusting You

by Heather D'Agostino

  When we finished eating, Aaron paid the check, and then led me back out to the cars. “Have a good night,” our server waved her fingers at Aaron as we walked outside. He gave a quick nod, but otherwise didn’t acknowledge her.

  “What’s that all about?” I turned and looked up at him as we stopped by my mom’s car.

  “Nothing,” he muttered. He stuffed his hands in his pants pockets and rocked back on his heels. A gust of wind blew causing me to shiver. Aaron rolled his eyes as he shrugged out of his coat. He wrapped it around my shoulders as he shook his head.

  “Now you’re going to be cold,” I pulled the coat tighter around my shoulders. It smelled of his cologne and was warm with his body heat.

  “Yep, but now you won’t freeze,” he chuckled before blowing on his hands to try and warm them.

  We stood there for a few minutes before I decided I better give him his coat back, and go. He looked sexy standing there in his dark jeans and black button up. His sandy brown hair was blowing in the winter breeze, and the cold was making his cheeks rosy. “I better go before you freeze,” I giggled as I moved closer.

  I started to slip it off, but he stopped me. “You keep it for the ride home. It’ll give you a reason to let me see you the next time I’m here.”

  “Ok,” I smiled as I stuffed my hands in the pockets. I had to admit, it felt good wearing his coat. I really did like him, I was just scared that trusting him would break my heart. I couldn’t be what he wanted. I knew this, but he didn’t.

  When my hands slipped deeper in the pockets, I felt something. I thought it might be something he needed so I stopped him. “Wait!” I wrapped my fingers around what I thought was a business card and pulled it out, but what was in my hand was a condom.

  My heart sunk as realization registered. “You thought I’d sleep with you tonight. You planned on making me one of your hook ups,” I stammered.

  “That’s not it at all,” he shook his head as he held his hand out, trying I’m sure to salvage his story.

  I slipped out of his coat and tossed it to him, “I can’t do this. This was a mistake.” I climbed into the car and cranked it up as Aaron banged on the window.

  “Don’t do this, Mel. I don’t think you’re a hook up,” his voice was muffled through the glass. “I didn’t even know that was in there.”

  I shook my head before I felt the first tear fall. All these years I’d worked so hard to escape dates like these. This was why I didn’t date. All they ever wanted was sex, and I’d always given in, but not anymore. I was a new person now, and no one, not even Aaron Sutter, was going to change that.

  Chapter 5

  Melinda

  I spent most of Sunday in my room studying. I had a huge Bio test later in the week, and Mom had promised me quiet time. Other than a few knocks on my door asking about meals, my phone was the only thing to interrupt me. It started with texts.

  Aaron: I don’t think you’re that kinda girl.

  Aaron: Can we talk?

  Aaron: I’m sorry.

  Each time I deleted them. Somewhere in my head I guess I thought, if they weren’t there, they didn’t exist. It didn’t take long for the phone calls to start up. He was persistent, I’d give him that. I hit reject at least ten times throughout the day. When evening finally rolled around, I thought he’d given up. It had been a few hours since his last call, but I was wrong. As I was packing my things for my mom to take me back to school, it started ringing again. I stood there with my bag on my shoulder in the foyer of my parents’ house listening to my ringtone repeat over and over.

  “Aren’t you going to answer it?” Mom’s brow furrowed as she slipped into her coat.

  “No,” I shook my head as I hit reject again and stuffed it into my pocket. Within seconds I felt it vibrate, letting me know he’d left a voicemail. Part of me loved the fact that he was being so persistent. It felt good to know that he wasn’t going to give up, but another part of me wondered if it was all because I wasn’t giving in. I was a challenge, and he couldn’t accept that I was blowing him off.

  When I arrived back at school, I thanked my mom as per usual and headed into my dorm. Em was usually Skyping with Brock on Sunday nights so I made sure to make lots of noise getting the door open. I’ve never walked in on them doing anything, but I didn’t want to start now.

  “Thank God you’re back!” Em shouted in an exaggerated voice as she flopped back on her bed as I was coming through the door. I didn’t notice it then, but there was a huge vase of pink roses sitting on my desk.

  “Did Brock send you flowers?” I smiled. It was sweet and they smelled so good.

  “No dummy,” she laughed. “They’re for you.”

  I rolled my eyes, “Great.”

  “Um, is this not a good thing?” she sniffed one of the blooms and plucked the card out of the holder.

  “Not really,” I sighed as I tossed my things on my bed before shuffling over to the flowers. They were beautiful.

  “Read the card,” she bounced on her bed.

  “I already know who they’re from,” I shrugged as she shoved the small envelope in my hand.

  “Me too,” she giggled.

  I narrowed my eyes on her, “Did you already read this?”

  She giggled as she bit her bottom lip, “Maybe. You know I can’t keep a secret. They’ve been here since this morning. I stared at them for hours before I gave in. Are you mad?”

  “No,” I sighed. “You can have them.”

  “What happened?” she pulled her legs up and crossed them as she shifted on her bed. “I thought McGill’s was your favorite?”

  Of course she told him, “It is. It just isn’t going to work. He wants something that I’m not going to give him.”

  “Sex,” Emma clarified. “I’m sure if you tell him, he won’t expect you to. I mean, it’s a big choice.”

  “I’m not a virgin,” I stared at Emma. “It’s not that at all. I’m just not going to sleep with someone again until I find ‘the one’. It’s not worth it,” I muttered.

  “Someone really burned you, huh?” she folded her hands in her lap.

  “Something like that,” I began unpacking my bag.

  “Are you seeing someone?” she prodded.

  “What? No!” I shook my head as I set my books on my desk beside the flowers.

  “Well, I wondered if that’s why you go home each weekend,” Emma has always been nosy, but this is new for her.

  “I have to help my mom with stuff. I her owe her that much, and no I don’t want to talk about it,” I pushed a drawer shut as I ended the conversation.

  “Fine,” she mumbled as she leaned back against the pillow behind her. “So tell me about your date.”

  “We had a nice time. He gave me all of his attention. He was sweet, and attentive. It couldn’t have gone any better until the last few minutes,” I smiled at the memory of our time together and then frowned when I remembered how it ended.

  “What happened?” Emma propped her hands behind her head.

  “I found a condom in his pocket,” I deadpanned. “He pretended that he didn’t know it was there, but I know he knew. He thought if he was sweet enough that I’d just spread my legs and he’d score. That’s never gonna happen, so he just needs to move on,” I glared at the flowers, suddenly pissed that they were there.

  “This,” I flicked at one of the blooms, “needs to stop.”

  “Good luck with that,” Emma laughed. “I know my cousin, and I say this with love. He is the most stubborn man I know. He’s not going to give up.”

  I shook my head at the idea of Aaron’s pursuit. I didn’t know then, but the flowers were just the beginning. Over the next two weeks I received flowers three more times, and he called me at least once a day. I refused to talk to him hoping that he’d give up, but he didn’t. If anything, it made him more determined. Emma was right when she said he was stubborn.

  “We’re going out tonight, and you’re coming with,” Emma smiled as she
burst through the door to our room. It was Friday, and I was packing for the weekend. My mom would be here in the next hour or two, and I wanted to be ready.

  “You know I can’t,” I rolled my eyes. “It’s Friday.” I reached for another shirt and stuffed it in my bag.

  “Yes, you can. Call your mom and ask if you can stay here this weekend. You haven’t done that in months. I’m sure your mom can survive one weekend without you,” Emma groaned.

  “Not really,” I mumbled. Emma had no idea how much my mom really did need me. I was the reason that she had so much to do all the time. They helped me so I could come to Eastman. Now I owed them.

  “Please, Mel,” Em begged. “Just one night. You could go home in the morning.”

  The more I watched her pout, the more I wanted to give in and say yes. I hadn’t cut loose in forever, and one night wouldn’t kill me. No one around here knew that version of me, and tomorrow I could go back to this. “Let me send her a text and see,” I relented.

  “Yes!” Em fist pumped as she jumped up and down. “You text your mom. I’m going to find something for you to wear,” she giggled as she began digging through my drawers.

  I sent a text to my mom, and waited. It seemed to take forever for her to answer, and as I waited, I prepared for her to say no. She’d told me no before when I’d asked to stay, but I’d hoped this time would be different. Just once, I’d like to be a normal college girl. I wanted to do normal things that other twenty-year-olds did, but I knew I couldn’t. I wasn’t normal, and only my parents knew this.

  I grinned when I saw her answer flash up on the screen. I laughed as Emma pulled a red top out my drawer, “She said yes.”

  “See? I knew she would,” she tossed the shirt at me before going back to digging.

  “Where are we going?” I held up the top. I hadn’t seen it in years. I honestly forgot I had it. It was a deep red long-sleeved shirt with the shoulders cut out. It made my boobs look great, but I didn’t really wear fitted stuff anymore. I’d bought it for Valentine’s Day with Jason. I knew it looked good; at least Jason acted like it did.

  “There’s this bar that Brock and I went to a couple of times last year. They have the best drink specials.”

  “Did you forget I’m not twenty-one yet?” I placed my hands on my hips. I knew she had a fake ID, but I didn’t think she knew I had one.

  “This right here says you are,” she giggled as she tossed the piece of plastic at me.

  “Wait,” I looked at it. It was the same picture that was on my school ID, but different personal information. “When did you do this?” I rubbed it to check the authenticity. Emma didn’t know that she was giving me something I already had. The night she had planned was hitting a little too close to home.

  “Last week. I know somebody who knows somebody,” she shrugged. “Now, please say you’ll let me do your hair,” she begged.

  “I can do my own hair, Em,” I sighed.

  “I know, but,” she tapped her chin a few times before continuing, “you don’t always highlight your best features. There are going to be guys there,” she huffed.

  “I don’t need help meeting someone,” I rolled my eyes. “Tell ya what,” I paused, knowing I was going to regret this, but the little voice in the back of my head was screaming at me louder than it had in months. “I’ll get ready. If you don’t approve, then you can make me change. Deal?”

  “Fine,” she pushed her hair out of her face.

  I laughed as I grabbed a pair of black skinny jeans, and my hair and makeup bag. I draped the red top over my shoulder as I took my items down to the community bathroom. I needed time and space if I was going to pull one over on Em.

  It took me awhile to get ready. I’d pulled my hair up on top of my head and curled it. Each curl was pinned strategically to look like it was thrown together in a hurry. I pulled a few stray pieces down around my face and neck to soften it. After creating a dark smoky eye, I swiped on some red lipstick. I smacked my lips together before running some clear gloss over them so they’d shine. I appraised myself in the mirror before heading back to our room. I looked hot, that was a fact, and nothing like the Mel that attended Eastman. This Mel hadn’t been let out in two years, and I needed to remind myself that I had to keep her in check. If I didn’t, all the hard work I’d put in since starting here would have been for nothing.

  “Whoa!” Emma stood with her mouth open as I slipped the ID she’d given me in my wristlet, along with some cash and my phone.

  “What?” I turned to face her. The red top rose slightly, showing off an inch or so of skin at my midriff.

  “Who are you, and where is my roommate?” her eyes scanned me from head to toe.

  “Very funny. So I’m guessing you approve of my choices?” I laughed as I reached for a pair of black ankle boots. I tugged them on and stood up straight, brushing my hands down the front of me.

  “You look… I don’t even know. Let’s take a selfie,” she bounced over and wrapped her arm around my shoulder, holding her phone in the other hand. We smiled as it clicked before she clicked a few buttons, and then put it in her pocket. “Ready?”

  “Yeah. Are we walking, or are you driving?” I reached for the door and heaved it open.

  “I’m driving. It’s like a fifteen-minute drive to the bar,” she waved her hand in the air as I followed behind her, and outside.

  “Oh yeah? What’s the name of it?” I was almost running to keep up with her.

  Once we were in her car and buckled, she cranked it and pulled out. As we made our way down the street she finally told me. “It’s this cool place Brock and I found called ‘Shakers’.”

  “We cannot go there, Em,” I began to panic. I hadn’t been to Shakers in years. I hadn’t wanted to after the night I’d had there with Jason. I’d stayed away for a reason, and now I was being forced to go back. My present was running head first into my past, and I was powerless to stop it.

  “Why?” Emma’s forehead crinkled as she made the final turn into the parking lot of the bar. “Have you been here before?”

  “No, well once. It was a long time ago,” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “I didn’t have a very good time,” I groaned.

  “Tonight will be different,” Emma giggled as she cut the engine. “I promise,” she reached over and squeezed my hand. “Just give it a chance. Trust me.”

  How was it supposed to be different? Here I was dressed and painted up like the old me at a bar where I let my boyfriend take advantage of my naivety, and she wanted me to trust her. Hell, I didn’t even trust myself at this point.

  Chapter 6

  Melinda

  The music was pounding when we stepped through the doors at Shakers. It was packed, and as I read the drink special above the bar I could tell why. All drinks, one dollar.

  “Are they for real?” I flicked my hand at the sign.

  “Told you it was a good deal,” Em laughed as we weaved our way through the crowd.

  The dance floor was packed, and there was a band tonight. “Who’s ready to get drunk tonight?” the lead singer shouted into the mic, causing the entire room to begin hooting and hollering. “That’s good because my man, Mark, at the bar will set you up, and if you’re real good ladies, I’ll show you my truck later,” he winked before turning to nod to the drummer who began hitting his sticks together. Soon, music blared through the speakers, making it difficult to talk.

  “Let’s get a drink and then get our groove on!” Em shouted in my ear. I nodded and followed her to the bar.

  Em ordered some pink fruity looking thing, but I stuck to my usual rum and Coke. I rarely ever drank nowadays, and when I did it was never something new. I liked to stick with what I knew I could handle. My eyes went wide when I watched the bartender flip the bottle upright. The clear liquid seemed to run continuously, making me wonder how many I’d be able to have before calling it quits tonight.

  “Let’s dance,” I pointed to dance floor after we paid.

>   Em and I sipped our drinks as we moved to the music. It was crowded and the smoke machine that was running in the corner made it hard to see. I was sure after a few hours that I was going to look like a hot mess. Sweat was already starting to bead across my body, and the alcohol was making it worse. Anytime I drank I ran a little hot.

  “Are you having fun?” Em laughed as a drunken smile spread across her face. We’d had a few at this point. I bobbed my head before tipping it back and finishing my current drink. “Are you glad you came?” her smile spread farther. If she smiled any bigger I was afraid she might get a cramp in her face.

  “Sure,” I laughed. “How many of those have you had, Em?”

  She shrugged, “Not sure.”

  “Maybe you should slow down. You drove,” I pointed out.

  “Not worried about that,” her eyes widened. “Hey don’t be mad, ok?” she stopped dancing and stared at me. “Remember how much fun you’re having,” she leaned closer and I thought she was going to hug me. Her eyes darted over my shoulder right when I heard his voice.

  “You look so hot right now,” came as a growl right beside my ear.

  I froze before narrowing my eyes and turning to glare at him. “What the hell are you doing here?”

  “Em invited me,” Aaron shrugged before Brock stepped out from behind him.

  “Correction,” Brock chuckled. “Em invited me,” he pointed to his chest. “You invited yourself,” he shoved Aaron’s shoulder before moving over to Emma and wrapping his arms around her. “Thanks for the photo. I’m glad I came,” he nuzzled her neck, making both Aaron and I gag.