Defiant Surrender

by Tamara Gill

  “So they fought over land and then decided to betroth their children to each other. That doesn’t make any sense. Why would they do such a thing if they hated each other?” Maddie watched as her maid found her slippered feet fascinating all of a sudden and she wondered what she wasn’t being told of the story.

  “The king put a stop to the war. He would not condone any further bloodshed between two Norman families. If his Highness lost the feudal services of these two great families, it could have put his own safety in jeopardy, should he need their help. It could not continue any longer.”

  “So the king arrived and stopped the war, by whatever means. Then, in a deranged attempt to keep his barons from further fighting, he thought to betroth the children to one another?” Maddie said with sarcasm. “Was he mad?” Her maid’s eyes widened as she stole a look over her shoulder.

  “M’lady Madeline, remember who and where you are. The king’s decree is not something any would oppose. Do not jest so aloud. The king threatened war upon Kingston and Aimecourt should the marriage not take place. Your father, a confidant of the king, would never go against his wishes. However, the late Baron of Kingston was furious and held a deep grudge against your father until his death.”

  “Do you think this is why William dislikes me so?” A peculiar amused look passed over her maid’s face. Maddie thought back over her question and frowned, having not thought it funny.

  “His Lordship grew up full of hate and loathing of the Baron of Aimecourt and any beneath his rule and care,” Mistress Rhode answered, her voice weary.

  “Perhaps it would be easier between us should I give Lord William the land they wanted all those years ago. You said yourself you believed it to be over boundaries,” Maddie said, watching her maid closely and not missing her servant’s pale countenance.

  “Many years have passed, child. Leave it be. I’m sure in time His Lordship and yourself will get along well enough.”

  Maddie caught the guilty line of her maid’s face but let it go. What was she hiding? And she was not the only one hiding something. But what? Did William know? Of course he would. With a father who never kept silent over his dislike of the Baron of Aimecourt, how could he not? Maddie wiped away a snowflake as it landed on her cheek, and stepped toward a door leading into the castle.

  “Shall we return? It’s getting cold.”

  “Yes, m’lady, let’s.”

  *

  Later that day Maddie stood looking down a snow-covered road. One they were soon to travel. Somewhere over those hills, between Aimecourt and the church, lay her ring. Surely it did. It had to, for it certainly wasn’t anywhere within the castle. Between Mistress Rhode and herself, they had rummaged through every square inch of the place. Including the carriage in which she had landed those many weeks ago. She pulled her cloak closer as a chill ran down her spine.

  “Lady Madeline, the carriage is ready. If you will, we should make haste before it grows too late and we’re unable to continue our search.”

  Maddie turned away and walked toward her maid. “Was anyone able to locate and inform Lord William of our plans?”

  “Nay, m’lady, but I have notified your steward and asked him to pass on the message as soon as His Lordship returns.”

  “Thank you.” Maddie hastened down the stairs. She hadn’t seen William since the night of the winter solstice. She knew he had ridden out yesterday with thirty armed men, but as yet, had not returned. All Sir Alex had said, when she enquired as to the purpose of their journey, was it was nothing of concern. Maddie tried not to worry, knowing William was a seasoned warrior and could take care of himself.

  However, these times were far from safe. War, death, and famine were a part of everyday life. Even if the journey were only between family estates, the miles left any open to assault. There was no doubt William could be obnoxious and domineering, but lately he had shown another side of himself. One she could grow to like very much, given enough time and if she was fool enough to do so. No matter what was between them, she wished no harm to befall him.

  It took one hour to reach the spot where Mistress Rhode believed Maddie had fallen onto the floor after hitting the rut in the road. Stepping from the carriage, they searched for the missing jewellery. Sir Alex and their coachman even braved the winter chill to look for her missing ring, before the snow became too heavy. They walked, searched the road longer than advisable in such conditions, but without luck. It seemed pointless to have even tried, like searching for a needle in a haystack.

  Maddie stood next to the carriage and turned as the sound of approaching horses thundered in the distance. She looked to Sir Alex, whose attention was fixed on a group of men cantering up the road. A prick of alarm shot through her when he tensed and became alert. He came to stand before her, silent and watchful. Maddie stood on her toes and tried to see over his broad shoulders. Hoped against hope she would live to see another day, even if in 1102. She sighed in relief, as none other than her husband, led the party that bore down on them.

  Maddie smiled and stepped around Sir Alex, then stopped. The riders who accompanied her husband, were male—all but one. She should have known William’s inability to live without his whore wouldn’t last. Maddie had an overwhelming urge to smack the condescending smirk of Lady Veronica’s face. She swallowed, hating the absurd crush upon her chest. It wasn’t like she didn’t know of his mistress. He’d never taken the care to hide that from her. So why did the sight of them together make her want to vomit.

  At least it explained where he had been these last two days. She pushed away her stupid feminine hurts and let anger coil in her gut. William dismounted and strode toward her, his face a mask of cool indifference. Maddie lifted her chin and watched him, his large woolen cloak making his broad shoulders seem even larger. He grasped her arm and she wrenched free, the thought of him touching her made her skin crawl.

  William glared at Sir Alex. “What’s the meaning behind you having Lady Madeline out in this weather?”

  “It was my choice, my lord. I lost something on the day of our wedding, and I was trying to find it,” Maddie said.

  After a few tense-filled moments, William glanced at her. “What is it you’ve lost, Madeline?” he asked.

  “It doesn’t matter. It’s not here.” She walked over to the carriage and opened the door, only to have it slammed again by her husband.

  “Madeline, you are angry with me.” His gaze searched her face. “Why?”

  Maddie looked out toward the open fields and forest that lay beyond the road. What was this emotion she was feeling? Some form of annoyance, or the worse and more telling emotion of jealousy. She shook her head. No. She wouldn’t be jealous of Lady Veronica. Not ever.

  “In the future, please advise me when you sojourn off into the sunset with your mistress. Unless, of course, you do this so I look incompetent to my people. I don’t like to ask after my husband only to be informed he has left.”

  His deep, rumbling chuckle was the opposite response to what she expected. Her stomach flipped as he ran a finger down her check and then tweaked her chin.

  “My humble apologies, my lady,” William said, bowing. “But the matter was urgent and needed my immediate attention.”

  Or Lady Veronica needed urgent attending.

  “Lady Veronica has come to stay, Madeline. There have been reports of the king’s enemies roaming these parts, murder and mayhem their only goal. We are Norman, all our homes and lives are at risk. I could not leave her at Kingston castle unprotected.” William folded his arms over his chest and Maddie noted he wore chainmail. Her mouth dried seeing him dressed as a soldier for the first time. If anything, his armor made him even hotter. Not that he’d ever hear those words from her.

  “There have been no such reports received at Aimecourt, my lord. I think you must think me a simpleton who is unable to glean your true purpose.”

  “I do not do this to hurt you, Madeline.”

  “Whatever,” she said as she turned a
nd stepped into her carriage. She could understand him needing to keep his people safe, but surely the Lady Veronica could have been taken anywhere other than her home. Perhaps back to her own family in London, from where she apparently hailed. Or to her brother’s, Lord Ribald of Castle Dee.

  Her stomach rolled with nausea. She didn’t want that conniving, nasty woman to live within her walls. Whenever she saw her, she always had an overwhelming urge to scratch the woman’s eyes out. Veronica was obviously happy to be back within arm’s reach of William, knew that her presence within Aimecourt would make Maddie look the fool to her people.

  “There is nothing left to say between us.” The coach lurched as her maid settled into the seat across from her. “Please step away, so I may proceed home,” she said, as she looked back to her husband who stood silent beside the door. She leant over and slammed the door shut and tried to ignore the simmering fury that blazed from his eyes.

  Why should he be angry? It was she who had the right to be furious. How dare he bring Lady Veronica into her home, especially when she had said no to such a situation? They may have been on their way to being friends, but that was well and truly over now. Perhaps in time their friendship could have progressed into something deeper. Who knew? But not now, not after his actions this day. She would not allow him to sway her with his fake words and easy charm. He’d be lucky if she showed civility toward him again. Be damned if she would welcome that whore into her home with open arms. Damned indeed.

  *

  The great hall bustled with knights, ladies and servants as the evening meal began. Freshly laid rushes that smelt of herbs and spices crackled beneath Maddie’s slippered feet. The peat fire lent a muddy smell to the room. Oddly, it reminded her of home, the atmosphere welcoming. Turning toward the dais, she stopped as she took in the seating arrangements.

  Maddie pulled forth all the authority a lady of the manor would have, determined to sit at her allotted station. She straightened her back and walked toward William and Lady Veronica who seemed deep in conversation. An overwhelming urge to throw Veronica to the floor assailed her and Maddie took a calming breath. She would not make a scene, nor let Lady Veronica get the better of her. The room quieted as others watched, noted her presence. She hated William at that moment. How could he allow such a slight against his wife? A wife he knew damn well hated his mistress.

  Maddie came to stand beside her seat. Lady Veronica continued to converse with William making it plainly obvious she was being ignored. Heat coursed up her neck. Not one to fight, Maddie would have preferred to slink away and disappear, let them have each other and be done with it. However, this was her home; this was the Lady Madeline’s home, not theirs. Maddie owned this grand estate and she would sit on the chair allotted to her by right of birth. Even if she was acting as a standin mistress at present.

  She looked over the tables and caught the inquisitive, worried glances of her servants. About to physically remove Veronica herself, she heard her husband hiss at Her Ladyship, which ensured Veronica’s departure. Maddie met the whore’s laughing gaze as she stepped away, her own eyes hard. It took all her will not to trip her as she walked past. Really, that woman was going to go down, and hopefully by her hand.

  Maddie sat, ignored her husband’s welcome and gestured to the servants to proceed serving the main meal.

  “Madeline, you must understand it was imperative for me to bring Lady Veronica here. I received word from my steward that a Scottish war party was roaming the area. ’Twould have been wrong of me to allow Lady Veronica to stay within a keep still under construction and not as well fortified as Aimecourt.”

  Maddie refused to be turned by the common sense her husband spoke. She regarded him over the rim of her cup as she took a sip of wine.

  “You forget I do not care what happens to Lady Veronica, my lord. She is nothing to me and never will be. Never have I known a more callous, spiteful, and devious woman. I will not make her welcome here or treat her kindly; she has never shown me such a courtesy. And as soon as the trouble abates, I want her gone and you with her. I have written to the king requesting the termination of our marriage. I hope in time we may both be able to move on in our lives to futures we both want and desire.” Maddie held her husband’s furious gaze and refused to cower.

  “Maybe,” she continued, “you could make an honest woman of her.” If that was even possible. Maddie scooped some chicken broth up with the ladle provided. An ache settled in her chest at the thought of William and Lady Veronica married.

  Maddie could feel William’s anger as he stared at her. Well, he should not think her all puff and no wind. She did have the nerve. And to prove her point, she had followed through on her threat—she’d sent the messenger off this morning with her letter to King Henry. She would not repent. No longer would she be stepped on.

  “I thought…” he paused. “’Twas my understanding that we were gaining a friendship, one I had hoped may become more in time. Perhaps prosper into a marriage of the truest sense,” he said.

  Maddie turned away from him, not wanting him to see her own conflicted thoughts and feelings on the subject. She frowned as confusion swamped her. For whatever reason, she was stuck in this time, and to survive one had to make the best of the circumstances in which one found oneself. But what was the point of William and herself? They never seemed to get along. Every opportunity he had, he ran back to his mistress. He’d slept with the woman on their wedding day, for God’s sake. It didn’t matter what the reason; it didn’t change the fact it had happened. No matter what he said or felt toward her now, he had an obligation to Lady Veronica, one he needed to recognize and honor. Lady Veronica’s venom toward her was solely because she saw her as competition. And perhaps if Maddie placed herself within Lady Veronica’s shoes, she would do the same.

  No, on second thought, she couldn’t agree wholly with that. Had a man up and married someone else, while dating her, she would have hightailed as far away as possible from the situation. Nevertheless, perhaps she should stop being so callous and nasty to Veronica. It wasn’t as if any of this was Her Ladyship’s fault. And it wasn’t in her nature to be catty, scratching and hissing at everyone every minute of every day. She took a sip of her wine and slumped back in her chair.

  “You and your kin will always be welcome in time of need within Aimecourt, Lord William, including Lady Veronica. Who in time no doubt will become your wife. The king may have forced us into this marriage, but it would seem we have the power to end it. Do not live your life doing what everyone else thinks is right for you. We are not matched well, and that’s the end of it. Our parents and the king were wrong. It is neither of our faults. I’m only sorry you have wasted these weeks when your life could have been spent more pleasantly elsewhere.” Maddie tried to keep the spite out of her voice, but it was not easy. The thought of William back in Veronica’s bed maddened her. And it shouldn’t. She should be happy he stayed away from her, stopped looking at her as if contemplating something that made her insides quiver.

  “I’m married to you. I made a vow to you, Madeline. I do not back away from my obligations, whatever they are. What is blessed by God cannot be undone.”

  “Well, I’m sorry for you, then, because I refuse to be married to a man who sees me as an obligation. We both deserve more,” Maddie stated, lowering her voice as others about the hall looked their way.

  “It is too late, Madeline. What is done cannot be undone. No letter to our sovereign will change that.” William paused when she stood. “Madeline, ’twould be unwise for you to leave this table, if that is your plan. You will finish this discussion, and you will finish it…now!”

  Maddie held his maddened stare as she stepped away from her chair. She pushed down the lump which formed in her throat as she strode from the great hall. How could she start a relationship with William? The year 1102 wasn’t her time. And this wasn’t her life to live. Perhaps she was stuck married to William, but that didn’t mean she would allow it to become
marriage in truth. It may not be what she wanted to do in her heart, but it was for the best, Lord William was not for her—ever. She stumbled to the stairs as her vision blurred under the multitude of tears.

  “M’lady, what is wrong?”

  Maddie allowed her maid to usher her upstairs. “Nothing. Mistress Rhode, that the twenty-first century couldn’t fix,” Maddie said, with a self-deprecating smile.

  “Come, m’lady I will put you to bed and make a tisane.”

  “No,” Maddie said, a little too quickly, a shudder of revulsion running though her at the memory of the last tisane. “I just need some sleep. Do not trouble yourself.”

  Her maid studied her face at her chamber door then conceded. “Perhaps I could sit with you for a time,” Mistress Rhode ventured.

  Maddie sat on a stool before the hearth. “I’ll be fine, really,” she answered brightening her features to place more believability behind her words. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

  Her maid protested but eventually departed. Maddie looked back to the fire. The heat of the flames soon dried the tears, but couldn’t warm her heart. Her decision was for the best. And perhaps is she kept repeating such words, eventually she would believe them as well.

  *

  William swore as he watched Madeline walk from the hall. What was the woman thinking? He glanced at the empty seat beside him and rubbed his jaw. Such a troublesome wench, to have written the king. But then, he wasn’t overly concerned that she had. The king would not want such a powerful Norman family alliance to come apart. Kingston’s and Aimecourt’s joined forces, were too powerful an ally to lose. The king may sympathize with Madeline over her situation, but he would not allow an annulment of the marriage to take place. At least, that was what William was counting on.

  “Lady trouble, m’lord?”

  William laughed then groaned at Sir Alex beside him. “Maddening wench. She is too proud, like her father, to see reason.”