Bad Appetites: A Body Horror Novel

by Jon Athan

  Blushing, Cindy said, “Sorry. I should have been watching where I was going. I guess I was a little dizzy.”

  The man smiled and said, “Don't worry about it. It was my fault. I should have been more careful. I'll get out of your hair. I don't want to bother you while you exercise. Have a nice day.”

  Before he could walk away, Cindy said, “My name is Cindy. What... What's yours? I mean, if you don't mind me asking.”

  The man stopped and glanced over his shoulder, astonished by the woman's persistence. She had more confidence than he had anticipated. He smiled as he glided his eyes over her body, scanning her from head-to-toe. He wasn't leering, he wasn't a pervert, but he was blatantly staring. He rubbed the nape of his neck as he approached.

  He said, “It's nice to meet you, Cindy. My name is Hideki. You can call me 'Doctor Deki,' though. Or just 'Deki.' Whichever one is easier for you. I wouldn't want to make it hard for you.”

  Cindy leaned on the stationary bike. She narrowed her eyes and smirked as she said, “Hideki... Doctor Deki... Are you really a doctor? Or is that some sort of pick-up line?”

  “I suppose it's a little of both.”

  “Oh, really? Well, what are you a doctor of? What do you practice exactly, Dr. Deki?”

  Deki huffed and bit his bottom lip as he walked closer to Cindy. Stunned by the arrogant approach, Cindy leaned back on the bike and nervously giggled. The couple stood less than a foot away from each other. The young man leaned forward, as if he were moving in for a kiss.

  He stopped near her ear and said, “I make people beautiful. I don't operate, but I have my ways.” He caressed her cheek and said, “You know, you'd be absolutely gorgeous – stunning – if you lost some weight.”

  Cindy tilted her head and glared at the man. She asked, “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I meant, I can see your true potential through all of your sweat and tears. You are a beautiful woman, Cindy, and you're only going to get better over time. I know that for a fact.”

  Feeling his breath on her lips and chin, Cindy shuddered and asked, “R–Really? And, how do you know that?”

  “Well, I know we just met, but I have a little offer for you... if you're interested. You see, I manufacture and distribute special capsules that will help you lose an enormous amount of weight without exercising or dieting. In fact, if you use these capsules, it would be better if you ate as much as possible. These things eat fat faster than you can possibly imagine. It will really eat into you if you're not careful, but it will get the job done.”

  Cindy cocked her head back like a walking pigeon. She asked, “Are you kidding me?”

  Deki slowly shook his head and said, “No. This is a serious offer. I wouldn't be offering it to you if it wasn't.”

  Cindy slinked away from Deki and the bike, sidestepping out of the corner she had inadvertently placed herself into. She stared at the young man with a furrowed brow, baffled by his strange approach. His intentions were difficult to decipher, as if she were listening to an extinct language for the first time. He didn't seem malevolent on the surface, but the entire situation was suspicious.

  Miracle weight-loss capsules, she thought, I've never heard that one before.

  Cindy said, “Okay, so, you sell capsules. Am I supposed to be impressed? Are you just some shady salesman? I mean, you're not really selling them to me, Deki. I don't understand what you're trying to do to me. Like, are you trying to seduce me or something?”

  Deki smiled and said, “No, no. I wish I could, especially after you try these capsules, but I don't mix business with pleasure. I want to help you. I obviously want to make a sale, but I'm more concerned with helping you right now.”

  “Well, that's great and all, but, like I said, you're not really selling them to me. What kind of capsules are we talking here? What do they do? How much do they cost?”

  Hook, line, and sinker.

  Deki smiled smugly as he watched Cindy with narrowed eyes. Judging from her questions, he knew he captured her attention. He threw the bait and she bit the line. He only had to reel her in and finish the sale.

  Deki explained, “In layman's terms, they're diet capsules. These capsules will eat your fat. I guess it is fairly close to literal, in this case. It will start off slow, but it will accelerate over time. Trust me on that. It's important to only take two capsules per week until you balance your 'diet,' too. Remember, you don't have to watch your calories, but you should be eating a lot.”

  Cindy said, “That sounds counter-productive to me. I've never heard of eating to lose weight.”

  “It's for your own safety, Cindy. Like I said, it eats your fat. When there's no more fat to eat, it might move on to everything else. And, when it moves on, your body and your mind are going to force you to adapt. That means you'll be convinced into eating things you've never thought about before. You'll develop bad appetites. You understand me? Eat until your losing weight at a comfortable rate. I can't stress than enough.”

  “Okay, okay... And, how much does it cost? Hmm? How much am I paying for these 'miracle' capsules?”

  Deki retrieved an orange prescription bottle from his pocket – one of many. He pushed down on the top, then he twisted the cap until the bottle was opened. He leaned closer to Cindy and showed her the capsules. The container held 30 size-1 capsules, each capsule approximately two centimeters in size. Half of the capsule was white, the other half was blood-red.

  As he closed the bottle, Deki said, “It's $1,000 for a 30-capsule prescription. I don't sell them individually.”

  Cindy chuckled and shook her head, flabbergasted by the high price. She said, “That... That's insane. That's like $30 per capsule. Holy shit. Do you really expect me to pay for something without any proof? Huh?”

  “Look, I usually sell these to severely obese people. I'm talking 500 pounds and up. You won't need all of these capsules, but I can't break my policy. It doesn't work that way. Besides, you don't look like the type of woman who needs proof. No, you're looking for a miracle and I have that for you. I have it for you in a neat little bottle. Give it four weeks, eight capsules, and you'll lose all of that fat. Then, if you'd like, you can sell the rest or save them. Remember, this is not a permanent solution, so it's your responsibility to keep that weight off.”

  “You talk like you've already sold them to me.”

  “That's because I did. I can see it in your eyes.”

  Cindy grimaced as she stared down at herself in shame. She was weak and manipulable – see-through like an arrogant politician. Indeed, Deki was a master salesman. He sold dreams through his charisma and used insecurities to manipulate his potential customers. The couple were meant for each other.

  The troubled woman was genuinely interested in the 'miracle' capsules, even when it sounded too good to be true. She spent four years trying to lose weight – and she only gained more weight in the process. So, she didn't mind risking four weeks with the dietary supplement. From the outside looking in, she may have appeared foolish, but she was simply desperate, depressed, and naive.

  She asked, “How do I know you won't scam me? Huh? Why should I trust you, a stranger, with something so expensive?”

  Deki puckered his lips and nodded. He said, “I like you, Cindy, so I think we can work something out.”

  “Like what?”

  “Well, for one, you can pay half today and half when you see results. So, I'd say you can pay the rest in a week or two. That's a good deal, trust me. Second, I'll give you my personal number so you can call me any time. And, lastly, you can trust me because I work here.”

  As Deki smiled from ear-to-ear, Cindy furrowed her brow and tilted her head in utter confusion. She asked, “You work here? Really?”

  Deki retrieved an employee ID badge from his pocket. The plastic card showed a picture of himself, his full name, a barcode, and the gym's logo. Under his name, a line read: Personal trainer. Cindy glanced at the man standin
g at the front of the desk – he wore an identical badge around his neck. Deki's story checked out.

  Cindy said, “I see... I thought you looked familiar.”

  “You can trust me. I'm only trying to help you out. Yeah, it's an expensive supplement, but it is effective. It's not like that other shit you find in those pyramid schemes. This is the real deal. What do you say, Cindy? Are you ready to lose that weight? Are you ready to find your true beauty?”

  Cindy stared into Deki's glowing eyes. He was obviously more interested in the money, but he seemed sincere about the capsule's abilities. The young woman was tempted by the offer. She looked down at her stomach, counting the ripples on her sweater. She wanted to get rid of the rolls of fat, she wanted to be skinny like the models on television.

  With moist puppy eyes and a quivering lip, Cindy glanced back at Deki and said, “You have a deal. I just need to go to the bank next door and withdraw some money.” Tears of joy streaming down her cheeks, she nodded and said, “We have a deal, Deki, we have a deal...”

  Deki smirked and said, “Fantastic. You won't regret this. You go get the money and I'll write down some instructions and tips for you.”

  “Okay, okay. Thank you for this. If you're the real deal, if you can really save me, I'm going to owe you much more than $500. Thank you...”

  Chapter Six

  The Miracle Capsule

  Cindy sat in the passenger seat of the pick-up truck, absently staring at her decrepit apartment building. She was lost in her thoughts, ruminating about her monotonous life. She found herself parked in the same place, waiting for her boyfriend to say goodbye, and hoping she wouldn't be seen. The routine was regular after a date.

  Joseph coughed to disrupt the silence, then he said, “The food was good, right? I told you it would be good to try some seafood. It fills you up and it's not too fat. It's good for your diet, isn't it?” Cindy pouted as she stared out her window and casually grunted – sure. Joseph sighed, then he asked, “What's wrong, Cindy? Talk to me, babe. Don't push me away. You know I always come back. Come on, tell me something.”

  Cindy sighed and glanced at Joseph. From the glimmer in his eyes to the creases on his face, she could see he was genuinely concerned. The young man didn't mind her snobby attitude, but he worried greatly about her well-being – particularly, he was concerned about her mental health. Of course, he wouldn't blatantly question her. Questioning the sanity of a person on the verge of breaking down would only accelerate the process.

  Cindy swallowed the lump in her throat, then she asked, “What do you think about me losing weight? Hmm? How would you feel if I lost all of... all of this disgusting fat?”

  Joseph shrugged and said, “It's not disgusting. Besides, I don't really think it would make a difference. As long as you're not dying, I think you're fine. I think you're perfect the way you are, Cin. I wouldn't change anything about you.”

  “Don't say that.”

  “What?”

  “Don't call me 'perfect.' You know I'm not perfect. I'm a slob. I'm a fat, disgusting slob. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror. Shit, I have to shower with my eyes closed so I don't see myself. I'm not perfect. I'm not like those girls on TV. I'm not like those 'plus-sized' Instagram models. Those beautiful girls with curves in the right places... I'm just not like them.”

  Joseph caressed Cindy's cheek and said, “You're perfect to me. I don't care about anything else. Okay? I only care about you and how you feel. You could look the same way for the rest of your life and I'd still love you. You're perfect.”

  Despite the tears coursing across her cheeks, Cindy smiled and nodded. Joseph may not have been as fit and attractive as Deki, but he was equally charming. Like his stomach, his heart was large and gentle. He knew how to woo a woman with his words, he knew how to comfort a friend through sincerity.

  Cindy wiped the tears from her eyes and said, “Thank you, Joe. Thank you for everything. You're... You're really something special. I'm a lucky girl.” She stroked the nape of his neck as she kissed him, then she leaned back in her seat – giddy like a teen flirting with her crush. She glanced at her bag and said, “I'm still curious, though. How would you feel if I lost weight? Like, what if the fat could be gone in four weeks?”

  Joseph furrowed his brow and asked, “How much weight are we talking here? Four weeks is a little fast, isn't it?”

  “I thought so, too. Just humor me, though. Imagine I lost all of my fat – all of it – in four weeks. What do you think about that?”

  “Well, first, I'd ask how the hell you did something like that. Then, I'd kiss you and move on. I'd love you just the same. Then, I'd probably ask you again: how the hell did you lose that weight? Black magic?”

  As Joseph chuckled, Cindy said, “Well, you can lose plenty of weight through surgery and, I don't know, capsules. I think it's possible.”

  Joseph stopped his obnoxious cackle. The smile was wiped from his face and the joy was vacuumed from his body. The interior of the truck remained silent as the pair stared at each other. Joseph was serious, Cindy was anxious.

  Joseph huffed and shook his head, then he said, “Listen, Cindy, I love you and I'm going to have your back forever. I'm always going to support you. I just don't want you to get your hopes up for nothing. Surgery is very risky and expensive. Believe me, I've checked. And, diet pills and crap like that doesn't work. I mean, if capsules could really burn fat, everyone would be using them. They're usually scams – dangerous scams.”

  Cindy despondently stared at her lap, disappointed in the brutally honest response. At heart, she felt the same skepticism about the capsules.

  Joseph sighed, then he said, “I'll support you in anything you do. Don't forget that. If you want to try some pills or supplements, I'll be by your side. If you want to look into surgery, I'll help you pay. As long as you're safe, healthy, and comfortable, I'll back you up. Okay?”

  Cindy licked her lips and nodded. She was relieved by her boyfriend's trust and understanding. She couldn't tell him about the 'miracle' capsules, though. The capsules weren't approved by a federal agency. The results and her safety were not guaranteed. She also spent $500 on the capsules. If they didn't work, she would never live it down around Joseph and her friends.

  Burying the truth deep in her soul, Cindy said, “I'm going to continue exercising and dieting, but I want to look into some other options. I'm just curious, I guess. But, I'll keep doing what I'm doing. I'll keep working on it.”

  “Attagirl. That's all I'm saying. Take your time, do some research, be careful. That's all I want, babe,” Joseph said as he smiled from ear-to-ear. He rubbed Cindy's bicep and said, “Look at these muscles, too. Shit, you look like you can kill someone with your bare hands. The gym is going well for you. Just don't get too ripped, Cin. I don't want you to hurt me.”

  Cindy rolled her eyes, smiling and giggling. She said, “Whatever. I'm going to head inside already. I'm tired. I'll call you tomorrow.”

  Cindy and Joseph shared another kiss. Cindy waved at her boyfriend as she walked towards the apartment building. She stopped at the foyer and waited until Joseph drove off. As soon as the truck vanished with the darkness, the young woman frowned and shook her head. She faked her happiness to keep her friends happy – a noble sacrifice.

  ***

  Does a person's depression stain the environment?

  Cindy despised her home. Every night, she would stand in the doorway and stare into her apartment. She always struggled to muster the courage to proceed. The cramped studio apartment was melancholic and lonesome, depressing on its own merits. Her home was the dark abyss of depression – the abyss she sought to escape.

  She flicked the switch on the adjacent wall and illuminated the kitchen, then she shut the front door. She tossed her bag on the kitchen counter, following her nightly routine without a hiccup. The night was different, though. She felt as if she were in a different kitchen in a different home.

  She stopped before she could reach f
or her orange juice. Instead, she opened her bag and retrieved the orange prescription bottle.

  As she examined the bottle, like an archaeologist examining an ancient artifact, Cindy whispered, “What can you really do for me? Hmm? Can you eat all of the fat on my body? Can you make me beautiful like everyone else? Or, will you just end up disappointing me like the rest of the world? Hell, you might even hurt me, right? I don't know where you've been. I don't even know your ingredients. What are you made out of?”

  The young woman placed the bottle on the counter near the sink, then she stepped in reverse. She glanced towards her left and peered into the bathroom. The bathroom was barely illuminated by the kitchen light, but she could see enough. She could see the plain wall – the area where the mirror previously resided.

  She bit her fingernails as she stared into the bathroom. Memories flooded every crevice of her brain, tormenting her with awful thoughts. She remembered smashing the mirror and contemplating suicide only a few nights prior. She feared if she did not lose weight, she would inevitably kill herself in the future.

  Teary-eyed, Cindy stared down at her bandaged hand and said, “No. It can't happen again. I can't let it end like that. If I... If I stay fat, I'll end up dead. I have to fight back, I have to do anything to get skinny. I have to do this.”

  She staggered towards the counter. She opened the bottle, then she gently shook a few capsules out of the container. Five capsules rolled onto the counter, waiting to be consumed. The vibrant red sides of the capsules were unusually captivating – glowing in the dark like a lion's eyes at night. Red was a beautiful color, attractive to the human eye. It was difficult to imagine the capsules could shred dozens of pounds.

  With her elbows on the counter, Cindy leaned closer to the capsules and said, “Okay. So, what are my options? Huh? What can I do? I can keep going to the gym without progress while eating food I don't like. I guess that's an option, right? I can try surgery, which might or might not work, but it will put me in debt no matter what. That's an option, sure. Or, I could take these capsules. They might not work. They might kill me. They might save my life.”