Bright Morning Star

by J. R. Biery

  After Mrs. Switzer assigned everyone a place, she directed them to carry and fill a plate, with orders for the children to go first.

  The same maid who had freshened the beds and shown them to their rooms, stood patiently answering questions and helping the children. There was plain meat, cold mutton, neatly sliced. There were an array of vegetable dishes, stewed or pickled, but all familiar. There was some thin sliced, hard brown bread which the girl offered to spread with soft cheese or butter for the three older children. There was a hot dish of cabbage rolls. Bella managed a small plate and filled it carefully for Barney.

  Claire smiled at Bonnie at the strange way of serving guests, but both eagerly took their place in line. The food smelled good and tasted great. Bella’s mother had seated her daughter at her right, Mother Wimberley on her left and the girl’s and children beside her. The men and boys she seated at the opposite end, flanking her husband.

  Claire studied Bella’s parents. They did not look old, but they acted older than her own parents. They were cordial to Henry, but it was clear they did not know what to say to him. The same was true for little Barney.

  During dinner, Bella whispered to get her mother to look at her grandson. Barney sat listening in his mother’s lap, watching Mary Anne sing him a lullaby. When Mary would stop he would make little crooning sounds back to her. His eyes were shining with love and there was always a smile on his face. The women watching sat silently, until Bella’s mother reached out to touch him for the first time. Smiling through their tears, mother and daughter hugged.

  At the other end of the table, Bella’s Father and Henry were smiling at the women when Henry said something that made the man turn to stare at him.

  “What do you mean you sold the store? That was not in our agreement.”

  Bella’s mother stared at the man, her face as amazed as her husbands. Suddenly there was a loud and noisy argument. It was easy for Claire to see where Bella learned to yell and complain.

  The Wimberley’s stood hastily, and made their apologies before withdrawing for the night out to the wagons, leaving the family to work out their disagreements, urging the children outside with them. Claire and Bonnie crept upstairs. The argument was fierce now and little Barney, the only child present, was crying. Bonnie made a face at her, but Claire remained by the door, holding it open a crack so she could continue to listen.

  <><><>

  Her parents were furious that Bella sold the store without letting them know. Claire heard Bella’s mother yell. “We could have bought it back. You knew your father was struggling now that the bank has failed.”

  Claire felt her own body tremble when Bella didn’t answer. When Bella couldn’t defend herself, Henry took over.

  “It was just a matter of time before we lost the business. You don’t understand how difficult it is to run a store when the city’s commerce is shrinking all around you.”

  Now there was nothing but silence, which was worse than all the yelling. Slowly, Henry continued.

  “We’ve most of our stock in the wagons, and when we get out West, I expect we’ll be able to sell it all for a large profit. Then we can repay you.”

  For a moment, Claire leaned her head against the door frame. Oh lord, it sounded like… she didn’t let herself complete the thought, just turned to where Bonnie was standing in her petticoat, busy washing before bed. She wanted Bonnie to tell her what she thought it meant, but if the tall girl had heard, she didn’t react. Maybe it wasn’t important to her. As the Switzers continued to scream and yell, she tried not to hear all the mean things they were saying about Henry.

  As she heard the Lambtons storming out of the dining room, Claire quietly closed the door. Again, she looked at Bonnie, hoping for reassurance that she had misheard part of the conversation. Bonnie was humming a hymn to herself, in her big, vibrating voice. Claire stood with her hand on the cold glass of the doorknob behind her and prayed.

  <><><>

  Claire took her time at getting ready for bed, surprised at how good it felt to have the luxury of a big lamp like the blown painted globe one on the washstand. Bonnie had emptied and rinsed the bowl and the pitcher was still half-full of clean water. Such luxuries. There was also a large mirror and she tilted her head, trying not to feel vain at her own image. She was wringing out her washcloth when she heard the door next door slam. She watched the center of her own eyes grow blacker as for a minute there was silence.

  <><><>

  She had just climbed into bed beside her friend when they heard the angry whispers through the surprisingly thin walls.

  As soon as Bella joined Henry in their bedroom, their argument began in fierce, deadly whispers. “I just learned you didn’t do what you promised. You didn’t send my father part of the money we owe them. I insist we at least pay back half. That will leave each of us with the same amount of money, and our debt will be cut in half.”

  Henry said, “I don’t owe them. It wasn’t a loan, but your dowry that they gave us. We need that money. It’s a long way to Utah, and we’ve no idea what the expenses will be.”

  Bella’s voice wasn’t a whisper. “And if we’re robbed, then we won’t have the money and we’ll still owe all the debt. What will you say then?”

  He didn’t answer. They even heard the whoosh as he snuffed out the lamp. From the corner of the next room, they heard Barney whine. The angry silence was worse than hearing all the angry words.

  Claire trembled and tried to see Bonnie’s eyes in the dark. Bonnie must have sensed her staring for she muttered. “At least he didn’t hit her, Tarn would have split my lip if I’d raised my voice like that to him.”

  They heard a soft knock on the door and Bonnie called. “It’s open.”

  Mary Anne slipped in, running across the floor. She already had on her nightgown, and her shoes without socks. Claire heard the thud of the first shoe, waited for the other. Next door, they heard the boy cry and the sound of his mother getting up to tend to him. Claire raised the covers and let the small girl slip between them.

  Mary Anne took a few minutes to get settled, sighing with pleasure. “Wow, isn’t this heavenly.”

  <><><>

  Claire tried to relax and fall asleep. The mattress was soft and thick, the support underneath more than a few slats, since it did not sag under all their weight. Even with three in the bed, she didn’t feel crowded.

  There was only a glimmer of moonlight through the long window and its thick velvet drapes. She couldn’t see the furniture, guessed it was dark like the kitchen furniture, large, and heavily carved. Claire focused on a tiny strip of the wall-paper, the trail of vines with morning glories if she remembered right. In the dark, there was only a pattern of grays on white. She thought there were three colors of blooms, blue, violet, and rose. She tried to guess by the depth of gray, which flower was which color.

  Even as she heard the deep breathing of the two beside her, she made herself focus on the paper as one tear after another dripped off her cheeks onto the downy pillow. In the silence, she heard a door open and close. She couldn’t hear the footsteps, they were so soft.

  For one wild minute, she imagined another tap on the door. Bit her lower lip to keep from calling out come in. But the image of the handsome man slipping into the room and into her arms for comfort would not disappear. Claire eased out of the warm bed onto the cold floor. Kneeling, she raised her hands together and bowed her head, but she heard another door open down at the other end of the hall.

  Bella had slipped in to talk to her parents. Claire turned her beads and breathed her prayers.

  CHAPTER SIX

  The next morning they were ready to leave with the first light. They started with a cold breakfast of hard tack and goat cheese and were each glad to leave for their own reasons.

  Claire was tired at the beginning, but soon they were finally past the islands and onto the mainland of New York State on the long road west. The next planned stop was in Columbus, Ohio, where Bonnie hoped to catc
h up with her brothers. Young boys, too young for war, Ian and Shawn, were in basic training for the western war.

  Once again on the highway outside of the large town, they stopped while Bonnie rummaged through the food-stuffs to provide another cold meal. The ladies all headed as usual together toward the tree line.

  Now wide awake, Claire noticed that all the joy that had lit up Bella’s face the last couple of days was gone. She remembered every word she had overheard last night. Although she had tried to defend Henry in her mind, there was much that the woman had told him that she felt was right.

  Instinctively she reached out to take the hands of the little boy, while his mother relieved herself. “Your Mother looked so captured by your son last night.” She didn’t add, before the screaming match that followed.

  Bella stood and swung the little boy up into her arms to carry out of the trees before setting him down again to walk back to the wagon. “She told me last night that she was sorry. When the doctor’s diagnosed his condition as deteriorating and hopeless, she thought she was doing the right thing in sending him to the asylum.”

  Bonnie asked the hard questions, “You didn’t object?”

  Bella’s face darkened. Mother Wimberley moved closer to put a supporting arm around the woman. Claire expected Bella to start crying, she looked so hurt. Bella surprised them all when she raised her face and answered. “I was upset at the time. I had been told my son was going to die, there was no cure. In months, my beautiful baby would be twisted by pain and his little muscles would start to weaken,” her voice cracked.

  Claire stared at the sharp, bitter lines of the woman’s face, realizing again that Bella was not old. Like Bonnie, she had suffered too much. Bonnie stood behind her, waiting. Claire took another step closer as well. But Bella’s face went from sad to angry again.

  “Then my first husband abandoned me. He didn’t want to be burdened by either of us anymore. I was so despondent, when I was myself again, my parents had already placed Bernard in hospital. They told me it was so he would have the best of care. I felt so helpless. I believed there was nothing I could do to care for him.”

  She stared behind her, tears standing in her eyes for real. “Bonnie, I owe you so much.”

  The tall woman wrapped the small one in a big hug and Barney gave a squeal of alarm at being crushed between them. Laughing, calming the little boy, they separated.

  Father Wimberley called to the clutch of women, all surrounding the mother and child. “Everything all right? We need to get going.”

  All the women looked at the men. Claire didn’t see her father, but the man past his shoulder. A man she now resented, even though he wasn’t the husband who had forsaken Bella. She tried to think of something in his defense. Remembered Bonnie’s words from the night before. At least he never hit her, and they had overheard enough arguments between the couple to know that he was a far better man than most in that respect. He let his wife yell at him and nag without abusing her in return. But wasn’t ignoring her, keeping secrets from her, doing only what he wanted as bad? Claire had no answers.

  Bonnie rushed to pass out the meal of bread, cheese, and apples. In minutes they were underway.

  <><><>

  As Claire mounted the wagon, she was aware of Henry, standing and staring at his wife. He leaned forward to give her a hand up with the boy. Bella stared down at him from the seat, still not ready to forgive or forget his behavior of the night before. He looked curious, clearly wondering what the women had been talking about. He didn’t ask.

  As he turned to walk to the lead animal on their team and goad the animals into motion, Claire saw the sad lines of despair clearly etched on his face.

  Did he feel cut out of the group? Seeing others offer Bella sympathy, did he fear no one would speak to him now?

  <><><>

  Claire felt her stomach growl as Father began calling to the twins and Henry to move them off the road. To the right was a wooded tree line. As soon as possible, Claire climbed down. Then she reached back under the high bench seat for a bucket and sack.

  She might not spend the day walking and gathering wood for the fire, but she tried to help. On her way into the trees anyway, she always tried to find something to add to the fire or for Bonnie to use in cooking. And she didn’t want Bonnie to point out again that at least she could have brought a bucket of fresh water back.

  Usually she only found wild onions, strong for eating, but good when added to the pot of beans. As soon as the meal ended every day, Bonnie would move her pot of soaked beans over the cooling fire to give them a chance to cook a little. Claire didn’t want to think of another dinner that was mostly beans.

  For once, Claire was enjoying just walking about, listening to the birds, and the chattering squirrels in the tall trees. It was beautiful weather, the country peaceful. With luck, her father would find another fat farmer to buy fresh vegetables, eggs, and meat from. Although she had almost stopped minding the beans and bread. By the end of a long day, she was ready to eat her plateful of whatever Bonnie cooked.

  His voice startled her, “I don’t know why I thought this made sense. This trip will never end.”

  Claire stood still, staring up into Henry Lambton’s face. She was so startled, she couldn’t breathe. For the first time in a week, she would need to speak to Bella’s husband.

  “Are you talking to me?” she asked.

  He stared at her, his light eyes probing hers. He shook his head. “What would be the point? I’m invisible to you and everyone else on this trip.”

  With that, he moved around her into the woods. Standing still, holding her breath, Claire listened. In the distance she could hear his angry muttering. Rushing, she hurried back to the campfire, handing her onions to Bonnie and dropping her bundle of dried brush with what the others had gathered.

  “What’s wrong goose? You look like you’ve seen another snake,” Bonnie said.

  Claire raised her hands to her cheeks, looked around for the others. Her father and the twins were leading the cattle back from the stream. Bella and Mary Anne sat with Barney, who was trying to walk on his own around the two on the bench watching him.

  Claire reached out and grabbed Bonnie’s hand and drew her back behind the nearest wagon. “It’s Henry Lambton. He’s wandering around in the woods, talking to himself. He said he was invisible.”

  Bonnie stared at Claire, reaching out to touch her pale face. “He’s been getting stranger, ever since our visit to the Switzer’s. He didn’t harm you?”

  Claire shook her head, “No, he just frightened me.” Claire turned and looked back toward the fire. “It’s a shame he is so unhappy. Look, Bella now seems happier than him. Isn’t that strange.”

  “Part of married life. Someday you’ll understand,” Bonnie said.

  Claire shook her head. “I don’t want a marriage like that. Mother and Father don’t play those kinds of games.”

  Bonnie shrugged, “I never knew how to do it anyway, Tarn was always in charge.”

  <><><>

  That night Henry Lambton started complaining about Father Wimberley’s leadership and the rest of the voices around the campfire grew silent.

  Claire watched her Father’s face start to glow. Everyone sat up and listened at his sharp voice.

  “I realize it will take time, but we are saving the expense of train travel, three to five hundred per person to reach Utah. We are both saving a fortune in shipping costs since we’re each hauling a wagon full of goods to sell. Finally, I’ve put a lot of work and money into building these wagons. This is the most economical way to transport them west,” Father said.

  He stood up, glaring down at the younger man. “Henry, I explained all of this to you back in Boston. You don’t like it, go your own way. Otherwise, shut your yap and don’t bring it up again. I don’t care if we’re the only ones on the road, it makes it safer and faster for us to travel.”

  Without another word, he stomped off and Claire watched her mother sta
nd up to join him. Claire watched as Henry’s eyes looked around at the circle of children and young women. He rose and rushed Bella and the sleeping boy off to their wagon.

  As Claire crawled into bed, she managed to smile at the little girl who lay there waiting for her nighttime story. As soon as Claire finished reading, she blew out the candle and stared out through the flapping canvas. She could not remember her Father getting so upset at anyone. He meant it. Maybe she would never see the Lambton’s again. Troubled, she wondered if that would be good or bad. Softly she prayed, then relaxed.

  <><><>

  Claire was relieved to see Henry the next day walking alongside his wagon, without speaking to anyone, even his wife. The next day, when she saw him at breakfast, he smiled wryly at her. Claire tossed her blonde hair and said “Good morning, Henry.”

  Looking over, she noticed Bella standing at her wagon. The woman’s dark eyes grew brighter, like a hungry raven.

  Ignoring her look, Claire sat beside Henry, taking her plate from Bonnie and thanking her. Henry looked at Claire and waited. “Father says it’s going to rain.”

  “Yes, I think he’s right.” If he hadn’t sighed, the conversation would be like the ones they used to have. To keep from starting a fight with Bella, Claire spoke to her next as she sat, trying to position Barney so she could manage her plate and feed him too.

  “He looks happy this morning. I thought the rain bothered him,” Claire said in her normal voice.

  Bella stared at the girl, then smiled. “Sometimes, I guess he is better today. I’m glad we get to sit in the wagons.”

  Claire nodded, “Definitely, but it may just keep things cooled down.” Her Mother stood and walked over to assist Bella. She smiled at her daughter, then spoke to Henry. In minutes, the terrible tension of the last few days was gone. As though the group hadn’t been divided, everyone was back talking to each other.