Pandora Jones: Admission

by Barry Jonsberg

  ‘Why is a small group an advantage?’ asked Wei-Lin.

  ‘Survivors may not be friendly,’ Gwynne replied. ‘Maybe survivalists and therefore dangerous. Shoot first, ask questions later. Happened before. So small group means easier to hide.’ He sniffed again. ‘Probably safe, but we don’t take chances.’

  Gwynne allowed the silence that greeted his words to last for a few seconds. ‘Dawn when we arrive,’ he continued. ‘I leave you and come back in seventy-two hours. Exactly. You must wait for the boat. I won’t wait. Really important. You’re not there, you’ll be left. Clear?’

  Nate laughed. ‘Call this a good pastoral care program?’ he said. ‘If you’re late, you’re dead.’

  Gwynne didn’t even turn to face him. ‘We’ll come back with another group to find you. If you’re still alive. But takes time. So lesson’s simple. Don’t be late.’

  He moved to a long box, like a workman’s toolbox, that had also been under the tarpaulin. ‘In this box,’ he continued, ‘are basic survival tools. Compass, rope, axe, boning knife, full canteen of water and fishing equipment – line and hooks. Oh, and Wei-Lin – a longbow and arrows. So, weapons and a means of finding food. Identify a water source asap. Remember your training.’

  ‘Is that all we get?’ asked Jen.

  ‘That’s it,’ replied Gwynne. ‘I told you. A survival exercise. Locating survivors unlikely. Use your initiative. You’ll be fine.’

  He didn’t wait for a response, but moved to the boat’s stern and the engine’s whine increased and the boat picked up speed.

  The group was silent for a minute and then Nate laughed. ‘It’s better than cleaning out septic tanks,’ he said. ‘Which is what Pan and I faced back at The School. Whatya reckon, Pan?’

  ‘I’m not sure,’ she said. ‘Either way, we’re deep in the shit.’

  Nate laughed again. ‘Be positive, people,’ he said. ‘And get some shut-eye while the going’s good.’ He leaned back on the bench, crossed his ankles and shut his eyes. No one said anything.

  Too much has happened, thought Pan. And we haven’t had time to process any of it. But Nate was right. It was sensible to get rest while it was available, though Pan doubted she would be able to sleep. Maybe the others felt the same, but they nonetheless shifted into different positions. Wei-Lin curled herself up on a small portion of her bench. Karl, Sam, Sanjit and Jen lay down on the decking.

  Pan stretched out her legs and rested her head on Nate’s shoulder. His body was warm. It felt tender and secure. Within minutes the sea rocked her to sleep and for once she didn’t dream.

  Chapter 19

  Pan jerked upright, her heart hammering. It felt as though she’d been asleep for only a matter of minutes, though her neck was sore from where she’d been resting against Nate. For a second, she didn’t know what had woken her, but then she saw Gwynne kicking at the legs of those who remained sleeping. She stretched and tried to get the kinks out of her muscles.

  It was close to dawn and the sky was tinged with orange. Nate put his hands on her shoulders and kneaded, gently.

  ‘Best to get those muscles unknotted,’ he said. ‘I have a feeling we’re all going to need to be loose.’

  ‘Feels good,’ said Pan.

  ‘And my fee is very reasonable. Don’t worry. It doesn’t mean we’re engaged or anything.’

  Pan smiled. ‘Are we there yet?’

  ‘I guess,’ said Nate. ‘Look.’ He pointed over her shoulder to her right. Pan turned. Maybe two hundred metres away, just discernible in the diffused light, a dark land mass loomed. It was impossible to make out details. The other members of the group were standing now, stretching legs and arching backs. They too glanced at the land.

  ‘Listen up,’ said Gwynne. ‘Out of this boat in thirty seconds. Under your own steam or with a helping hand from me. Take survival items, get going. In seventy-two hours, at exactly six a.m., I return. I wait five minutes. If you’re not here, I leave. Even if you’re in the water, swimming. Understood? Right. Go.’

  There was a scramble for the items in the box. Wei-Lin took the bow and the quiver of arrows and the others divided up the items at random. Pan got the rope. Jen was the first over the side. She swam towards the shore with strong and confident strokes. Pan sighed. She couldn’t swim like that, particularly since she’d be weighed down with a rope. Pan was more of a breaststroke swimmer, slow but steady. She coiled the rope up and wore it like a sash on her left shoulder so that it drooped over her right hip. There was no point thinking too much. She had no doubt that Gwynne would see through on his promise to throw her overboard if she took too long. Already the others were striking for shore. Nate had dived from the side of the boat and scarcely made a ripple as he entered the water. His freestyle was strong and Pan was sure he would outstrip even Jen. She jumped into the water and gasped at the cold. The rope almost immediately doubled in weight and dragged her down. She kicked back to the surface and followed the others in her desperately slow breast stroke. I’m the weak link, she thought. The others know it and they will resent me for it. Even Nate.

  It seemed to take forever, but she finally felt sand beneath her feet and waded up onto a beach. The others were waiting for her and Jen could scarcely conceal her impatience. But no one shouted and Pan understood that Gwynne’s words had made an impact. Survivalists. Shoot first and ask questions later. They had no idea where they were or if there were enemies close by. It was important to keep absolutely quiet, but it was also important to get the hell off the beach and hide from potentially prying eyes. Even as she left the water the others were running for a dense thicket of trees, some forty metres from the shoreline. Pan hitched the rope more securely on her shoulder and followed.

  The trees were in a patch of swamp land. The water level was just below Pan’s knees. She was bitterly cold and already she could feel the sting of mosquitoes on her bare arms. This was going to be miserable but the first priority was to find shelter – somewhere relatively dry and private – where they could talk and make a plan. Nate immediately struck off inland, wading through the swamp. He carried the axe in his right hand and occasionally chopped at branches that hindered their progress. The others followed silently. Pan noticed Jen didn’t bother to slap at the insects on her exposed skin. After ten minutes she didn’t bother either. Toughen up, she told herself. You will not be the weak link.

  It took only twenty minutes to find land that was relatively dry. The trees were densely bunched and the place seemed secure enough. Nate glanced around and his shoulders relaxed. He threw the axe down, took off his jacket and stripped out of his trousers. His body was tough and lean. There wasn’t a spare ounce of fat on him. He put his clothes on the branch of the closest tree and spread them out. The others started doing the same. It was still bitterly cold, but their wet clothes were even colder. The tree canopy was too thick to allow a glimpse of the sky, so whatever sun was up there, if any, was of no use. Pan reluctantly stripped off to her underwear as well.

  Finally, they squatted in a tight circle. Pan noticed that she was not the only one who was shivering uncontrollably.

  ‘We need a fire,’ she whispered.

  ‘Not yet,’ said Nate. He kept his voice low. ‘Not until we know it’s safe. Sam, you’ve got experience with orienteering so I want you to scout out the surrounding area. At least a kilometre in every direction.’

  ‘And who put you in charge?’ said Karl.

  ‘No one,’ admitted Nate. ‘Maybe that’s the first thing we should decide. I mean, I take it there is no one here who thinks we can do without a leader of some description?’

  No one said anything.

  ‘I’ll take that as agreement,’ Nate continued. ‘So who wants the job?’

  ‘Oh, come on, Nate,’ said Jen. ‘You’re the one with a gift for leadership, apparently. This is just wasting time and I’m cold. The job’s yours, so tell us what you want us to do.’

  Nate looked around the group. They all nodded, with the excepti
on of Sanjit who did not glance up. ‘Okay,’ said Nate. ‘So, Sam, you’re on reconnaissance. Be as quick as you can, but stealth is vital. What equipment will you need? The compass?’

  ‘Karl.’ She replied without hesitation.

  Pan giggled, as did most of the group. Even Jen smiled.

  ‘Karl is a piece of equipment now?’ smiled Nate. ‘Okay. I guess it makes sense to move in pairs, anyway. All those computer games you played, Karl? Now is the time to put your skills into practice. But remember this is the real world and you only get one life. Take the knife and the compass. Look out for each other and the first sign of trouble, get back here as quick as possible. Understood?’

  They nodded. Jen slipped the knife from the waistband of her pants, flipped it and offered it, hilt-first, to Karl. He took it and handed over the water canteen. Sanjit passed the compass to Sam and she, in turn, handed him the fishing tackle.

  ‘Go,’ said Nate. ‘The sooner we know it’s safe, the sooner we can get a fire going.’

  Sam nodded and slipped off into the undergrowth, Karl on her heels. Within twenty seconds they were lost to view. The remaining five huddled closer together.

  ‘Love’s young dream,’ observed Nate. ‘It’s sweet. Right. Here are my thoughts. First priority is to establish if we are in immediate danger or if there are people around. We do nothing until Sam and Karl report back. If they give the all-clear, then we light a fire and dry our clothes. No smoke, though. Jen, do you know how to do that?’

  She nodded. ‘Gwynne covered fire-starting in our personal development sessions.’

  ‘Okay,’ continued Nate. ‘Then we need to establish a base camp, close to water and preferably with shelter. Wei-Lin should check out the availability of game and, if possible, lay down supplies. After that, I guess it’s a question of exploration, seeing if there are any survivors and whether they want to join us at The School.’

  The group was silent for a moment, then a small voice spoke.

  ‘We should ask Pan.’

  It was Sanjit. He hadn’t raised his head, and his hands were interlocked in his lap, writhing and twisting as if he were washing them. They all stared at him, astonished that he had spoken at all. They had become accustomed to him as a mute member of the group. Wei-Lin was the first to speak.

  ‘Ask Pan what, Sanjit?’

  He gave an almost imperceptible shrug. ‘She knows things,’ he said. ‘She knew where Wei-Lin’s watch was. She found Cara. I don’t know . . . maybe she could use . . . whatever gift she has to see if there’s anyone out there. Survivors.’ He glanced up. ‘It couldn’t hurt.’

  Jen snorted.

  ‘It couldn’t hurt,’ Sanjit repeated.

  ‘True enough,’ said Nate. ‘Wanna give it a go, Pan?’

  ‘Jesus Christ,’ said Jen through her teeth.

  ‘I don’t know,’ Pan said. ‘You know, if I’m to . . . get anything, then . . . But I’m not sure I will be able to. It’s kinda weird . . .’ She felt foolish even as she uttered the words. You’re not even making sense, she thought. You sound like a cheap mind-reading act, only confirming Jen’s impression of you. She swallowed. ‘I need to empty my mind.’

  ‘So empty it,’ said Jen. ‘Shouldn’t be difficult.’ She plucked a broad leaf from a shrub next to her, put it into her mouth then spat it out.

  Ignore her, Pan thought. Conflict is our enemy. She closed her eyes and tried to clear her head of all thoughts. How had she done it when she’d found her way into the mind of the falcon? Or when she’d fought Jen that time? She couldn’t remember exactly. She took deep intakes of air and let the breath escape slowly and regularly. Immediately she thought of how she must appear to Jen and then she had to banish images of the contempt playing on her face. She forced the thought away and tried to focus. The whine of a circling mosquito broke her concentration. Pan shook her head and opened her eyes. It was useless.

  ‘Anything?’ asked Wei-Lin.

  ‘Sorry.’

  ‘Maybe having an audience doesn’t help,’ suggested Nate. ‘Why don’t you find a place nearby where you can be alone? Not too far. We have to stick together.’

  ‘It’s no good,’ said Pan.

  ‘I believe in you, Pan,’ said Nate. ‘Give it one more go. As Sanjit said, it can’t hurt.’

  Pan shrugged, stood and walked away. She didn’t have to go far. The trees were so dense it wasn’t difficult to find a private spot yet still remain close to the team. She sat behind a tree and hugged herself. The cold seemed to be getting worse, if anything. She hoped that Sam and Karl would be back soon. The idea of a fire and warm clothes was very appealing. She closed her eyes and tried once again to put the thought to one side. Why was it so difficult to clear her mind? She concentrated on her breathing. One long, slow breath in. Hold it. Then gradually exhale. Keep the rhythm, focus on the breathing. In and out. In and out.

  This time there was no dramatic sense of occupying or being occupied. No slam of spirit into flesh. Just a vague feeling of danger. Close and getting closer. Pan concentrated upon letting the images, the impressions, in. If she thought too much they would simply disappear. Keep the breathing regular. The grainy darkness behind her eyelids softened and resolved into dim shapes. People moving through the forest. She couldn’t make out any details, just the shifting of shadows and the rustle of foliage. She caught a glimpse of the barrel of a gun. Ten people, maybe more. She heard distant whispers but couldn’t distinguish words. She couldn’t even be sure they were talking in English. The images were as fragile as soap bubbles. One small disturbance and they would burst. Pan tried to release her mind further. The images firmed. She saw her team running. Running away from something. Soldiers? Were they soldiers? That gun. Maybe. Running for their lives? She saw Jen glance over her shoulder as if afraid of what she might see behind her. Wei-Lin, an arrow nocked on her bow. Nate gripping the axe. And then the images folded and only a sense remained. Not even a sense. But for all that, Pan knew. She knew that one of her group would not leave this place. Only six would return to The School.

  She had no idea who would be lost.

  Pan opened her eyes. The cold hit her once again and she shivered, though whether that was from the temperature or the aftermath of her vision she could not tell. There is something wrong about all of this, she thought. There is something wrong about everything. She tried to pin it down, but it slipped away immediately, leaving only the overwhelming cold and a sense of terror.

  Pan got slowly to her feet. Her legs were almost blue, dotted with goosebumps. What could she say to the rest of the team? She couldn’t tell them that one of them would be left here. It could serve no useful purpose. But she could mention the feeling that they were not alone. It mightn’t help much and would probably provoke Jen’s scorn, but it was information she could share.

  Pan arrived back at the group just as Karl burst through a gap in the forest. Almost immediately, Sam appeared at his heels. A sense of urgency was stamped on their faces.

  ‘A village,’ Karl hissed, dropping to his haunches in front of the team. ‘Less than a kilometre away. You need to see it.’

  ‘People?’ asked Nate.

  ‘Oh, yes,’ said Karl. ‘But they’re all dead. At least, we think they’re all dead.’

  ~~~

  They moved slowly, in single file, through the forest. Karl led the way, Sam at his shoulder, and Pan brought up the rear. Sanjit was ahead of her. Even when walking, he kept his head bowed. What had he said was his speciality? Technology. That figured. Pan could see him in front of a computer. But battling nature? Sanjit against the wilderness? There’d only be one winner in that contest.

  She hadn’t had the opportunity to share her vision with the team and she was grateful. When all was said and done it wasn’t much of a vision at all. Nate had immediately ordered everyone to get dressed. Their clothes seemed even colder than they had been before, though Pan wouldn’t have thought that possible. She shivered uncontrollably as she pulled on her camoufla
ge pants. Jen didn’t seem to be affected. Shivering, Pan imagined, would have been an unacceptable sign of weakness for that girl.

  The team moved steadily and silently. They made little noise as they walked, and Pan couldn’t hear anything else moving in the forest. Maybe it was a consequence of the vaguely disquieting silence, but Pan felt an itch between her shoulder blades as if someone was watching. She tried to shake the feeling as evidence of an overactive imagination and concentrate on Sanjit’s bowed head.

  After less than ten minutes, Karl raised a hand in warning and the group slowed to a halt. He jerked his hand towards the foliage in front of his face and put a finger to his lips. Then he moved slowly forward and parted the leaves of a massive fern. The others crowded towards him. They were on the edge of a large clearing. The first thing that Pan noticed was the smell. It was sweet and sickly and caught at her throat. It took her a moment to place it. Death. The sickly sweet smell of corrupting flesh. The second thing she was aware of was a faint humming, a steady drone, like a power tool being operated far off in the distance. Flies. Dotted around the village were clouds of blackness, swarming and gathering over mounds on the earth. Bodies. Pan lifted the neck of her T-shirt and pulled it up over her mouth. Wei-Lin and Sam did the same. She glanced at Sanjit. His face had turned pale and he opened and closed his mouth. His Adam’s apple jerked up and down as if he was fighting a gag reflex, though he hadn’t covered his face. She put a hand on his shoulder but he didn’t react.

  Nate beckoned the group away. It was a relief when Karl let the fronds fall back and the clearing was hidden from view. Pan concentrated on her breathing. She recognised that she was close to hyperventilating, and focusing on the rhythm of each breath helped calm her.

  ‘I want us to spread out around the circumference of the clearing,’ said Nate. ‘Karl, you go to the opposite side, at twelve o’clock to where we are now. Sam at three o’clock. Pan at nine o’clock. Jen, Sanjit and Wei-Lin at four, seven and eleven respectively. Move quietly. When you get in position, observe only. If you see anything at all, any signs of life, report back to me, here at six o’clock. We wait thirty minutes. If nothing is reported I will enter the clearing. Watch for me. When that happens we move into the clearing together. Understood?’