Tormented Love: A Christian Romance (The True Love Series Book 3)

by Juliette Duncan

  “It’s okay, Eleanor. Thank you. That means so much, and I’ll certainly take it on board.” Ben squeezed her hand and gave her a warm smile.

  On his way home, Ben let those verses play over again in his mind. He didn’t really think his troubles were that light or momentary, but in the whole scheme of things, he guessed they were. He was on a journey, and this trouble was part of that journey. Two choices confronted him; be swallowed by his troubles, or fix his eyes firmly on Jesus, allowing him to work in his heart along this journey that had been thrust upon him. Ben gulped as the answer became clear. There really was no choice. He would fix his eyes on Jesus and not allow his troubles to engulf him any longer.

  Chapter 9

  On Sunday afternoon, Tessa headed back home in much better spirits. A thought was slowly beginning to grow inside her. A thought that made her heart pound with excitement, and she was almost convinced it was from God. Of course, she’d pray about it some more, and then she’d have to tell Ben. That would be the difficult part. Ben wasn't a very go-with-the-flow type of person and wasn’t that keen on unexpected changes. He preferred to plan and stick to schedules. Tessa sometimes wished he were more spontaneous and flexible, but maybe if he were, she’d then wish he wasn't. Well, she would just have to take a chance and hope he’d agree with her idea.

  When Tessa pulled into the driveway, she was surprised to see Margaret walking away from the front door. "Margaret, I'm glad you're here." Tessa jumped out of the car and hugged her. "I’ve got something to run past you."

  "Only after you let me inside so I can sit down and give my feet a rest. I've been ringing the doorbell and knocking for a good ten minutes now. I even tried calling you." Margaret took off her wide-brimmed sun hat and fanned her face.

  "Oh Margaret, I'm sorry." Tessa hurried to unlock the door and led the way into the living room. "I’ve been visiting Stephanie and her mother, and my phone died. I forgot to take my charger. Ben should be home anyway." She called out, but he didn’t answer. She didn't even receive a response from Bindy or Sparky. "I guess not. He probably took the dogs for a walk. Take a seat and I’ll get you some water."

  Margaret settled onto a couch while Tessa disappeared into the kitchen.

  It didn't take Tessa long to fill two glasses with iced water and return to the living room. In her hand, Margaret held a framed photo of Ben and Jayden taken at the wedding. Tessa smiled sadly and sat down on the couch beside her. "Do you think Jayden will come back?"

  Margaret patted Tessa’s leg. "Of course he will, dear. He's probably not ready to admit it yet, but deep in his heart, Jayden knows that you and Ben love him. He knows this is home." Margaret set the photo back down and took her glass of water, taking hold of Tessa's hand with her free one. "That's why I came over. I wanted to see how you’ve been holding up. Have you heard anything from him yet?"

  "Not directly. He contacts Neil, but he won’t reply to any of our emails or texts. Ben’s called him like a thousand times." Tessa sighed. "It's like he wants to forget we even exist."

  "Oh, Tess, don't talk like that. Give him time."

  “Yes, I know. I’m sorry.” How quickly she’d lost the confidence and peace she’d felt after being with Stephanie and her mum. Why couldn’t she be as steady and hopeful about the future as they were?

  "And how have you and Ben been holding up?" Margaret’s expression grew more serious.

  Tessa remained quiet for a few moments before answering. She exhaled heavily. "Not very well, I’m afraid. That's why I went to see Stephanie. I had to get away from all this." She waved her hand around the sunlit living room. "Everything here reminds us of Jayden, and Ben and I-" Tessa stopped. A flush crept across her cheeks. "Well, Ben and I are barely talking to one another. When we're both home, we're like ships in the night. We hardly spend any quality time together. Ever since Jayden left, he's been spending more time at the office, even on weekends when he doesn't have to work. And after Friday, when we got the news about the application…" Tessa teared up.

  Margaret’s eyes softened. She took Tessa’s hand. "Oh, Tessa, we’re all praying for you, dear.”

  Tessa swallowed hard and gave Margaret the best smile she could manage.

  “Thank you, Margaret, I appreciate it.” She drew in a slow breath to steady herself. “Let me make some tea.” Tessa disappeared into the kitchen and switched the kettle on. She needed a moment to settle her thoughts. Her mind was racing ahead of itself, but for the first time since Jayden had left, she felt she had some direction, but she needed to run her idea past Margaret in case it was totally unrealistic.

  Tessa was pouring the tea when Margaret joined her in the kitchen.

  “Shall we sit outside?”

  “Yes, why not?” Tessa handed Margaret a mug of steaming tea and picked up her own, along with a plate of shop-bought Anzac biscuits, and followed Margaret outside. Tessa’s eyes popped. The bushes had all been trimmed. They weren’t like that when I left. A smile formed on Tessa’s face at the thought of Ben actually doing this.

  “This is lovely, dear,” Margaret said as she gazed around the yard.

  “Yes, it is, thank you, Margaret. We loved it when we first moved in, but now…”

  Margaret patted Tessa’s hand and looked at her with a kindly expression. “I know a little of how you’re feeling, Tessa. All those years when Harrison wouldn’t have anything to do with Harold and me. Nothing hurts more than having a child who acts like you don't exist."

  Tessa nodded and wrapped her hands around the warm mug. “I think I’m okay now, after the weekend with Stephanie. But I’m concerned about Ben. He’s started counselling, but so far it doesn’t seem to have made much difference. And the decision we got on Friday really threw him.”

  "I’m not a counsellor, dear, but maybe you and Ben need to get away for a while.” Margaret’s voice was soft and caring. “Nothing fancy, but I’m sure a break would do you good. Somewhere different where you’re not reminded of Jayden all the time. Not that you want to forget him, but being away from here would help you to regain your focus on God and on each other."

  Tessa’s pulse quickened. She looked up and took a quick breath. "That's exactly what I've been thinking since being with Stephanie. I feel God’s placed this idea on my heart.” She paused. “Please tell me if this is crazy or not.” She drew another breath. “I had this thought that we should go on a mission trip to get a new perspective on everything. If we just went on a holiday, we’d still be thinking about Jayden all the time, and I don’t see it would help, but if we went on a mission trip, I think it’d help get our minds off ourselves and Jayden, at least for a while. I haven't thought where we’d go or for how long, but I just feel it's something we should do.” Tessa gulped. “Of course, Ben would have to agree."

  Margaret squeezed Tessa’s hand and smiled broadly at her. “I think the mission trip’s a wonderful idea, Tessa, and Ben just might think the same. You won't know until you ask him."

  Chapter 10

  Soon after Margaret left, the eager yaps of Bindy and Sparky announced Ben’s return. Tessa scooped up the stack of papers she’d printed out and stepped into the backyard. Since sharing with Margaret, she’d been praying for God to give Ben a positive heart towards the mission trip idea. Now the time had come for her to tell him about it. She hoped Margaret was right and that he’d be as excited about the idea as she was.

  Taking Sparky’s leash, Tessa leaned up and gave Ben a kiss. “Good to see you up and about, Ben.”

  “These two didn’t give me much option. Persistent creatures.” Ben let out a small chuckle as he unclipped Bindy’s leash. “They were about to have a fit if someone didn't take them to the park. Almost wore me out."

  “And was it you who trimmed the bushes?” Tessa sidled up to him, slipping her arms around his waist and leaning back as she met his gaze.

  Ben’s eyes twinkled. “So you noticed?” He raised an eyebrow.

  “How could I not? There’s not much left of them!”


  Ben laughed as he leaned down and kissed her slowly on the lips.

  Tessa’s heart skipped a beat. Where had this come from? Such a welcome and unexpected change, but giving hope that he’d be open to her idea. She reluctantly pulled away and filled the dogs’ bowls with water, all the while trying to keep her excitement under control.

  "How’s Stephanie?" Ben poured out an equal amount of food for both dogs but glanced at Tessa as he did. Bindy and Sparky yapped as they ran back and forth waiting for their dinner.

  Tessa smiled as she watched them, then lifted her gaze. "Much better than I’d expected. She can't use her legs, but she and her mum are so optimistic about the future. It’s strange, but the accident has helped Stephanie to see things differently. She’s got a much better outlook now than after she lost her job.”

  “That’s great, Tess.” Ben picked up the dogs’ bowls and held them above the jumping dogs before placing them on the ground. “I can’t imagine what it’d be like, though.”

  “I know, but she’s doing well, Ben. She really is.” Tessa took a deep breath. Here goes. "When I was driving back from the farm, I had an idea." Tessa held her breath as she held up a picture of an Ecuadorian village she’d printed out.

  Ben stepped closer, drawing his eyebrows together. "Ecuador? What’s this about, Tess?"

  Tessa gulped. "With all that’s happened with Jayden leaving, I think it’d be good for us to take some time away, to regain our focus on God and on each other. I hate how we’ve been, Ben.” She stepped closer, and lifted her hands to Ben’s chest as she gazed into his surprised eyes. “I feel God’s put this idea into my head, so let me speak. I think it’d help us get a new perspective on everything, and I’ve always wanted to go on a mission trip. After praying about it, Ecuador popped into my mind. It wouldn’t have to be for long, maybe one or two months at the most, but I’m sure we could stay longer if we wanted."

  Ben remained silent.

  Tessa held her breath. What would he say?

  "I don't know, Tess. You’ve taken me by surprise. Ecuador’s a long way from Australia, and what if Jayden comes back while we’re there? His ninety days will be up soon.”

  "We’d come back if he did; it’s only a flight away. We need to get away from here, Ben. And it shouldn't be difficult to organise. Elliott’s already there, and I’m sure he’d help us apply and get everything sorted. Think about it?" Tessa tilted her head, trying to work out what Ben was thinking. If he agreed, it would be a huge step, but one she believed would be so beneficial.

  Ben sat down and flipped through the papers, stopping every now and then to read some of the information. "I guess it might be good.” He raised his head.

  Tessa’s pulse raced.

  “I agree we should get away, but Ecuador? What if Jayden does decide to come home? It’s so far away.”

  Tessa sat beside Ben and took his hand, holding his gaze. "I fully believe Jayden will come back, hopefully sooner than later, but to be honest, Ben, I don't think it’ll be for some time yet, even with his ninety days almost up.” She paused and took a breath. She was talking too fast. “Jayden knows where we are, and if he wanted to come back by now, he would have done so. He wouldn't be ignoring us the way he has if he was wanting to come back soon. And if he does come back while we're away, we’ll just jump on a plane. I’m sure Elliott and the others would understand. And maybe we could try to visit him on our way back… it’s not far from Florida.” She was being a little cheeky throwing that in, but if it helped?

  Ben set the papers aside and rested his chin in his hand. After a few minutes of silence, he lifted his head and met Tessa’s gaze.

  Her heart beat louder and faster. She sensed God was at work in both their hearts. Just the fact that Ben’s outlook had improved so much over the weekend was encouragement enough, but now…

  "Okay, Tess, as long as we can maintain email contact just in case Jayden does decide to come back, I think going on a mission trip together will do us good.”

  "Oh, Ben!" Tessa threw her arms around him so suddenly he nearly toppled over. She could hardly put her happiness into words.

  The next month or so was a flurry of activity as Ben and Tessa prepared to leave their house in New Farm and fly to Ecuador. Christmas came and went. At least planning the trip helped to take their minds off the empty chair around the table when they had Christmas lunch with her parents. They tried to call Jayden late on Christmas night, but his phone didn’t even ring—the number was no longer active. And there was no reply to the email Ben sent. The Facebook message also remained unseen.

  Ben wrapped up the projects he’d been working on and left his clients in Walton's capable hands. Tessa put Harrison back in charge at the clinic and left Bindy and Sparky with her parents who happily agreed to look after the dogs while they were away. They decided to sublet their house to a couple who’d recently moved from Canberra to be closer to their daughter, assuring Ben and Tessa that the house and yard would be kept in good condition. After applying and being accepted through Mission to the World, Elliott's mission agency, and after getting some tips from Elliott on what to expect and what they should bring, Ben and Tessa were soon packed and on a plane ready to embark on the greatest adventure of their lives.

  Chapter 11

  A month had passed, and Jayden still felt like a fish out of water at Miranda High. Keith had snubbed him—the school's unspoken rule was clear; sophomores and seniors didn’t mix. The only sports teams they had were basketball, football, and baseball—none of which he played. Some of the students, and even some of the teachers, still asked about his accent which they thought was either funny or cute. He didn't understand why the way he talked was such a big deal.

  But at least he’d made one good friend, although hanging out with Raymond Astey wouldn’t help him make any more. Quiet and bespectacled, Raymond was the nerd of the class. He wasn’t into sport, but loved Science and Math. Dad would be happy about that.

  "Can you show me your jet ski today?" Raymond asked him one day after school as they took their books out of their lockers.

  "Sure. Mum's not picking me up, so we'll have to walk."

  Raymond shrugged. "That's fine. My parents never pick me up. I usually walk home anyway."

  The two boys slung their bags over their shoulders and began the twenty minute walk, chatting the entire time about the physics assignment that was due in three days’ time.

  Jayden’s eyes widened as he and Raymond rounded the corner and entered his street. A large moving truck was parked beside Mum’s car. A lump grew in his stomach. What was going on? Maybe it’s for the people next door. But they had their own driveways. The truck was in theirs.

  “What’s wrong, Jayden?” Raymond glanced at him with a puzzled look on his face, obviously aware something had caused Jayden to stop talking mid-sentence.

  “Not sure.”

  They approached the truck. The back was open, and Jayden peered inside as they squeezed past. A row of stacked boxes filled the back, and on the side, several large pictures that had been hanging on Mum’s bedroom wall were covered in plastic and strapped to some framework. Jayden gulped. What was happening? Surely they weren’t moving? He ran to the elevator and punched the button for the second floor.

  Raymond followed. “Should I leave?”

  "No, Raymond. Come up. I just need to find out what’s going on.” Jayden tried to keep his voice lighthearted, but knew he wasn’t succeeding.

  Jayden took his key out but didn't need it. The door was already open and Kathryn stood just inside it, talking to one of the movers. "Hey, Mum, what's going on?" He tried to keep his voice calm, but his heart pounded

  "Oh, hi Jay. How was school?" Kathryn placed an arm around Jayden’s shoulder. He shrugged it off. How could she sound as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening?

  "Fine." Jayden drew his eyebrows together.

  "I see you've brought a friend." Kathryn gave Raymond one of her over-the-top smiles. />
  "Yeah, this is Raymond. I wouldn't have brought him if I’d known all our stuff was being packed up."

  "I meant to tell you yesterday, Jay, but there were still a few loose ends that had to be tied up. I’ve sold the condo and the boat, and we’re moving to Texas."

  "Texas? Why?” Jayden strode past his mum and stared at the empty walls and rearranged furniture that was being broken down and packed away.

  "I found a job with a golf fashion magazine. It starts in a week, so we have to move tomorrow. Sorry for the short notice, Jay, but I had to make a quick decision. I hope you understand."

  No, he didn’t understand. Why should he? She’d told him she was rich. Didn’t need to work. So why all of a sudden did she need a job? And what about the private plane? Wasn't that hers?

  "Whatever," he said quietly, more to himself than to her. He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. “Guess I’ve got to go?”

  “Of course, Jay. I wouldn’t leave you here on your own.”

  “I was going to take Raymond for a ride on the jet ski. Have you sold that too?”

  Kathryn’s expression gave him the answer. She grabbed Jayden’s hand. “I’m sorry, Jay. It had to go.”

  Jayden shook his head. “I don’t believe it. Bet you’ve sold my guitar, too.”

  “I’ll leave, Jayden.” Raymond backed out of the door and disappeared down the hallway. Jayden didn’t blame him. How many mothers would do this to their children?