Shadows in the Grass

by Beverley Harper

  She returned and found him studying the portrait of an exquisitely beautiful woman, dressed entirely in black, an expression of haughty arrogance on her face. ‘My mother. Cold as ice, harder than steel, selfish as a cat and a bitch of the first order. She was younger than my aunt.’

  Dallas turned and saw that she held the two pouches his mother had given him. ‘You were obviously fond of her.’

  Jette’s eyes flicked to the portrait. ‘Actually I was. At least she was honest. Never once in her life did my mother pretend to be nice.’ She shrugged and handed him the bundles. ‘If you hadn’t found me I’d have made no attempt to return these. Everything’s there but this.’ She fingered the brooch. ‘A pity I must lose the rest. There are some exquisite pieces there.’

  Dallas took the pouches. He did not insult Jette by checking their contents. Somehow, he knew she told the truth.

  ‘Can you stay a moment?’

  ‘Not for long. I’m heading north in a couple of days and have matters to finalise.’

  ‘A couple of minutes only. I’d like you to meet someone.’

  She waited for his nod of agreement then swirled from the room, leaving only a hint of spicy perfume and an image of rustling silk. Jette returned a minute later with a sleepy baby. ‘His name is Torben. He is your son.’

  Dallas could see that. As Cam was a replica of his mother, Torben resembled Dallas with an uncanny likeness. He experienced a slight dizziness and shook his head, blowing out a long breath.

  ‘Jette, I had no idea.’ Dallas felt stupefied. This was the last thing on earth he had expected.

  ‘Of course you didn’t.’ She laughed lightly. ‘A woman of my experience usually takes precautions. You’d have expected that. My trouble was that for some years now I’ve had a strange yearning for a child. I expected to conceive while married but . . .’ She spread her hands expressively. ‘It didn’t happen. When my husband died it made my desire for a baby greater than ever. I felt time was passing me by and soon it would be too late.’

  Surprise quickly turned to anger. ‘You intended this?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘With no consideration of my wishes?’

  ‘Would you have agreed?’

  ‘Probably not. Frankly, Jette, you are hardly the kind of woman who should bring up a child, especially my son.’

  ‘Don’t be so priggish. This has nothing to do with you.’

  ‘Nothing . . .’ Dallas was dumbfounded. ‘You call theft nothing, for that’s what it amounts to.’

  Jette laughed. ‘I hadn’t thought of it that way.’ Her eyes turned soft and she kissed the baby’s downy head. ‘Forgive me, Dallas, for I truly did not think beyond my own need. Would you have preferred not to know?’

  He ran a hand through his hair. ‘How can I answer that? Confound it, woman, how dare you stand there and calmly introduce me to my own son? Did you think it would have no meaning?’ Dallas’s eyes were drawn to the child. It fascinated him to see such a perfect mirror image of himself. He groaned. ‘This has complicated my life beyond measure.’

  Jette came closer, her expression one of concern. ‘It doesn’t need to. I shouldn’t have told you, I’m sorry. Torben is such a joy and I wanted to thank you. Believe me, no-one need know.’

  ‘You’ve only got to look at him.’

  ‘Well, yes, I didn’t anticipate that.’

  ‘And what do you expect of me?’

  ‘As I told you, nothing. I did very well in Morocco. I’m turning respectable, my dear. I intend opening a dress shop catering for the wealthy, those willing to pay through the nose for something imported. It should make a fortune.’ She smiled. ‘Especially when a little factory I’m also starting begins to produce copies.’

  Despite everything, Dallas had to chuckle. ‘You are incorrigible, Jette. No doubt you’ll do very well. I swear, you have the scruples of a knave.’

  ‘Thank you, I’ll take that as a compliment.’

  His laugh was spontaneous and surprisingly hearty. ‘Dammit, Jette,’ Dallas said when he could. ‘Now what?’

  ‘Well, to be honest, I do feel quite affectionate towards you. There is no man in my life.’

  He cut her off. ‘There is a woman in mine.’

  Jette nodded acceptance. ‘A pity. Is she special?’

  ‘Very.’

  ‘I can see that duplicity sits uneasily with you. I withdraw the offer. However, should you part company, perhaps it will be made again.’

  ‘We have a child. He’s a few months older than Torben.’

  ‘Ah! The reason you left home, no doubt.’

  ‘No.’

  She waited, then added, ‘It’s none of my business, of course.’ When he still said nothing, Jette shrugged. ‘Honourable, too. A trait I pray has been passed on to my son.’

  Now he had to know. ‘Exactly what did you do in Morocco?’

  ‘It bothers you? What I did or the fact that it was done while carrying your child?’

  Dallas pulled a wry face. ‘The latter.’

  Her tinkling laugh sounded slightly forced. ‘How very droll. Very well, since you insist, I was employed by the sultan to set up and run a small gambling house. It required some experience in that area, which I possess. He paid me handsomely, though I confess to helping myself to a share of the profits. It was not a situation that could continue undetected. I knew the consequences would be terminal, sultans do not take kindly to being robbed. Judging the moment was about to come, I left. Simple as that.’

  He couldn’t help but admire her. ‘I’m sure it wasn’t.’

  ‘Perhaps not,’ she admitted. ‘It’s in the past. Today Torben and I are safe.’

  ‘And the dress shop? For how long will that keep you happy? You’ll be bored in no time.’

  She shook her head. ‘It’s different now. Torben has changed me somewhat. I have never worried about what people think of me but youth needs the security of acceptance. Being a bastard is an unfair burden for any child. That’s why I tell people his father is dead. It could be true. You have no need to fear that the truth will out. The secret can remain between us. In fact, I beg you to keep it.’

  No secrets between us. That’s what Lorna had said to him. ‘I will have to tell Lorna.’

  ‘Your woman? Why? It can only upset her.’

  ‘I’m sure it will. When I return home with these, I will have to tell her everything. If she ever meets you and Torben; well, the boy looks so much like me. Lorna will do the calculations. She’s no fool.’

  ‘Will she be discreet?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Very well. Do what you must. For my part, Torben’s father died before his birth. An accident at sea. He will grow up believing that.’

  Dallas stared at the dark-haired little boy. The pull he’d felt immediately on seeing Cam was missing. But Dallas had known that Lorna was pregnant with his child. Torben came out of the blue. While fascinated by the baby and his incredible likeness to himself there was little emotional connection. He had no doubt that it would come, given the right circumstances. But Jette had made it plain. Torben was hers and hers alone. It was probably best for all concerned that way.

  Jette took a step forward, stood on tiptoe and kissed him. ‘Thank you for my wonderful child.’

  Dallas moved back. ‘My pleasure.’ He knew it was the wrong response but, dammit, it had been a pleasure.

  Jette appreciated the remark and laughed. ‘I’ll walk you to the gate.’

  All day, Dallas worried about Lorna’s reaction, vacillating between lying by omission and telling the truth. If he lied and Lorna found out, she would not forgive him. This fact alone gave him the strength to be honest. He waited until they were alone after dinner.

  ‘Whatever is wrong, Dallas? You are like a bee in a bottle this evening.’

  By way of an answer, he produced the two pouches and dropped them in her lap. Lorna stared at the contents. ‘Where on earth did these come from?’

  ‘It’s a bit complicated
.’

  She looked at him a long while, then patted the sofa. ‘Come and sit. From your expression and behaviour it would seem you have something to tell me.’

  Dallas told her the whole story, from his mother’s revelation when she gave him the jewellery, to his involvement with Jette on board ship, to unexpectedly seeing her that day and discovering he had fathered her child.

  Lorna heard him out in silence, her fingers playing with the sparkling pieces still in her lap. When he finally faltered into uneasy silence, she asked quietly, ‘Have you told me everything?’

  ‘Yes, I swear.’

  ‘This woman Jette, have you feelings for her?’

  ‘Other than a sense of betrayal, no.’ He did not think it prudent to confess that, despite her actions, he found it impossible to hate the Danish woman.

  ‘You must have admired her. After all, you took her to your bed.’

  ‘A man . . .’ He saw Lorna’s look of distaste and broke off. ‘I’m sorry, my love, but it’s different for men.’

  ‘Why?’ she asked coldly.

  ‘We are capable of . . . of . . .’

  ‘Fornication.’ Lorna supplied the word curtly.

  ‘Yes.’ Dallas looked down at his hands, which he realised were gripping his knees. ‘A man who is not committed to another –’

  ‘Oh!’ Her expression was not encouraging. ‘But, Dallas, it was my understanding that you loved me. Is that not commitment?’

  ‘You were wed. Somehow, I knew not how, I had to forget you.’

  ‘In another woman’s arms?’

  ‘If that’s what it took, yes,’ he said a trifle defiantly. ‘I did not believe I would ever see you again.’

  Lorna’s expression softened slightly, but her words were hard. ‘Well, Dallas, the loss of your true father’s property would seem to be something brought on by your own foolishness. As usual, you have triumphed over adversity. I wonder if it has been worth it.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘You have a son. How do you feel about that?’

  ‘Furious. I felt she’d stolen more than what lies in your lap.’

  Lorna pressed her lips together and he could see she was very angry. ‘Stolen only what you freely gave. That is hardly theft.’

  ‘She deceived me.’

  ‘And I? Did I deceive you as well?’

  ‘No,’ he cried in anguish. ‘With you it was different. I confess, my darling Lorna, I knew there was every chance you might conceive our child. I wanted it to happen. If I couldn’t have you then at least we could share something precious.’ Dallas buried his face in his hands. When he looked up, his eyes were moist. ‘I have behaved badly, I know. I’ve been selfish, thinking only of my own desires. If truth be known, I’m still doing that. A gentleman would have accepted the position in which Sarah placed him and made the best of it. He would have sent you home, your reputation unsullied. Around you, Lorna, I cannot think of anything but a desperate desire to spend my life with you. I love you so much I cannot consider anything other than us being together. Of that I am guilty.’ He had run out of words, despair strong in him.

  Lorna took her time, chewing her lip. Finally she said, ‘You are not a weak person, Dallas, yet you have behaved in a most surprising manner. Why?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ he admitted miserably. ‘I had lost you. Nothing else seemed to matter.’

  ‘I can accept that you had a liaison with another. But a child, Dallas. She has something of yours that I believed was my exclusive right. It makes a difference.’

  Oh God, don’t let me lose her, not after all we’ve been through. ‘Not to us. I implore you, don’t let it affect us.’

  ‘Can’t you see it? There’s a child, your child. Of course that changes things.’

  ‘No.’ He took her hands. ‘How was I to know? Jette wants nothing from me. When I saw him there was none of the affection I felt immediately for Cam. I didn’t even hold him.’

  ‘He’s still yours. Surely you experienced some emotion?’

  Dallas shook his head. ‘It’s difficult to explain. Knowing you were pregnant with our child I loved you both. It felt natural, right. Jette was . . . a diversion.’

  Lorna gave a very unladylike snort.

  ‘It’s true. If she hadn’t stolen from me I’d not have given her another thought. I’m sorry, my darling, I didn’t see it as being unfaithful, and I certainly didn’t expect a child as the result. Maybe that’s why I feel nothing.’

  Hard eyes turned grey, or perhaps ice blue, bored into his. ‘Could there be more?’

  ‘What!’ He hadn’t expected that question.

  ‘Babies. Could there be any more out there?’

  ‘No. I swear.’

  ‘There’d better not be.’

  ‘There are no more secrets. Not one. I’ve been something of a lost soul but that has changed. Since you came back into my life I have purpose, a reason to live. I have no need of anything else, my darling, save you and our children. I will devote my life to us as a family. It is all I ever wanted.’

  The lip-chewing stopped. ‘I must love you a great deal, for it is in my heart to believe you. But be warned, Dallas, I will not tolerate further surprises of this nature. If we are to be together there can be no other, past or present. I hope you understand that. I mean every word. I’ve forgiven you so much already. There are limits.’

  He took her in his arms and was relieved when she stayed there. ‘There’s no-one else. I’ve made a mess of my life and paid dearly for it. Now that we are together, I’ll not betray you. I have no interest in other women. In fact, Jette offered and I turned her down.’

  ‘Because of me?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘And if I hadn’t been here?’

  Dallas didn’t flinch. ‘I probably would have said yes.’

  ‘So,’ Lorna smiled though her eyes remained cold, ‘I have competition.’

  ‘None. I want no-one but you. That’s the truth.’

  She searched his eyes and he looked back, willing her to believe him. Finally, her expression softened. ‘You could always get around me.’ She looked down at the rings, bracelets, necklaces and other fine pieces. ‘What about these?’

  ‘They’re yours. They’ll pass on to our children.’

  She picked up a diamond-crusted tiara and held its glittering beauty so that a spectrum of brilliant colour reflected the dancing candlelight. ‘Do you think I’ll ever wear this?’

  ‘It would look wonderful with a bead skirt.’ He waited anxiously. Was the flippancy too soon? Oh God, Lorna, laugh, please laugh.

  She did and he breathed more easily. ‘And this ring will go so well with broken fingernails.’ Once again, with the crisis behind them, she was able to move on.

  ‘Do you mind, my darling, that I cannot offer you the country estates and high life of Scotland?’

  ‘Mind? Of course not. I mean that, Dallas. Everything out here seems so vibrant. I feel totally alive. I’m so excited about the trip I can hardly wait for it to start.’

  He held her face between his hands. ‘I promise you, there are no more surprises.’

  Her eyes searched his for the truth. ‘You are like a drug,’ she said finally. ‘One I cannot live without.’

  ‘You will never need to.’ He drew her close and kissed her.

  A loud rapping on the door made both of them jump. ‘Who on earth is that at this hour?’ The mantle clock had just chimed ten-fifteen.

  Dallas rose. ‘Only one way to find out. Put those baubles out of sight, no telling who it might be.’ He left the room, crossing the wide entrance hall to the front door.

  ‘You’re a hard man to find,’ Logan said by way of greeting.

  Will was next to him, grinning like a fool. ‘Mrs Watson sends her regards.’

  Dallas could just imagine it. The poor woman usually retired at eight. He stepped aside. ‘Come in.’

  ‘Who is it, darling?’ Lorna stood silhouetted in light from the sitting room be
yond.

  Dallas made the introductions.

  Logan barely managed to respond, his eyes meeting those of a gaping Will, who nodded before the older man turned to Dallas.

  ‘If you don’t mind my asking, dear chap. What happened to Sarah?’

  ‘Long story.’

  ‘Don’t mind us,’ Logan responded cheerfully. ‘We’ve got all night.’

  ‘That’s what scares me,’ Dallas shot back. ‘Come on, you two. Thirst is written all over you.’

  They moved into the sitting room, where Logan immediately spotted a whisky bottle that Dallas had not bothered to decant. ‘Smith’s Glenlivet, as I live and breathe,’ Logan whispered reverently. ‘The Glenlivet.’

  Dallas poured him half a glass. Logan sniffed appreciatively then sipped. ‘Ah! Not another like it. The most complete of them all, dear boy. Nose and flavour superb. If the Highlands never contribute another thing to this world, they need not worry. And this,’ he held up the glass, ‘is how it should be served. In fine crystal glass from a generous hand. Cheers, old chap. Forgive me for not waiting.’

  While Logan waffled on and on about the joys of Smith’s Glenlivet, Dallas poured Will a glass of claret, for which he knew the Yorkshireman had a particular weakness, and whisky for himself and Lorna. Topping up Logan’s depleted drink, Dallas saw surprise on the older man’s face that a woman, obviously a well-bred one, would drink straight spirits.

  Lorna saw it as well. ‘Do you disapprove, Mr Burton?’

  ‘Not at all, dear lady,’ Logan said hastily, though clearly he did.

  Lorna smiled. ‘Many pleasures are denied women in the name of propriety, Mr Burton. Would you not agree? If truth be told, gender-specific codes of behaviour were designed almost exclusively by men. One has to ask, of what are they so afraid?’

  Dallas knew that Lorna’s words were more about seeing what made Logan tick than throwing out a challenge. God help his old partner if he chose to patronise her. Thankfully, he didn’t.

  ‘Indeed, madam. In the matter of malt, more than likely they feared not enough would be left for themselves.’