Target This

by Lily White

  When I approached the desk, a lady stopped me in search of the computer desks. I pointed her to the elevator, noting that she’d need to go to the third floor. When she was happily on her way, I sat down behind the desk and fielded questions for the next four hours. My eyes continued to watch for that vile man to leave, but he never stepped foot out of the room where I’d left him.

  At close to one in the afternoon, Mary Beth finally arrived to relieve me. “Oh my God, Autumn, did you hear?”

  I looked up at her in surprise and smiled at the excitement on her face. “Hear what?”

  She grabbed my hands and did a little jump. “Lucas Bates is here. He’s holed up in the old research hall. I suspect he’s working on his next book.” She turned to look down towards the wing of the library where I’d left that annoying man hours before. “Holy shit, Autumn, he’s so fucking beautiful. I’d heard how sexy he was from other fans, but I never imagined he looked like that. I’m going to go talk to him.”

  She turned to walk towards the hall and I grabbed her arm, pulling her off balance accidentally by the force of my grip. She landed with a thump on the floor and looked up at me, confusion and irritation obvious in her honey brown eyes. “What the fuck, Autumn?”

  Helping her stand, I apologized. When she was upright, I reached out in an attempt to smooth the wrinkles out of her sundress. She pulled away, shaking her head as she adjusted her clothing. “What is going on with you?”

  “I think I know who you’re talking about, Mary Beth, and the guy is a complete jerk. I mentioned the fact that I don’t like his books and he went off, touting everything from Mark Twain to dark erotica being useful to women who might one day end up in a captive situation. It’s nothing but crap. Now, sit down because I have to pee and you’re supposed to be relieving me.”

  She rolled her eyes before casting a glance back at the hall leading to the research wing. I could tell she was torn between relieving me of my post and knocking me on my ass to make a run for it, but eventually she let out a heavy sigh and sat down in the chair behind the reception desk.

  “Fine. Maybe I’ll see him as he leaves. If I’m lucky, he’ll have some books to check out and I’ll get a chance to talk to him. I can’t believe you told him how you feel about his books. They are genius, Autumn. You just have to give them a shot. Seriously. There is more to them than dirty sex; although the dirty sex is probably my favorite part.”

  I laughed. “I’m sure it is and I didn’t know who he was when I talked to him. I never bothered to ask for his name.” My bladder felt like it was about to explode so I didn’t go into further detail. “Gotta go. Nature calls.”

  I fled the desk before she could respond. When I rounded the corner in a desperate attempt not to lose control of my bodily functions, I collided with a large body whose musky scent rolled over me with familiarity. An odd heat blossomed over me and I shook it off when realization set in as to the identity of the person with whom I’d just collided. Looking up, I saw his smug grin first, followed by the stormy blue of his eyes.

  “I believe this is the second time you’ve assaulted me in one day.”

  His hands came up to move me away from him. In my shock, I’d failed to remove myself from being plastered up against him. After he’d set me back a distance away from his body, he pulled his hands back to himself, straightening his shirt where it had gathered on his arms from our collision.

  My jaw opened to respond, but he reached over and placed his finger below my chin to close it.

  “No need to apologize. Just know that I don’t allow people to touch me without my permission. However, if you would like to request to touch me, I’m sure we can work something out.” The corner of his lip twitched when he finished speaking and anger burst through me in response to his words.

  “No, thank you. I was just trying to reach the restroom.” I moved around him, heading into the ladies room. Once I’d finished, I washed my hands and exited the bathroom to find him leaning up against the wall. His stare was wicked and decadent, a joke hidden behind the rolling colors. His mouth was held in a tight line and his hands were folded in front of him. When our eyes locked, he grinned, something unknown to me was obviously amusing to him.

  “You know, I’ve never had someone so openly detest me within less than 24 hours. It usually takes at least 2 days or even a week for a person to grow to hate me. Please, indulge me and let me know how I’ve crawled so quickly under your skin. Perhaps, we’ve had a misunderstanding.”

  “There’s been no misunderstanding.” I tilted my chin up at him and held myself in the same posture as an obstinate child. I knew it, but I didn’t care. “Why didn’t you tell me who you were when we discussed your books?”

  He laughed, the sound dark and enticing, smooth as if he’d practiced seduction in a mirror. I refused to let him affect me, refused to notice the strong cut of his jaw or the wire-rimmed glasses that now sat atop the bridge of his nose. They made him look even more distinguished, more dangerous and intelligent. If he wasn’t such an arrogant ass, I might have lost my composure just occupying the same space as him.

  “Finally figured it out, did you? I was wondering how long it would take you. I could have sworn you were sharp enough to figure it out sooner.”

  “I think several hours is not too long for it to have taken me. If you’ll excuse me, I have work to do. This is MY place of employment.”

  He laughed again. “I forgot. You own this place. Congratulations on acquiring such a beautiful library.”

  His words were like sandpaper against sunburned skin. I could feel the hair on my body stand on end and when I looked up to find him smiling once again, I knew he was aware of the reaction I was having towards him. I wouldn’t let him win. “Continue harassing me and I’ll have you removed from this beautiful library. This building is open to all patrons but that doesn’t mean it allows abuse of its employees.”

  “Abuse? You call what I’ve done abusive?”

  Pushing himself off the wall, he took several steps towards me. My retreating footsteps were instinctual. He scared me, but I wasn’t sure why.

  “You’ve shoved a door into me and collided into me in the hall. You’ve outwardly spewed your hatred towards my books in a public place where any person could have heard you. Yet you’ve never read them to make such an insidious accusation. You’ve admitted that you would limit what people have the right to read when you are in a position where you should welcome all books whether they are your style or not.”

  “That’s not abusive!” My voice cracked when I raised it against him.

  “What’s the saying from Shakespeare? The lady doth protest too much?” Chuckling, he stepped forward again. “But how would I know the works of Shakespeare? I’m just a dirty porn writer, correct? Or at least to you, I am.”

  His voice was eerily calm. Condescension was a light flavor to his words and I knew that he was laughing at something that he found amusing. Rolling my eyes, I attempted to step away, but he was in front of me quickly, close enough that I could feel his breath against my hair and the heat of his body against my chest.

  I stilled and turned my head in refusal of glancing at his face. I didn’t need to see him to know the way his lips curled with a suppressed smile. After a few anxious seconds, he finally spoke.

  “Do I frighten you, Autumn? Despite your bold arguments, your body language tells a different story. You hug your arms around yourself to create a barrier between us. You hide your eyes from me and you attempt to get away as quickly as you can. What have I done to scare you?”

  A deep baritone with a lilting quality that made my eyes heavy and my knees weak, his voice was trance inducing, just loud enough to be understood, but not so loud it jolted me or set me on edge.

  Turning my head slightly, I refused to meet his eyes. “No. You’ve done nothing but irritate me. Please leave me alone.”

  I stepped away and this time, he allowed me to walk towards the front. I could feel his eyes on me
as I retreated, but I refused to glance back or pay attention to the fact that he was still studying every move I made.

  Lucas

  “I understand it’s short notice, but I’m sure you can swing some favors, Sarah. You’ve been coordinating my events for the past seven years and you haven’t failed me yet. It’s nothing more than a county library. I’m sure there’s nothing going on that would impede what I’m after.”

  My assistant sighed heavily into the phone. “I don’t understand why you care to put together this event. As you said, it’s a county library. At best, you’ll be flooded with lonely housewives who hope to ride your dick. It’ll do nothing for your career. I’m a bit surprised you’re even asking. You hate signings. Why would you even want to do this?”

  “My reasons aren’t your concern, Sarah. I say make it happen, you make it happen. You know how this works. Don’t question me. Make sure the media knows.”

  “The media. Have you lost your fucking mind? What in the world would possess you to…”

  “Are those questions?”

  Sarah sighed once again in resignation. “You have lost your fucking mind. I’m not sure if I like you while you’re writing this current work in progress. You’ve been strange, but whatever. If you want lights and glitter, I’ll make sure it happens. Give me a few hours and I’ll get the details to you.”

  I smiled. “See? That wasn’t so hard, was it? Next time we have this conversation, I expect you to answer with a simple ‘Yes, sir.’”

  She laughed and I could imagine the look on her face. “That will never happen. Maybe with your overnight guests, but not with me. I’m not interested in your brand.”

  She hung up and I tossed my phone on the table near the books that were scattered haphazardly across the smooth surface. Leaning back in my chair, I closed my eyes and absorbed the information I’d spent the last four hours reading. The mannerisms, behavior patterns, and thought processes of some of the world’s most notorious criminals and monsters ravaged the interior of my skull and yet, I couldn’t comprehend a single bit of it.

  Pulling the glasses from my face, I agonized over the perfect plot, the mechanics of deception, of the chase and capture of a victim. It was common for a pattern to develop with the skilled predator. Sloppy at first, they would perfect their craft just like any other person would do a hobby or job; a common element being their need to reach the high that comes with their particular type of perversion. Rape, slaughter, torture, it didn’t matter. It would escalate.

  However, it was the calm predators that interested me the most. The kind that were silent in their crimes; that slipped in like a gentle breeze, securing their target and disappearing before anybody knew something was amiss. They were cold and calculated. They took their time and were masters of patience. They were men I admired for their ability to focus so perfectly that they were rarely caught.

  I had my male character for this particular story. He’d introduced himself to me many days before; at first appearing as nothing more than a fleeting thought, but whose voice grew so loud, I couldn’t help but pay attention. After researching previous killers and sadists who seemingly carried the same fascinations, and who were driven by the same needs as my character, I felt satisfied. He’d been developed properly, had finally been formed and understood in my mind so that I could slip so easily inside his head to understand his thoughts, his desires.

  However, I had no victim – no heroine. She eluded me each day and even after reading through countless stories of chaos and tragedy, her voice was still silent. I knew it was because we never hear from the victim. She’d been hushed before she could tell her story and it was my job to discover her ghost – to live and experience her feelings of fear and desperation – her nightmare and eventual demise. It was a certain aspect of my profession that no one could appreciate; a place I had to go all too often to bring her voice back. I wanted to experience or witness everything I could imagine that she’d endured. It was never the same and I would never know for sure that I understood exactly what had been done. My mind would not fracture and my voice would not be broken apart by the sheer volume of my cries, but I would still go there. I would still attempt to see what I imagined she’d suffered, in order to give as much life back to the voice that had previously been silenced.

  “Mr. Bates?”

  Stripped from my thoughts, I turned around to see a petite woman with long brunette hair. Her round face beamed with a shy smile that brightened when my eyes met hers. She was dressed in a 1950s style sundress, the yellow color of which contrasted nicely again the smooth, natural tan of her skin. She held my most recent book in her hands and I noticed how her fingers gripped around the broken spine as if the book had been read and re-read to a point of falling apart.

  “Yes?”

  Her body jumped at my response, but she quickly gained control of her excitement. “Hi. Umm …” Her eyes looked around the room when her voice was a touch louder than what was commonly acceptable for a library. Lowering her volume, she continued, “… I just wanted to let you know that you are one of my all-time favorites and I would be so honored if you would sign my book…” She looked around again. “…or my boobs.” She winked.

  I released a heavy sigh. I would never become accustomed to women throwing themselves at me after reading my work. They didn’t know me or what type of person I am. They assumed I was like the characters I wrote: dark, dominating, and sadistic. Unfortunately, they were right.

  Reaching out, I took the book from her shaking hands and pulled a pen from my bag that sat on the table with my computer and books. Smiling, I asked, “To whom should I make this out?”

  Her smile grew impossibly brighter. “Mary Beth Carson…er…just Mary Beth.” She laughed and warmth rushed over her cheeks when she blushed. “Um…just Mary Beth…sorry. You make me a little nervous.”

  I grinned. Although it was a fake expression, one I’d donned more times than I wanted to remember, I continued to plaster on the gesture of openness for fans. I didn’t completely mind their enthusiasm for my work, but it didn’t mean they knew me. Their assumptions were that I could fall for them, possibly give them a life as dark as the books I write. They were turned on by the mystery of my life and my thoughts. What they didn’t know was that the life I could provide them would be even darker, more depressing and solitary.

  “Mary Beth. What a lovely name.” When I leaned over to write out my customary message and signature, she began to ramble. At first, I found the gesture annoying, but then she said something that caught my attention.

  “…my best friend, Autumn, and I are going out for drinks later…”

  Redirecting my attention to her, I smiled, this time allowing the dimples to appear on my cheeks and my eyelids to lower into a seductive stare. Unfortunately, for Mary Beth, there was no interest, but when she’d mentioned Autumn, my curiosity was suddenly piqued.

  “Really? Where will you lovely ladies be heading this evening? I’m not very familiar with the town, considering I only moved into town recently.”

  When she took a seat at the table, I excused her familiarity in order to discover more information about the woman who’d captured my attention previously.

  “That’s why you’re here. I was wondering why you decided to spend the day in our library. I’d heard you moved. I just didn’t know it was to my tiny town. Let me guess, you bought that large estate on the outskirts? I’m surprised you’re not living somewhere glamorous, like New York or California.”

  Laughing, I responded. “New York has far too many people for my taste and I’m not a fan of the constant sunshine that comes with California. I prefer the rain…hence the reason I moved here. And yes, I did purchase the old Carter Estate. However, it required more work than I preferred to bring it up to my standards.”

  “That house is amazing. It’s been abandoned for over 30 years. I used to sneak into it when I was a teen. It was a great place for parties…or intimate encounters.” She blushed ag
ain and I groaned to remember what the interior of the building looked like when I first toured it. I had the place stripped and refurbished prior to moving in, but even with new paint, floors, lighting and wiring, it still was not completely up to my standards. However, it was a Tudor style mansion that resembled a lost kingdom. The gardens that only months before had been nothing more than overgrown weeds and vines, had quickly been cleared and replanted. With spring approaching, the endless collection of bulbs had begun to shoot from the ground and the blossoming trees had started to reveal their colorful buds. You could get lost on the grounds of the property; something I ventured to do each morning when an unsettling mist blanketed the earth and created an eerie world where only small hints of sun could peek through the thick vaporous clouds.

  “I guess that means I have you to thank you for the money it took to bring it back to its original glory.”

  Like a small girl, she giggled and somehow her cheeks were able to blush even darker. “That wasn’t me. But I’m not surprised. I always loved that place, even though other kids treated it so poorly. They say it’s haunted, but I never believed the rumors. Supposedly Henry Carter liked to keep sex slaves chained up in the basement … or something like that. But I’m sure those were just stupid stories with no real truth to them.”

  They weren’t, which is the reason I was first introduced to the property. Sarah, as usual, thought I was insane when I told her to schedule a time for me to meet with the owners. When I first toured the property, the entrance to the basement was bricked up. I’d hired one man to break through the brick. I never allowed him to enter the room itself. I wanted to be the first and I was glad I’d made the demand. What I found was more than I could have dreamed.