by Amy Harmon
At first her lips felt stiff and awkward beneath his, but then her thoughts drifted to Luke. How it felt to be held by him, kissed by him, looked at by him. Suddenly, her lips melted against Jake’s.
Her fingers threaded around the base of his neck, and she pulled him close, as if she could turn him into Luke by kissing him long and hard. She poured all of her frustrations into the kiss. Jake not being Luke. Jessa signing up for this to begin with. The viewers need for romance. The pressure of helping the town. And now Caleb and his accusations.
But when her eyes started to sting from unshed tears, Taycee pulled back. She couldn’t do this anymore, not to Jake. Blinking rapidly, she turned her head away from the camera and buried her face in his chest. His arms pulled her tight against him.
What was she doing? How could she kiss him like that when it wasn’t him she wanted to kiss? Why hadn’t she followed her gut and told the truth last week like she’d wanted to do? It would have been the right thing to do, even if it had meant a mad scramble to come up with the rest of the money another way.
Instead, Taycee had caved. She’d even given everyone a finale.
* * *
Taycee cut a long stemmed rose and pulled the leaves off the bottom part of the stem. Her date with Jake was officially behind her, and for the first time in weeks, she felt the stirrings of relief. Yes, she still needed to get through the interview and find a way to coax Jake and Miles to move on, but the worst was finally over.
Or so she thought.
Bells jingled, and Jessa’s voice screeched through The Bloom Boutique. “You promised, Taycee! How could you?”
Now what? Honestly, this show had been the worst thing for thier friendship. Taycee picked up another rose and snipped the end off. “How could I what?”
Jessa appeared with windblown hair and a look that made the room feel chilly. She slapped a picture down in front of Taycee on the counter. “That!” she shouted. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”
There, on a bed of green leaves, was a low resolution picture of Taycee kissing Luke under the giant oak tree at the park. A sick feeling filled her gut. Someone had seen them and had snapped a picture they had no right to take.
“Where did you get this?”
“Off the gossip blog, along with several others. But that’s not the point. The point is, you lied to me.”
“I’m so sorry, Jessa. I had it out with Caleb yesterday. Luke saw me walking by the diner and followed and—”
“I don’t care how it happened!” Jessa shrieked. “What I care about is that you broke your promise. This looks so bad, Taycee! For me, for you, for Shelter. How could you?”
“I’m so sorry,” Taycee repeated, still staring at the picture with a sense of loss. The day they climbed the old oak tree was special—or had been special—before someone set out to ruin it. Who would do such a thing and why?
“Sorry?” Jessa spat. “You’re sorry? How kind of you to be sorry.”
In one swift move, Taycee grabbed the picture, wadded it up and threw it into the trash. But it didn’t help. Her body shook with frustration and anger. She’d had enough. Of Jessa. Of Shelter’s Bachelorette. Of always being watched. Everything. “What else do you want me to say? I can’t take those pictures back any more than you can.”
Jessa let out a heavy sigh and dropped down on a nearby chair. Her rapidly blinking eyes made Taycee feel even worse. Jessa never cried. And if she was fighting back tears, then things really must be as bad as she said.
“Hey.” Taycee placed a hand on Jessa’s shoulder. “It’s going to be okay.”
“Is it?” The words came out so quiet, Taycee could barely hear them. “People are really upset, Tace. They’re demanding their money back and threatening to sue. A few reporters have called.” Jessa paused and swallowed, staring beyond Taycee with a glazed look. “And the mayor even asked for my resignation.”
“What?” Taycee felt sick. She let go of Jessa’s shoulder and slumped against the counter. All this because someone got a pathetic little cell phone picture of her kissing Luke—a guy she shouldn’t feel guilty kissing.
How did this happen?
Jessa’s tear-filled eyes trained on Taycee. “We were so close. So close. I really thought we’d make it and that I’d finally be able to repay my aunt and uncle and all the other farmers who have been so kind to me over the years. But now”—she shook her head—“now I’ve made it worse. I gave them hope, and then snatched it away.” Her head dropped to her hands. “Tace, what am I going to do?”
Taycee wrapped her arms around Jessa. Just when she thought the worst was behind her, this happens. But what could she possibly say or do to make things better?
Jessa sniffed. “I know I shouldn’t have manipulated you into being the bachelorette. And I’m sorry I did. But you were great and everything was going so well. But now…” Defeat reflected in her eyes, making Taycee’s heart sink. It wasn’t fair that falling in love should have such a disastrous impact on everyone else.
But as Taycee’s mom had always told her, life wasn’t fair.
“I’ll fix this,” Taycee said. “I will. It was my fault. I’ll apologize and explain everything, and if people still insist on getting their money back, we’ll find another way. I promise.” But her words sounded empty and hollow. An impossible promise made out of desperation.
* * *
Luke knew something was up the moment he set foot in the diner during the dinner rush. All pairs of eyes looked his way. Some accusing. Some knowing. Some disappointed.
He frowned and stepped up to the counter where Liza stood with angry eyes. “What can I get you?” Her voice was like ice.
“Uh… ” Did Luke dare ask what was going on? Did he even want to know? “I’ll take the special.” Hopefully whatever it was it would be quick because he suddenly wanted to get out of there pronto. “To go.”
“Sure thing,” Liza said, punching numbers on the register the way she’d poke someone’s eyes out. She slid Luke’s credit card through the reader with an angry slice of her hand before tossing it back to him.
Luke eyed her warily. “Something wrong, Liza?” He shouldn’t have asked, but the words were out before he could reconsider.
“Why don’t you ask your girlfriend?” Liza snipped. “Or is it Jake’s girlfriend? Or Miles’s? I can’t remember anymore. From the looks of it, she’s not exactly sure either.”
Luke picked up his credit card and shoved it back in his wallet. “What are you talking about?”
“Give me a break.” Liza planted a palm on the counter and leaned toward him. “Don’t play all innocent with me. I saw the pictures of you kissing her. Was that why you asked me out? To make her jealous?”
Pictures? What pictures? Did someone see them at the park? Luke nearly groaned. Oh the perks of living in a small, nosy town. Liza glared at him, as she had every right to do. But it had only been one date. Nobody could be accused of leading someone on after only one date. Not even Luke.
“I asked you out to get to know you better,” Luke said.
With one final glare, Liza turned and walked toward the back room. Luke breathed a sigh of relief and looked around for a seat near the window where he wouldn’t have to watch everyone staring at him. But the diner was crowded, more so than usual, so Luke slid into the nearest seat he could find and wondered if the special would be worth the wait.
Probably not.
His fingers drummed on the counter until the sound of Taycee’s voice had him looking over his shoulder. Babette, a woman who loved gossip as much as she loved coffee, sat directly behind him with her laptop open. Luke would bet his truck that she was the anonymous keeper of the town’s gossip blog. Only it wasn’t the blog that appeared on her laptop today, it was Shelter’s Bachelorette’s website, featuring Taycee’s last date with Jake—something that Luke had promised he wouldn’t watch.
Taycee was in Jake’s arms.
“Did you really just compare my kiss to a c
hocolate shake?” Jake said. “Because it kind of sounded like you did. It also kind of sounded like I came in second.”
“Never,” Taycee’s tinny voice came through the small computer speakers.
“Good.” A full smile formed as Jake inched closer. “But I still plan to prove that I’m preferable to chocolate.” And then he kissed her.
At first, Taycee’s response was tentative, but then her arms went around him, and she kissed him the way she kissed Luke. Luke’s stomach churned, but he couldn’t tear his gaze away. This was why he hadn’t watched the show the past couple of weeks. Luke didn’t want to see her with other guys. Didn’t want to see her holding their hands, hugging them, or kissing them. It was bad enough picturing it in his mind.
But not once had he ever pictured Taycee responding like that.
Babette craned her neck to look back at him with her fake eyelashes and blue eye shadow. “That girl sure gets around, doesn’t she? That how she kissed you?”
With a barely controlled clench of his jaw, Luke stood and walked out of the diner. He set out on foot, leaving his truck behind in the parking lot.
What Taycee did was all an act, a way to keep people interested in the show, that’s all. She needed to make it look real. Luke knew this. But what if her response really had been genuine?
Taycee had always made it sound like the show was nothing more than an annoyance—something she couldn’t wait to be through with. But what if she cared more about Jake than she let on? What if she didn’t know who she liked better? What if her feelings for Luke weren’t as strong as he thought?
Luke suddenly felt like he didn’t know anything anymore.
But Taycee did.
He turned and headed in the direction of her place, his steps purposeful. A few blocks later, he stood in front of her door, his fist lifted to knock. He hesitated. What if he didn’t like what she had to say? Did he really want to hear her admit that she didn’t know who she liked best?
Luke stood there, hand raised, as varying emotions slammed into him all at once. Jealousy. Betrayal. And now… fear. The kind of fear that had him dropping his hand and backing away.
Chapter Thirty-six
Taycee slipped her feet into her sandals and reached for her purse. Her head pounded from the incessant worry and stress that seemed intent on following around her wherever she went, like Eeyore’s little raincloud. But the feeling wouldn’t go away. Like a storm that hovered for weeks at a time, trapping out the sun, the feeling enshrouded her.
Taycee started forward, knowing the only way past this storm was to force her way through the clouds and find the sun herself. And she’d start with Jake and Miles. Sure, she could rationalize her actions all she wanted—a greater cause and all that—but what she’d done to them was wrong. They deserved an apology. A big one.
Taycee flung her door open and stepped out into the humid evening air. She paused on her doorstep when she caught sight of Luke’s wavy brown hair and broad shoulders—shoulders she’d give anything to bury her head in right now. They would be warm and smell good and feel good. But why was he walking away?
“Luke?” she called.
He spun around, his eyebrows drawn together in wary surprise, as if he’d been caught somewhere he didn’t want to be. “Hey.”
Taycee stepped toward him, suddenly nervous. “Did you knock?”
He hesitated. “No.”
The pounding in her head changed from a rubber mallet to a sledgehammer, striking with strong, hard strokes. The way he looked at her made her want to run back inside and let her door take the brunt of whatever he came here to say—or not say.
But her feet wanted to run to him, not away.
“I saw your date with Jake,” Luke said. The words sounded accusatory and final, as though he’d already formed his own opinions and challenged her to negate them.
Taycee let out a breath of frustration. Not this. Not now. Not after everything else that was going on. “You said you weren’t going to watch that.”
A flicker of annoyance passed over his features. “Really?” he said. “That’s your response? That I shouldn’t have watched it? Well it’s too late because I already did.”
Taycee sighed. “It wasn’t what it looked like, Luke. You should know that better than anyone.”
He took a purposeful step toward her, and then stopped and raked his fingers through his hair. “I want to believe you, I do, but this bachelorette thing isn’t some fictional Hollywood movie. It’s called a reality show for a reason. You can talk all you want about how it wasn’t the way it looked and how I should know better, but here’s what I do know: On that video clip you weren’t acting.”
If it had been Miles or Jake standing there accusing her, Taycee would have expected something like this—even deserved it—but Luke was a different story. She had no reason to act when she was with him. There were no cameras trained on them. No viewers to please. No expectations to save a bunch of farms. He knew that. And yet here he was, questioning her motives just like the rest of the viewers.
Questioning her.
“What did you want me to do, Luke?” Taycee said. “Pretend to drop an earring every time he tried to kiss me? Or maybe I should have downed a spoonful of garlic before our date. That would have gone over really well on the final episode of a reality show about finding love.”
“That wasn’t just a kiss,” said Luke. “It was a full on make-out session—one that you looked more than happy to be part of. What do you expect me to think?”
“I expect you to trust me,” Taycee snapped. “Do you think I liked pretending to be into all those guys? Or kissing them? Or parading in front of those cameras like some happy-go-lucky girl who couldn’t get enough male attention? Because I didn’t! I never wanted any of this. I would have rather been with you during all of those dates.
“But I did it anyway. For six weeks, I went out with guys I didn’t care about and let my life become public domain so a lot of good people wouldn’t lose their farms. But now that’s all in jeopardy, and you know why? Because you decided to follow me to the park one afternoon and kiss me yourself!” The words were out before Taycee could rethink them.
Luke stiffened, saying nothing. He simply stood there, looking at her with a mixture of disbelief, anger, and hurt. Then he took a step back, pivoted, and left. It was the second time tonight she’d watched him walk away. Only this time, she didn’t call him back.
Taycee bit her lip hard and let the tears fall. One by one, they dripped down her cheek. Her own little shower. So much for forging her way through the storm.
* * *
Luke closed his front door and turned on the light. He should have never gone to the diner. Never watched that video. Never showed up at Taycee’s. Then he’d still be in his happy little cocoon, completely oblivious to the fact that the girl he was crazy about wasn’t so crazy about him right now. She made no secret of the fact that she would undo their kiss at the park if she could—a kiss he’d never want undone no matter how many problems it caused.
Luke dropped down on his recliner and flipped on the TV. A quick perusal of the stations offered him nothing, so he shut it off and resisted the urge to chuck the remote.
The silence of his house suddenly felt like a foreshadowing of his future. Empty. Alone. Deprived. He felt as if he were six again, when his golden lab ran in front of a moving car. Luke had stood there and watched him get hit, watched his best friend get taken away from him. But it wasn’t until that night, when he was lying in bed without his dog at his feet to scare the bad dreams away, that it had really hit him. He’d cried—long and hard. And with that cry came a promise to never own another dog again—not if that’s what it felt like to have your heart broken.
Unfortunately, that promise did nothing for him now.
The faint sound of Luke’s cell phone filled the house. He reached into his pocket and yanked it out, as if it could somehow stave off the ever increasing pain gnawing away at him. He answered w
ithout looking at the number.
“Luke?” a familiar female voice asked—a voice he’d never thought he’d hear again.
“Madi?” He hadn’t spoken to his ex-fiancée since he moved back. Hadn’t really even thought about her. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s Dad,” she said, her voice breaking. “He had a heart attack last night.”
“What!” Luke sat up straight.
“He didn’t make it, Luke. He’s gone.” Sobs practically vibrated through the phone.
Luke blinked, not quite able to believe it. Madi’s father had been in perfect health. He was a runner. Lived on a strict diet of healthy foods. How could this happen to someone like him? “Madi, I’m so sorry. What can I do?”
“I need you,” was all she had to say.
“On my way.”
Chapter Thirty-seven
Taycee pulled to a stop in front of the town inn and wiped a finger under each eye, removing any smeared makeup. Three windows glowed in the darkness. Which room was Jake’s? Was he even here or had he seen the gossip blog and already left town? Taycee wouldn’t blame him if he had.
She sat in her car for several minutes, taking deep breaths and trying not to think about what had just happened with Luke. An engine rumbled behind her as a car pulled into the lot. Jake’s Audi. He was still here. Maybe he didn’t know anything yet.
Taycee wiped her eyes one more time and stepped from her car. Before she lost her nerve, she walked quickly to Jake’s car and tugged on the passenger door handle.
Locked.
She tapped against the dark window. It rolled down, revealing Jessa’s face with her hair clipped artfully back and her silver dangling earring shimmering in the lamplight. She looked beautiful and put together—the opposite of how Taycee felt.
“What are you doing here?” Taycee said.
“Probably the same thing you’re about to do,” Jessa said. “Apologizing.”
