Stripper: The Fringe, Book 4

by Anitra Lynn McLeod

  As Diane toggled the fuel pump off and on, he dabbed patches to the damaged line. Pressing the plastimirror in conservative doses, he watched as it miraculously bonded. Duster couldn’t believe it worked. Mary had used plastimirror to thwart Windmere’s global security. It now worked in tandem with duct tape to give him and Diane another hour of time. An hour was all they needed to maybe start again.

  And Duster wanted to start again. Watching Diane put his ring—a ring she’d kept for seven years—on her finger without a moment’s hesitation pleased him so deeply he could barely stop smiling. Clearly, she wanted him, and he wanted her too. After they’d hashed out the past, he felt they could move forward. But what really sold him was the way Diane knew him at his very worst and loved him anyway. Unconditional love was a rare and precious thing.

  “Is it bonding?” Diane asked, her voice filled with desperate hope.

  “Thank that wonderful woman Mary, it is.” Duster quickly strapped layer after layer of duct tape to the lines. “Hit the fuel pump.”

  Diane did. Little spurts jumped out and froze like bristly hairs. “Shut it off.” She did, and he knocked the sickles away, then slathered more plastimirror and constricting tape. “On.”

  Working this way, Duster and Diane patched the gouged fuel line.

  “I’m coming back to the airlock.”

  As he made his careful way toward the airlock, the voice of doubt, the one that, no matter what happened, kept insisting Diane would turn on him, wondered if Diane would let him in.

  Secure, strapped to the pilot chair without gravity, Diane flipped power to the airlock so Duster could pull himself back inside. “Clear?”

  “Clear,” he said over his suit com.

  Once she heard the airlock close, she shut down the electrical feed to it.

  “Fuel?” Duster wrenched off his helmet, and she heard the words in both the hall and bridge com.

  “Recalibrating. Prox four two.”

  “That should get us to Dahank alive.”

  “Confirmed.” Diane said it and shuddered. Dahank. City of Jade. Sheldon and Scott. A thousand nightmares coming true. “We’ll need money to repair and refuel.”

  “Obviously, my funds are a little low at the moment.” Duster yanked his way along the ship to the bridge. He closed all the doors behind him so they only had to run air to the bridge.

  “I have money on Dahank.” There was more too waiting for them on that planet. How could she do this? She would have to trust that the fragile truce they had would be strengthened before she had to tell him the rest of the past.

  “You’re not going to try to get away?” he asked with an air of jocularity, almost like the question itself was a joke, but she sensed his worry simmering.

  “No.” She looked him right in the eye. “I am not going to try to get away.”

  Balancing his body, pressing arms and legs against the walls, ceiling and floors, Duster angled himself back into the three-point restraints of the copilot chair. Muscle-bound, knowing the strength of his body, Duster made his aerobic finagling look easy when Diane knew it wasn’t. Without gravity, someone had to be strong to move their body like that. Lifting his large hands, Duster tapped the dash and double checked the fuel level and their destination and distance.

  “Dahank. City of Jade. I think now is the time you tell me about Sheldon.” Duster waited expectantly.

  While he’d been outside the ship, she’d been inside fretting about how to explain everything to him. She pictured blurting everything out in one big chunk when he returned, but she imagined his face melting from shock. When she envisioned herself telling him in more manageable doses, she saw a return of his distrusting, angry face. In the end, she decided to start with Sheldon and go from there, so she was relieved when Duster’s first question was about him.

  “Sheldon is a friend of mine.” Diane calmly assessed the dash. “See if you can give a burst of spin and at least get some semblance of gravity back.”

  Duster did. It cost them seven minutes of fuel to mimic light gravity by spinning the ship, but if they compensated by cutting off life-support to the rest of the ship, they should be okay. They couldn’t get up and walk around easily, but at least they weren’t dangling from their chairs, and her stomach wasn’t floating up and making her gag.

  “Sheldon is a friend of yours.” Duster nodded, still striving for a cool air that he was missing due to his clenching and unclenching fist. “Sheldon is a man’s name, isn’t it?”

  “I guess.” Diane shrugged, baffled as to why that mattered. Even though she’d had time to think about how to explain, she found herself stumbling over her words now that the time had come. “For a first one, I guess it’s a male name.”

  “It’s his last name?”

  “No. It’s a middle name, actually. Mother’s maiden name. Sheldon is my best friend.” She swallowed hard. “And my roommate.”

  “And Sheldon is a he?”

  “Well, yes. I mean, Sheldon is definitively a he, but technically…” She trailed off, not sure how to explain this part to Duster. Diane felt guilty for discussing something so private with someone who really didn’t have any business knowing. Not really. Every word out of her mouth felt like a betrayal of Sheldon’s trust.

  “Technically, Sheldon isn’t a he?”

  “No.” This is where the explanation got a little tricky. She wasn’t sure how Duster would take the information. She hoped with an open mind. “Technically, physiologically, Sheldon is female, but she lives as a man and acts as a man.”

  “Sheldon is a lesbian?” His face twisted up with what she hoped was confusion and not disgust.

  “Well, no, not technically. Transgender. Biologically female, Sheldon lives and loves as if male, liking females, so not technically a lesbian, but basically. It’s complicated.” She shrugged and smiled. And then held her breath waiting for his reaction.

  “So your roommate is a woman who lives as a man.”

  “Right.”

  Duster opened his mouth, but nothing came out for a long time. “Are you a lesbian?” Duster inspected her from head to toe with a critical eye.

  Diane knew if she said she was, Duster wouldn’t touch her again with so much as a ten-foot pole, let alone his penis. She’d anticipated this reaction but worried that even if she said no, he wouldn’t believe her. Still, she forged ahead, determined to tell him nothing but the truth from here on out.

  “I’m not a lesbian. I like men.”

  “Which Sheldon dresses and acts like.”

  “I’m not dating Sheldon.”

  “You just live together.” His words fairly dripped with innuendo.

  “I’ve never been with any man but you.”

  “But you live with one.” Frowning, Duster turned his attention to the dash. As much as he wanted to believe her, it was obvious that some doubt still lingered. The only way they were going to get past this was if she told him everything. And they had a four-hour trip confined to a small area for her to spill her guts. Well, at least he couldn’t walk away. As she considered the tiny bridge, she realized there wasn’t anywhere for her to go either. They had no choice but to sit, strapped to their chairs, and hash things out.

  “I love Sheldon with all my heart. And I trust him more than anyone I’ve ever met. But I’m not sexually involved with Sheldon. We share an apartment, not a bed.” She found it difficult to explain her relationship with Sheldon without sounding defensive.

  “I hear Jade is pretty expensive,” Duster offered as if giving her an explanation for living with a man. Money was a big part of why she had a roommate, but there was more. Much more.

  “It’s very expensive, especially the nicer part of the city where we live.” The building that housed their apartment was newer and fashionable, but what they’d wanted was a place high enough to get them out of the street smog and away from the petty criminals who preyed on the lower units.

  Duster nodded, and after a long time, he finally met her gaze.
“Why do I feel there’s a lot more to this that you’re not telling me?”

  “Because there is. And I want to tell you, but I need you to listen.”

  “Well, we’re not going anywhere for a few hours, so spill.”

  “I can’t give you back 7Mil. I can’t give you back the life you think I stole from you, but I can give you something.”

  “It better be something good.” He tried for a casual smile, but it came off bitter, and he dropped it.

  “I think so.” Diane took a deep breath, then softly said, “We have a son.”

  She wasn’t sure what, exactly, she was expecting, but not Duster’s utter stillness. He didn’t so much as blink for almost a full minute.

  “We. Have. A. Son?” His gaze was on the console but unfocused, almost as if he were looking somewhere far beyond where they were.

  “Scott.”

  “Scott,” Duster echoed. He lifted his gaze and sat silently staring out at the blackness of space.

  As much as Diane wanted to speak, to fill that silence with inane chatter, she didn’t. Duster needed a moment—or two or three dozen—to compose himself. She expected all kinds of reactions, but stunned silence wasn’t one of them. And then her heart broke when tears filled Duster’s eyes.

  Chapter Eight

  “Mom!” Scott screeched and launched himself at Diane.

  Crouching down, well balanced, Diane scooped the boy into her arms, kissed his head, then twirled him in her equally fierce embrace.

  “I missed you so much.” Diane squeezed him firmly.

  “You must. You’re early.” When the boy struggled in her arms, Diane released him and turned her wary gaze to Duster.

  Spellbound, Duster witnessed the exchange with critical eyes and a swift rush of terror. There was no doubt that Scott was his son. Duster was so stunned he didn’t know what to do. What was he supposed to say as a father? He had no idea, and so he said nothing.

  “Who’s he?” Scott peered up at Duster curiously. Clearly, he wasn’t afraid, just inquisitive, like all kids were. “Does his brain need help?”

  “No, he’s not a client. He’s—”

  “I’m your dad.” Duster dropped down, squatting on his haunches. Diane had tried to prepare him, but nothing could steady him against his pounding heart. He had a son. Hearing about him wasn’t even remotely the same as seeing him. As much as he wanted to scoop the boy up into his arms and hug him hard, confirming he was real, Duster didn’t want to frighten him.

  “My dad?”

  “I’ve been away. Working. But I’ve missed you.” Lifting his hand out, Duster wondered if the boy would take it.

  Scott considered his hand, then glanced at his mom. “Is he really?” His question managed to mingle doubt and longing in three short words.

  “He is.” Diane smiled, encouraging him to take Duster’s hand. “Scott, this is Duster Jennings. I’ve told you about your dad.”

  Solemnly, Scott lifted his hand. Big green-brown eyes peeped at him from under golden brown hair with naked curiosity. Scott’s nose was shaped like his, but with Diane’s freckles scattered over it. There was no doubt that Scott was their son. Each feature was a balance between the two of them. Swallowing hard, Duster strove not to frighten the boy away. As much as he wanted to hold him and ask him a million questions, he stayed where he was and simply offered out his hand.

  After due consideration, Scott shook it.

  Duster gave Scott a careful handshake then let go. Unable to take his gaze off the boy, his boy, Duster just looked at him in dazed wonder. His son. Such a bright and beautiful young boy. For the hours they’d sat on the ship waiting to get to Dahank, Diane had explained how she’d managed to keep Scott away from the women of her network. Had they discovered she had borne the child of a slaver, Duster had no doubt they would have killed them both.

  “Everything’s ready.” Sheldon nodded to a pile of mismatched luggage. “I know you’ll stay in touch.” Obsidian eyes glared at Duster for a long moment, then looked away. She—he, Duster reminded himself—did not like the decision Diane had made but helped nonetheless. Just as Michael had with him. Knowing the futility of arguing what had already been decided, Sheldon, like Michael, had let go, no matter how much doing so hurt.

  And it was clear that Sheldon was going to miss Diane and Scott. Just as clear that they would miss him too. Resentment was hard to push aside when Duster realized Sheldon had been there for all the scraped knees, sniffles and real or imaginary foes. Sheldon had been the one to offer comfort when Duster should have been the one there for Scott.

  Sheldon, for all Duster could tell, was male. He had brown eyes so dark they were almost black. Sheldon wore a tie, shirt and trousers that were all perfectly matched in shades of gray. Thick black hair was cut short and brushed back. From head to toe, Sheldon was as male as any male he’d ever met. When Duster found himself looking for hallmarks of femininity, Sheldon frowned at him, and Duster turned his attention elsewhere. Duster wasn’t trying to be rude. He was honestly curious. He didn’t think he’d ever met anyone like Sheldon. Then again, maybe he had and just didn’t know.

  It was also clear to Duster in a matter of minutes that there wasn’t anything romantic between Sheldon and Diane. They were roommates and good friends but not lovers. It was also clear that Sheldon deeply and dearly loved Scott. As confusing as the feeling was, Duster felt badly about taking Scott away from him.

  Diane had offered for Sheldon to come with them, but Sheldon had a life here. He had just met someone, and their relationship wasn’t at the stage where Sheldon could suggest they move away together. But maybe someday, he’d said. Given Sheldon’s computer skills, Michael would probably be happy to have him on staff.

  While Sheldon, Diane and Scott said their good-byes, Duster loaded their luggage into the taxi he’d hired. Well, Diane had hired, considering all the money they had had come from her account. Again, a surge of damaged male pride filled him, but Duster pushed it away. This wasn’t about who was paying. This was about getting the hell off this planet and back to Windmere with his son. And his wife.

  Dull, throbbing fury still pulsed in him that she’d denied him Scott all these years. Even though he understood her reasons and realized she had done an incredible job taking care of Scott, Duster couldn’t stop feeling betrayed all over again. But he hadn’t said anything to Diane. Duster had kept a tight lid on himself all through their trip to the spaceport, all during their ride to her sky-high apartment, and he would do so until they were safely back on their repaired ship and on their way to Windmere.

  Duster knew if he wanted to leave with his son, he was going to have to make sure Diane came with him. And so he played the part that would get her to trust him. He’d kept his mouth shut and put on a mask of understanding that was slipping moment by moment as all the times lost to him flashed in his mind—holidays, birthdays, triumphs and tragedies. A lifetime, his son’s lifetime, out of reach forever. But Duster reminded himself he had the future. And he wanted his son to have the best future he could give him.

  Determined, Duster slapped a smile on his face, and only kind words came out of his mouth. He knew if Diane had any inkling how furious he was, she wasn’t going to get back on the ship and come with him to Windmere. If he could get her there, she’d never be able to escape him again.

  Good-byes said, luggage loaded, they crowded into the back of the taxi and headed for the spaceport. Night was just falling, and the city lights glittered brightly. The nearer they got to the port, the nastier the city became. Scott seemed oblivious, but Diane locked her door and leaned a little closer to Duster, crowding Scott between them.

  Sliding off the seat to balance on his knees, Scott pressed against the flexiglass partition so he could see out. Diane moved closer still, and Duster slipped his arm around her, giving her a reassuring squeeze. Anyone watching would think they were one big happy family, and they were. Until Duster could get Diane alone.

  After they’d landed,
she had told him they shouldn’t linger, not if they wanted to avoid the women of Network Thirteen possibly finding them, and Duster had heartily agreed. They had paid extra to have the ship repaired and ready to go within a day.

  Now that they were back on the Den of Iniquity, Diane showed Scott around the ship. After stowing their gear, Duster trailed after them, delighted to answer any questions Scott had. To give them something to do, Duster took Scott with him as he methodically checked that the ship was ready for flight. Scott seemed as fascinated with Duster as he was with the ship, and the feeling was mutual. Duster loved kids, and he’d been around a lot of them, but he couldn’t help thinking his son was the smartest kid he’d ever met.

  Already, Scott knew a lot about interstellar travel. He knew the various ship drives and the basics of plotting a course with the Tasher. Frankly, Duster was a little intimidated by his son. Sheldon was a computer expert, and he had spent a lot of time teaching Scott things that would baffle most adults. But to Scott, advanced computer matrixes and number sets were as normal as security systems were to Duster. His dread of an awkward and painful exchange as they all struggled to integrate disappeared as they fell into a perfectly normal and natural pattern. In a most curious way, it was as if they had always been together.

  “Are we gonna go now?” Scott asked, his gaze darting all around the complicated components of the dash.

  “I think we’re ready.” Duster gave Diane a brows-up look.

  “I’m ready.” She nodded and smiled.

  In that moment, Duster realized he could just let it go. This didn’t have to be an act. He could forgive her and move forward. Ah, but that resentment lingered. And that nagging little voice would not stop harping that she’d betrayed him yet again. Worse, she would find another way to harm him in the future. So much time lost, time that he could never get back. Being angry wouldn’t change a damn thing, but letting go of the hurt, really letting go, seemed impossible. A part of him was convinced that if he forgave her, she would just take forgiveness as permission to repeat her mistakes. To build a solid foundation in any relationship, there had to be trust. And for the life of him, he didn’t trust Diane. What frustrated him was that as they’d worked together to fix the ship, he felt that shattered trust repairing itself, only to lose it when she told him about Scott.