Indulgence (Taking Chances #1)

by Jeanne McDonald

  “He’s right,” noted Jacoby, glancing at his watch, “you’re right on time.”

  “Oh, I just figured…” I stopped mid-sentence, catching Jacoby nudge Brix in the side with his elbow. Brix glared at him, shaking his head.

  I narrowed my eyes and pursed my lips, confused by what seemed a little too flirtatious of an encounter for a man who was in a relationship. Well, as far as I knew, Jacoby was still in a relationship.

  Jacoby crossed his arms over his chest and nodded once in my direction. Brix cut his eyes to Jacoby and then looked back at me. The already light pink hue that colored his cheeks darkened as he opened his mouth and then snapped it shut. His lips flattened in a straight line and his forehead creased in what appeared to be annoyance. Maybe this was what Jacoby wanted to talk to me about. Maybe he and Eddie went splitsville and Jacoby wanted to start dating Brix. The thought made my heart pinch. Not only because of my secret desire of rekindling things with Jacoby, but also, damn what a lucky bastard he would be to get his groove thang on with Brix.

  Jacoby shook his head and closed his eyes. His lips twitched in what I knew was an annoyed yet playful grin.

  “Am I missing something here?” I questioned, shifting my mat on my arm.

  “Brix?” Jacoby coaxed from the corner of his mouth, barely moving his lips.

  Brix smiled at me and glanced toward the room. “I think it’s time I wrangle up everyone and get things started.”

  Jacoby covered his face with this hand, shaking his head. “Good grief,” he hissed so low I almost didn’t hear him.

  “We’re right behind you,” I stated with a hint of annoyance, still staring at Jacoby who seemed both on the verge of screaming and laughing.

  Brix started toward the workout room, then turned around. “Addison?”

  I could almost see Jacoby fist pumping under his crossed arms.

  “Yeah?”

  The corners of Brix’s eyes crinkled with the expansion of his panty-melting smile. “I’m glad you made it here safe. Class isn’t the same without you.” He paused and nodded to Jacoby, then disappeared into the room toward a group of giggly women who only came to this class to ogle him.

  Jacoby let out a breathless laugh and wrapped his arm around my shoulders while grabbing my mat from me. “That boy is hopeless. For someone who’s an instructor, he certainly has a shy side.”

  I leaned into Jacoby and breathed in the scent of sandalwood that lingered from his cologne. “What the hell am I missing?” I asked in a daze. Jacoby’s warmth and his mere closeness had taken away any frustration I’d felt. Being near him felt like home.

  “You really don’t know, do you?”

  I shrugged. “That Brix has a crush on you and you were flirting with him? Yeah, I caught on to that. Not that I blame you. He’s got a really nice ass, and from what I could tell thanks to Spandex, the man is packing in the nether region.”

  Jacoby led me into the workout room, where all the tight-bodied women were laying down their mats, preparing to have Brix lead us in our intense workout for the evening. Jacoby dropped my mat on the floor next to where his was already laid out and started to unroll it for me.

  “That’s not it at all, Red.”

  There it was again. Red. What did it mean? AGH! The suspense was killing me.

  “And we weren’t flirting,” he clarified. “Brix isn’t gay.”

  “Really? Could’ve fooled me,” I countered, sitting down on the floor to take off my shoes.

  “Trust me, he’s not.”

  “If you say so,” I muttered, placing one shoe beside me and then beginning to untie the other. Jacoby knelt in front of me, cupping the side of my face in the palm of his hand. I tugged my shoelace tight, startled by his sudden closeness.

  “Addy, I’m telling you the truth. He’s not gay, and I wasn’t flirting with him. I couldn’t do that to you again.” His eyes bore into mine, stressing his sincerity. “I’ve hurt you enough as it is, and the fact that you’re still in my life is far more than I deserve.”

  I nuzzled my cheek into his hand, closing my eyes as his warmth encompassed me. My mind whirled with possibilities. If he wasn’t into Brix and was worried about hurting me, not Eddie, then maybe he really did want me back.

  You idiot! Stop thinking stupid shit. He’s gay!

  His hand dropped from my face. I opened my eyes and swallowed down the lump that had developed in my throat. Deep brown eyes begged for me to believe him, and somehow I did. Jacoby had only ever been honest with me. No matter how bad I’d been hurt by his connection with Eddie, I could never say he lied to me.

  “I believe you,” I choked out.

  His shoulders sagged in relief as a burst of air released from his chest. “Good.”

  I glanced down at my knotted shoe and groaned. Jacoby chuckled and began working the knot out of my laces. I took it as the opportune moment to ask the one thing that had been driving me nuts all day. “So, what is it you want to talk to me about?”

  Jacoby yanked the tangled shoelace, unraveling it enough so that he could slip my sneaker from my foot. He placed it next to my other shoe, then helped me to my feet. Brix had walked to the front of the classroom, so we took our positions on our mats and faced him.

  “Well,” he started in a low whisper from the corner of his mouth.

  “Good evening and thank you all for coming out tonight,” Brix announced. “I know the weather is a little nasty and most of you have New Year’s plans you need to get to, so let’s get started. Everyone, please get into the seated meditation position.”

  Jacoby shrugged and followed instructions. I huffed and did the same, taking a seat on my mat and crossing my legs over one another, resting my knees on the mat. This was our moment of meditation to cleanse our chakras. To be perfectly honest, I didn’t understand all the chakras crap. I knew I had to root myself before opening my crown or some terrible shit was supposed to happen, but for the most part, it all sounded like the teacher on Charlie Brown to me.

  Whaa-whaa-whaa.

  Who cared about the chakras? Yoga was great exercise, and I had something pretty to look at while I worked out. Not to mention the fact that it allowed me to spend some alone time with Jacoby.

  “Close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose and release it through your mouth,” Brix directed, his timbre calm and soothing. “Again.”

  I closed my eyes and started to breathe, but as for the meditating part; yeah, that wasn’t about to happen. I was more concerned about getting Jacoby to talk.

  “Open your eyes and move into the child pose,” came Brix’s next instruction.

  Moving to my knees and leaning forward, I stretched my arms out and tilted my head just enough to see Jacoby looking back at me. “Well?” I whispered.

  His teeth caught the edge of his lip. “It can wait ‘til after we’re done.”

  “No!” I hissed. “You said it was urgent.”

  Jacoby chuckled, wiggling his fingers against the floor. “You’ve never been a patient one, have you?”

  I pretended to think for a moment. “No, I haven’t. Now, what’s so important that you felt it necessary to torture me all day?”

  “Slowly move to plank,” Brix stated.

  This pose always made me laugh because it reminded me of the silly people on Facebook who took crazy pictures lying on random crap. Whoever came up with that idea really needed to share whatever they were smokin’ at the time.

  We stretched our bodies out in a push-up stance.

  “Have you thought about asking Brix out,” Jacoby stalled.

  Had I not been so dead set on the assumption that Brix was gay, I probably would’ve already asked him out. I had no qualms about asking a man out on a date if I was interested, but I wasn’t going to set myself up for rejection either. Nope. Been there. Done that.

  “Quit stalling, Jacoby,” I warned him.

  “Seriously. You should ask him out.”

  So much for this being about us. As if I didn’
t already know that. The thought hurt a little, but I was a big girl. I knew the naked truth. Jacoby would forever be my best friend, but as his best friend, I could tell something major was going on.

  I rolled my eyes and pressed, “What’s going on?”

  “Downward dog,” Brix’s deep tone pressed.

  We all stood up and leaned forward while shoving our asses in the air. I noticed then that Jacoby’s breathing started to increase. Perspiration beaded on his brow, which was unusual because we really hadn’t worked up much of a sweat yet. He licked his lips and dropped his head a little too low for the downward dog.

  “There’s no easy way for me to say this, so I’m just going to say it.”

  “Very good, Courtney. Nice form,” came Brix’s voice from close by. He had a tendency to walk around the room as we moved into poses to make sure we wouldn’t hurt ourselves. I was too engrossed on what Jacoby was about to say to pay attention to Brix’s exact location, but his voice always made my stomach flutter with butterflies.

  “You know Eddie and I have been seeing each other for some time,” Jacoby hesitated.

  “Yeah,” I droned. Jacoby took a deep breath and pushed it out, making him have to readjust his balance. “Are you okay? Did something happen with you and Eddie?” I asked, my heart fluttering.

  I heard him swallow hard. He turned his face, shielding his eyes from me. “Yes.”

  My heart sank even lower in my chest. Sure, I wanted a chance to reignite that lost flame, but something was bothering Jacoby. He was antsy, just like he was the day he informed me he was gay.

  “Wanna talk ab…”

  I was interrupted by the words I never expected to hear. “Eddie and I are engaged.”

  Those five little words felt like cold water being poured over me while taking a hot shower. In a matter of five words, my whole world turned upside down once again. I felt as if I would be sick. I knew he didn’t want me back. That I could handle. I’d come to terms with the fact that we were only meant to be friends, even if my heart wanted to think otherwise, but for him to marry Eddie, I couldn’t bear the thought. It ripped me to the very core. Tears burned my eyes, but I fought them as hard as I could. I wouldn’t allow him to see me break. Not this time.

  “Three-legged dog, left,” Brix instructed.

  I lifted my left leg in the air, balancing myself on my right foot and hands, not really paying attention to my movements. I felt frozen in time. This couldn’t be happening. Not only had Jacoby left me for a man, but now he was marrying said man. Talk about a major blow to a girl’s ego. On top of that, I was alone. Sure, I could get a date—that was easy—but I wanted what Jacoby and I once had. I wanted what Jacoby now had with Eddie. I wanted love. Devotion. Admiration. A companion.

  How could everything be so off? My chest felt like an elephant had sat on it. I closed my eyes, forcing myself to stay calm and to breathe.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine,” I stuttered, trying to process everything.

  “You don’t seem fine,” he pressed. “Your face is turning redder than your hair.”

  I ignored his concern and forced out, “Congratulations. I know you and Eddie will be happy together.”

  “You mean that?”

  “Three-legged dog, right,” Brix announced. His voice sounded closer, but all of the blood had rushed to my head, so my ears could’ve been playing tricks on me.

  “I do,” I muttered, finding the irony in those little words. I moved into position, thankful that the new pose kind of hid my face from Jacoby. I didn’t want him to see the disappointment in my eyes.

  “I’m so happy to hear you say that. You have no idea how much I fretted over telling you,” he blathered. “And Eddie said I was mad for even considering asking you to be…” Each word that came out of his mouth sounded like a sound bit that had been slowed down to the point that it was almost unrecognizable.

  All of the sudden, I felt dizzy. The room seemed to be collapsing in on me. I’d never been the type of person to panic, but if I had to label this feeling, I’d call it that. PANIC! My leg wobbled beneath me and I corrected my position. “Addison, did you hear me? I want you to be my maid of honor.”

  Just as those words escaped his lips for a second time, two large hands wrapped around my hips. “Addison, you need to…”

  I screamed and jumped, startled by Brix’s unannounced touch. But instead of jumping straight up, as a normal person would, I fell forward, bringing Brix down with me. He fell into the woman in front of me, who toppled into the lady in front of her, causing a domino effect that could only be described as the funniest scene in a movie. Yet it wasn’t funny, because it was happening to me.

  I stood up. The blood rushed to my face. People struggled to get up from their fall, all staring at me as if I’d grown a third head. My eyes met Brix’s and I could feel the tears brimming. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” I repeated over and over.

  “Addy,” Jacoby stood up, moving toward me. I stepped back, stumbling over my shoes.

  “I have to go,” I rasped, unable to breathe.

  Brix was helping a woman from the floor, but reached for my hand. I pulled away before he could touch me. “Addison, this type of thing happens. Please stay,” his comforting cadence implored.

  But the damage was done. My world had gone completely off kilter. How could he even ask me to be his maid of honor? How could he be getting married? This couldn’t be happening. It was okay for him to date Eddie, but this was a commitment I wasn’t ready for.

  I raised my hands in the air, not giving anyone a chance to say anything else. I picked up my sneakers and mat and ran out of the room. The mat flew wildly behind me, like a cape, as I reached the door.

  “Addison!” Jacoby yelled. “Put on your shoes. It’s freezing out there.”

  I didn’t, though. I rushed out of the building wearing nothing but socks on my feet, which soaked up the freezing cold rain the instant they touched the ground. Thankful for automatic locks, I pulled the door handle on my car and jumped inside. Throwing my yoga mat in the passenger seat with my tennis shoes, I pressed the brake pedal and pushed the start button. The car’s engine rumbled to life. I backed out of my spot, refusing to look at the building. It wasn’t until I was pulling out of the drive that I dared to look at my rearview mirror. Brix and Jacoby stood just outside the door, shivering. Jacoby rubbed his hands up and down his lanky arms, looking as distressed at I felt. Brix stood tall and still like a statute, his expression uncertain and confused. Of course he didn’t understand the true reason for my abrupt departure. He probably thought I was humiliated by my act of clumsiness, which I was, but it was far more than that.

  Maid of Honor! Was he fucking crazy? What was he thinking?

  Tears burned my eyes, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t blink them away. The Bluetooth in my car started to ring. A robotic voice announced, “Incoming call. Jacoby Cross.”

  I hit the button on my steering wheel, ignoring the call. I couldn’t talk to him. Not at the moment. I needed to get myself together before we had this discussion.

  My head swam as I drove. I blinked hard, fighting the tears. The roads really weren’t as bad as everyone had been making them out to be. The rain wasn’t sticking to the ground, but still, I needed to keep my focus and get home. After I got there, I could fall apart in a tub of rocky road ice cream and feed my bruised ego with Celine Dion on repeat.

  Once again the robotic voice came over the speakers. “Incoming call. Amber Sachs.”

  Ugh! Jacoby called her. It was no use ignoring her. Amber was a spitfire and wouldn’t give up until I answered.

  I pressed the talk button on my steering wheel and answered, “Hello.”

  “Are you okay?” came Amber’s exasperated greeting.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Jacoby called me. I know you’re not fine. Fuck! What was he thinking?”

  “He wasn’t.”

  “Men are i
diots.”

  “Tell me about it,” I mumbled.

  “Where are you?”

  “On my way home. I just want to be alone.”

  “Nonsense. Come over here. This isn’t the time for you to be alone.”

  I sighed, “It’s no big deal. I’m just going to go home.”

  “Get your ass over here or I’m coming to look for you.”

  Amber wasn’t joking. I knew she’d get in her car and track my ass down. It was better to just suck it up and go over there. “Fine,” I groused. “I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

  “See you then.”

  We disconnected the call and I merged on to the freeway, making my bumper-to-bumper trek to Amber’s place.

  Chapter Three

  I parked my car in Amber’s driveway and sat there staring at the house. It was New Year’s Eve, yet it looked as if Christmas was still in town. Many of her neighbors had already begun the tedious task of pulling down the decorations, but not Amber. She’d leave them up all year around if she could.

  A small smile tickled my lips as I took in the winter wonderland that was my dear friend’s home. As a cake decorator, she had an eye for beauty and art. I envied her in that factor. White lights outlined the rooftop with perfect precision. A large Christmas tree, decorated in traditional colors, blinked merrily in the picture window of her front room. Bright red poinsettias housed in gold flowerpots, lined the sidewalk all the way to the front door.

  Now, while that all sounds normal and even romantic, if anyone were to pay close attention to the lights or the way the garland wrapped around the tree, they’d quickly discover a pattern. Every light bulb rested in a certain direction. The garland was spaced so many inches apart. The poinsettias were all the same height, shape, and size; and in the same type of flowerpots. Amber was a control freak in the truest sense of the phrase. But it was for that reason she was good at her job. She had a keen eye and a clever palate.