Her childhood hadn’t been happy, full of love and carefree bliss that a child should have. No. She lived with a mother that had more concern for herself and what new man would walk into her life than she had for her own daughter. When there wasn’t a man to cling to, she still ignored her daughter by searching heavily for the perfect man. Her mother had died hoping, praying, that her Prince Charming would pop into her life. She died alone.
When she stopped talking, the silence swirling around them, he didn’t respond with the typical words. I’m sorry to hear that. That’s terrible. What a horrible way to grow up. I can’t believe your mother would do that.
None of that left his mouth even though they punctured his thoughts.
Instead, he started softly speaking about his childhood, almost as low as she did when she first started. The teasing, the bullies that made his life hell. The lack of friends and people he could share his worries, some laughs, some good times with. His awkwardness with girls, then with women. His insecurities, that still to this day, he struggled with.
When he finished speaking, she answered his words with a kiss. Light and tender to his lips. The kiss turned from sweet to erotic in seconds. Their hands stroked from place to place, exploring, as if it were the first time.
With one whispered kiss, he asked if he could take her without a condom. Her response was a gentle smile and one nod.
He entered her with a desperate ache that only her touch could ease. They moved slow, then fast, then back to slow. The air around them became thick with heat, their bodies slick with sweat as they took their time to savor the love developing between them. Sure, he said he loved her before. She also said the words at the hospital. But this. This moment. The love shined through it all. Through the pain. Through the anger. Through the embarrassment.
True love. He believed in it. He always did. He just never thought he’d find it. Never thought he’d meet a woman who would love him for him. Shyness and all.
Dee embraced him as a man who could turn red as a tomato at the drop of a dime, who could wrap his words into a garbled message, yet understand exactly what he meant. She didn’t mock or tease or look at him with scorn. She looked at him with love and understanding.
Was he surprised? Not anymore. He believed they were more alike than anyone ever realized. He would never utter a word she said to another person to explain either. It wasn’t anyone’s business.
He made sure to be gentle as possible as he slid in and out. Hurting her was the last thing he ever wanted. Avoiding her arm wrapped in a bandage was almost impossible as she clung to him, as if she never wanted to let go. The energy sparking between them was more profound than ever before.
He couldn’t explain it. Didn’t even want to think about it. He just wanted to absorb it all. Trap it into one of the sweetest memories he ever had.
She tensed beneath him moaning a delightful moan. The sound sent him into instant bliss, tensing as well. Unable to hold himself up, he sank into her body. She made no protest. If anything, she wrapped her arms tighter around him, telling him not to move an inch.
“I love you so much, Dee. So damn much.”
“You better.”
That was his Dee. Always saying something he never expected. God, if he didn’t love her even more for that wonderful trait. He’d never be bored with her, that’s for sure.
He rolled to his back, not wanting to suffocate her with his heavy weight. Pulling her gently into his arms, he stroked her back as her head lay on his chest, her arm tight against him.
“I love you, Sauer.”
“I know.”
And he did. Even if she never said it again. He knew. She said it every time she touched him.
“When do I get my ring?”
She still surprised him with her outrageous words. A laugh fell out as he kissed the top of her head. “Whenever you want. Tomorrow. The biggest diamond you want.”
Her fingers brushed up and down his chest, tickling, teasing, enticing him to take her again.
“Can I get a ruby instead of a diamond?”
“Anything you want. Why a ruby?”
“Because it’s beautiful and it’s my birthstone. I’m a fan of red.”
Threading his fingers through her hair, he sighed happily. “So am I.”
“Did you mean it?”
“What?”
“About getting married next week.”
He hesitated. How did he answer that properly? Because he meant it. Of course he meant it, especially since they didn’t use a condom. Sure, she was on the pill, but he’d love nothing more than for her to get pregnant. He wanted to marry her as soon as possible and start a family. If he wasn’t mistaken, he thought Dee would want to get married just as quickly. She didn’t seem like the type to want a bunch of hoopla. He sure didn’t. The center of attention? No, thanks.
But he could be wrong. Maybe she did want all the bells and whistles when it came to a wedding. A big white dress. A large audience in a beautiful chapel. A reception that spoke of elegance and warmth.
Definitely, no, thank you. Find a judge, sign the papers, and be a married man.
“Sauer?” Her hand froze as she waited for his answer. Whatever that was. He still wasn’t sure.
“If I could make you my wife right now, I would.”
Best damn answer he could think of without saying either way.
Swift, soft strokes recommenced.
“I need to have the perfect dress.”
So she did want all the big to-do when it came to a wedding. That’s okay. He’d survive. For her. He’d do anything.
“Of course.”
“A week seems plenty of time for me.”
“Wait, what?” He met her gaze as she lifted her head. “You do wanna get married next week?”
“Yeah. I don’t want a big thing. We can go to the courthouse. But I’m wearing a dress that’s going to have you speechless the entire time.” A silky smile spread across her face. “A dress that’ll have you wishing you could have me to yourself. Sneak me away to a closet and have your dirty way with me.”
He moved like lightning, rolling her to her back and entered her with one smooth stroke. The feeling of skin-to-skin, no barrier, sent him spiraling into a bliss that could almost be described as painful. “I can’t wait to have my dirty way with you. How does now sound?”
Murmuring her pleasure, she moved with him.
Once again, the heat built. The love swirled. The magic soared to newer heights.
He loved her until she couldn’t speak. Until her moans were incoherent. Until the day faded into night.
She fell asleep in his arms. He stayed awake just watching her sleep. Thankful that everything turned out okay. That he didn’t lose her to a madman.
In a week’s time, she’d be his wife. Life couldn’t get any better than that.
Chapter 20
Sauer swiped at the hand tugging on his tie. “It’s fine.”
“Dude, it’s not straight.”
“It’s fine.”
Newman arched a brow, then shrugged. “Just trying to help.”
“Me, too.” He paused, then decided to go for it. “Did you change your mind yet about asking Susan to the ball? It’ll be fun. You guys can just go as friends.”
“Friends? No way.” Newman leaned against the wall outside the judge’s chambers.
Dee, Rina, and Zoe were in the bathroom putting some final touches on Dee. Or so Zoe told him. He hadn’t seen Dee yet. All day, in fact. It was only noon, but it was killing him. She didn’t even stay at his house last night, having a girls’ night at her own house.
The past week had been one of the longest weeks of his life. He was back on duty, after a few days of administrative leave, the normal protocol when there was a police-involved shooting. He understood the reason for it, even welcomed it. He had never fired his weapon before. Those days were spent thinking things through. Going over everything in his head. Did he have to shoot him? Yes, he did. He w
ould’ve hurt Dee even more. The department agreed.
Some nights he wished he could kill him again for the pain he put Dee through. Nightmares plagued her. The things she said in her sleep—well, he didn’t like to think about it. But it never woke her up, only him. He always whispered sweet words into her ear until she quieted down and continued to sleep in peace. In the mornings, he ached to ask her about them, but fear held him back. Fear she’d spiral to a place he couldn’t help her. Fear he couldn’t handle to hear her pain. Just so much fear. They needed to address it soon. He needed to address it. Now wasn’t the time to be acting like a chicken shit.
For some insane reason, he started to press Newman every day about Susan. Something he never did. It bugged him that Newman didn’t want to take her to the dance. Even as friends. He wasn’t an idiot. He could read between the lines. Newman didn’t want to be just friends with Susan. He wanted more. Or maybe he was reading him wrong. Newman did just break up with Chrissy. What the hell did he know? He was no expert at relationships. Look how many times he screwed up with Dee.
“So you want more than friends?”
“Why do you keep bugging me about Susan every day?”
Sauer shrugged. He couldn’t say because he was still trying to figure that out himself.
“Look, I like Susan. She’s great to work with, but we’re co-workers. Not friends. That’s it.”
In other words, Newman had a thing for her and didn’t want to ruin the great working relationship they had. Sauer, in the beginning, would’ve taken friends only with Dee. Now that he thought about it, he would’ve never survived it. Newman had the right idea. Being friends would just tear a guy apart. He should quit bugging him about it.
“Okay.”
Newman nodded, then stood up straighter as Zeke and Ben approached. Zeke grinned as he opened a clear plastic container in his hands. He took out the white boutonniere and pinned it to his suit jacket.
“My mom made it. She insisted you wear it, so you can’t argue.”
Sauer touched it lightly, then smiled. “It’s great. Tell her thanks.”
“You can tell her yourself. She’s with my dad. We can go into his office if you want. You sure you want my dad doing the ceremony?” Zeke glanced around. “Where are your parents?”
Sauer wanted nothing more than Judge Chance to perform the quick ceremony. Out of the judges he interacted with, he was his favorite. Always nice and fair when they needed a warrant signed. Plus, being friends with Zeke, it just seemed appropriate.
“I think my mom’s with Dee. They took to each other really well. My mom loves Dee, which I knew she would. They’ve been inseparable, shopping every day for the perfect dress, as Dee liked to tell me.” Sauer leaned closer, whispering in case his mom suddenly appeared. “My dad went for a quick smoke. She thinks he quit, but he’s struggling.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I did quit.” His dad, Bob, wrapped a big arm around his shoulder and winked at everyone.
“Of course you did, Dad.” Sauer didn’t even bother to tell his dad he caught a whiff of a faint lingering smell of smoke on him. His mom probably knew his dad was struggling and wouldn’t give him a hard time about it. At least, not too much.
Laughter followed as Zeke opened the door to his dad’s office and they piled in after him. Judge Chance sat behind his desk, pen in hand, concentration on his face. His hand swiftly flew across the paper. Deborah, Zeke’s mom, sat on a couch to the right of the room, her attention on her phone. Of course, the minute they both saw everyone enter the office, Judge Chance shoved the paper in front of him into a folder and closed it, then stood with a beaming smile. Deborah stood up as well.
“Is it time?”
“Almost.” Sauer walked slowly to the desk and shook hands with him. “Thank you for doing this on such short notice.”
Judge Chance squeezed his hand warmly, slapping a hand to his shoulder. “Anytime. Dee’s a firecracker. I’ve always liked her. Plus, she’d rip me a new one if I would’ve said no.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” Zeke muttered under his breath as he shook his head with a tiny smirk.
Sauer then turned to Deborah and gave her a small hug. “Thank you for the boutonniere. I’m glad you could be here.”
“You’re welcome. You look very handsome.” She smiled, a sweet smile. “I even peeked in on Dee, and she’s looking gorgeous.”
“You’re all going to your house for a small reception, correct? I took the rest of the day off. I don’t want to miss any fun,” Judge Chance said as he wrapped an arm around his wife. The gesture was adorable. He could already picture himself at that age wrapping a tender arm around Dee and holding her close.
“Yep. My mom set it all up. Food’s waiting for us. My dad offered to be our DJ. Newman helped me set up the bar area. We’re ready for the party.”
“And I bought the cigars.” Ben piped in with a mischievous smile to Bob, who winked again.
“Well, should I go knock on the bathroom door and hurry them up? I’m ready to party.” Zeke started toward the door.
Judge Chance cleared his throat. “Have you learned nothing from me? You don’t rush women while they’re trying to beautify themselves. Especially for a wedding.”
“My wife is beautiful no matter what she does.” Zeke walked back to the original spot he was standing.
“Good answer.” Bob stood next to Sauer, but leaned closer to Ben. “So, what kind of cigars did you buy? Just curious.”
Sauer couldn’t hold in his laugh. “Dad, Mom is not going to let you have a cigar.”
“Of course not. I can still hear what kind he bought.” Although, his eyes told a different story. He’d be sneaking a cigar at some point. Nothing would stop him, not even his wife.
Sauer just smiled as Ben went into detail on the type of cigars he picked for the special occasion. He wasn’t a smoker. Neither was anyone else, besides his dad. But at Ben and Zeke’s wedding, cigars were smoked at the reception. He figured it was a small tradition they wanted to do at his wedding. He liked the idea of being included in a tradition, even if he didn’t care for cigars much. He smoked one at their weddings, so he was smoking one at his own. That was that.
He glanced at his watch continuously, wondering what was taking so long. He knew, and agreed with Judge Chance, that women liked to take their time getting ready, especially Dee. She always needed an extra half hour in the mornings to use the bathroom. He never knew what she did in there for so long, but she always came out looking gorgeous and sexy. There was no stopping him. He loved to mess up the look by taking her back to the bedroom and having his way with her. She never argued with him, but for the sake of it, gave him a smirk of disapproval for messing her hair up.
Since she started staying with him, she hadn’t been back to her house, except to grab more clothes. And by more clothes, he meant her entire closet. His closet was so full of her clothes he was thinking they needed to buy another dresser. He was okay with that.
They hadn’t talked about what they were going to do with her house yet, but it was just automatically assumed they’d be living in his house. Besides her clothes, she hadn’t transferred anything else to his house. Only a matter of time before they did. Not many opportunities arose in the past week. They had been too busy enjoying each other’s company, and the fact his mom had been at his house every day talking wedding plans with Dee. Oddly enough, Dee enjoyed it.
What was taking so long?
If he had to wait much longer, he might start sweating that she was changing her mind. Maybe she finally realized she couldn’t handle his shyness and awkwardness at times. Maybe they just weren’t compatible enough for each other. Maybe she pretended all week she liked his mother when she really didn’t. Maybe—
The door to the chambers opened.
“Get that look of fright off your face, sweetie. Deena wanted to look perfect.” His mom, Francine, or Franny to friends and family, walked up to him and kissed his cheek,
instantly soothing his rattled nerves. His mom always had that affect on him.
“She’s always perfect to me.”
“I know.” She patted his cheek affectionately, then clapped her hands excitedly. “Places, people. My son is getting married.”
Like that, his mother took charge. As a child, it always made him look at her with awe at how confident and sure of herself she was in every little thing she did and said. As an adult, he still appreciated the poise in which she conducted herself. She arranged him right next to Judge Chance, Newman next to him as his best man, then Zeke and Ben after him. On the other side of Judge Chance, she positioned Zoe, then Rina. Deborah stood to the side, a few steps away from them. When she appeared satisfied everyone stood in the correct spot, she poked her head out of the door, then took a spot next to his dad, who stood not too far away from Ben.
He glanced around the room, happiness filling his heart at who stood with him. Sadness filtered in a tiny bit. He even told Dee to ask Stitch to come, trying not to let the jealousy consume him, but Dee declined, insisting Stitch wouldn’t feel comfortable being here. She added she wanted it small, no fuss. So he didn’t argue with her about it.
The door slowly opened.
He lost his breath. His knees went weak. No words could describe how he felt. Hell, words were impossible to form. She left him utterly speechless.
He loved many things about Dee. Her fiery attitude. Her loyalty. Her protectiveness of the people she cared about. Her beauty. Her hair, so crazy and curly and always full of character. Perhaps she knew that. Because what he loved most about her as she took gradual steps toward him, her eyes locked with his, was her gorgeous red hair. Not coiled to perfection into an up-do that he thought she might do, but hanging loose, wild, and carefree. Just like the Dee he loved.
And the dress.
Whew!
What could he say? Words were stuck in his throat.
He knew she loved her clothes tight, short, and revealing in all the right places. Hell, just two nights ago he had her perform a fashion show for him so he could see all her dresses. He never had so much fun in his life, watching her dress and undress in front of him, then parade the skimpy dress around the room. She tried on four dresses before he couldn’t take it anymore and tossed her onto the bed for a different kind of fun. The closet definitely held more than four dresses.
One Taste of Crazy (A One Taste Novel Book 3) Page 21
