The Nurse's Secret Son

by Amy Andrews

  Leah and Sophie looked at each other. Sophie didn’t need to ask to know that Leah would be thinking the same thing. How awful to lose your mind and be stuck in an era that would have been dreadful enough the first time around. It would be like constantly reliving your worst nightmare.

  They let the old woman be for a moment and her rantings stopped—temporarily. She continued to eye them suspiciously. Sophie’s heart went out to Anna. She looked embarrassed and…exhausted.

  ‘Does she live with you?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes. My grandfather died two years ago just as she was getting a bit forgetful. My husband and I have been looking after her ever since. The last few months have been very difficult with a new baby and all.’

  ‘Does she have any periods of lucidity?’ Leah asked.

  ‘Not any more.’

  Tears welled in Anna’s eyes and she brushed them away quickly. Sophie put her arm around the young woman’s shoulders and gave them a squeeze—she looked at her wits’ end.

  ‘Come on,’ she said. ‘Leah and I will change your grandmother and then we’ll discuss getting her admitted and having her assessed by the geriatric assessment team.’

  ‘But they’ll put her in a home,’ Anna sobbed. ‘I promised Papa I’d look after her. I don’t want her to be with strangers.’

  ‘It doesn’t have to come to that,’ Sophie reassured her. ‘They can help with all sorts of things—medication and respite and helping you with adapting your home for her needs.’

  ‘Papa would never forgive me if I put her in a home.’

  Sophie was moved by Anna’s loyalty. ‘Does she recognise you at all these days?’

  ‘No,’ the girl sniffed. ‘She thinks she’s in the camp. It wasn’t a particularly pleasant place and she thinks I’m one of the guards.’ Anna started to sob and Sophie comforted her a bit more.

  ‘Hey, come on, now, we’re going to need you to help us. Does your grandmother speak any English?’

  ‘She used to be able to but she hasn’t recognised it for about the last six months.’

  ‘Well, we’ll need you to translate. Talk to her and tell her what we’re doing. It might help.’

  ‘OK, Mrs Schmidt,’ said Leah, ‘time to get you cleaned up.’

  They operated as a team, trying to remove Mrs Schmidt’s blouse and dodge her fists as well. She fought and yelled and flailed her arms and hurled insults at the top of her lungs.

  It was difficult work but Sophie had dealt with worse. She could only imagine the old woman’s fright as she battled with her would-be attackers. She had to wonder, as Mrs Schmidt fought them tooth and nail, what kind of memory she was stuck in now.

  It would have been comical had it not been so sad. One wizened old lady fighting off two nurses with a strength that belied her bird-like size and a mouth a wharfie would have been proud of. She may have been speaking Polish but everyone in the cube got the gist!

  What happened next took Sophie completely by surprise. Afterwards she couldn’t even recall how it had unfolded. Sophie turned to say something to Anna and as she turned back Mrs Schmidt’s open hand connected with Sophie’s face and knocked her backwards into the wall.

  ‘Mama!’ gasped Anna, yelling at her in Polish.

  Sophie felt the wall behind her as she slid down it, cradling her stinging face and tasting the metallic taste of blood in her mouth.

  ‘Sophie!’ Leah rushed to her side. ‘Are you OK?’

  ‘Not really, no,’ Sophie muttered, as stars floated in front of her eyes.

  Leah poked her head out of the curtain. She couldn’t see Todd but she did spy Daniel with a patient in tow, who was talking to Karen at the triage desk. ‘Good. You’ll do.’ And she dragged him behind the curtain.

  The noise in the cubicle was the first thing Daniel noticed. The elderly woman on the trolley was yelling in a strange language and the younger woman was yelling back at her between bouts of hysterical sobbing.

  Then he noticed Sophie crouched on the floor and his heart almost stopped. She looked pale and shocked and he noticed the livid red mark on her face not adequately covered by her hand. He forgot all his angst and responded to her as he had always done when she had hurt herself, helping her up from the floor.

  ‘Daniel?’ Sophie looked at him, surprise adding to her dazed look.

  He led her gently out of the cubicle.

  ‘I’m OK, really,’ said Sophie, the stars and buzzing noise starting to clear from her head. ‘It was my fault. I wasn’t quick enough. I didn’t duck quick enough.’

  Daniel sat Sophie on a chair in the staffroom, gently pried her fingers from her injured face and inspected the damage. ‘You were assaulted, Sophie,’ said Daniel testily. ‘It wasn’t your fault.’ He probed her jaw and cheekbone and she grimaced slightly. ‘Do you have ice packs?’

  ‘Fridge,’ she said, pointing to it.

  Relieved to be moving away from her, he opened the door and retrieved an ice pack from the freezer. Sophie winced slightly as he knelt before her again and applied the chilled pack to the angry red mark.

  ‘Put your teeth together and smile at me,’ he said.

  ‘I’m all right, Daniel,’ she protested.

  ‘Smile,’ he reiterated, his blue eyes brooking no argument.

  She did as she was told. ‘Doesn’t appear to be any major malformation. You should get an X-ray just in case, though.’

  As he spoke he traced the outline of the ugly red weal with his fingertips. Back and forth. Back and forth. Sophie realised how close he was to her and found the caress hypnotising. Staring into his blue eyes as his fingers lightly stroked her aching face was compelling. She almost sighed as the faint touch took her back four years.

  Todd rushed into the room and broke up the intimate scene. He all put pushed Daniel aside, repeating the quick checks he had just completed.

  Daniel’s earlier misgivings about Todd intensified. He felt the unnatural urge to pick the doctor up and throw him across the room as he watched Todd’s fingers touching Sophie’s face.

  ‘We’ll get an X-ray,’ Todd said.

  ‘No,’ said Sophie rising from the chair. She was feeling better now, her cheek just a dull ache. ‘I’m fine. Nothing’s broken. I’m just going to sport a shiner for a few days.’

  ‘He’s right,’ Daniel butted in, the admission rankling. ‘An X-ray would be sensible.’

  ‘If I had an X-ray for every time a patient has whacked me, I’d be glowing green by now,’ Sophie said dismissively.

  ‘This happens a lot?’ Daniel couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

  ‘More often than you think,’ she admitted.

  ‘That’s appalling!’

  ‘What are you going to do, Daniel? The majority of incidences occur with demented patients. Mrs Schmidt thinks she’s in a refugee camp. I’m more cranky with myself than anything. I’m pretty good at ducking and weaving. I was silly for not being more on guard.’

  Todd’s pager went off. ‘I have to go,’ he said.

  ‘Todd, make sure you document in Mrs Schmidt’s chart that she needs her dementia assessed by the geriatric team.’

  ‘Are you sure you’ll be all right? I feel a little guilty about leaving,’ he said, and pouted dramatically.

  Sophie smiled and rolled her eyes as she sat back down. ‘I’m fine. Go!’ she ordered.

  Daniel could have cheered when Todd left. He knelt before Sophie and placed his hand over hers as she cradled the ice pack to her cheek. He gently drew her hand away to inspect the injury. It was looking better. ‘You’ll live,’ he said gruffly.

  ‘Thank you, Daniel,’ she said, because she had to say something to hide the confusion she was feeling.

  They stared at each other for a few moments. His blue eyes compelling. His short, salt and pepper hair tempting. His clean-shaven jawline strong and somehow comforting. Now thirty-one, Sophie had to admit he’d aged well. In fact, if anything, he looked better now, like he’d grown into his face.

  D
aniel became aware of his body’s response to her closeness and quelled the reaction from years of practice. Her stare meant nothing. It was probably the way she stared at everyone. Probably the way she stared at Todd. No. Don’t think about Todd.

  ‘How’s Beryl?’ he asked huskily.

  ‘We discharged her a little while ago. She’ll be fine until next time. She’s such a darling.’

  Daniel heard the obvious affection in her voice and worried about her professional perspective where this particular patient was concerned. ‘You do know, Sophie, that one day soon, especially if she continues irritating her airways with cigarette smoke, she’s going to come in here and she’ll die?’

  ‘Of course, Daniel,’ she said, annoyed at his statement of the obvious. ‘So does she. That’s why she’s so scared.’

  ‘Well, are you going to be OK with that?’ he queried. ‘I thought health-care workers were supposed to maintain a professional distance?’

  ‘What are you saying, Daniel? Are you trying to tell me I don’t know how to do my job?’ She pushed him aside as she got up from the chair. She found herself angry again as four years of resentment bubbled to the surface.

  ‘I think you may be too close to her, yes. As a nurse, I think you should know the dangers of that better than anyone.’

  ‘I’m well aware of my professional boundaries, thank you very much. But sometimes the odd patient slips under the radar and, yes, I do have a soft spot for Beryl. You can think that’s terrible if you like, but personally I believe it separates the good nurses from the great nurses. And I’m a bloody great nurse, Daniel. Not that you would know.’

  ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ he asked quietly.

  ‘It means don’t lecture me on my professionalism when you don’t know the first thing about me. Don’t jet off to the other side of the world and waltz back in from time to time and think you deserve to pass judgement on how I do my job.’

  He heard the barely suppressed anger in her voice as her chest rose and fell. Rose and fell. ‘Well, pardon me for caring,’ he said sarcastically. ‘There was a time when you used to care about what I thought, valued my opinion.’

  ‘Oh, so now you care? Is that right, Daniel?’

  ‘I’ve always cared, Sophie,’ he sighed.

  ‘Well, that’s not what you said four years ago.’

  Four years ago he’d said what he’d said to make sure she would fall into Michael’s arms. And she had. Had been in them all along apparently. Max was proof of that. ‘You recovered quickly enough,’ he reminded her, a hard edge to his voice.

  She gasped, stunned at the accusation. He had told her to marry Michael, to be with Michael. ‘At least Michael knew how to love. Was capable of it,’ she said bitterly.

  ‘Sophie.’ Leah called her name as she bustled into the room, stopping dead when she realised she’d obviously interrupted something. ‘Everything OK in here?’

  ‘Fine,’ said Sophie smiling an overbright smile at her friend and then wincing as a sharp pain tore through the swelling on her cheekbone. ‘I was just leaving.’

  Sophie left the room with Leah with as much dignity as she could muster. Her body was quaking by the time she reached the desk. The gall. The absolute gall of the man to land back in her life and tell her how to do her job!

  And for him to accuse her of rushing straight from his arms to Michael’s. How dared he? He had practically offered her on a platter to his brother and now he was angry with her that she had done as he’d wanted?

  Or was he just angry that she had thrown herself into it with one hundred per cent commitment? She had loved Michael. Had always loved him. She may not have fallen in love with him but he had been her best friend and confidant. Becoming his wife had seemed the most natural thing in the world when he had needed her so much and she had needed a father for Max.

  And she was damned if she would be hanged for it!

  CHAPTER THREE

  SOPHIE woke with a start on Saturday morning to discover Max, who had got into bed with her at five a.m., was gone. It was now seven. Where was he? It was unusual for him to stir and for her not be aware of it. She must have been more tired than she’d thought. She hadn’t got away from her shift last night until close to midnight and her feet had throbbed and her calves had ached as she had fallen into bed.

  ‘Max,’ she called out, presuming he would just be playing in their suite of rooms somewhere. No answer. He was probably watching the morning cartoons, she decided as she dragged herself out of bed and headed for the sitting room. TV off, no sign of Max.

  John. He would be with John. Sophie quickly threw on her red gown with the large Chinese dragon embroidered on the back. She tightened the belt around her waist, ensuring her skimpy thong and tight T-shirt were fully covered.

  It was too hot at this time of the year to wear anything but the bare minimum of clothes to bed. It was only because of Max that she wore anything at all—it wasn’t that she hid her nudity from her son but a three-year-old’s curiosity could be exhausting!

  She walked briskly down the hallways. John wasn’t quite up to his regular morning visit from Max. It was a routine that they had fallen into and John had loved his early morning wake-up calls. Max would take a book and climb in next to his G.G., snuggling into the crook of his arm, and John would make his great-grandson giggle with his silly voices.

  She stopped at John’s door and peered through the small gap created by the door having been left slightly ajar. She could see John’s sleeping form and hear him snoring. No Max. Relief that he hadn’t disturbed John didn’t last long. If Max wasn’t there, where was he?

  She heard Max’s high-pitched giggle coming from further down the hallway and followed the joyous sound to…Daniel’s door. Great! She heard the low rumble of Daniel’s voice and gave up all hope of being able to extract her son from the room without Daniel noticing.

  She waited outside for a few moments, gathering the courage to enter. Something was obviously very funny. It sounded as if Max was being tickled if his squeals of delight were anything to go by. She didn’t want to see what waited for her behind the door. Coward, she admonished herself. It can’t be that bad.

  She knocked quietly and opened the door slowly. It was. It was that bad, and more! A shirtless Daniel was throwing Max up in to the air and catching him again in smooth easy movements. Max was laughing so hard they hadn’t even heard her enter. It was such an endearing picture Sophie felt her heart contract with love. To see her son with his father was way beyond anything she had words for.

  ‘Mummy!’ said Max, finally spying Sophie by the door. ‘Dan’s throwing me in the air!’

  ‘Uncle Dan,’ she corrected automatically, and then felt guilty at her deceit. The secret she had kept for four years suddenly weighing heavily on her.

  Daniel stopped his activity and plonked a protesting Max on the bed beside him. She was wearing his gown. The one he had bought her for her twenty-first birthday. Back when they had made love at every opportunity and she had worn it with nothing underneath.

  He drew his legs up beneath the sheet, tenting it to hide his quick reaction to the mental image that had flashed on his inward eye. His chest heaved a little still from the energy it had taken to repeatedly throw Max and then catch him. His arm muscles were already protesting the exercise.

  She looked beautiful this morning. Her blonde hair all messed up and her sleepy eyes regarding him warily. The belt of the gown emphasised her small waist and even the T-shirt that peeked out from the V of the gown wasn’t enough to disguise her braless state.

  ‘Again, Unca Dan, again,’ said Max, climbing onto Daniel’s chest and straddling it. ‘Giddy-up, Unca Dan.’ He laughed, riding Daniel like a horse.

  Daniel’s gaze unlocked from hers as he turned his attention back to Max and made a clippity-clop noise with his tongue and bounced Max up and down.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Sophie said, dragging her gaze away from his half-naked chest and finding her voice. ‘I hop
e he didn’t wake you.’

  ‘I was dozing,’ he said dismissively, not looking at her.

  ‘Come on, Max. Let’s leave Uncle Daniel to get some more sleep.’

  ‘Oh, Mum. Dan’s fun,’ Max said, and continued his ride.

  ‘He’s OK,’ Daniel assured her, concentrating on giving Max the bumpiest ride he could.

  She stood there awkwardly. They hadn’t seen each other since their heated discussion two nights ago and she was conscious of the strain between them.

  ‘I…I thought you’d be at work by now,’ she said, casting around for conversation.

  ‘I start nights tonight.’

  ‘Oh.’ Nights! He was working nights? And she had a ride-along scheduled for tonight. Was there some conspiracy going on somewhere to deliberately throw them together? John’s stroke. Charlie’s emergency. How were they supposed to spend twelve hours together in the close confines of an ambulance?

  ‘Problem?’ he asked, finally looking at her.

  ‘I’m rostered to do a ride-along tonight.’

  Silence enveloped them. Daniel had stopped being a horse and Max seemed content to just sit on his uncle’s chest. Damn it! He had known an RN was rostered on with him tonight; he’d just never thought it would be Sophie.

  ‘Oh,’ he replied.

  ‘I’m hungry, Mummy.’

  Grateful for the interruption, Sophie focussed on Max. ‘Why don’t you go down to the kitchen and see what Sally can fix you? Mummy will be there in a minute.’ There were things to say if they were going to get through their shift together.

  ‘Okey-dokey,’ chirped Max, giving Daniel’s abs one last giddy-up before scrambling off the bed and tearing out of the room.

  ‘Are we going to be OK tonight or should I try and reschedule?’ Sophie didn’t see any point in beating about the bush. If he didn’t think they could work together, she’d rather know now. Ride-alongs were notoriously difficult to switch due to advanced ambulance rostering. She wouldn’t be popular with the ambulance brass if she interfered with their tightly run ship.