Solitary Horseman

by Camp, Deborah

  Callum’s gaze sharpened and Banner looked away, suddenly feeling exposed, vulnerable, and foolish. His fingers curled around her chin and he forced her eyes to meet his again. His brow had furrowed and he shook his head, silently telling her not to believe her own ears.

  “I don’t know how he can tolerate being around those Paynes, can you?” Sadie lamented. “That Hollis makes my skin crawl! He’s loco, if you ask me. And she’s as rough as a corncob!”

  “Cal and his brothers always had a cur dog or two and they . . .” Lilah’s voice grew fainter until Banner couldn’t hear the words that had sliced her like shards of glass. Sadie’s giggle drifted in on the breeze and Banner shivered. She ducked under his arm, putting distance between them.

  “We should go.” She ran her hand across her burning eyes.

  “You don’t believe what they said, do you?”

  She loosened the tie under her chin and repositioned her bonnet onto her head. “Are you saying that you don’t want your cattle drinking from Mossy Springs?”

  “No.” He propped his hands at his waist in a belligerent stance. “A dependable water source is worth a lot to any cattleman.”

  She tightened the bow under her chin and walked with as much decorum as she could muster across the hay strewn ground and out into the sunlight again. Her insides trembled and her heart ached a little with each beat. Was everyone snickering behind her back, thinking that Callum was pulling the wool over her eyes?

  Not trusting herself to speak again with a ball of hot emotion clogging her throat, she climbed up onto the wagon seat and waited for Callum to tighten Pansy’s traces and check the hitch before he sat beside her. He slapped the reins against Pansy’s back and steered the wagon into a tight turn.

  “Hey, hey!” Sadie’s voice split the air. “Where you going? You’re not leaving!”

  Sadie walked briskly in their direction, waving a lacy handkerchief over her head to snag Callum’s attention. Lilah was right behind her. In response to her shouting at him, Callum only touched the brim of his hat and gave a nod as he steered the wagon off the grass and onto the road.

  Gripping the side rail as the wagon wheels jostled into the ruts, Banner turned sideways a little, away from Callum. She caught sight of Sadie’s murderous glare before tree trunks obscured it. In spite of her stinging feelings, a wicked smile raced across her lips.

  “You thinking I’m trying to finagle your land away from you and Hollis shows just how little you know of me.”

  Amazement and aggravation swirled inside of her. “Just how in tarnation am I supposed to know you when you hardly ever say more than ten words to me?” She puffed out a breath. “And why were you kissing me back there? I don’t understand this –” She motioned from her to him and back again.

  He made a face to illustrate his irritation and actually rolled his eyes. The juvenile response added to her irritation toward him.

  “Do you think I’m a woman of loose morals?” she demanded.

  “What?” He looked utterly baffled. “Why would I think that?”

  “Well, you keep grabbing me and kissing me like you’ve earned the right.”

  “If you don’t like it, say so.” He waited a few heartbeats and when she didn’t say anything, he said, “I told you that I think you’re pretty.” He turned his face away from her as if he didn’t want her to read his expression. “And I’m sure as hell not aiming to steal your land.”

  She closed her eyes, still shaken by her inability to tell him that she didn’t want his kisses. Moistening her lips, she could still taste him. Mint and cinnamon. Passion and sin. “I don’t truly believe that’s what you’re doing,” she confessed. “What bothers me is that everyone else believes it.”

  “Why do you care? It’s none of their damned business.”

  “Easy for you to say. You and your family are like royalty around here.”

  “That’s bull.”

  “It’s the gospel truth and you know it.” She winced inwardly at the slight tremble in her voice. “People look up to you and your kin. It’s different for me. Like at the barbecue. Folks greeted you, but not me.”

  “Now that’s just not . . .” The rest of his objection died on his tongue. His green gaze flickered to her. “They aren’t used to seeing you around, that’s all.”

  “They didn’t fling open their arms in a big, old ‘howdy there, stranger’, did they?”

  He stared at Pansy’s bobbing head for a minute before giving a shrug. “They sure as hell don’t treat me like royalty. If they did, they’d listen to me and wouldn’t be talking about shooting and stringing up Indians and Yankees and anyone else they don’t trust.”

  That shored up her defenses again. “Will they hurt Mary and her family?”

  “If they do, there will be hell to pay from me. I told them that, too. Left no doubt about it. Eller sitting there like some judge spouting law. I wanted to skin him.”

  “He’s always been a hot head.”

  “The war should have cooled him off. Should have cooled everyone off.”

  “It acted on people in different ways. Pacified some and whetted the appetite for violence in others.” Haunting memories flitted through her mind, making her wince. “I saw men fresh from battle, bleeding and hurting, but with a fever in their eyes for more blood, more pain. I didn’t understand it, but I witnessed it.”

  “I saw it, too. Hell, I felt it. But the war is over. Some people are trying to hold on to the old ways and old beliefs. They’re angry that the Union won. I understand that. It churns in my gut, too, and sometimes I want to howl at the injustices rained down on us.” He gripped the reins more tightly as the muscles in his jaw tightened. “What I don’t want is a bunch of cowards wearing masks doling out frontier justice.”

  She didn’t say anything, stunned by his sudden spurt of conversation. When he glanced her way and raised an eyebrow, she cleared her throat. “Forgive me. I was momentarily rendered mute by your speech.”

  “Lecture, you mean.”

  “No, not at all. I’m worried, too.” She balled her hands in her lap. “I want peace. I need it. Hollis needs it most of all. When he hears about things like this, he gets worse.”

  “Worse, how?”

  “He shakes and cries, rocks back and forth and talks about the things he saw, the boys who died, our brothers who are gone. I don’t know what to do for him when he gets like that.”

  “He never tries to hurt you, does he?”

  “No, never that. What scares me the most is that I’m afraid he’ll h-hurt himself.” She stared down at her hands as her vision blurred with tears. She blinked them away.

  “Best you can do is listen to him and try to direct his thoughts away from the battlefields.” Callum’s tone was as gentle as a breeze. “Dwelling on those memories will drive any sane man raving mad.”

  Pansy whinnied and tossed her head, alerting them to a big, ornery bull standing in the middle of the road. The massive animal pawed at the dirt and snorted as Callum tugged on the reins and brought Pansy to a stop.

  The steer stared at them and Callum stared at it. “Guess we’ll wait him out.”

  After a minute, Banner shifted on the hard seat. “Can’t you make him move out of the way?”

  Callum turned wide eyes on her. “And how would you suggest I do that? He outweighs me by a ton and he has horns. He’ll move when he feels like it.”

  Another minute ticked by and the breeze grew cooler. Banner shivered and wished for her shawl. The roadblock snorted and feinted at Pansy, making her whinny and prance in place.

  “What a big bully.” Losing all patience with males, in general, Banner stood up in the wagon and waved her arms above her head. “Move, you big lump! Get along now!”

  “Banner, sit the hell down!” Callum grabbed her elbow and pulled her back down onto the seat, none too gently. “You’re making it worse. . .” His voice faded away, stolen by the sight of the stubborn bull ambling slowly off the road and onto the pas
ture land. “Well, I’ll be damned.” He looked sideways at her, sunlight finding his green eyes and glinting in them, and a half-smile tilted his lips before a rumbling chuckle emerged from him.

  Banner covered her open mouth with her hands in mock shock. “Goodness! Can it be that you’re actually amused?”

  “You can be right entertaining.” His smile grew as he shook his head and clucked Pansy into a walk. “Tell me something . . .”

  She fluffed her skirts, waiting for him to continue.

  “Do you trust me or don’t you?”

  She could hardly think with him smiling at her like that. “I want to,” she allowed, and winced when his smile wavered. “I trust you more than anyone, excepting Hollis, of course.”

  “If that’s the best you can do . . .” He shrugged and faced front again, the smile sliding off his lips. “Guess I’ll take it for now. But I aim to prove to you that I’m not doing anything behind your back or trying to take advantage of you.”

  “I don’t really . . .” She stared at her hands in her lap, unable to finish that declaration because the truth of it was that a small part of her didn’t trust him.

  “Yes, you do . . . really not trust me.” He clucked his tongue again and Pansy picked up her pace. “That’s okay. There aren’t a handful of people in this world that I trust either.” He glanced at her. “You and your brother are among them.”

  She started, stunned by his faith in them. “Why us?”

  “I’m a fairly good judge of people.”

  She dropped into silence as she grappled with wanting to thank him and feeling guilty for not returning the compliment. She considered herself a good judge of character, too, and she liked Callum Latimer. More than liked him. She admired him. Trust, though . . . that was a tough one. The only men she’d ever trusted had been or were related to her. The few times she’d made herself vulnerable to suitors, she’d regretted it. There had only been three and they had all managed to chip away at her self-respect.

  The wagon turned onto her land and Pansy’s ears jutted forward. Within a few minutes, the house came into view and Pansy broke into a trot.

  “She’s happy to be home,” Callum said.

  “Yes, and so am I.”

  “You didn’t find it enjoyable, did you?”

  “It was nice to get away from here for a few hours.”

  “I admit that I’m in my own head too much these days and don’t always see everything around me.” He pulled on the reins, stopping Pansy just inside the barn, and set the brake. He didn’t look at Banner, although he was speaking directly to her. “From here on, I’ll pay more attention.”

  She studied him, unable to fully understand what he was saying to her. When his gaze suddenly found hers, his green eyes darkened with resolution and desire flickered in their depths. “I don’t need your attention, Callum. If you’re talking about me trusting you—”

  “No, I understand I’ll have to earn that. I’m talking about how you’re treated. After watching the ranch hands acting foolish over you and that Yankee Decker trying to woo you, I just figured you were treated kindly by everyone in these parts. Now that you mention it, though, I know that’s not true. But, like I told you before, I take care of family, friends, and my partners. I won’t abide people disrespecting you.”

  “Callum, I didn’t tell you that because I wanted you to fight my battles. Respect, like trust, has to be earned. It’s up to me—”

  “That’s not entirely true. You haven’t done a damn thing to any of those people for them to shun you or for Sadie and Lilah to talk about you like they did.” He held up one hand to stop her from speaking. “I’m on a roll here, so you best let me talk. I understand why they do what they do. After all, I was raised to treat Paynes like vermin, but that doesn’t make it right or forgivable. And most of us were raised to not trust Yankees, to fear Indians, and to treat Negroes like beasts of burden. But now we have to learn to live with them as neighbors and friends.” He shrugged. “Live and learn, Banner. Live and learn.”

  She smiled. “Well, if for nothing else, I’m glad I went with you today because we’re talking like two normal people and you smiled and laughed with me.”

  A small smile poked at the corner of his mouth before he jumped down from the wagon and came around to help her out of it. His hands at her waist made her scintillatingly aware of his strength. She balanced herself by planting her hands on his shoulders and felt as if she weighed no more than a feather as he lifted her and then set her on her feet with care.

  “Thank you, Callum,” she said, unable to meet his gaze.

  “You’re welcome.”

  Hearing the humor in his tone, she glanced up and was surprised when he winked at her. “What’s that for?” she asked, laughing a little.

  “For you.” He bobbed one shoulder before letting go of her. “You go on inside and I’ll see to Pansy.” He trailed his fingers over the limp flowers hanging in her mane. “You going to church in the morning?”

  “Yes, I believe I will.”

  He nodded. “Good. See you tomorrow.”

  She left him to change out of her fancy dress and back into her normal clothes. By the time she’d finished putting on her split skirt, old shirt, and work boots, she heard him riding away. Unable to help herself, she peeked through the window, appreciating the way he sat on the horse and the easy movement of his body.

  Her thoughts scurried back to that other barn . . . in the shadows . . . his mouth hungry on hers.

  Trust. Not only did she not trust him completely, she didn’t trust herself when she was with him. When he kissed her, she ached for more and more. Turning away from the window, she jerked when she saw a silhouette in the bedroom doorway.

  “Hollis! You scared a year off me!” She pressed a hand over her bucking heart.

  “Did you have a good time?”

  She shrugged. “It was okay.”

  “Altus Decker was here today.”

  She sat in a chair and plucked pins from her hair. “I suppose he still wants to buy our land.”

  “He says that Cal Latimer has told everyone that he’s taken over our land. That it belongs to him now.”

  “Do you actually believe that?” She combed her fingers through her hair.

  “He asked me if I knew that Latimer was sullying your name. Says that Latimer has told everyone he’s bedded you.”

  She jumped up from the chair, propelled by indignation. “You certainly can’t believe that!” How dare Decker spout such lies about her!

  “He hasn’t, has he?”

  She was walking past him, but she spun around so suddenly that he backed into the door facing. “You are not asking me that, Hollis Payne!” She shoved a fist in front of his face and shook it. “Are you? Are you?”

  His eyes widened and he shook his head once.

  The anger left her like a flame snuffed out by a quick exhale of breath and she slumped. “I’m sorry, Hollis. I just . . . I’m tired of being pointed at . . . ridiculed.”

  “Were you treated like that today?”

  “No. Well, some people were hateful, but not everyone.” She rested a hand on is shirtfront. “You know how it is. They need to whittle on people to make themselves feel bigger.”

  Hollis looked so sad, it wrenched her heart and she put her arms around him and hugged him tightly.

  “It’s okay! We have each other.”

  “I’m sorry I asked you, Banner. I shouldn’t’ve. I know you’re a good girl.”

  She rubbed her cheek against the scratchy material of his shirt. “The thing is, Hollis, I’m not a girl anymore. I’m a woman and I do like Callum. I think he likes me some, too.” She felt Hollis’s heart give a kick.

  “You’re a good woman, though.”

  “I am.” She raised her head to meet his worried gaze. “And Callum is a good man. He’s been good to us, hasn’t he?”

  Hollis nodded.

  “So, we won’t listen to people who talk bad about him –
or about me. Let them flap their gums.” She wrinkled her nose playfully, goading him toward a more congenial mood. “We know better.”

  “Folks are flapping their gums a lot lately.” He rested his callused palm against her cheek. “You be careful, little sister. Words can hurt you. They can cut like a knife and scar you up real bad.”

  Chapter 9

  “You look quite lovely this morning, Miss Payne,” Albert Decker said as he walked from the church beside Banner. “Did your brother mention that I stopped by yesterday?”

  “He did.” She edged her elbow from his grasp and put a bit more distance between them. “He told me you were gossiping about me.”

  “What?” Decker gave her a shocked look she didn’t believe for a second. “I must dissuade you of that notion. I did mention what I had heard others saying, but I did so because I felt your brother should know that your honor and good name are being trampled by Callum Latimer.”

  “I’m not worried. My honor and my name have been trampled by nearly everyone in these parts, so that’s nothing new.” She quickened her step. “You’ll excuse me, sir. I must get back home. Good day to you.”

  “The people here haven’t embraced me, either, so I am most understanding. I thought that you might join me for a picnic and a buggy ride. It’s such a beautiful day.” He nearly trotted to keep next to her, as pesky as a blue fly.

  “No, thank you. I have chores waiting for me.” She drew nearer her wagon and barely resisted the urge to sprint to it.

  “As I’ve said before, a lady as fine as you shouldn’t be working so hard. You should be treasured like the rare jewel you are.”

  She closed her eyes for a second to keep from rolling them. “Well, this jewel has hogs to slop and clothes to wash. Goodbye.” Grabbing the seat rail and placing her foot on the side of the front wheel, she hoisted herself up into the vehicle so quickly that Decker had no chance to place his hands on her to assist her. Just as she’d planned. She snatched up the reins, released the brake, and Pansy took off.